#OLAPlayPretend
Chapter 15
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Countless rejections poured into my life. Hindi ko na mabilang kung ilang beses na akong na-reject ng mga ina-applyan kong trabaho. I came to the point where I felt useless. I was tired of hearing the same rejection spiel over and over again.
Hindi ko alam kung saan at ano ang problema. I was confident with my credentials. Maayos din ang working experience ko kahit na isang kompanya pa lang ako nagtatrabaho simula noong maka-graduate. That only meant the company liked my service — the reason why I managed to stay there for a long time.
"Sorry. We have no more available positions," malungkot na saad sa akin ng HR.
Napakunot naman ang noo ko. I passed their final interview three days ago. Ang sabi ay kokontakin nila ako kapag tapos na nilang magawa ang job offer at pipirma na lang ako ng kontrata. I thought my misery was finally ending, but it seemed like there was no end to it.
"I'm sorry din po, Ma'am..." Umayos ako ng upo. "Sa pagkakaalam ko po, I already passed the initial and final interview. Tanggap na po ako. I was told I just need to sign the contract at pwede na akong magsimula."
"Yes, but there was a miscommunication in our team. May nauna na pa lang i-hire sa 'yo na kakapirma lang ng kontrata kahapon," sabi niya. "We're really sorry for the inconvenience. If you want we can refer you to another company... uhm... sandali lang."
Habang medyo tulala ako sa pangyayari, nataranta ang HR sa pagkuha ng isang flyer. She then placed it down in front of me, reminding me of my past.
It was an advertisement flyer from Dela Vega Holdings. Nakalagay roon na naghahanap sila ng Administrative Assistant — the position I left vacant months ago.
Halos ilang buwan na rin akong wala sa kompanya. Hindi ako makapaniwalang sa tinagal-tagal ng panahon na wala ako roon ay hindi pa rin sila nakahanap ng kapalit ko.
I also had no idea why the HR showed me that flyer when she knew my past working experience. Nakalagay naman sa resume ko na sa DVH ako dating nagtatrabaho at ang posisyon na nakalagay mismo sa flyer ang naging posisyon ko. Bukod pa roon ay wala namang relasyon ang kompanya nila sa DVH.
How will they endorse me? Nagbibiro ba siya? I'm not stupid!
"Dela Vega Holdings is open for hiring. If you want, you can try and apply there," she told me as smoothly as she could, but I caught her expression twitching.
Naningkit ang mga mata ko habang nakatitig sa kanya. On second thought, I felt like I already knew the answers to the questions inside my head. Alam ko na ang dahilan kung bakit niya inaalok sa akin ang trabaho na 'yon at kung bakit biglang hindi na nila ako tatanggapin.
I refused to think I wasn't fit for the jobs that I applied for when I got all it takes to be hired. Isa lang ang ibig sabihin noon. Someone was certainly behind this suffering, at mukhang kilala ko na kung sino.
Kung totoo man ang iniisip ko, hindi ko alam kung bakit niya 'to ginagawa. I had not heard from him since I resigned. Kung bakit siya nagpaparamdam sa pamamagitan nito ay hindi ko alam, and I didn't want to take the bait.
Kagat-kagat ang ibabang labi, nakahawak ako sa disposable cup ng iniinom na kape. I usually drink iced coffees, but I needed something warm to make me feel comfortable while waiting.
Hindi rin naman nagtagal ay dumating na si Joseph. We didn't keep in touch that much, but he would text me every once in a while. Madalas ay kinukumusta niya ako at nagtatanong kung nakahanap na ba ako ng trabaho. He also said that if I needed anything, I shouldn't hesitate contacting him.
"Chantal!" Napataas si Joseph nang makita ako. Nagmadali siya sa paglapit.
Isang tipid na ngiti ang ibinigay ko sa kanya. "Joseph," bati ko at tumango. "Ang aga mo... Akala ko mamaya ka pa dadating."
Wala pang alas-singko kaya medyo nagulat pa akong nakarating na siya agad. Imposible namang nakapag-early out siya. Knowing Xaiver's work schedule, he would have to stay until six to eight in the evening lalo na't siya na lang ang nag-iisang sekretarya nito.
