Content Advisory 17+
Author Words --- I was so frightened to write this update. This particular scene. This lovemaking scene showing what is the feelings of two people. I was so scared because Ruhani is mute, so they cannot communicate with words, second I had to show how much Ruhani is into Aashiq that she almost forgot and believes to forgot that there is something Aashiq should know about his father. And, the most difficult thing is the Emotional and physical needs of Aashiq. How desperately he wanted to fill the hole of his past. How desperately he wants to make new memories. Though, he always wanted to have this kind of Chemistry with his wife only, which happened to be Ruhani, as his father demanded. But in beginning, at least he was skeptical about the reality that her family is involved in the demise of his father. But, now as much as he was coming close to Ruhani. He is almost forgetting that fact. Like, for him, she and her family are nothing to do with each other. How much trust he has put in her that he opened up about everything, like everything in front of her. How he is pursuing his love, While on the other hand, how much Ruhani wants this love too, that she is scared to death to even share the bit of his father's truth, knowing she has a direct connection with it and she even lost her own voice because of it. And, she knows the truth is the only thing that can separate these two.
The two ways of love that I tried to show in these 45 chapters. One that makes us stronger and other that makes us vulnerable. The novel is going to be hell-long because the story is full of emotions and the characters are just in the introduction phase. like, there is so much ahead for these two and this is just the beginning. And, we all know that they are going to break each other the much they are loving each other now.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT IT?????
So, I know this is getting slow and pulling like chewing gum but I do not know, When I try to compress it like putting out everything early to wrap it, it just seems incorrect. Because, I always dream of Ruhani as an emotion, as a life of two people committed to each other from childhood, pursuing their love with odds and then finally on the hill to either push others to die or know how to hold, not just a novel.
Well, I feel proud that I have written almost 100k words already in Ruhani. And, when I read it from start, I feels like I just started a month back.
Well, Well, Well!!! I wish you all a very Happy Diwali this year. We all have gone through a lot of things, especially people of age 17 to 26. These years are life-changing and so many doubts, failures, and rejections in all the fields we see. And, being the same age I also feel this, I could not clear my CA Final Exams and have exams next month from 10 November too and I am just too surrounded by the fact that maybe I am not made for it. These doubts buried me deep, hollowing me so that I did not even revise a single chapter. And, honestly, I don't even want to give exams. :-( My mother is so upset about it.
I mean, I do not even know where my life is taking me now. Writing is something I enjoy a lot. Like, my whole day passes just thinking about the plots. I do not how authors around manage this but my mind is always on stories. And, one corner of my brain tells me that you are close to the finish line, Study the shit out.
I am so f*cked up!
By the way, here is the exercise to make you feel better about your self-doubts and negativities. Just find a lone spot in the evening around a candle in the dark. Pen down your doubts, fears, failures, and rejections. Think about those for some time and then tear the paper and burn that in front of you. Even the last ounce of it. Try this!
Happy Diwali lovelies, now enjoy your Diwali special Double updates and DO NOT FORGET MAKING MY DIWALI SPECIAL WITH YOUR FOLLOWS, VOTES, COMMENTS, AND LOTS OF LOVE.
Ruhani POV
I lifted my gaze and gulped looking at Sultan still half naked, holding his kurta in his one hand and wet in rain. His eyes were less red than before. He pushed the door closed behind and I blinked nervously.
He slowly approaches me. I could not help but stand up.
His eyes looked into mine, not devilishly but with slight fear, nervousness, and a hint of craving.
He did not say a single word and silently sat against me on the couch. My eyes noticed his hair strands falling over his forehead and dripping water. His nose was also red.
The mere thought of him catching a cold made my heart pain. He even had a high fever in the morning and if he keeps himself in this state for a long, his health would worsen.
I could stop myself from walking close to him. His eyes never left mine.
I courageously stood in front of him and used the towel to rub his hair dry. We both stayed silent and he lowered his gaze too. His finger tensely played with one of the knots of my nightgown that were on over my chest, midriff, stomach, and lower abdomen. It had a heavy, soft, cotton skirt to cover the legs. Under this, I was wearing the same undergarment of thin cotton fabric that ends mid-thigh.
Suddenly, he broke the silence and muttered.
"I am Sorry, Ruhani. Are yo... are you hurt?"
His voice was painful and scared, head still down and fingers almost trembling.
"I mean... I did not realize it. I go... I got so involved, in your fragrance, presence an... and warmth. I ju... I am sorry, I just could not stop. And, I do... do not know how all that happened so fast,"
A small smile appeared on my face knowing he was in the same dilemma which I was into.
"And, I did not want it to happen like that. I mean, our first time, I thought it would be... precious and... I am just so sorry,"
He just lifted his face and I hid my smile quickly looking back at him.
"Are you hurt? I am mean, down there... I mean, I could feel it... a little difficult and,"
He gulped and the blush reappeared on my face.
"I can make you feel better, I promise,"
He muttered and looked at my face for an answer.
The silence followed for the next few moments.
Then, I slowly tried to shake my face as I did not want him to feel this way. It was beautiful, everything was so beautiful. We both were equally in the moment. And, I did not regret doing it. There was no need of making it any better.
But.
"Please, I want to make you feel better. I did not want it to happen like that... take y... you like that,"
His voice was slow, shaky, and pleading.
I nodded slowly and he lowered his gaze. I waited to see what he wanted to do with now. How was he going to make me feel better than before?
"Are you sore?"
