I was currently in a bit of a predicament.
"Come with me! We'll get you to warmth and shelter!"
The girl standing in front of me had an almost blinding smile, tipping an umbrella toward me, who was sitting under a store canopy. To the side was a blue sedan she presumably came from, "Ashinaga" emblazoned on its side in bright gold. The overcast sky and cool, rainy weather meant few people were out, despite it being a Sunday morning.
Note to self: never sit on the side of a road again, especially on a rainy day.
"Thank you for your kindness, but I'm fine right now."
"How can you say that when you're completely soaked? It's expected to rain until evening. You'll fall ill soon if you keep this up."
One look at the girl's alluring blue eyes, and I knew that she was being completely genuine with her intentions. Come to think of it, she looked like a miniature version of my manager apart from her hair, which was strawberry blonde in color. Coincidences sure could be freaky.
She was right, though. I hadn't anticipated rainfall today. Luckily, I had woken up before it started raining, meaning the only casualty was my white gown. It now clung to my skin, making me shiver every so often, but I had experienced worse without falling sick. The indoor shoes I received yesterday as part of my store uniform protected my feet from the elements. However, being designed for the indoors, their use was limited.
I was reminded of the importance of having a roof over my head. Not only would a shelter keep me warm and dry, but I could also keep my belongings there instead of carrying them with me, like right now.
That thought made the girl's offer all the more enticing. However, it was her generosity precisely that subconsciously made me wary of her.
I could not understand this form of unbridled kindness. When I looked at the people who gave me money after walking away, I could reasonably infer that they did so for satisfaction on their part. Some smiled to themselves, others continued their day with a newfound spring in their step, and others still seemed happy for me upon doing charity. In all cases, a boost to their morale was what they received in exchange for generously paying me. I was unaware of why giving up precious money was a cause to be happier, but at least a deal of some sort had taken place, and I could take solace in that they were unlikely to come asking for their money back in the future.
This case was different. It was not a one-and-done "I get money, you get joy" deal but rather an arrangement that went beyond money. Based on the girl's words, I anticipated receiving warm clothing and temporary shelter if I accepted her offer, but both were expensive. To provide such costly necessities for a fleeting moment of happiness was beyond foolish. I may have been wrong about those who thought me a beggar, but I could not treat this girl the same as them. I had to be on guard.
"What are you thinking about so much?" asked the girl, tilting her head. Cute. "You look a bit sad." Do I? Perhaps she was mistaking my apathetic veneer for gloominess.
"I have a hard time expressing myself, that's all," I said.
"I see. In that case, come along with me!" That bright smile was back on her face. She was almost the opposite of me when it came to emotions.
She gently took my arm with her free hand, but I quickly pulled it away. Upon realizing what had transpired, her eyes rounded, and she gaped at me.
"What's wrong?" she asked quietly, her sweet, high-pitched voice cracking slightly. I could tell that she was not used to being rejected like this. If I was normal, I might have fallen for her by now.
But I could not trust her when so much was at stake. She sounded sincere in her wish to get me to warmth and shelter, but perhaps she wanted precisely that for a more sinister goal. If I went along with her, she could use the warm clothes I receive as an excuse to extort me out of my money and potentially throw me into crippling debt. If she was cunning, she might even make me do her bidding, establishing a relationship where I became dependent on her. In the worst-case scenario, the shelter she spoke of could be my enemies' lair. No, this was too risky.
I would have to choose my next words carefully. If my rejection of the girl's offer was too harsh, she could notify her companion in the sedan and chase after me. At the same time, I wanted to take advantage of this situation if possible.
I stood up while brushing the dirt off my gown, shaking my head. "I don't need your help," I said plainly.
Social interaction was not my forte, so this was the best response I could muster. I did not know if I had antagonized the girl. All I could do was wait and take it one step at a time.
"But you look miserable! Where did you sleep last night?" She was surprisingly perceptive. She had most likely noticed the two plastic bags next to me and deduced that those were my belongings.
"In a home," I lied.
"Where?"
"Do you think I would tell a stranger where I live?"
The girl pouted. "You don't have to be so wary of me, you know..." she trailed off sadly, looking downcast. "I'm with Ashinaga, a non-profit charity organization. I'm only here to help!" Like a switch had flipped, she was back to smiling at me. With my nonexistent interpersonal skills, I could not comprehend this sudden switch in emotion, especially when every single act of hers appeared totally genuine.