"Uhm, napaaga ng uwi si Sir Xaiver. Medyo masama ata pakiramdam..." nag-aalangan niyang sagot at mabilis na sinuyod ng tingin ang lamesa. "Magkakape lang ba tayo? Let's eat dinner! Maghahapunan na rin naman. Sagot ko na!"
To be honest, I didn't really wanna eat out since I was doing my best to save money as much as I could. Having no source of income from being unemployed depleted my savings. If I don't get hired until the next two months, hindi ko na alam kung saan ko kukuhanin ang panggastos sa maintenance na gamot at dialysis ni Mama.
Nagsisisi ako kung bakit hindi ko ginawang mag-invest sa kahit maliit na negosyo. Huli na nang naisip kong hindi dapat natutulog ang pera sa banko. Hindi lang dapat sa sahod nanggagaling ang pera. You should look for other ways to earn money. Or else, unforeseen circumstances like my situation at that moment would humble you.
It was unfortunate that not everyone had the opportunity to save, though. Karamihan ng tao sa bansa ay pinagkakasya lang ang sahod sa kanilang pamilya at wala nang natitira. They are only working to pay their bills, buy necessities, and survive the cruel world. Kung sana ay may mas magandang job offers at benefits dito katulad sa ibang bansa. But before anything else, we should first fix the employment system in the country. That way, more people would be employed instead of resorting to earning dirty money.
I was still somehow fortunate that I had saved enough to cover our expenses without a job. Kaya nga lang, hindi na rin 'yon magtatagal. Kailangan ko nang kumilos.
"Uhm, ayos lang ba sa 'yo kung dito na lang tayo?" tanong ko kay Joseph. "Sandali lang naman. May mga gusto lang sana akong itanong."
"Hay nako, Chantal! Kung ano ang mga gusto mong itanong, pag-usapan na lang natin over dinner. Hindi pa ako nakakain nang maayos kaninang lunch. May meeting kami kanina mula umaga hanggang hapon," reklamo niya.
Naawa naman ako agad sa kaibigan. Pumayag na rin ako agad na kumain kami sa labas. Joseph took me to an expensive restaurant na malapit lang din sa DVH. I wanted to stop him, pero tuloy-tuloy lang ang pasok niya sa loob pagkatapos i-confirm ang reservation.
"You made a reservation?" nagtataka kong tanong habang naglalakad kami papunta sa lamesa.
"Ah! Oo!" Hilaw na tumawa si Joseph. "Nagke-crave kasi ako rito kaya nung inaya mo ako kanina, nagpa-reserve ako agad."
Napakunot ang noo ko. "Sana sa fast food na lang tayo... Masyadong mahal dito, Joseph."
"Don't worry, Chantal. Sagot ko naman!"
"Kaya nga mas magandang sa iba na lang tayo..." mahina kong sabi dahil baka marinig kami ng waiter na nag-assist sa amin.
I appreciated Joseph's generosity, and I loved the food there, but the prices were insanely expensive for a single meal. Ilang beses na rin akong kumain dito kasama si Xaiver. I didn't mind it back then dahil siya naman ang nagbabayad at kadalasan ay may ka-meeting kaming mga clients at business partners. Pero kung si Joseph, I didn't want him spending that much.
"Okay lang, Chantal. Ngayon na lang tayo ulit nagkita. Sulitin na natin 'to!"
I pursed my lips and just followed Joseph until we reached the table reserved for us. Agad kaming pumuwesto roon. The waiter served us water and waited while Joseph was still busy scanning the menu.
Hindi na ako nag-abalang tumingin din at mamili ng kakainin. I just let him decide our dinner na agad ko ring pinagsisihan. He ordered the most expensive steak on the menu for us! Hindi lang isang order 'yon kundi dalawa! Napalunok na lang ako nang sulyapan ko ang presyo. I couldn't believe he would spend thousands just for a single meal with me.
"Thank you, Joseph..." nahihiya kong sabi sa kanya matapos kuhanin ng waiter ang order namin. "Pag nakahanap ako ng trabaho, ako naman ang manlilibre sa 'yo. Promise."
"Ano ka ba! Hindi na kailangan!" muli siyang tumawa, ngunit agad ding naglaho ang ngiti sa labi nang magseryoso. "Pero... hindi ka pa rin nakakahanap ng trabaho?"
