I know I said I wasn't taking requests anymore, but I got this one a while back and decided I really wanted to do it.
You said you wanted a threesome between Dick, Jason, and Y\N here it is. Fandoms--Unlimited
You had one goal for tonight. To lay Dick Grayson. In a coffin. As in kill him. You were not planning to hook up with him in a coffin.
But then the train of thought started, could you even? Was it possible? Was there enough room in there?
'No!' You said to yourself, 'stop having silly thoughts. Of course, there wouldn't be enough room.'
Or would there? You pulled your phone from your clutch and were halfway through googling it when you realized how irreverent this was.
You tucked your phone back in your butt pocket, but then realized you didn't have pockets.
You'd spent your last paycheck on getting sexy leather pants. They had no pockets. But they looked so good!
As it turned out. It was a formal event and you were supposed to knock him off and then disappear into the crowd. So you had to wear a dress. but you wore them underneath because you'd spend 300 bucks on these things and you were not going to just not wear them because it was inconvenient.
Sure, they might not have been breathable or flexible, but they made your butt look incredible. Besides, they held you back no more than your ex. Thankfully your pants wouldn't leave you for a better-looking girl. You hoped. No, they couldn't leave you for a better-looking girl, they couldn't fit a better-looking girl. That's another reason you invested in getting sexy leather pants they are exceptionally loyal companions. Unlike Eliot.
Besides, every hired killer needed sexy leather pants, and to know whether or not you can have intercourse in a casket. You pressed search.
Google had no answer, but you did now know you had to set a budget before buying one, as they could cost into the thousands, and sometimes the grief of having lost a loved one can impair judgment.
You decided not to worry about your phone, you could buy a new one after tonight. You flung it over your shoulder and opened your clutch to take out some gum as it landed on an unsuspecting passerby.
Looking in the mirror you saw an elderly man laying on the floor with your phone in pieces next to him.
I guess Mr. Jones (your mystery client) will just get one kill for free.
You spotted your target in a crowd of people.
Coming closer you reach into your skirt for the knife when your arm was suddenly grabbed by someone. Looking up you saw a man with dark hair and green eyes, the target's younger brother, Jason Todd.
Had he seen the dagger? Why had he singled you out?
At any rate, you needed to avert suspicion.
You decided to use your lighting speed intelligence you prided yourself upon, "nice weather we're having."
"Excuse me, I'm Jason Todd, the birthday boy's adopted brother, how do know him?" He asked, he smiled, but you could tell he wasn't sincere.
It took you only a moment to come back with a response-you'd been expecting someone to ask, so you practiced in the mirror before they told you you had to leave the changing room-you looked him dead in the eye and casually responded, "I went to school with him, we dated for a bit, but ended up breaking up, we're still friends though."
"Oh really, then he'd definitely remember you. Why don't we go over and tell him happy birthday?" He said, guiding you towards him.
You quickly shoved his hand off your arm, "he looks busy, I'll tell him later." You hurried away or did your best to hurry in your tight leather pants.
You shut yourself in the bathroom, you needed a disguise and a new plan.
Your legs were uncomfortably hot.
Just then an old woman wearing a blond wig walked in.
You couldn't find a contact on her phone that specified anyone to be her significant other, so you decide to group text everyone, "I'm going home, don't worry I'm fine."
You stuck the phone in a newly acquired pocket and locked the door behind you.
Jason was hanging around Dick and seemed to be keeping watch. Since you hadn't changed your face you didn't think getting too close would be a good idea.
Never before had you thrown a knife, intentionally at least. But you decided tonight would be a good time to learn.
You flung it across the ballroom, and it hit. The wall. It stayed for a split second before dropping to the ground. You wished you'd tied a string to the handle to retrieve it.
But Jason noticed, you locked eyes for a split second before you shot away.
You raced down the halls wrenching open doors and zooming through rooms. A frightening sharp pinging urging you forward to race faster. It quickened, you quickened your furious hop which was all you could really do to move quickly in these sexy leather pants. The realization this might not be the best way to escape came after the fifth time having to turn around because of the dead end of a bathroom.
