In the vision that Yulus had cast onto the wall of his audience chamber, the mage's crock blew up. Rusty nails and scraps of iron went everywhere, shredding the eelgrass that carpeted the riverbed.
Yulus winced. That eelgrass was home to a lot of fish and shrimp, not just mortal ones but also younger spirits. Well, had been home.
Balanced on her tail next to him, Nagi tsked. "Mages. Always so violent."
Thank goodness she didn't have that when she came here, Yulus was thinking to himself. Out loud, he said, "According to Densissimus Imber, the mage drew inspiration from the rock macaque demons she met in the Jade Mountains."
"Ugh."
The water churned. Ten of the aforementioned rock macaque demons were diving into the river, cheeks bulging. They swam into a loose semi-circle around Lord Silurus' catfish hole and started spitting acorns into it. Densissimus Imber had explained that they planned to enrage him into coming out.
Unfortunately, not all of the demons had good aim. Some of the acorns ricocheted off the edges of the hole and plowed into the riverbed. When the first squad exhausted their cheeks of acorns, they pumped their arms and legs and swam back up, to be relieved by a fresh squad with more poorly-aimed acorns. Black sand and bits of eelgrass swirled through the water.
On either end of the zone that Captains Carpa and Carpio had cleared, the shrimp guards were tapping their feet nervously. Captain Carpa swam in a tight, agitated circle, while Captain Carpio leaned forward, straining to catch every detail. He was so obsessed with the steel-like acorns that he didn't notice a mortal catfish stray past him.
Yulus gasped. Nagi hissed.
One instant, there was a plump, silvery fish. The next – a cloud of blood and flesh churned where the fish had been.
"That fool! That big, blustering fool! You have one job! To keep our people safe!" Nagi shouted at Captain Carpio's image on the wall.
Well, technically, that had been a mortal fish, not a "person," but if it had been a spirit, that would have been a diplomatic disaster. As the ruler of this river, he'd have had to demand redress from the coalition, which he'd really prefer not to.
More worryingly, since Lord Silurus still wasn't coming out, Black Sand Creek spirits were getting bolder and crowding behind the shrimp guards to watch rock macaques spit acorns into his hole.
"Yeah! Get 'im!" cheered a loach.
"Ha! Take that, monster!" jeered a goby.
"Not so brave now, are you!" shouted a carp, cupping his fins around his mouth.
The shrimp guards tapped their feet and shrilled over and over, "Please stay back, please stay back. Do not get too close. It is dangerous."
The onlookers would drift back a couple feet, only to surge forward again at the next wave of acorns. Some were even settling down in the eelgrass as if they were watching a play. Crab vendors began to circulate, selling snacks.
Yulus was getting a bad feeling about all of this.
Den had cast a vision in the air so we could see what was happening underwater. Unlike Yulus' visions, which were full color and transmitted sound, Den's had only shades of greenish-blue and was a little blurry, as if we were squinting through the water of a murky pond. It didn't have sound either. Three-quarters of a year in the Wilds had increased his power, but not enough to catch up to Yulus' centuries of life, it appeared.
I made a mental note, then promptly forgot about it.
The heads of the second squad of rock macaque demons were breaking the surface of the river.
"WELL?" bellowed Captain Rock from his position high on the riverbank.
The squad leader shook himself off and called back, "Not yet, sir!"
"THIRD SQUAD, GO!" Captain Rock ordered, and ten more rock macaques splashed into the river.
Back by the supply wagons, Mistress Jek was helping Floridiana inspect the crocks of knock-out smoke. The seals that prevented them from breaking had been stamped back in the Wilds, and we had to make sure that the crocks didn't fail and poison our own troops before we could use them on Lord Silurus. (After we'd used them on Lord Silurus – well, who cared about a few demons more or less?)
Lord Magnissimus stamped and pawed the ground, making it quake. Those around him staggered. "Whyyyy is it taking so loooong?"
"Lord Silurus is a clever beast," answered Sir Gil. "If he weren't, don't you think we'd have killed him by now?"
The rock macaques in earshot gasped and averted their eyes, clearly expecting the wild boar to bite off the human's head.
Lord Magnisissmus must have seen Sir Gil's point, though. "Huuuumph. I'm getting huuuungry."
Come on, come on, come on. I stared at the entrance to Lord Silurus' lair, solid navy blue in Den's vision, and tried to will the demon to come out. What self-respecting demon hides at the bottom of his hole while lesser beings spit nuts at him?
Stripey eyeballed me. "Maybe we should have you go down there and taunt him until he comes out."
I snorted. Yeah, sure.
"That's a good idea!" boomed Captain Rock.
Sir Gil seconded at once, "Yes, he's a demon! He hates Heaven! He'll come out for sure if he knows that an Emissary from Heaven is here!" The knight's eyes blazed with the belief that a Heaven-sent entity could do anything.
It made me very, very glad that Bobo was back at Honeysuckle Croft, babysitting Taila and her brothers. She'd have agreed with him and sent me to my death out of an overabundance of faith.
I fixed Sir Gil with a cold stare. You would belittle the gods and goddesses by using their Emissary as bait?