Napabuntonghininga ako't tumango. Muli kong naalala ang nangyari noong umagang 'yon. Pinaasa lang ako ng kompanya na pinag-applyan ko. I thought I was really hired. But speaking of...
Maingat akong nag-angat ng tingin kay Joseph. Naabutan ko siyang tinitikman ang wine na inorder. He seemed to be enjoying himself so much. He was living his life to the fullest na para bang hindi aabot sa sampung libo ang babayaran niya para sa hapunan naming dalawa.
"Uhm, nga pala, Joseph... Did Xaiver buy new stocks or has a partnership with a small time company or..." Hindi ko alam kung paano ako magtatanong na hindi magtutunog pinaghinalaan si Xaiver.
Saglit na napatigil si Joseph. Unti-unti niya ring binaba ang wine glass saka umiling. "Wala naman. At least, none that I know of. He's still focused on the pharmaceutical project," sagot niya. "And you know, Xaiver Dela Vega so well, Chantal. As cruel as it may sound, wala siyang pakialam sa mga small businesses."
"I know, but, uhm... wala pa bang nakukuhang kapalit ko?"
"You mean — as his personal secretary?"
I nodded.
"Wala pa..." Naningkit ang mga mata niya. "Pero ano naman ang connect no'n sa tanong mo kanina?"
Tahimik kong kinuha ang flyer na binigay sa akin ng HR kanina. Inabot ko 'yon kay Joseph at muntik na siyang masamid sa hangin nang makita kung ano ang nakalagay sa flyer.
"Nag-apply ako sa isang maliit na kompanya. I thought I would have more chances of getting hired there dahil kailangan ko na talagang magkaroon ng trabaho. I passed the final interview and got hired. The only thing left was to sign the contract, pero nung bumalik ako, may nakakuha na raw ng posisyon na pinag-a-applyan ko at wala nang ibang bakante," kwento ko. "Binigay 'yan sa akin ng HR... Pwede raw nila akong i-refer sa inyo. I just found it unusual lalo na't alam kong wala namang koneksyon ang kompanya nila sa DVH. I thought—"
"You think Xaiver's behind your rejected job applications?" si Joseph na ang nagtuloy.
Bahagya akong nagulat sa pagiging pranka niya. Gusto kong itanggi, ngunit hindi na rin ako sumubok. Tutal ay iyon naman talaga ang gusto kong malaman o makumpirma bago gawin ang susunod kong hakbang. I had to make sure first. Ayaw ko ring mapahiya. Baka mamaya ay nag-a-assume lang pala ako.
"Tingin mo rin ba?" balik kong tanong kay Joseph.
Ngumuso siya at saka isinauli ang flyer. Mukhang malalim ang inisip niya bago siya tuluyang sumagot.
"Ang totoo niyan, hindi ko rin alam, Chantal," sabi niya. He sounded remorseful. "Wala rin namang nababanggit sa akin si Sir Xaiver tungkol sa mga ganyang bagay."
I was unsure if Joseph was actually saying the truth or telling me otherwise. Hindi siya makatingin sa akin nang diretso.
I didn't bother pressing him for more. Ayaw kong isipin niyang wala akong tiwala sa kanya. I'd take what I could get from him kahit na wala naman talaga akong nakuha.
Pagkatapos namin kumain ng hapunan ay nag prisinta na rin si Joseph na ihatid ako pauwi. I arrived home with a heavy heart and questions left unanswered. That pressure in my chest only grew when my mother's proud smile greeted me.
"Anak!" tuwang-tuwa si Mama nang lumapit sa akin. Galing siya sa kusina at tanaw ko agad ang cake na nakahanda roon kasama ng hapunan na siguro'y niluto niya para pagsaluhan naming dalawa.
I forgot to tell her that I already had dinner with Joseph. Bukod pa roon, hindi ko pa rin nasabi kahit sa text o tawag na hindi natuloy ang pagpirma ko ng kontrata. I didn't know how to tell her that her daughter was still jobless, especially after she had prepared something special for me to celebrate. Ang tagal naming hinintay na makakuha ako ng panibagong trabaho. I felt so guilty. I didn't want to fail her and be a disappointment.
