"You could have confided in us, you know?"
I looked away from Pansy's hurt expression, the guilt causing a pain in my chest.
"No I couldn't," I answered dully, "you would have told me I was crazy."
"Well, yes of course we would have done. You're screwing the guy who tried to kill you. But hey, we're your mates and we love you, and if that's the kind of thing you're into, then we'll support it."
I blinked back the tears, touched by Pansy's words.
"But what about Andrei?" Daphne asked, her eyebrows knitting in confusion. "Does he know about all of this?"
"Daphne, get a clue," Blaise muttered, answering the question for me, "Potter is Andrei."
Daphne's eyes widened. "You mean Potter has to marry a Bulgarian princess?"
Scowling, I clutched the cushion I was hugging tighter, sorely tempted to throw it in Daphne's stupid face.
"No," I snapped. "I made it all up to get you lot off my back. I knew none of you would understand."
I was in a foul mood. It was Sunday evening and I hadn't seen Harry since the dramatic events of the day before. Snape had dragged him away in front of the whole school, leaving me to deal with the fallout on my own.
Questions had been fired at me along with nasty accusations - one of which was from Lavender Brown saying that I must have used a love potion for Harry to pick me over Ginny Weasley.
I had been speechless, my mouth opening and closing like a goldfish as I tried to process what had just happened.
It was Blaise who had come to my rescue, hastily grabbing my elbow to drag me away from the furious Gryffindors as they continued to shout hateful remarks at my back.
When we had reached the dungeons however, Blaise turned on me.
"Potter? POTTER?! Seriously? What the fuck were you thinking?!"
"HE MAKES ME HAPPY!"
Finally. The answer to why we ever did what we ever did. The honest answer. But it didn't seem to satisfy Blaise in the slightest.
"Happy?!" He had spluttered. "We're in the middle of a fucking war, Draya, and you're literally sleeping with the enemy!"
"Oh don't be so dramatic, Blaise," I had scoffed, folding my arms across my chest. "Harry's hardly the enemy."
"Your father is in prison for working for the man who wants him dead!"
"So? It doesn't bother Harry, so it shouldn't bother you."
"For fuck's sake, Dray, snap out of it! My god, I know you've been obsessed with Potter from day dot but I hadn't realised it had reached this kind of sick level."
He'd stormed off to his dormitory after that and I'd spent the rest of the weekend wandering around the castle, trying to find Harry but with little success.
So by the time Sunday evening had arrived, I'd given up and sloped back to the Slytherin common room, moping on the sofa by the fire.
"I bet Potter's good in bed," Millicent mused dreamily, twirling a finger in her hair as she sat on Goyle's lap in the armchair.
Everyone looked at her, their mouths falling open.
"What?" She said. "He's hot. He's clearly well built. I bet he's got some stamina."
"Try not ter imagine it too much," Goyle said as he cracked his knuckles. "Or else I'll have ter knock his nose out of joint."
"Oh relax, Greggy," Millicent said, leaning up to rub her nose against his, "I wouldn't do anything that excluded my big teddy bear."
"And he has big hands," Pansy agreed. "Plus, the way he controls that broomstick, you can tell he's got the moves."
"Will you all shut up talking about it?!" I spluttered, although secretly I was smug that what they were saying was perfectly true.
"Yes, thank you," Theo muttered, expertly rolling a joint. "I haven't got enough of this to make me un-imagine Potter and Goyle giving Bulstrode a spit roast."
We all groaned, each of us now unwillingly entertaining this disturbing scenario in our minds.
"So," Pansy said after a moment of silence, turning to look at me with an arched eyebrow. "What are you going to do about Potter?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't been able to talk to him all weekend. He doesn't seem to be about."
"Apparently Snape has him locked up in his dungeon." Daphne said airily, picking at her nails. "Punishment for escaping detention to watch the Quidditch final or something."
I sat up abruptly, letting the cushion fall from my lap. "What?! And you're only telling me this now?!"
"I haven't seen you!" She protested. "You've been AWOL since the game."
"BECAUSE I WAS LOOKING FOR HARRY!"
My friends bar Blaise all snickered and I felt my face flush as I sat back against the sofa, trying to act cool. "I mean... you know, just seeing if he's about."
Pansy looked at me, a smirk playing at her lips. "Merlin girl, you've really got it bad for the Chosen One, haven't you?"