But a charity organization, huh? Since they were non-profit, they subsisted on donations, which they would then use to buy the clothes and shelters mentioned by the girl. Although I was a beneficiary of various donors, the idea of an organization depending on only charity at a large scale was shaky at best. It was more likely for charity organizations to be a front for money laundering than for them to properly help people. Perhaps this girl was out of the loop and did not know the reality of her organization, or maybe everything I had just thought was false and non-profit organizations were legitimate.
Considering that my reasoning was inconclusive, there was only one task remaining.
"Say, Ichinose..." I started. It was a gamble, but enough features matched between the girl and the Ministop manager for me to be largely confident in its accuracy.
"Ye— how do you know my name?" She froze, looking at me with wide eyes.
My speculation had hit the mark, creating an opening. Ignoring her captivating stare, I picked up my possessions with my left hand and snatched Ichinose's umbrella with my right. I then began running opposite to where she had come from, leaving her to get drenched in the steadily increasing downpour.
"Hey! Wait up! Why are you running?" Three seconds later, I heard Ichinose's dejected voice ring through the street.
Thank you for the free umbrella, Ichinose. If you genuinely wished to help me, I am truly sorry.
Without so much as a glance behind me, I sprinted away, escaping from the trouble that was unconditional kindness.
~~~
Once I determined that nobody was chasing after me, I found myself in an unfamiliar area of Tokyo. The wind howled around me, blowing the umbrella upside down for the seventh time in thirty minutes. The rain's intensity had not let up, meaning my body, already dripping with water, was again sodden.
A regular person would immediately seek shelter, but I found myself silently reveling in this new experience. The grey, cloudy sky blotting out the Sun, the feeling of cool rain on my smooth skin, the refreshing taste of rainwater. All were new sensations that satiated my curiosity.
I inhaled deeply, held my breath, then exhaled slowly. Pollution from vehicle and factory emissions was grounded by incoming raindrops, making the air as clean as it would ever be. I looked skywards and held my arms aloft. This was true freedom — the ability to experience what I wanted when I wanted.
Crack!
Thunder rumbled across the street as the wind rushed past my face, causing my flattened hair to sway in the storm. A few seconds later, a bolt of lightning shot from the clouds, sizzling the asphalt of the next street over.
Brilliant.
Like always, pictures did no justice to the real spectacle. Unfortunately, I would have to seek shelter for my own safety.
Looking to my left, I noticed a parking lot and bicycle rack for a large, multi-story building. Upon closer inspection, it appeared to be a shopping mall. To the best of my knowledge, malls contained a variety of retail stores and restaurants, which made it likely that I would find a place to rest there. It would also be a new experience, making this a win-win scenario for me.
I jogged into the mall while adjusting the umbrella to be right side up. Thankfully, few people were at the entrance, meaning my appearance garnered little attention. A minute of searching later, I found a largely vacant bench, which I gratefully sat on. I set my belongings down and rested, studying the various shops, vending machines, and people.
My analysis was interrupted by a fit of giggles. Turning to my left, I found a girl around my age sitting on the opposite side of the bench, trembling with a hand placed on her mouth.
Upon noticing my curious gaze, she stopped shaking.
"Sorry, sorry..." she said, bowing repeatedly.
"I don't mind," I replied indifferently, waving her off.
I thought that was the end of the matter, but to my surprise, she scooted closer to me.
"If I may ask, what was that?" Her wide crimson eyes gazed at me expectantly, but strangely, she seemed to stare through, rather than at, me.
"What?"
"Whatever the fuck you were doing out there," she said sweetly, pointing at a floor-to-ceiling window next to the entrance. The place where I had stopped was clearly visible. "You were running, then stopped and did some pose, then ran here without so much as wiping your shoes on the mat."
So that was why the janitor was glaring at me...
"You saw?"
"Everything," she said, snickering at me while twiddling with her shoulder-length beige hair. "That was so weird, you know? Especially when you were completely drenched and had that blank face on the whole time. I've never seen anything like it!" She dissolved into another fit of giggles.