"Kumusta ang lakad? Ginabi ka ah? Nag start ka ba agad sa trabaho?" sunod-sunod ang tanong niya.
I forced a smile to conceal the emotions I tried to hide. Kaya nga lang ay agad iyong nakuha ni Mama bago ko pa maitago. Lumukot ang kanyang noo at tuluyang lumapit sa akin. She reached for my hand, gripping it tightly.
"Ano'ng nangyari, Chantal? Anak?"
Sa simpleng tanong niya ay agad bumuhos ang luha ko. Hindi naman ako naiiyak kanina. I was confused and disappointed, but I didn't have the urge to cry. Kaya hindi ko alam kung bakit ako umiiyak at talagang sa harap pa ni Mama.
Siguro ay napagod na rin ako at nawalan na ng pag-asa. Unti-unti nang nauubos ang savings ko at kapag nagpatuloy pa 'to, wala nang matitira sa akin. I couldn't help feeling a hint of regret while facing the consequences of my abrupt decision.
Masyado ba akong nagpadalos-dalos sa mga desisyon ko? Dapat ba ay hindi ako nag-resign? Dapat ba tiniis ko na lang?
Kung tama ang hinala kong may kinalaman si Xaiver, matatapos pa ba 'to? Titigilan niya rin ba ako? Kung oo, hanggang kailan?
Mas dumami ang mga tanong na nagsisulputan sa isipan ko. I was already overthinking things. My life was filled with uncertainties, like dark clouds hovering over my skies. No one knows when the heavy rain will pour or if it will eventually clear up. I was constantly sitting on the edge of my seat, debating if I should wait for nature to take its course or meet it halfway to see if I could do something to make sure its outcome be in my favor.
Maaga akong nakatulog noong gabing 'yon. My mother comforted me and gave a lot of encouraging words so that I wouldn't lose hope. Kaya naman maaga ako ulit gumising kinabukasan upang magpatuloy sa paghahanap ng trabaho. I still had five companies left on my list. Kung hindi pa rin palarin, maghahanap pa ako ng iba.
While organizing my files, my phone suddenly chimed for a message. Tamad ko 'yong kinuha upang tingnan. I thought it was just another scam, but my eyes narrowed to see Dela Vega Holdings in the message.
From: Unregistered Number
OPEN FOR HIRING!
Dela Vega Holdings is looking for an Administrative Assistant. Earn as much as 30 thousand monthly with benefits.
For more inquiries, please send an email to hrdelavegaholdings@dvh.com
Napakunot ang noo ko nang mabasa ang text. Imposibleng nagpi-phising lang ang nag-text dahil totoong email ng HR ang ginamit. Ni hindi sila naglagay ng link kung scam din katulad ng mga natatanggap ko.
I was about to close my phone when an email notification popped on my screen. Mabilis ko 'yong binuksan. Galing sa official email account din ng Dela Vega Holdings ang natanggap ko at halos pareho lang ang mensahe sa text.
Are they for real? Ginagago ba nila ako?
Unti-unti akong nakaramdam ng inis. I shoved the phone inside my bag and pretended I didn't read any of that. Bago nga lang tuluyang umalis, habang nag-aayos ng sarili ay naisip ko ang necklace na hindi niya kinuha sa akin noong huli naming pagkikita.
I didn't know what came into my mind. Inalagay ko iyon sa pinakailalim ng aking bag para dalhin sa paghahanap ng trabaho. I doubted if it would bring me luck, but I still did. And as the time went by, I realized that I could no longer ignore the highly suspicious occurrences. Pakiramdam ko ay talagang sinasadya na. It wasn't just a mere coincidence.
"I'm sorry, Miss Bersales. Hindi na kami magpapaligoy-ligoy pa — you didn't make it to the cut," sabi ng HR sa unang kompanyang inapplyan ko para sa araw na 'yon. "You can try applying at DVH. May job opening sila ngayon. Your credentials and experience are exactly what they need."
"We don't have any job vacancies left. If you want, pwede kang mag-apply sa DVH. They are looking for an Administrative Assistant," sabi ng pangalawa at binigyan din ako ng flyer na katulad kahapon.