"You doooo have the faaaavor of the gods," pointed out Lord Magnissimus, who bore no greater love or reverence for Heaven than Lord Silurus presumably did. "Iiiit will protect yoooou."
"The gods are the ones who demanded we attack at once." Captain Rock loomed over Stripey and me. I prodded the duck, urging him to fly higher. "We needed more time, but you ordered us to fight right now."
If we'd proceeded according to our original timetable, we'd only have had another three days to prepare anyway, so I didn't know what he was complaining about.
Heaven will not tolerate such insults! I snapped.
Den, who'd been monitoring the battle, spoke up on my behalf. "Let's wait a little longer. I'm sure he'll come out soon."
So we did, while Squad Three expended its acorns and swapped with Squad One again.
"We're gonna run out of acorns! This isn't working! You've got to send her in!" Captain Rock stomped over to Den and waved his hairy arms.
The little dragon chewed his lip and considered me. I didn't know how he'd been acknowledged as the supreme commander for this operation, but he hadn't been such a bad choice.
Until now.
Even before he opened his jaws, I knew what he was going to say. "Captain Rock, please have a squad of your best soldiers accompany the Emissary into the river."
What? You're a dragon king! You're actually going to insult Heaven this way?
"Oh, Den, I don't know if that's a good idea," Floridiana called. Her expression was distinctly distrustful. As if I might switch sides now and betray them all! "If we run out of acorns, we do have pebbles and rocks."
The nearby rock macaques made faces. Apparently they didn't like the mouthfeel of anything that wasn't acorns.
Den glanced at the position of the sun and the lengthening shadows across the dry grass. "Ammunition isn't the problem. Sunlight is. We're running out of daylight hours, and most of our troops do not have good night vision."
"That's what the cat spirits are for," Stripey pointed out, and I felt a surge of gratitude: one demon standing up for another. "I thought the whole point of holding them in reserve is so they can serve as our 'eyes' once the sun goes down."
It had taken a lot of negotiations with Master Gravitas before he would put his people into danger. He'd agreed only after Baron Claymouth dismissed all the complaints brought against the colony by cat-hating humans.
Den shook his head. "The cats are our last resort. It'll be nowhere near as effective as fighting when all of the soldiers can see what they're doing. Emissary, the success of this operation is of great importance to you, is it not?"
Well, yes. It was.
It was the final, crucial piece, the keystone in my plan to win enough karma to advance to Black Tier, help Stripey and the duck demons redeem themselves for all their banditry, and appease Aurelia. I didn't need another vengeful Star messing with my reincarnations. Plus the humans here were terrible at keeping their children (and themselves) from getting eaten by Lord Silurus! I didn't trust any of them to babysit properly, and Taila needed to stay alive so she could attend school and grow up to be a – well, whatever she decided to be. Maybe a mage, maybe not. But an adult, for sure.
And for all that to happen, Lord Silurus had to die.
All right. Fine. Let's do this.
So now I was back outside Lord Silurus' lair, paddling with my legs to keep the current from sweeping me downstream. Ten rock macaques, whom Captain Rock swore were "my best men" even though half of them were female, formed a loose ring around me, acorns and short swords at the ready. Above us bobbed the webbed feet and rounded undersides of the duck demons, ready to extract me if necessary.
A head broke the water: Stripey checking up on me.
I nodded at him. Ready.
The rock macaques puffed up their cheeks.
Steeling myself, I yelled, Silurus! Hey, you! Silurus!
I held my breath, but there was no motion in the depths of the cave.
Did you die at last? Is that why you're not coming out to feed? All these delicious, delicious monkeys out here, and they even come with their own stuffing. Nuts. Acorns from the finest oaks in the Jade Mountains!
The rock macaques were eyeing me sidelong, unsure whether they should feel very insulted and abandon me to die when the demon came out. I winked at them. Their expressions firmed, their shoulders squared, and they faced the lair once more.
Or – could it be that you're scared of...THE MAGE? I mean, Yulus is terrified of her. He lost to her before, you know. She beat his guards and got all the way to the audience chamber of the Black Sand Creek Water Court.
If Yulus and Nagi were watching this, they'd be gnashing their teeth. Well, too bad for them. If they didn't want to be included in my insults, then they should have come out on my side.
It's too bad, Silurus. You had your chance to learn how to earn good karma. But you chose to murder the one who offered you that knowledge instead. And now you're going to die. It's far too late for you to start earning good karma now, so you're going to reincarnate as a leech or a tapeworm. What a shame. Six hundred years of life, and that's what you come to. Reincarnation as a creature that lives in the guts of humans and never sees the light of day. Should have thought ahead, shouldn't you –
Whoosh.
A wave of water roared out of the hole and smashed into us. The rock macaques were knocked topsy turvy, while I got flung backwards head over shell. As I tumbled, I glanced up. The ducks had vanished. Whew.
A steel whisker lashed out, looped around the pair of rock macaques, and reeled them in. They struggled and hacked uselessly at the whiskers with their belt knives.
Lord Silurus tossed them into his mouth and bit down.
Green blood stained the water.
A/N: Thanks to my awesome Patreon backers, BananaBobert, Blacklark57, Celia, Charlotte, Hookshyu, James, Lindsey, Michael, and Anonymous!