Eren felt like he had not slept so well in his entire life. His body shifted, and satin sheets slithered with him. He was warm inside and out. Gone was the pain in his head that had plagued him since returning from Maizières-lès-Metz with a concussion. He had no idea what time it was. It felt like it should be almost noon, yet the room was dark. Then he realized there was a faint glow of daylight behind thick drapes.
Best of all, his memories of the night before were crystal clear. He turned his head over on the plump pillow and saw Levi still asleep, his face relaxed, his lips slightly parted, and his black hair a mess. Eren wanted to reach out and run his fingers through the hair, but he dared not wake him.
He lingered, too drowsy to get up. He imagined a life like this, living in comfort, not whispering and fearing a soldier would barge in on them.
"Eren, I say this as your friend. Escape with Levi."
It was so tempting.
It took another ten minutes before Levi stirred, at first just a slow shift out of dreams and into the world of the waking. Then he gasped and jumped as he felt the satin around him, only to sink as he also remembered where he was. He looked over and saw Eren's teal eyes already gazing at him.
His voice raspy and dry, he asked, "How long have you been awake?"
"Not long." Finally, he could reach forward and caress Levi's messy hair. How soft it felt!
"Any nightmares?"
Eren shook his head, smiling as he realized what a relief it was to sleep solidly and wake up without the dark storm of memories. He squirmed around in the satin sheets, giddy to feel such luxury. "I wish we could have breakfast right here."
"We probably could," Levi reasoned. "I'll hide, you go fetch some food. Carly would let you come back here. We still have a few more pears and apples." He had no idea how she got fruit. Everything in Metz was getting locked down, and food was carefully rationed out. Carly must have some powerful connections ... and Levi wondered how many men she had to sleep with just to obtain that bowl of fruit.
"I'll get dressed," said Eren. "Maybe I can find tea or coffee."
"I have tea."
Eren perked up. "You do?"
"I packed that tea tin you bought me for Rosh Hashanah." He leaned on Eren's chest and stroked his hand down the firm torso. "You get food, I'll get tea, and we'll meet back here. I'll hide until you come back. Knock three times on the wall when you return."
Eren wrapped his arms around Levi and held him on top of his chest. "We can wait a little."
Levi scoffed out a laugh. Yes, it was tempting to just skip breakfast and stay in the comfortable bed. He leaned down to give Eren a kiss. He felt those rough, battle-hardened fingers caress down his back, grasp his butt briefly, and then slid back up, feeling along the scars of his back to his shoulders. Levi ran his fingers through Eren's hair, down to his neck, and along the broad, muscular shoulders. Then Eren's arms grabbed him again, a strong and secure hold, like if he squeezed tightly enough, no enemy could ever pull them apart.
Levi saw a wistful darkness in Eren's eyes. He kissed him on the forehead, wishing there was a way to create a world where Eren never had to look so sad.
He leaned over and simply kissed him. It was such a gentle morning kiss, and he saw the worries melt into bliss. Levi kissed him again, letting their lips linger. If Eren wanted a moment of happiness first thing in the morning, Levi would give it to him.
Anything for his takhshet.
Finally, it was Eren who pulled back. "We should eat."
That was all that needed to be said. Levi rolled off. Eren got up and went to the bathroom. He cleaned himself up a bit. As he was shaving, Levi walked in.
"Can I use the toilet?"
Eren motioned for him to go on ahead. He briefly thought about how much trust and comfort it took to share a bathroom together like this.
He finished shaving and stepped back as Levi went to the sink to wash his hands. Then Levi left, and Eren returned to the sink to comb down his hair. He was amused that Carly had fully supplied the sink with anything an officer might need to make himself presentable after a wild night.
When he came back out, he saw Levi was already fully dressed.
"I'll leave now," said Levi.
Eren strode up to him first, wrapped him up in his arms, and gave him a kiss. "I'll be back soon, mein Schätzchen."
"I've told you before, don't call me that."
Eren chuckled and simply leaned over to give Levi another kiss. Then Levi walked over to the nightstand and opened the third drawer. Inside looked like a collection of photographs of naked women. He reached underneath the drawer, and Eren heard him click a switch. Then Levi walked over to the wall, gave it a push, and suddenly a portion of the wall molding cracked open. The wall creaked open, followed by a whiff of cold air.