"Sorry, Ma'am. Wala na po kasing bakante. Pwede po namin kayong i-refer sa—"
"Sa DVH?" pinutol ko na ang pangatlong inapplyan ko. "Binasa ninyo po ba ang resume ko?"
Tahimik siyang tumango, mukhang punong-puno ng pag-aalangan.
"I'm sure nakita ninyo po kung saan ako dating nagtatrabaho at kung ano ang naging posisyon ko. Balak ninyo po bang ialok ulit sa akin 'yon?"
I didn't want to be rude, but I already lost my patience. Halos pare-pareho lang sila ng spiel nang mga nabista kong kompanya sa araw na 'yon.
Hindi na siya nakasagot nang nagpatuloy ako sa pagkukwestyon sa kanya. I also didn't waste more time and stood up. Mabilis kong ibinalik ang resume sa loob ng envelope na dala at tinalikuran ang HR.
I left the building and quickly hailed a taxi. Wala na akong balak pang puntahan ang natitirang dalawang kompanya kahit na malapit lang din 'yon sa huli kong inapplyan. I was finally convinced that Xaiver was behind everything. Hindi ko na kailangan pa ng ibang kumpirmasyon. If he was only trying to pull strings behind the scenes before, I had a feeling that he wanted me to confront him by making things more obvious. He was done hiding, and I was also tired of playing games with him.
"Chantal!" Gulat na napatayo si Joseph nang makita akong galit na nagmartsa at dire-diretso sa opisina.
"Nandito ba si Xaiver?" tanong ko at hindi na nag-abalang huminto.
"Oo, pero—"
Hindi na natapos ni Joseph ang sasabihin. I shamelessly opened the door to his office without asking for permission. Para nga lang akong binuhusan nang malamig na tubig nang makita kong mayroon siyang kausap sa visitor's area.
I was embarrassed for suddenly barging in. It was very unprofessional of me. Ni hindi ko man lang naisip na baka nasa closed meeting nga siya bago tuluyang pumasok. Masyado kasi siyang maraming oras na mangialam sa buhay ko. I didn't think he would be busy working.
Agad namang napalingon sa akin ang kanyang mga bisita na aking namukhaan. They were the couple we met at Hariette's charity ball last time. Alala ko pang pauwi na kami no'n nang nakasalubong ang dalawa.
Xaiver's serious gaze drifted to me. He stared at me for a few seconds before looking at his guests. "Mr. Dizon, I'll send a team to your company once I'm done reviewing the proposal, or we can set another meeting. I'm sorry. I suddenly have an important matter to attend to."
Mr. Dizon let out a baritone laugh. Sumulyap siya sa akin bago tumango-tango. "I understand, I understand... Walang problema, Xaiver." Tinapik niya ang balikat ni Xaiver saka tumayo at inalalayan din ang asawa. "We'll go now."
Tumango si Xaiver at tumayo na rin. "My secretary will see you out."
"Oh! No need!" Muling tumawa si Mr. Dizon at tumingin sa akin. "We can see ourselves out."
"My husband's right, Xaiver. Mukhang may importante nga kayong pag-uusapan ng sekretarya mo," Mrs. Dizon added, probably thinking that I was still Xaiver's secretary.
Xaiver smiled and shook his head lightly. He didn't bother explaining, though. Joseph entered the office just right in time to escort the couple out.
"Si Joseph na po ang bahala sa inyo," sabi niya na lang sa mag-asawa.
"Oh, I see..." Tumango-tango si Mr. Dizon at mas lalong napangiti.
Gaya dati, kitang-kita ang nag-uumapaw na kuryosidad sa mukha ng dalawa. Hindi na lamang sila nagtanong at sumunod na palabas kay Joseph na sinarado ang pinto ng opisina kasabay ng paglabas.
"You're finally back," Xaiver's playful tone resounded inside his quiet office.
I turned my head to look at him after watching everyone else leave. Nakaupo na siya sa kanyang swivel chair habang nakatingin sa akin. He looked so satisfied to see me standing in front of him. His eyes shined with unmistakable amusement. I had never seen him that pleased even after signing a huge deal with another well-established empire.
Seeing his composure, I thought I might have fallen into his trap. I didn't know if it was the right decision to come back, but I wouldn't dare leave until I settled scores with him.