"Come on, Alpha Waverider, you almost made it," Isa tells me, in her ever-encouraging tone.
There are a hundred degrees of mastery between my almost and actually managing to disperse the fog curtain that hovers mockingly in front of me. Since five minutes.
"Luna, you are a more demanding teacher than the Master Healer herself," I whine frustrated, letting my arm hang to my side.
"Try one more time," Isa asks. "If you do, I'll show you something nice."
She's so kind, my Luna. But as I already told her, flashing her boobs at me is a counterproductive distraction. Ignoring my frown, she smiles and reaches for the edge of her shirt.
The fabric is nicely taught over a round belly in which our pup has been living happily for almost five months now.
Now we laugh, but the day we found out about it we didn't laugh at all.
***
I came back from a long raid with my brothers only to find my mate crying over two white sticks.
Beta Nura was sitting next to her with a desperate look on her face. When I am away, she and Knox are responsible with their lives for Isa's well-being. Based on the way my mate was sobbing, she was obviously unwell.
I would have lounged at the Beta to remind her with claws of her duties, but she was carrying her first pup.
"Why are you crying, Isa?" I asked, hugging my mate tightly, but she just shrank into me, unable to speak. "Nura, why is our Luna crying?"
The Beta bowed, long ebony locks storming over her face, and pointed with a shaky finger to the sticks on the table.
"What are these?"
"Human pregnancy tests. Luna Gia sent them to us claiming that they are more accurate than a Lycan's male senses," Nura whispered and added ashamed: "Isa and I thought to try two of them for fun, just to see if they really work..."
I glanced at the two plastic bars on the table, which looked identical, to the last detail. They both had a little dent crossed by two red lines.
"And you are upset that they obviously don't?" I raised Isa's chin, to comfort her with a kiss. "What are they supposed to show?"
"Two lines pup, one line no pup," she smoothed the piece of paper she had been abusing in her hand and waved it in front of me.
"Impossible. We were careful," I said, taking the leaflet and cursing my appalling reading skills. I glanced over the pictures and then I eyed suspiciously the contraptions that competed with my Lycan abilities. I picked them up and twisted them in my hand, not really knowing what I was looking for.
"They are broken," I concluded. "Or you ladies must have done it wrong."
"Maybe we did. Although I don't really know how. We peed on them and everything," Isa huffed. Luckily, she didn't see how I dropped the plastic devices back on the table, because she was too busy drying her tears.
The salty scent dispersed, making room for the familiar honey one.
It did have a faint citrusy note I had smelled before. And I hugged her a little tighter and inhaled a little bit longer until I was sure I could accept defeat in front of the human-made baby finder.
I didn't have to say it out loud, Isa probably guessed it from the crazy speed at which my heart was thudding, happiness and concern messing with its rhythm.
"But we were careful!" she whined, echoing what I had said a minute before, and then she gasped, and then she leaned her forehead against my chest whispering guiltily:
"Except after your birthday."
For my twenty-first birthday, Isa organized a massive party. She plundered her first strawberry crop to make a flour-free dessert, Eino came with a bunch of meat from his lands and Sven brought a weak joint because he was trying to quit. I hadn't smoked in months and the two drags I took almost put me to sleep. Almost, because apparently, I did other things.
"I told you I will go shower and you wanted to join, but I was just finishing my days," Isa tried to jog my memory.
"Aha."
"Yes, yes, you made exactly that sound and I sighed and said fine, you can come and help me wash my hair? And then things...escalated and I ended up giving it four and a half stars because the water got cold at the end?"
I finally remembered the encounter that had ruined my perfect score.
And I did remember how she came arching back that beautiful neck of hers, and how overwhelmingly pleasant the contrast was, between her hot flesh shivering against mine and the coldness of the water that bathed us. It brought me instantly to my peak and I still wanted to be somewhat careful and pull my hips away from her. But Isa begged me to stay. She said the full moon is weeks away and she had missed feeling me so close.
I was pissed at myself and at the whole world because I didn't want Isa to go through the terror of a loss again. But I also didn't want our pup to be welcomed in her belly by its mom's fear and its dad's resentment.
So I kneeled, and I pressed my lips an inch below my mate's belly button, whispering to the bunch of cells who couldn't yet hear me that they have to grow, they have to follow whatever Life tells them to do. That I will provide for their mother everything she needs so that she can keep them safe until they are big and strong, strong enough to breathe River Border air.
Several months have passed and with each that went Isa's belly became a bit rounder. I was almost ready to exhale relieved but my mate was not. The fourth New Moon coincided with a random family dinner at my parents. My Luna insisted that she felt perfectly fine and fit to drive. She was more excited than me about showing off my first River wave tattoo, which much to her delight, I had decided to get on the side of my ribs.
We had a nice meal and afterward, as per the usual procedure, my brothers and I cleaned the table, and the females relaxed on the couch. Walking with an armful of plates towards the kitchen, I saw Isa blushing to the top of her ears and I heard her asking my mom if she could check if everything is ok with the baby.
"Of course," Ayn blushed in return because even for a Master Healer the privilege of touching a pregnant female is deeply humbling.
"It's an absolutely healthy baby," Ayn whispered in awe as she walked her hands over Isa's summer-kissed bump.
As usual, when my mother did her craft, the world stopped existing for her. Her complete focus was on Isa, on tracing on her belly the shape of the pup's perfect arms, folded against their chest. Showing how they are floating a bit up with every strong heartbeat. Poking gently where its fully formed fingers - all ten of them - were busy growing nails. How the chord is loosely coiled at its side, gorged with blood as it should be.