Eren glanced inside. He ran his hand along the molding, surprised by how clever the secret entrance was. The molding meant that any perceived gap between it and the rest of the wall would be mistaken as just the wood warping up. Inside was a tunnel that led to a staircase. Levi walked inside to a gun placed on the ground, picked it up, returned to Eren, and handed the gun over.
"I'm glad you slept well, but we can hide your gun in here if it helps you."
Eren stowed the Luger back in his holster. "It helped, knowing I can't shoot you."
Levi frowned, truly worried for his mental health.
"What do you want for breakfast?" Eren asked, seemingly not aware that his little confession was anything to be worried about.
"I'm fine with anything." He looked down the dark corridor beyond the false wall, then back to Eren. "Be safe out there."
Eren gave him a final kiss, and Levi carefully swiveled the wall until it locked into place. Eren pressed his hand on the wall, but he had to admit, it felt sturdy and not like it was a secret passage.
He left the room, trotted down the stairs, and saw the messy aftermath of the previous night's party. A few soldiers were just leaving, groggy and stumbling with hangovers. Rather than musicians, there was a gramophone playing some light classical music. Ladies were cleaning up, and even Carly was out there with a broom in her hand.
"Herr Oberleutnant, guten Morgen."
"Guten Morgen," he replied stiffly.
"Looking for breakfast?" She glanced at a clock on the wall. "Or perhaps lunch. Please, bring some food from our kitchen up to your sweetheart."
"It's okay, I can go buy—"
"I insist," she cut in. "I can guarantee that the food I have is fresh. I wouldn't want your sweetheart to get sick on half-spoiled food or military rations."
Eren frowned, but he figured she had a point. There was no way to guarantee how fresh the army's food stocks were.
Carly called out in Russian to a girl, who waved Eren to follow her. She led him through some hallways to a massive kitchen. Eren glanced around and realized two of the cooks had dark skin.
Was Carly sheltering African people as well as the French Resistance?
Luckily, one of the chefs spoke some basic German, enough to figure out that Eren wanted two meals. Soon the smell of sizzling eggs and sautéing onions and mushrooms filled the air. He was also offered a cup of real coffee as he waited.
Eren sipped the coffee and glanced around. For a brothel, he had not expected to see a kitchen that was so well stocked, with copper pots, pans, ladles, and kettles hanging from the walls. A massive stove took up most of the room, with chefs moving around the multiple ovens, some baking bread that filled the air with a heady aroma.
Shelves were lined with copper and ceramic containers full of spices, flour, and rare white sugar—Eren wondered how Carly could have possibly obtained that with the embargoes and rations. Braided garlands of garlic and fresh herbs hung upside down from hooks. Sacks of potatoes, each big as a child, were piled up in the corner.
As he sat there, a cat walked up and rubbed against his ankle. Eren reached down to pet it.
"I bet you keep the mice away from all this food," he whispered, scratching the cat under the chin.
He had just finished his cup of coffee when a copper tray was presented to him.
"I can carry it to your room, sir," the German-speaking chef offered.
"I can get—"
"I insist."
Eren was stunned. Why yet another insist? Was this a way to deliver a secret message to Levi? If so, perhaps he should simply let Carly run things her own way, especially if she was going to all this trouble just to help out him and Levi.
"Bring a kettle of hot water."
The lady smiled to herself. "For Levinia's tea?"
Eren was about to ask who Levinia was, until he recalled that this was the name Levi went by when dressed as a woman. So, this chef really did know about who he had spent the night with. Yet she smiled with a glimmer in her eyes, like she was truly happy for him.
The lady got a kettle that was already on the stove and placed it on the tray. Eren turned and went back up the stairs, hearing the tray rattling behind him. He supposed, at least this way, he wouldn't accidentally drop the tray and ruin the food.
He returned to the room and opened the door. The chef followed him in, glanced around, but seemed unconcerned that no one else was in the room. Again, Eren wondered if this was common knowledge. Maybe the entire staff were in on Carly's scheme.
Or maybe, being African and thus persecuted by Nazis, this lady simply saw two souls who were in a similar situation as herself.
After she set the tray on the table, the lady took a bow and left. Eren locked the door and walked up to the false wall. He knocked, and a soft voice called out.
"Qui est là?" Who's there?
"It's me," Eren said, his mouth to the wall.
Suddenly, the whole thing opened, and Levi had a knife in his hand. Upon seeing Eren was alone, he relaxed and sheathed it.