Was my celebration of freedom that amusing? I wasn't sure how to handle this situation, so I decided on a neutral response.
"I don't understand, but I suppose it's fine if you're happy," I said monotonously.
"That voice too! God, you're funny! Aren't you a little too calm for your situation?" She referred to my soaked body. Drops of water fell from my hair to the tile floor below, and my white gown tightly hugged the contours of my body.
"Is that bad?" I asked, tilting my head.
"Not really. It's just unusual for anyone our age to be that way."
"I see." I took a towel out from my bag and began dabbing my hair and body dry. Fortunately, the money wrapped within it was intact. I wouldn't need to go hungry, although I undoubtedly needed a place to store my money. Could a minor like me open a bank account? I should investigate that soon.
"You're a terrible conversationalist, you know."
I looked back toward my beige-haired companion. "Says the girl who insults a stranger without reason," I joked.
She frowned. "I thought you were okay with it!"
"I am," I replied casually, resuming drying my hair. Did I tease someone just now? Interesting.
The girl's cheeks puffed up in anger.
"Oh, fuck off," she said in an uncharacteristically low-pitched voice.
"If you wish." I stood and made to collect my belongings.
She began waving her hands frantically. "I didn't mean literally! Come back!"
Sighing deeply, I sat back down on the bench.
"Please be clearer with your intentions next time," I stated bluntly.
The girl pouted. Cute. "I was joking! Wasn't that obvious?"
I stared blankly into her carmine eyes. Social interaction was already onerous for an emotionless person such as me. Such nuance in a person's words was almost impossible to discern without tapping into my cold reading skills, an unnecessary expenditure of energy. I briefly contemplated why conversations could not be only straightforward, but I figured if that were the case, every person would be similar to me.
There was also the matter of me teasing her. A spontaneous reaction was out of place for me, but so was this conversation. Every conversation in the White Room had an underlying motive guiding it, whether directly or subtly. Even in this exchange, my brain searched for why the girl started a conversation with me. Unable to find anything, it shut down, leaving me free to have what people would call a regular exchange of words. It really was a unique experience.
Speaking of the girl, she seemed unsettled by my gaze, choosing to avert her eyes.
"Why are you staring at me so intently? Pervert."
"People tend to hate in others those qualities they see in themselves," I said, recalling an old adage from a textbook. I decided to let this conversation flow naturally and see what insights I could gain from it regarding myself.
The girl smiled sweetly at me, but the smile did not reach her eyes. As the masterpiece of the White Room, it should be easy enough to assuage her anger. Let's see, what should I do...
"Um, I didn't get your name," I said awkwardly, trying to change the topic and break the increasingly tense silence between us.
"So you'll just change the topic and think I won't notice?" She crossed her arms, laying them over her denim jacket. Task failed.
"I don't want to keep referring to you as a girl in my head," I said innocently.
"Well, I don't give my name to perverts," she spat, glaring at me.
"Sorry..." I lowered my head slightly.
"That didn't sound apologetic in the least."
"Have you heard my voice? Besides, I never had that intention."
The girl sighed. "I'll forgive you just this once. The name's Kushida Kikyou. First-year at Musashi Junior High. I'll consider telling you more if you're good to me."
The same school as Horikita-senpai? Coincidences were very freaky today.
"Ayanokouji Kiyotaka," I replied, extending a hand. "I'm just a wandering misfit." I suppose I should thank that magenta-haired delinquent for helping me to create a decent introduction.
I was expecting Kushida to shake my hand, but she instead left me hanging. I had read that one was supposed to introduce themself with a handshake. Was that not the case?
Kushida burst into laughter. "What are you, a middle-aged businessman? And what kind of introduction was that? You're really fucking weird." I take back everything I said about that delinquent. On an unrelated note, her words brought back memories of the past.
Shaking off the growing thoughts forming in my head, I looked at Kushida in confusion.
"Also, close that umbrella."
Wait, umbrellas close?
~~~
We spent the next thirty minutes chatting about trivial topics. I say "chat," but it was more of me following Kushida's lead.
We were currently eating lunch at a sushi restaurant. Fully expecting me to be kicked out for looking like a vagrant, Kushida forced me to change into my store uniform, despite my objections. I may have read about why appearance matters, but I felt that society would be better off prioritizing comfort and functionality over aesthetics regarding clothing.
