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[Readers]
Nineteen
Nine- nine- nineteen
Nine- nine- nineeen
[JKR]
Nineteen ninety-two
How does the b-stard orphan, newbie wizard decorated war vet
Unite Hogwarts through more points?
Fight the other founding houses 'til he has to forfeit?
Have it all, lose it all
You ready for more yet?
Gryffindor, second year, Dumbledore's the headmaster
Every British n' Scottish experiment sets a precedent
Not so fast, someone came along to resist him
Pissed him off until we had a plot-twistin' system
You haven't met him yet, you haven't had the chance
'Cause he's been "kickin' ass" as the famous wizard to France
But someone's gotta keep the Hogwarts' promise
You simply must meet Gilderoy, Gilderoy!
[Fangirls]
Gilderoy Lockhart's coming home~
[Random dudes]
Gilderoy Lockhart's coming home
[Fangirls]
Gilderoy Lockhart's coming home
[Random dudes]
Gilderoy Lockhart's coming home
[All]
Gildroy Lockart's coming home-!
Merlin, he's been off in Paris for so long
Aaa-ooo~
Aaa-ooo~
[Lockhart]
Beauxbatons is following us to revolution
There is no more status quo
But the sun comes up and the world still spins
I helped Madame Maxime draft a declaration
Then I said, "I gotta go!"
I gotta be in Hogwarts school
Now the work at home begins
[Fangirls]
Aaa-ooo~
[Lockhart]
So what'd I miss?
What'd I miss?
Hogwarts, my home sweet home, I wanna give you a kiss
*Mwaah*
I've been in Paris meeting lots of different ladies
I guess I basically missed the late eighties
I traveled the wide, wide world and came back to this
[Fangirls]
Aaa-ooo~
[Lockhart]
There's a letter on my desk from the Headmaster
Haven't even put my bag down yet-!
Sally be a lamb, darlin' won'tcha open it?
It says the Headmaster's assembling a cabinet
And that I am to be the professor of DADA, great!
And that I'm already ministry-approved
I just got home and now I'm headed up to Hogwarts
[Fangirls]
Headin' to Hogwarts
Headin' to Hogwarts!
[Lockhart]
Lookin' at the rolling fields I can't-
[Lockhart + fangirls]
-Believe that we are free!
[Lockhart]
Ready to face, whatever's awaiting-
[Lockhart + fangirls]
-Me in the wizard schooling!
[Lockhart]
But who's waitin' for me when I step in the place?
My friend Severus Snape, red in the face
He grabs my arm
And I respond, "What's goin' on?"
[Snape]
Gilderoy, we are engaged in a battle for our schools very soul
Can you get us out of the mess we're in?
[Fangirls]
Aaa-ooo~
[Snape]
Dumbledore's new grand plan is nothing less than ministry control
I've been fighting for the school alone
Where have you been?
[Lockhart]
Uh France, wha?
[Fangirls]
Aaa-ooo~
[Snape (sharply)]
We have to win!
[Lockhart]
Well,
What'd I miss??
[Fangirls]
What'd what'd what'd I miss?
[Lockharts]
What'd I miss?
[Fangirls]
I've come home for this
[Lockhart]
Headfirst into a political abyss!
[Fangirls]
Headfirst, into the abyss
[Lockhart]
I have my first lesson meeting today
[Fangirls]
Chik-a-pow!
[Lockhart]
I guess I better think of something to say-
HAH!
I'm already on my way get to the bottom of this
[Students]
What did I miss?
Aa-ooo~!
[Dumbledore]
Mister Lockhart, welcome home
[McGonagall]
Mister Lockhart,
Welcome back to Hogwarts
[Dumbledore + Students]
Mister Lockhart, welcome home~!
[Everyone]
GIlderoy Lockhart, welcome-
Home, sir, you've been off in Paris for so-
LONG!
[Lockhart]
So what did I miss?
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Fanart credit: feliciacano
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A/N - We all hate this character, and I feel like I'm disrespecting the song, but it kinda fits him! I just realize that I misspelled his name a lot... it's supposed to be "Gilderoy", not "Gildroy".
Thanks for tuning in, and hope you will have a great day. Stay safe as always and remember to take care of yourselves.
God Bless <3