On your sixth time discovering you ran into a bathroom, you realized he wasn't chasing you and the pinging was coming from you. Not unlike some kind of deep power and or strength that you had at first attributed to an outside source, but was actually inside of you all along.
However it wasn't inside of you but your dress, and it wasn't a hidden strength but rather your phone. You flipped it to find several messages, one being from Paul. After all this time, he said he'd never speak to you again, but here it was. A message after all this time.
[Why should care?]
You tried to remember the last text you'd sent. But then you remembered he'd been the last one to text, saying he never wanted to speak to you again and to lose his number. Which was really strange since you only had his number to pick up something for a mutual friend.
You decided to go with the safe answer,
[lol same]
There were also like twenty more.
[But you don't drive!]
[is this a code?]
[as long as we're on the subject just give me cash this year]
[the gun is in the trash can outside hidden in a pizza box along with the goods]
[text me when you get back]
[what you were my ride home!]
You didn't really remember who half these people were or what you'd spoken about last so you just group texted everyone, "lol same".
Paul would just have to deal with two.
You slipped it back into your pocket and went to the sink. Sweat ran like a river down your face and your legs were starting to feel painfully hot. You splashed your face with cold water and pulled off the gown and slid down on the floor, your legs felt seared to the touch and you were honestly afraid of what you would find underneath.
Another ping came, it was from Mindy, probably confused as to why she's texted so late. You wondered why everyone had picked now to text you. You opened the text.
[wtf?]
You were about to respond when another came from Elliot, you hadn't heard from him in months. You thought he'd forgotten about you. The message made you well up.
[you left without me?]
He'd been waiting this whole time? No, he left. You wouldn't be fooled so easily this time.
[what about Nancy?]
The response came back quickly,
[Who?]
Had the rumors not been true? Had he not written the breakup note you found on your fridge?
I couldn't find a sticky note I'm leaving you for Nancy, she's prettier.
If you left now, you could have a life together. If you held back yourself and sacrificed for him. Your dreams, your friends, yourself. No, you weren't going back to that hell. Not even for the new Netflix password. You'd never be that girl again. You were over him.
[I'm never coming back!]
[What are you talking about?]
[Don't gaslight me! I'm done with you and your stupid mind tricks!]
[Why is Robert still here?]
[Because he's my dog and his name is Bob! Get out of my house! Leave your key and lose my number!]
You turned off your notification and stood up. You went outside. After a bit of digging you found the pizza box, inside was a loaded gun and an envelope you took the gun and left the envelope.
It was heavy in your hand and you wondered how you'd sneak it in. But then you realized you wouldn't have to. He was standing outside, and Jason was nowhere to be found.
You raised the gun. You aimed. Your finger slipped to the trigger. You started to press down on it. Gritting your teeth. Preparing for the blast. Jason slammed you to the ground. Dick turned.
"Oh hi Y\N!" he greeted with a smile, but his face turned stern, "Jason why did you knock over Y\N?"
"She was trying to kill you!"
His face turned to hurt, "I thought we agreed we were better as friends."
"It's not about that Dick," you assured, "I have nothing against you, I was just hired to kill you for a hundred thousand dollars."
The consolation you were doing it for personal profit rather than a vendetta did not seem to comfort him much.
"I found our employer. Garrison Frank, he's running for mayor of Blùdhaven, and Dick was quoted saying he didn't think he would be a good choice." Tim said, walking out.
"Do you know where he is to pick him up?"
"Demonspawn's working on it...." he stopped for a moment, "I just realized what a poor decision that was."
"We need to find him before Damian does," Dick said, panic in his voice.
"He's been passed out in the middle of the dance floor for quite some time now." Barbra said, coming outside, "a bunch of teens noticed him get knocked out by a flying phone. None of them were sure what to do so they just decided to start Fortnite dancing with lemons in a circle around him."
"No one was even drunk at that point, who would have just flung their phone?"
"No clue, but they threw it hard enough to knock him out so they must have flung it pretty hard."
Please leave a like and comment to thank me for being stupid! It isn't easy.