There was also the tiny problem of me having never seen a picture of, let alone eaten, sushi. I attempted to follow Kushida's eating style, only to fail innumerable times.
"Why are you only taking a bite after I do?" asked Kushida, picking up on my plight.
"Would you believe me if I said the reason?" I responded, focusing on lifting the delicious sashimi correctly.
"Try me."
"I've never eaten sushi before," I admitted. In fact, I had never heard of sushi before until today. The White Room may have taught me "useful" concepts, but without worldly knowledge, how did they expect me to survive when my training inevitably finished? Perhaps they were planning to imprison me for my entire life. If that is the case, I was glad to receive this opportunity.
Kushida sputtered, then started coughing. I poured her a glass of water, which she accepted gratefully.
"Are you for real?" she asked incredulously, now recovered from her shock.
"I'm just as real as you."
"You idiot, that's not what I meant." Kushida facepalmed. "Is what you said true?"
"Yes, until today, I have not even seen sushi once."
"Do you live under a rock or something?" asked Kushida exasperatedly.
I knew it was an idiom, but I did literally sleep under a protruding rock at Sayami Park last night. It was a truly wondrous experience to lay on the grassy plain and stare at the glittering night sky, but I could not keep doing so if I wished to experience all there was.
"I have strict parents," I replied. "They restrict my diet and prevent me from going out that much." By my use of the present tense, Kushida was unlikely to press further on my personal life. Although, if she was observant enough, she might put enough pieces of the puzzle together to understand my current situation.
"That does explain a lot of your strange behavior..." It was nice not being pitied for my condition for once, but I was more interested in why her body momentarily stiffened when I mentioned strict parents.
I decided to steer the conversation in a certain direction. "Even if I don't show it, I don't like being called 'weird' or 'strange' every five minutes," I remarked, feigning irritation.
"I would believe that if your voice changed even a tiny bit while saying that, gloomy bastard," replied Kushida dismissively.
"I can't help it." I shrugged. Why did she continue to insult me?
Kushida sighed exasperatedly. "That's exactly what makes you weird."
"I could say the same about you. For example, it's a Sunday afternoon, yet you're here alone."
"You're one to talk, 'wandering misfit.'"
I suppose humans are inherently social. They live in families, work in teams, and follow norms set by culture, the latter of which originated from living as a group. Consequently, loners were bound to be singled out and attract unwanted attention, especially at school, where friendship was encouraged. I hoped that as part of my journey, I would be able to form meaningful connections with other people. I wasn't so idealistic as to think I could experience the warmth of friendship or hatred of enmity. However, I did want to see if a relationship could go beyond transactional without infringing on its usefulness. Could I be close to other people? Did I deserve these bonds characteristic of humanity?
"I was simply curious, that's all," I said, ignoring her previous quip. "You're cute and gregarious, so I assumed you would have many friends."
For some reason, Kushida's cheeks briefly flushed a light pink. She then kicked me under the table. It didn't hurt, but it was still unexpected.
"What was that for?" I had only complimented her, after all.
"For trying to pick me up, fucker. You're just like the rest of them."
I was slightly perplexed, but I deemed it best not to ask for clarification upon seeing her slight glare.
"I just said what was on my mind," I said, hoping she would calm down.
"Talking to you is like talking to a wall." Kushida sighed again. "To answer your question, I decided not to hang out with them today. You got a problem with that?"
She was beginning to act unusually defensive. I was getting closer to prising out the opening I sought, but a little more effort was required.
"No, not at all. Thanks to your decision, I am currently eating with a beautiful girl. Although, I find it unusual to turn down an invitation when you're free. Do you not enjoy the company of your friends?"
"I'd rather not say," growled Kushida, more or less confirming my earlier suspicions. She picked up her chopsticks and began eating again, indicating she no longer wished to talk.
"Keep your secrets. If you do want to talk about it, though, I'm here. I have no connections to anyone in your life, so anything you say will remain with me."
Kushida ignored me. However, going by her thoughtful expression, I could tell that my words had made it through to her.