"I wasn't expecting you back so soon, and I thought I heard someone with you."
"One of the chefs. Madame Carly insisted I use her food, and the cook insisted she bring it up to us. She seemed to know you, or at least Levinia."
"Shit," Levi whispered, and he trudged out. "I fucking hate that they started to call me that, and Carly gets a goddamn laugh out of it every time."
He checked the tray, lifted the plates, then flipped over the napkins. Under one, he found a tiny rolled up note, like a miniature scroll. Eren watched as Levi read it, and he frowned.
So, it really was a way to hide a secret message.
"Putain de salope de merde!" Levi suddenly cursed, and he crumpled the letter up.
"Bad news?"
"I wish! That bitch went through all this just to leave me a message hoping my night was fun." He cursed some more and slouched down at the table.
Eren also took a seat. "Was it?"
Levi glanced up at him, and for a brief moment it looked like he might smile. Instead, he purposely scowled. "I slept well, at least."
Eren was amused by his stubbornness. "And everything else?"
Levi scowled harder. He pulled out his tea tin and scooped dried leaves out into the steaming water. Quietly, he muttered, "It ... was good."
That soft confession was enough to make Eren's heart burst. "Do you think she would let me come back every night?"
"From what she told me, it sounded like that was her plan. You may need to pay, just to keep up appearances."
"It's worth it!" he insisted. "Besides, it costs money to clean up the sheets."
Levi cursed and looked away in humiliation.
Eren laughed and reached across the table to hold his hand. "Would you want me to come back every night?"
"Do what you want."
"I want to know what you want."
Slowly, Levi's gaze turned regretful. "There may be nights when I'm ... busy."
The warmth in Eren suddenly went cold. Obviously, he meant missions for the French Resistance. "I see. I guess ... let me know when those nights are, and I won't come here."
Levi glanced up at him with doubt. "Would you warn the Gestapo to increase security?"
"I wouldn't do anything to put you in danger."
Levi slowly nodded. "Sorry for asking."
Eren pouted, but he supposed it was fair to ask after how he had reacted last time.
After a minute of awkward silence, Levi muttered, "Just so you know, if I find out some other Resistance cell is planning something that could put you in danger, I would warn you."
That surprised Eren. "Really?"
"They can go kill some other Germans. I won't let them hurt you."
Eren's smile was only halfhearted. He still did not like the idea that Levi was in charge of a group who targeted his fellow soldiers, but at least he was still trying to look out for him.
"Let's not talk about this," Eren whispered.
"Tea," Levi insisted. He poured out cups for both of them, stirred in some sugar, and took a sip. Bliss melted on his face.
Eren cheered up seeing that simple pleasure. He sipped his own tea and also felt warmth seeping into every muscle. Finally, the smell of the omelet in front of him was too tempting, so he grabbed a fork and dug in hungrily. Levi also ate, and soon the sound of silverware clanking on china plates played through the room.
"Do you have anything going on today?" asked Levi.
Eren shook his head and swallowed down a bite. "It's Sunday. I gave my men the day off. I figured they'd want to pray."
"Do you?" asked Levi. "I'd understand if you want to go and pray for the men you lost. It's normal in times like these. Prayer can help the heart to heal."
Eren had to admit, he had planned to do just that, but now he did not want to be apart from Levi. Their time together was so rare, so precious.
"Come to church with me," he blurted out.
Levi froze, and slowly he looked up. "What?"
"Church. That's the word, right? Kirsch is church in English, yes?"
"Yes," Levi muttered. "You want me ... to go to church?"
Eren suddenly felt a spike of fear. Was this offensive? After all, Levi was Jewish. "It's not like I want you to become Christian. I just thought ... I thought ... the architecture is nice. I went to the cathedral. The—what do you call them—Buntglasfenster—color window? The glass, the windows, they are like pictures."
"Stained-glass window," Levi answered.
"Maybe you can pray, and it will help you as well. You act strong, but I know you hurt from all you lost."
Levi grumbled, "I doubt that gazing at the image of a dying Messiah is going to help."
Eren frowned and lowered his head.
Levi sighed, knowing why Eren would ask him to come, and he had to admit, he would not mind spending a day with Eren. "Do your men still think your wife is here?"
"I haven't told them about that, but the officers from the hotel think so."
