𝙎𝙞𝙭. 𝘈𝘴 𝘐𝘵 𝘞𝘢𝘴
...
THE FIRST WORDS that Thomas said to her after 11 years continue to repeat in her head. Out of all things he could have said to her, of all the things she was expecting or imagined he would say when or if the day came. A mere comment about the hat on her head and nothing more was what it was, which left the girl baffled to say the least. She often thought about what would happen if she ever crossed paths with Thomas Shelby again. Wondering what would happen, what he would say, how he would react, and planning a response for every scenario she could think of; Angry, resentment, happy, relief, confusion, surprise. But this one was not in the book of plans stored in the blonde girl's head.
She found herself now holding the hat in her hands as she sat at the kitchen table in front of the burning fire. The familiar comfort the the Shelby home still managed to give the girl was something that she hadn't felt for a long time. Prior to this she found more comfort at a hospital ward than her own empty home back in Dartford. One would think that this meant the girl would be inclined to stay, yet as she sits by the fire she thinks about how she is to leave. It is not because she doesn't feel welcome, but it is the feeling of regret and shame that follows her around as she walks down the streets of Small Heath, especially when she looks at a Shelby. How could they just forgive her like that?
The sound of someone walking through the door into the room causes Elizabeth to look up. Her eyes are met with a woman this time who first looked like she was about to shout at the girl, but her face quickly softens out of realization. "I thought those boys were just taking nonsense", Polly says as she sets down a bag on the table, "Pullin' at my strings like usual."
Elizabeth gives a slight smile, as she can't exactly tell if the woman is happy or upset that she is in her kitchen. After all, she did basically abandon her nephews without warning, and she very well knew how protective the women was of her boys. Pol proceeds closer to the girl who finds herself digging her heels into the floor, anticipating only the worst.
Although the lady was only six years older than the girl, she still called her Aunt Pol like the rest of the lot; Mostly out of respect. If you were to ask a young Elizabeth she'd say she would rather take on three angry Shelby boys all at once over one angry Aunt Polly any day of the week. And that exact thought blossoms in the golden haired girls mind in the moment.
Polly stops in front of the girl and stands there, staring down at her, her dark brown eyes swallowing Elizabeth's hazel ones like a black hole.
As her heartbeat rapidly beats in her chest, a feeling of nausea from the angst almost comes over the girl. "Don't just sit there", Polly says, "Act like it hasn't been 11 years, give me a fuckin' hug, at least pretend like you bloody missed me for Gods sake."
A mental sigh of relief floods Elizabeth's body as she gets up from the chair and is instantly engulfed in a hug.
"Thank you for coming back", she quietly says as they continue to embrace one another, "If not for anyone else, at least for Tommy's sake, thank you."
She lets go of the hug and before she could even say a word back to the lady, a quick but light slap across the cheek catches her off guard.
"And that's for bloody pickin' up and leaving without saying squat to the family", she says in a stern voice, "Don't you be pulling something like that again or I'll throw you in the cutter myself."
There she is, the girl thought to herself and as per reflex she puts her hand up to hold her cheek.
"I'm sorry Aunt Pol", Elizabeth says looking down at the ground like she was 13 again getting scolded by a 19 year old Polly, "It's a long story."
The woman pulls out the chair beside girl and sits down, tapping the table space beside her while looking up at the Alder girl who she considers to be her niece. "Well it's a good thing I've got some time", she says.
...
Of all people, of course it was her Aunt Polly that eventually convinced her to stay the night. Convincing or forcing could be up for debate, but Miss. Alder knew not to fight her on it as she knew the outcome would be the same regardless of if she put up a fight or not.
"I say we get bloody piss drunk to celebrate Liz's return", John says.
Elizabeth can't help but laugh as the all grown up John is so different than the young boy she left so long ago. As she thinks about it, she can't even recall the last time she got drunk for the sole purpose of getting shit faced and nothin' else. It just wasn't expected or accepted from a lady such as herself to do back in Dartford.
"Aren't you already", Pol exclaims.