I was curious about the pain she carried. The way her eyes glossed over from time to time, her defensiveness when I mentioned her family and friends, and our recent exchange all implied a form of personal strife. I could have used more forceful methods to extract the truth from her, but antagonizing people in this new world was not my plan. Thus, I had merely left the door open for her, figuratively speaking. As we got closer, I was sure she would voluntarily open up to me.
The concept of human vulnerability was genuinely fascinating to me. There were various causes for mental trauma and near-infinite ways in which said trauma could influence a person's demeanor and behavior. The opportunity to explore people's weaknesses in the real world was irresistible.
I felt another kick under the table. I stared blankly at Kushida, implicitly demanding an explanation.
"Do you think I didn't hear your pathetic flirting attempt earlier?"
What?
Kushida attempted to look disgusted, but the genuine smile she was looking to hide intermittently revealed itself.
I sighed. Conversations in the outside world were tiring, but they were pleasant to be part of. Something was refreshing about having an honest, open talk without hidden motivations.
I could get used to this, I thought to myself as my attention returned to my food.
I wonder how sushi would taste with twice as much wasabi...
~~~
I studied the foreign substance presented to me.
It was in a cup, the store's logo prominently displayed on it.
Its color was pure white, as white as the snow I had seen in photographs. Its shape was spherical, and its smooth, silken appearance suggested a creamy flavor. To the touch, it was frigid. A flat, wooden spoon accompanied the main delicacy.
My observations were interrupted by someone poking my side. Turning to my side, I was met with the face of Kushida, a soft smile adorning her lips.
"Stop staring so intently. You'll melt it by your gaze alone," Kushida said.
"I'm committing every part of this new experience to memory, that's all."
We were sitting side-by-side on a bench on the mall's second floor. Kushida had suggested going out for dessert, but after sensing my confusion on the topic, she insisted I try a sweet dish named "ice cream." Said dessert came in multiple flavors, with Kushida ordering vanilla for my indecisive self and lemon for herself.
"It's my treat since it's your first time, but you better pay up next time," said Kushida, a glint in her eyes.
"If you say so."
Kushida's words alerted me to the precariousness of my current situation. Depending on how the future unfolded, I could be in a different prefecture or even back in the White Room by this time next week. There was every possibility of there not being a "next time" for Kushida and me. I would have to fight for every next time, every new tomorrow, every day of freedom, but even then, I could not control everything to come. It was thus somewhat prudent to live by the philosophy of there being no tomorrow, to learn all I could before the day of reckoning.
With newfound enthusiasm, I swiftly grabbed the wooden spoon, scooped up a portion of the ice cream, and placed it in my waiting mouth.
A Frozen Explosion. That was what it was. The glacier in my mouth instantly demanded the attention of my taste buds through its cold temperature and burst of flavor. As I had anticipated, the payload was creamy. An understated, almost-floral sweetness flooded my mouth, leaving me in a rare state of speechlessness. My mind cleared due to its iciness and the desire to wholly focus on enjoying this novel taste.
To describe it further was difficult, even for a masterpiece like me. Back in the White Room, meals were bland, neither savory nor sweet. There were exceptions, most notably when I was made to increase my spice tolerance through the consumption of raw chilies, but desserts and other remotely sweet foods were entirely removed from my diet. Thus, analyzing the sweetness was akin to describing color to a blind person. Adjectives such as "floral" and "creamy" naturally came to mind based on what I had read, but in the end, my taste buds innately recognized the ice cream as sweet. In that sense, I was still like any regular human, which relieved me ever-so-slightly for a reason I could not fathom.
One bite became two, two became four, and before I knew it, my cup was empty. Like with the ramen, my hunger was satiated, but my desire was not. How irrational of me. If this weakness was exploited properly, I could end up at someone's beck and call with the promise of enough ice cream. Though, that didn't sound terrible...
Clatter.
My focus was broken. I turned toward the source of the noise. Kushida had dropped her cup, staring at me with widened eyes and a shocked face.
"What happened?" I asked.
"Y-you... you can smile?"
"I was smiling?" I became aware of a strain on my facial muscles. A moment later, my mouth reverted to its apathetic state, presumably because I had finished my ice cream. I also noticed that my smile was the widest it had ever been. Did I enjoy ice cream that much?
"Yeah... you looked very creepy..." Kushida trailed off, averting her gaze.