"Well, I won't melt if I enter a Christian church, and it would be nice to get some fresh air. This whole building reeks of perfume, even the basement."
Eren perked up. "Then you'll come?"
How could he possibly say no to that face? "I'll grab my disguise."
* * *
Levi had walked past Saint-Étienne Cathedral many times, gazing upon the massive building that dominated the Metz skyline, but he never bothered to step inside. Now, dressed up with the blond wig and Eren by his side, he walked into the church and glanced around in awe.
Gothic arches soared above. Hundreds of stained glass windows made for an ethereal experience. Although this was not his religion, Levi had to admit that he was impressed with how Catholics tried to recreate what they thought Heaven looked like.
If it looked anything like this, he hoped that maybe forgiveness and salvation were not completely out of reach for a man like him.
Eren leaned in close to his ear to whisper. "The last time I was here was my first Sunday in Metz. Feels like half a lifetime ago."
Levi merely hushed him. Speaking English here, even within the sanctuary of the Church, was far too dangerous.
Eren walked into the nave, where chairs were set out in rows. He took a seat and folded his hands to pray.
Levi continued to gawk around, trying to figure out which biblical scenes the stained glass portrayed. Some, he thought he recognized, but he had to admit, he only knew about a few characters specifically relevant to Christians. Christ himself, of course. There was his mother Mary, he knew she was pretty important, although besides being a virgin when she gave birth to an overachiever, he was not sure what she did. As for the saints, he knew the names of a few only because locations around Europe were named after them, but he had no idea how they played into the whole Messiah story.
He glanced back over to Eren, still deeply focused in prayer. Levi thought about all the times Eren stood by his side as he worshiped, from that Spring day when Eren managed to give the Jews some extra hot food and a free moment to read the Tanakh to Shavuot and sing, standing to the side, watching them, not with annoyance or disgust, but curiosity, even if it was only an exotic inquisitiveness. Still, it was with a level of acceptance that few Jews in Europe received.
Then, Eren even joined in with Rosh Hashanah, and he went out of his way to help Levi observe Yom Kippur, even when the pain of their impending separation had made Levi's resolve a true agony of the heart.
Levi looked ahead at the altar. Although some of the men of this religion wanted him dead, it was not the religion itself that wanted to kill Jews. It was merely how a handful of powerful people misinterpreted scripture to justify their own bigotry.
Many priests had helped Levi along the way. All across German-occupied lands, priests had been arrested, even executed, for hiding Jews. Some Christians turned against their neighbors for daring to be different, while others gave their lives to save someone from a completely different religion.
Perhaps those were the true Christians.
He thought about Rabbi Raffi, striding out to the Catholic priest who was already under arrest, all so Levi and the others could escape. He wondered what became of the priest who hid them, if he was still alive. He wondered if somehow, beyond all hope, Rabbi Raffi was still alive, living in one of those camps, perhaps still giving hope to others. It was unlikely, but not impossible.
He wondered what happened to the women that Sasha, Krista, and Ymir had helped to escape. Were they already in safer countries? Could they recover from the horrors?
Levi closed his eyes, and he offered his own prayers. He thought of the Christians who helped him, families who gave over their homes, and the average citizens who knew what he was yet still took the act of aiding him as a duty to a fellow Frenchman, a fellow human. He prayed for them, to all the people who helped in little ways.
He prayed for those Resistance ladies who risked their lives—and even died—to save them. He prayed for those Luxembourger priests, Father Uri in Fischbach who offered him food, shelter, and when Levi insisted on moving along before the German army arrived, Uri gave him a hat and directions to the next church; poor Deacon Ulklin in Buerglënster, who was shot trying to protect Mina Carolina. He prayed for that young girl too, who learned he was Jewish yet risked her life to warn him that the Nazis were coming.
He prayed for Jean and Armin for being supportive of Eren, even when they were not sure why their commanding officer would prefer a male companion. Grudgingly, he also prayed for Yelena; at the very least, he hoped she might survive whatever the Gestapo had planned for her.
He felt a hand touch his, looked down, and saw the hand with a gold ring. That ring was so close to the pearl ring Levi wore as part of his disguise.
He realized that he didn't have to wear that ring. He liked wearing it. It was a ring Eren had given him, looking adorably nervous as he did. He gripped Eren's hand and gazed up at him.
Silently, with the kaleidoscope light of the cathedral pouring down onto them, he offered a prayer to God to look after Eren and heal his soul.