John gives his Aunt nothing but a look, which was definitely his way of saying she was in fact correct.
There the blonde girl sat at the dining room table once again, but this time with the whole Shelby family sat and standing around as well, much like as it was 11 years ago.
"We all know why we're here", Thomas speaks up, breaking the brief silence that fell amongst them. His deep voice again managing to send shivers down Elizabeth's neck, causing the little hairs to stand up on end. "Who wants to speak up first?".
Again, silence falls amongst the table. The Alder girl not knowing what is happening continues to sit with her mouth closed as she looks around, waiting for someone to speak. That's usually how she kept safe while at family meetings oh so long ago, so she figured doing the same would be in her best interest.
"Well go on now", Arthur says and she looks over and to her surprise he is looking right back at her, his eyes seemingly peering into her soul. "Explain yourself why don't ya."
"Me?", she asks as she points a finger towards herself.
"Mhm", Arthur grunts as he leans back into his chair.
It soon clicks in that it is everyone except her who knows what this family meeting is about, and most likely why Polly was so adamant on her staying. And the topic too quickly reveals itself to the girl; It's her.
But to be frank, it was always her. It has always been Elizabeth Alder, one way or another. Somehow it just all circles back to her, leaving the blonde haired girl in the middle of it all. She looks around at everyone sitting and standing at the table: Arthur, Polly, and Ada (who notably has not said a word to the girl since arriving home and seeing her when left her quite uneasy), and John and Thomas standing just behind, all of their eyes on her. She notices that they are all seemingly positioned to face her, which made her only feel foolish as she should have gotten the hint from just that.
"I don't know where to start", she quietly says as she fiddles with her hands.
"How about you start 11 years ago just after you bloody came over for breakfast and then causally announced you were leaving, and the said not one more word then up and left", Ada spits, causing Elizabeth's eyes to go wide. "Oh and don't forget to elaborate on the part where you decided that putting in any efforts to talk to any of us or visit just once was too much for you because I'm fuckin' interested in hearing that as well".
From speaking no words to the Alder girl to basically shouting at her, Ada found herself a little relived. The departure of Elizabeth took a toll on every Shelby member, but it effected the young Ada in different ways that the others just wouldn't understand. To Ada the golden haired girl was her older and only sister; She was in her earliest of memories, she was the one she would go to when she was in need, and she always knew she could trust her. At least up until she left Small Heath. As a result, betrayal, sadness, confusion, and anger all piled up inside the then 11 year old Ada like a tidal wave washing her out to sea. Those sort of feelings being brought on by someone who like Elizabeth was to Ada back then was something even an adult would struggle to handle, let alone a child.
"I had to go", Elizabeth says looking down at her lap.
To explain it all to the Shelby family was not something she wanted to do, given she had already done so with Polly not long ago. Telling the story made her feel as if she was re-living the past 11 years and all of the guilt and anxiety that stacked up from it would hit her all at once.
The room stays silent, indicating the girl to go on. "A man that...", she trails off to regain her composure, "That um, Ben apparently met after he left, they made a deal out in Oxford to get him out of some sort of debt; he offered our Mother to him and his men because he bloody told em' she was a widow."
The few times Elizabeth had said her bother's name over the decade or so it always managed to bring a stabbing pain in her chest. Already she could feel the tears forming as her eyes begin to gloss over. Keeping her eyes on the table in front of her she forces her tears back to continue, "My Mum told me that morning there would be some men to pick her up to take her out to Oxford. She never said it but I knew what it meant for her, what she would have to do, what they would make her do. She didn't have to say it, I don't think I would've wanted her to anyways, I could just see it in her eyes; Telling me she's sorry. Saying goodbye. I couldn't let them take her away", Elizabeth says.
Although Elizabeth never took her eyes off the table, the previously angry eyes of Ada Shelby began to soften. The eyes of everyone in the room for that matter, including her ocean eyed boy, softened as well like they were being opened for the first time and they are now just starting to see clearly.
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[ Chapter Status: Not Edited ]
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authors note: you cannot tell me you did not sing that chapter title like harry styles....