I wondered why Kushida appeared shocked. For me, that was a surprise, but it was typical to smile in the outside world. Perhaps my smile was crude, a consequence of my choices in the White Room, and it would frighten a regular person.
"I'm sorry for scaring you." I decided to apologize.
"No no, it's all good! I just wasn't expecting it," replied Kushida, who had regained her composure. "Feel free to smile as much as you want! But it does make me a little sad..."
"Why is that?"
Kushida gazed at my feet. Yet again, her eyes glazed over as if she were reminded of an event in her past. "You didn't enjoy our time together, right?"
I sighed. "As I told you earlier, I find expressing myself difficult. I'm just as surprised as you that I smiled."
"It's not normal to be expressionless for that long unless you were super-duper bored," Kushida observed, picking up her empty cup from the ground. "You can be honest with me, Ayanokouji-kun. I won't get mad. It'll be like all those other times, after all..."
This was getting troublesome. I would need to do some damage control.
"You have my word for it," I said, turning my head to face her. "Besides, you introduced me to ice cream, my new favorite food. I'll always be thankful to you for that."
Kushida smiled in response.
We then sat in silence for a few minutes. Contrary to expectations, it was a pleasant silence, a hallmark of my new peaceful life.
"I wouldn't mind meeting up with you again if you're okay with it," I said abruptly. It was a spontaneous statement that exited my lips before I could stop it. Why was that? I never actively sought out companionship in the White Room. Perhaps within my frozen heart, I was lonely. Did my humanity refuse to fade away despite my best efforts? If so, was that acceptable? For every step I took in this unknown world, new questions arose.
"Thank you, Ayanokouji-kun. That means a lot more than you realize." Kushida wiped something from her eye. My statement couldn't have been that profound, right?
"I'll warn you, I am a boring person to interact with," I stated. With a lack of worldly knowledge, there were not many topics I could talk about in-depth.
"I find you quite easy to talk to, actually," shot back Kushida while twirling a strand of hair around her finger.
"You're actually quite nice, Kushida," I commented.
Kushida's face became scary. "Care to elaborate?"
"When I first met you, I thought you were the delinquent type. It's quite unusual for a girl your age to curse, wouldn't you agree?"
I received a light punch to my side.
"Just because we're friends now doesn't mean you can say whatever you want," declared Kushida in a low tone. Friends, huh? Had she known what I had done in the White Room, would she still say the same?
"You were the one who repeatedly called me 'weird' and 'strange,'" I pointed out.
Kushida repeatedly shook her head, clearly annoyed.
"Um, Ayanokouji-kun," said Kushida a few seconds later, her voice laced with caution.
"Yes?"
"You're homeless, aren't you?"
She was observant. I did not go out of my way to hide it, but I was still mildly impressed at her ability to put together the clues left behind to form a larger story.
Now interested, I decided to further probe her knowledge. "What makes you think that?"
"When I told you that filthy gown was unacceptable, you conveniently had a spare set of clothes. I also saw many of your belongings when you took out a towel to dry yourself. Those aren't the items a person coming from home would bring on a normal excursion."
"What if I said I was staying at a friend's house for the night and was simply on my way there when it started raining?"
Kushida snickered. "Your lies are terrible. Who hosts a sleepover on a Sunday night? Besides, that's not consistent with your 'strict parents' narrative."
Bravo, Kushida. I decided to reward her with the truth.
"Then I'll admit to it. I ran away from my parent's house a couple of days ago. Going back isn't an option."
Kushida's eyes softened. "I'm sorry to hear that..."
"Don't be. I request that you don't pry into the details of my life, but I would appreciate it if you could direct me to a place I can sleep tonight."
"Um, there are plenty of homeless shelters. You could definitely find one if you looked around enough."
"It's more likely that I would get found if I stay in one of those." The real reason was that I did not fully trust organizations claiming to be altruistic. With the appropriate measures in place, it would not be any less difficult for that man to track me down if I were in a homeless shelter rather than somewhere else.
"Hmm..." Kushida seemed deep in thought, genuinely looking to help me out. I was intrigued when I read that friends put in the effort to help each other, but seeing it with my own two eyes felt almost surreal. In the White Room, such a concept was foreign. One did whatever it took for their own success and only helped others when it benefitted them. Such a philosophy did not hold true in the outside world, for better or worse.