Eren leaned in close to his ear. "Let's look around."
They got up and strolled through the cathedral, gazing up at the windows and the elaborate architecture. Eren talked softly in German to him at times, but Levi understood none of it. The words didn't matter.
Then a man in a Gestapo uniform walked up to Eren, and there was a priest with him. They spoke in German, and Levi watched cautiously. Who was this Gestapo agent? Were they in trouble?
However, Eren's voice sounded light. He laughed, and Levi forced up a demure smile, hiding his confusion. He had to act now.
"Hier geht's lang, mein Schätzchen." This way, my darling.
Levi followed, not wanting to give any of these men an excuse to talk directly to him. After all, it seemed like Eren was purposely diverting the conversation away from him.
They walked to an alcove, and the young Gestapo agent waved a farewell. The priest unlocked a door and led Eren and Levi up a spiraling staircase. Levi stared hard at Eren, but he looked excited.
Was this a tour of the inside of the cathedral? Perhaps it was safer, far away from the regular visitors.
He traveled up a narrow passage. He was honestly shocked at the lack of space. Definitely, this was meant for people who worked in the church. How far they went up, he had no idea, but finally they came to another door that the priest unlocked for them. Levi was momentarily blinded by sunlight. He stepped out, and his mouth dropped.
Eren was right behind him, and he looked excited as they gazed out at a bird's-eye view of Metz.
(The view of Metz from the roof of the Cathedral)
Eren turned to the priest. "Can you give us ten minutes of privacy?"
He looked hesitant. "I don't recommend it."
"Please. This view is so holy, so inspiring, I want a moment to pray."
That seemed to placate him. "Five minutes. Do be careful of the ledge."
"I will keep my beloved safe, I swear."
The priest went back through the door, and now Eren and Levi were alone, high above the rest of the world. The spires around them seemed to be a divine barrier between them and the rest of the world.
"The man earlier is the Gestapo agent who spoke with me back when we bought your tea. Yesterday, I went to him to file a report."
Sheer terror spiked through Levi for a moment. "Why?" He just barely refrained from screaming the word.
"About Hauptmann Woermann, my captain. He's faking an injury to get out of the battle. Colt was just telling me that he's been spoken to and will be punished by being sent to the front lines."
"And you?" he asked.
Eren shook his head. "I asked for a—what is it called—Versetzung. Going to another captain."
"A transfer?"
"Colt said it should be finalized tomorrow."
Levi felt the terror fade. "You'll be getting away from that bastard. Good. I hope they sit him right in front of Patton's tanks with a giant target on his chest."
"As a way to thank me for my service to the Gestapo, Colt told the Priester to let me see this view." Eren walked to the edge and gazed out. "I must say, it's quite a way to thank a man."
Levi walked up beside him. It truly was something that tugged at his heart. Levi had seen the cellars, sewers, and attics of Metz, the trash-lined damp alleys with black mold growing on limestone walls and rats scurrying about. Up here, he saw what he was truly fighting for.
France, in all its glory!
Eren turned to Levi. "I'm glad I could share this with you. I want to share more. I wish I could give you every beautiful view, every sunset."
Levi's brow tightened. "Eren..."
Then, up here, far closer to heaven than any of those people praying down below, Eren grabbed both of Levi's hands. In a rush, he boldly gave an oath, up here and before God.
"Du bedeutest alles für mich! Dein Lächeln ist das, was ich jeden Tag und jede Nacht sehen möchte. Ich werde alles tun, um sicherzustellen, dass dieses Lächeln erhalten bleibt. Alle deine Probleme sind meine und mein ganzes Glück gehört dir. Ich verspreche, ich werde dich glücklich und sicher halten. Ich verspreche, dich zu beschützen, auch wenn die ganze Welt auseinander fällt. Ich verspreche dir, dich zu lieben, solange ich lebe. Alles was ich will ist dein Versprechen, bei mir zu bleiben, mein zu sein, für immer!"
Levi scowled. "It's not fair when you tell me things in German. You know I don't understand you. If you want to say it, tell me in a way I understand!"
"I'm not sure you want to hear it."
"If you're insulting me, I'll kick your arse later."
Eren chuckled softly. Then he took Levi's hand, raised it until the pearl ring gleamed, and said solemnly, "You mean everything to me! Your smile is what I want to see every day and every night. I will do everything I can to make sure that smile lasts. All your problems are mine, and all my happiness is yours."