"Sadly I am blind to their gender," my mom pouted. "And your male refuses to tell me!" She frowned at me but pointed an angry finger at my dad, who stopped in his tracks, a tray full of glasses in his hands. "I blame you, Kari, and all your we don't provide unsolicited information that doesn't belong to us," my mom intentionally did a very poor impression of the Alpha voice which made even Eino - the main recipient of Kari's teachings - burst into laughter. My father chuckled also and sat at her feet, deposing a kiss on her knees.
"Why the sudden thirst for knowledge, love? You insisted on having the surprise with our own."
Without waiting for my mom's answer Isabel opened her mouth to reveal our pup's gender and I barely managed to stop her in time.
"Please, Luna...Let me just have this tiny, symbolic upper hand since she can see our child's real ones," I begged and Isa nodded understandingly. But Alejandra, who was sitting next to my mother, ruthlessly sabotaged my upper hand with the quietest whisper in her ear.
My mom squealed and surprised Isa with one of her rare wholehearted hugs. The funny thing is that I am pretty sure she would have done the same, regardless of the answer. She also rewarded Ale with one, but while Sven's Luna accepted it happily, she asked:
"It's weird that you can't see the gender though. Why is that?"
"Good question," Ayn pondered, relaxing back between her two daughters. "For a while, I thought there was an evolutionary reason behind it. Life is more important than gender, so there is no need to see non-essentials. But some legends claim the gift was taken away by the Gods to prevent witches from culling the boys."
"Say what now?" I asked in shock looking at my father and my brothers for support.
Yes, witches were savagely matriarchal and used a variety of methods to ensure males were always at a disadvantage. They did not brand their sons with a sacred mark at birth, they shackled them with tourmaline throughout their whole childhood, until their core settled. They were denied any form of structured education and had no right to hold leadership positions or own land.
I knew all this only in theory because my mother had broken with us all the rules she could. The three of us had been marked as rightful heirs. She used tourmaline sparingly in the times when our powers ran out of control, threatening to burn down our house and all its inhabitants. She had even bought the deed to her parents' land at Lake Twelve and investigated for a while how to transfer it to the three of us.
And she did invest a lot of time in growing our core but also teaching us about the customs of her subspecies. She had somehow omitted to tell us that there was another terrible layer of control over the males living on the Plains.
"I don't know, Lars, witches are crazy," Ayn let herself slide by her mate's side, and wrapped her arms around his shoulder. "Thank the Gods your father had the courage to seal his bond with one."
"And I thank the Goddess that you didn't kill me in my sleep for giving you a third male, as Ina told me you could," Kari laughed and it was Eino's turn to protest loudly as he scooped leftovers of cake from a random plate:
"What's the issue with the third male?"
"The same as with the first and the second, bro. We're not girls." Sven slapped his back. "Now Lars and I have hopefully compensated, by bringing worthy females into the family. You, however..." my middle brother ducked, narrowly avoiding being stabbed by Eino's fork.
***
"You will enjoy it," my worthy mate's voice brings me back to the River Border.
I am sure I will, I say to myself, eyeing her movements to get at least a peak preview. I don't, because this is a competent Luna, who pays up only when she's satisfied with the job.
Wielding magic is easy, Ayn often said to Sven and me. It's all about connection and flow. Welcoming whatever form our element has, understanding it, and then guiding it with the energy in our core to follow our will.
Wielding magic is fucking hard, I note when the fog refuses all my efforts to move it upwards where it can take the shape of a cloud and fly wherever the fuck it likes. I wave an angry finger at it, freezing it into the finest crystals.
I am average with liquid water but I master its frozen forms fairly well. Because I love snow. It comes easy to me to welcome it in my core. And I can guide snowflakes to gather into snowballs that can be transported elsewhere to melt. But Isa calls this cheating and I know she will not let me off the hook today.
So I breathe again, calling memories of flow in my core.
Cute drops of sweat on my Luna's forehead when she's fighting with new glazing recipes. The tears of release that slide on her flushed cheeks when we make love. My core, melting and swirling gently under her touch, when she pushes away my curls, to kiss the back of my neck.
The cloud leaves slowly, leaving shades of gray on the dry earth.
"So, my Queen, time for my reward," I turn smugly towards my observer.
"You didn't make the hearts..." Isa notes with a teasing pout.
Rolling my eyes, I wave my finger behind me. I don't check my work, but based on the satisfied smile on her face, I gather that I have managed to shape the cloud into two hearts - one for her and one for the baby.
"Now show me," I gesture with my free hand, indicating where exactly the seam of the shirt she's fiddling with should go. Up.
"Come here," she smiles and I am pleased by the prospect of being able to also touch.
But when she takes my hand she places it low, on the side of her bump. The skin there is silky and warm...and pokey.
Isa laughs, sliding her fingers on the spot mine abandoned momentarily, surprised as I was by the poking. I push them away, so I can connect my lips with her belly again, to kiss my daughter's foot, or hand, or butt, whatever body part she is smashing so happily against her mother's womb.
And I remind her again, as I do every day, to not get too excited.
Her parents are Alphas, with superior patience and self-control, able to wait for her until spring. Also, winter is shit at the River Border, it's cold and windy, absolutely subpar as compared to her actual living situation.
And on a selfish note, I could use a bit more time to continue the lobbying I have started with the Shifter's Council, to reinstate the birthright of female Alphas.
"And maybe get those wings?" Isabel says, her voice filled with a smile.
"Yeah, maybe," I whisper, burying my face and my lie in her ribs.
If I tell her, she will want to test them right away and I didn't have time to speak to Ayn yet and ask her if it's safe for a pregnant shifter to fly.
-----------------
Sound: La Fée by ZAZ (incidentally ZAZ's real name is Isa:).