Kushida seemed to have an epiphany, for a grin formed on her face as she turned toward me.
"There's an old treehouse near my home. Nobody's used it for years, so it should be fine for you to live there. I'll take you there once the rain stops!"
From a source most unexpected, I had secured an essential need.
~~~
"And we're here!"
It had taken a while for the rain to cease, but fortunately, we arrived while the sky was still darkening. I had taken advantage of the intervening time to satiate my curiosity, asking innocuous-sounding questions about Kushida's family, school, and friends to understand her situation better. Unfortunately, I was also subjected to shopping with Kushida, which mostly involved me standing around like a statue while she tried on various articles of clothing.
The bluish-purple sky offered little light, but I could make out a ladder leading to a box-shaped dwelling between two trees. With a corrugated roof, wooden walls, and stable flooring, the treehouse would provide adequate protection against the elements. It lay on undeveloped land at the edge of Kushida's neighborhood, an ideal location for hiding from that man.
"You might have to repair or clean some parts, but it looks mostly good to me!"
"This is beyond my expectations. Thank you, Kushida."
I could not make out her face in the darkness, but I could tell she was smiling brightly.
"I should be thanking you instead, Ayanokouji-kun. I've had a rough past few days, so today was really nice."
"Well, if you ever want to hang out again, you know my home and work addresses."
"I'll definitely take you up on that offer. See you around, Ayanokouji-kun!"
As she made to head back to her house, a memory flashed through my mind. I quickly grabbed Kushida's hand, stopping her from leaving.
"Ayanok—"
"Kushida."
Perhaps noticing the seriousness in my voice, she stopped speaking, gazing at me with expectant eyes.
"You're struggling, aren't you?"
"What do you mean?" She attempted to put up a front, but the slight crack in her voice gave it away.
"I won't ask you anything. But remember one thing: I will always accept you for who you are."
With that, I let go of her hand and made for the treehouse, not bothering to check whether she had left.
I tossed my bags onto the treehouse's balcony, then climbed the ladder leading up to it. A flashlight would have been helpful, but my extensive night vision training was enough for most purposes.
I entered the treehouse and placed my two plastic bags' worth of possessions in a corner. As I thought, it was a musty one-room abode. The place was empty save for a yellowing pillow, a mattress in one corner, and two dusty books. There was also a small window with a tennis ball-sized hole from which I could see the lustrous night sky.
As I began sweeping the floor with my already-dirty white gown, I allowed the memory from earlier to replay in my mind.
"Don't you want to see what's beyond these white walls?"
"I haven't given much thought to it, but not particularly."
"In the real world, you can make friends, go to school, eat whatever you want, play when you want, and more broadly, be free. Doesn't that sound wonderful to you?"
"Not really. I solely want to keep improving myself here. Shouldn't you be thinking the same?"
"You're quite weird, Ayanokouji. Why would you want to stay in this virtual world?"
When I had stopped Kushida, I decided to act like how a friend would because of my batchmate's words. When he had initially told me of the benefits of the outside world, I brushed him off. Now, forced to experience the real world he spoke so highly of, I could begin to understand his words.
Change does not come easy, especially for a heartless person like me. I did not know if I wanted to change or if I even wanted to learn what it meant to be human.
Yet, bit by bit, I was changing. A smile here, some advice there. To any observer, the change would appear minute, but to me, it was almost monumental. That man would call it going soft.
But ultimately, all that change would be for naught. That was how it always ended, after all.
~~~
A/N: Thank you for your patience in waiting for this chapter. I was 80% done with this chapter before Wattpad chose to act up and delete my progress, meaning I had to redo everything.
Not much to say here. The chapter is a bit boring since not much happens, but it does set up for some more exciting chapters later on, so stay tuned for those.
I originally wrote a Kushida blackmail scene similar to those in canon and most fanfics, but upon rewriting, I decided to take advantage of my timeline shift to write a more conflicted Kushida. Hope you still find it enjoyable.
On a slightly unrelated note, which characters would you like to see appear in future chapters? I do plan on hitting all the major characters eventually, but your preferences might help me better plan the next few chapters.
It's getting late, so I'll end this A/N here. If you have any further questions, feel free to ask in the comments. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and I'll see you in the next one!