Eren raised Levi's hand and planted a chaste kiss. In a soft, reverent whisper, he continued:
"I promise I will keep you happy and safe. I promise to protect you even if the whole world falls apart. I promise to love you—"
"Eren!"
He forced on, "All I want is your promise to stay with me, to be mine, forever—"
"Don't!" Sharp eyes stared up to him, and Eren felt a slight tremble in Levi's hands. "Don't make promises like that. Nothing but death is forever. Whether through war or sickness or dumb bad luck, we all die. You and I, we have it worse. We could be killed for simply existing."
"Then I'll love you until I die," he declared.
"Don't talk about dying. It'll bring misfortune."
"You brought it up first! I know life can be short. I know that way too well! But I don't plan to die in this war. I plan to live, and to search for you. I'll find you, even if it takes me years. So wait for me." He squeezed Levi's hand and rubbed over the ring. "That's all I ask for. Wait for me."
Levi sighed, and he placed his hand over Eren's so that their rings clinked. "I will, but not forever."
Eren pulled back, looking hurt; however, Levi had a secretive smile.
"For as long as we both shall live."
Eren's face burst into a grin of intense love. "Solange wir beide leben werden." Eren squeezed Levi's hand. "It's my oath to you before God."
Levi scoffed, but his eyes twinkled. "Those people down there," he said, nodding under their feet, "believe that God would strike us down for this."
Eren glanced up at the clouds. "I hear no thunder, no lightning striking us, no voices from Heaven." He smiled down at Levi. "I don't think God cares who you love, so long as you love."
His eyes focused on those thin lips. Levi began to lift his head and lower his eyes, expecting the kiss already. Eren leaned down, but then he paused, smiled playfully, and whispered, "May I kiss you?"
"Shut up. I'll never say no to you. Never."
Levi tiptoed up, and their lips met to seal the oath.
# # #
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Happy New Year 2023, and happy 3rd anniversary to Dangerous Territory. These two truly have come so far, and I am so thrilled that the New Year landed on this chapter in particular. (Not planned!)
Secret tunnels — I did probably too much research into different realistic ways people hide secret rooms or tunnels. I'm way too influenced by Hollywood, and I realized my original idea was something out of James Bond. One style that was used way back in the 1700s by French kings, and is still used today, is to hide the door with wall molding. For non-Native English readers, "molding" (or "moulding" for Brits) is a decorative raised trim used on walls, doors, or around windows, usually made of plaster or wood, although modern materials like polystyrene foam, medium-density fiberboard, or PVC trim make this decoration once reserved for the elite now slightly more affordable.
"last time I was here" — Eren's visit to Saint-Étienne Cathedral was on Sunday, 10 September 1944 (Chapter 31). It is now the 5th of November, so almost two months.
I credit this video with the idea of Eren and Levi climbing up to the roof of the cathedral. Today, you can go up there as part of a paid tour. The video is in French, but I watched it with YouTube's English translation turned on. (Which is laughably bad, but it's enough to get the gist of what they're visiting around the cathedral and some of the history of the architecture.)
Mooning Men of Metz — I posted a bunch of pictures of the Cathedral back in Chapter 31 "Clarity in the Cathedral," but there's one little detail easily missed that I found hilarious. Just under the course of the triforium are about 180 culs-de-lampe (corbels in English, culots in French). Most are animals, demons, or people on their knees...
Except for one naughty little culot giving us a Goatse. (It's the closest one to the bishop's seat, too!)
(Two culs-de-lampe praying to God, one praying you eat his ass)
That same image of a man bending over, pulling his butt cheeks apart, and mocking the viewer by sticking his tongue out at them from between the legs, is also found near the German Gate.
It seemed to be a playful motif that was popular for a brief time as Europeans tended to "moon" each other as a common mockery. Mooning men can be found in England, France, Italy, and more. I'm curious if there's a deeper meaning, and why on earth that image would be inside a church. They're found with church gargoyles, with the waterspout shooting out the anus for a delightfully vivid imagery, but that's believed to emphasize that outside the church is sin and debauchery, while inside the church is grace and purity.
So, why is the Metz Cathedral's mooning man near the bishop? Did he forget to pay the stonemason? (That's honestly a reason why one in the UK exists!) In any case, it's a funny detail for the cathedral.