He asked and looked at me. I gulped and signaled him a little bit by pressing my thumbnail at the tip of my index finger.
I saw him licking his lower lip with his tongue a little and he lowered his gaze back to the thread of my nightgown. I saw his finger slowly and swiftly moving to pull it. I blinked nervously, thinking if he meant to suck me to make me feel better.
But, a part of me wanted it, wanted this night to not end.
He pulled the other threads with the same pace and his eyes looked at me.
Signaling me with his pleading eyes to take my gown down off my shoulder for him. He parted it slowly and I felt timid with the exposition of my bare legs. My fingers dropped the towel to the floor and moved as he wished. Lowering my gown off my shoulder and leaving me half naked in the undergarment.
His eyes stole a view of my legs and his finger lightly traced my thigh. I felt goosebumps with that touch. My heartbeats shifted pace.
I felt the tip of his index finger moving from my knee upwards, slowly hooking into the hem of my dress. He moves it upward swiftly and I saw him leaning closer to there. I felt his hot breath against my thigh, sooner replaced with warm, wet kisses.
I blinked and inhaled a sharp breath, my lips parting a little to feel the butterflies dancing on my skin again.
But, as soon as he pulls the cottony fabric sufficiently above to place his lips right above my crown, my head falls backward and my lashes feel heavy to stay open.
I felt his tongue making me wet, then his lips sucking me. My one hand rested on his naked shoulder and the other's finger held his hair. My body unknowingly bent slightly forward in anticipation and I felt like he was craving for me.
My knees started feeling weak and I could feel my face insanely hot and red. My strength draining making me feel weak to stay standing and still.
His one hand around my waist kept me still there and the other on my thigh. He kissed, sucked, and played with me until he got tired. And, I felt like a fish, struggling for my breaths, and strength and going crazy with the racing heartbeats.
When it became intolerant and I could feel that I could no longer bear the sensations bubbling from his lips, I took a step backward.
I could hear him panting slowly, struggling for his own breath and I took a few more steps backward. His gaze was down and then he slowly lifted it to look at me. My heart pounded insanely seeing his lips wet and red. My eyes blinked and my fingers moved slowly to adjust my clothes a little. My long hair danced along as I took a few more steps backward and myself blocked by the bed's pillar.
I lowered my gaze instantly and felt insanely timid with what just happened. And, I could feel that he stood up from his place and his footsteps were slowly approaching me.
I found him standing against me and then I closed my eyes when I felt his index finger around my collarbone.
He moved it across my collarbone visible and moved a thick strand of my hair behind. I blinked with the tickling and beautiful feeling. Then, I realized that his eyes were looking at the bright red bruise that he left on my neck.
He leaned in and kissed my neck, I felt his hot breath fanning me and loved how slowly his lips were burning that fire again into me.
He kissed me softly and I looked into his eyes. They were speaking love, care, and respect for me.
But, holding his gaze was still a difficult task and even impossible knowing what just happened between us.
I lowered my gaze back and took two steps to sit on the bed. His eyes were always on me. When I nervously sat on the edge of it and then pulled my leg up on the bed, to push myself backward in a swift motion.
My legs closed to each other, and one knee high. My eyes courageously yet shamelessly looked at him. I lay backward lying on the bed and his eyes scanned my face.
I slowly forwarded my hand signaling him to come over which he silently saw for some moments and decided not to take.
I gulped with mixed emotions but before my heart could understand something wrong, I saw him sitting on the floor on his knees, against the edge of the bed. I arched my midriff to look into his eyes and saw his hand touching my feet.
I straightened myself immediately when he leans his face closer to my ankle. I pulls my feet towards me before he could kiss them. He lifted his gaze and I shook my head.
A smile appeared on his face and it raced through my heartbeats like never before.
He stood up again and he muttered slowly.
"We cannot share the bed,"
I gulped nervously, my eyebrows drawing thin in confusion.
"I am still wet,"
He said and I lowered my gaze to his lower which was still dripping water. I gulped and looked back at him. My body changed my posture by sitting on my knees close to him.
Bringing my trembling fingers forward, I tenderly held the thick thread of his lower. My heart felt a little nervous to pull them. And, before I could even, he places his hand around my jaw and pulls me upward.
My eyes met his and he looked into my eyes. I saw him tearing my layers and looking deep inside me. My fast heartbeats started slowing down and I pushes my head upward to take my lips closer to his.
My lips touched his for a moment and then separated. I looked at his lips for the next moment and then pressed mine against his again. He kissed me and I returned it but it last for another few until he withdrew his lips back.
My eyes blinks and shamelessly watched his neck, wide shoulders, and chest.
My lips unknowingly leaned in to plant kisses on his shoulder and then slowly on his chest. While my fingers again moved swiftly across his lower's securing knot and tenderly pulled them.
I could feel his fingers moving through the length of my hair and my hands worked to move his lower down.
I pulled my lips back off his chest when I took the last clothes off his body and looked into his eyes.
He gulped looking at me and I felt him putting his knee on the bed. His hand on my nape slowly pushed me backward to lie again.
He claimed my lips and I felt our bodies touching each other. My hand moved to cup his cheek in anticipation and around his neck. While his hand snaked and touched my thigh, swiftly pulling the dress upward. It did not take him more than a moment to move the loose dress off my body through the neck.
He broke the kiss and looked into my eyes.
"You won't regret it ever?"
Another Update!!!
Love you All ❤❤❤