"No." I said stubbornly and unconvincingly. "He's just a good ride, that's all."
"I knew it," Millicent smirked.
I scowled at her.
"I'm going to bed!" I huffed, reaching down to grab the fallen cushion, making sure to toss it at Millicent's head as I got to my feet and stropped away.
******
Monday morning, I awoke with butterflies of anticipation in my stomach.
Even though it had only been two days, I was dying to see Harry again. A part of me was nervous, wondering if he'd be annoyed by my outburst which had led to the school finding out about us.
But I reminded myself that he had stood there and declared his feelings out loud, that he had publicly chosen me over Ginny.
However... he'd had two days to stew on it. What if he'd changed his mind and decided that I wasn't worth the hassle after all? He'd enjoyed sneaking around. Maybe now we didn't have to do that, the whole dalliance will have lost its shine.
I was so preoccupied with thoughts of Harry, my eyes nervously flitting over to the Gryffindor table during breakfast waiting for him to appear, that I got quite the fright when my mother's owl swooped into the Great Hall and dropped an envelope onto my toast.
With shaking hands, I tore it open, knowing that any news my mother sent was not going to be good.
Dear Draya,
I write with a fretful urgency. Your godfather has sent news of which I find highly concerning, that instead of doing what needs must, you have been cavorting around with Harry Potter. I pray that he is mistaken, for you must realise how dangerous this could be to us, Draya.
And need I also remind you that he is the reason your father is in prison, and Lucius would see it as a great betrayal.
I am putting all my faith and trust in you to do the right thing for our family, Draya. Do not let me or your father down.
Not wanting to read anymore, I screwed it up in my hand, shaking with emotion as I glared over at Snape at the teachers table. That bastard snitch! Just because he's still a virgin.
"Look, here comes Potter!" Daphne said as she excitedly tapped my arm. "Do you think he'll come over and give you a morning kiss?"
My gaze shot to the entrance of the Great Hall, my stomach immediately doing somersaults as Harry strode in; Granger and Weasley on either side of him, the power of their entrance causing heads to turn.
The three of them came to a dramatic halt as Harry's eyes scanned the room. I found my heart thudding, waiting to see where his green eyes would land.
"Is it just me?" Pansy drawled in my ear, "or does Potter ooze an extra amount of arrogance than usual?"
My heart raced as Harry's gaze finally fixed on mine, his expression hungry and intense.
I swallowed.
"Oh my fuck," Millicent said under her breath, "what I wouldn't give for him to look at me like that."
"Hey-" Goyle spluttered. "I'm right here!"
I watched as Harry leaned down to whisper something in Hermione's ear, and from the way she threw me an icy glare, I guess it'd been about me. She answered him with a curt nod before grabbing Ron's arm and dragging him off towards the Gryffindor table.
Harry, however, remained where he was, his eyes back upon mine as he beckoned his head.
"Lucky bitch," Pansy muttered as I obediently rose to my feet.
"You're not seriously just going to go to that tosser?" Blaise snarled, his voice spiked with anger.
"Why not?" I snapped at him, feeling fed up with his attitude. "You heard him Saturday - he wants this too. Why can't you just grant me this small bit of happiness like the others?"
A muscle along Blaise's clenched jaw twitched. "You're making a big mistake, Dray." He gritted, barely moving his lips. "It's going to end in tears."
"My mistake, my tears." I answered stoutly, glaring at him defiantly.
"I think it's romantic," Daphne swooned dreamily. "Two enemies of the state... coming together despite all the odds."
"Unbelievable," Blaise muttered, giving his tongue an impatient click.
My heart raced in anticipation as I left my friends and walked towards Harry. I could feel hundreds of pairs of eyes on me, the Great Hall hushed as everyone watched me go to the waiting Gryffindor. I wished they'd all mind their own business. No doubt Snape was furiously scribbling another note to my mother on the back of his breakfast napkin.
Before I reached Harry, however, he turned on the spot and started towards the Entrance Hall. I followed, my eyes trained on his cute arse as I did so, ignoring the silence that followed us.
The second we stepped out of the Great Hall, Harry reached out and grabbed my hand, tugging me close to his side, his pace suddenly taking on an urgency.
"Where are we going?" I asked, hurrying to keep up with him, my stomach bubbling with anticipation.
"Somewhere where no one can hear you screaming out my name."
There was no mistaking the hungry growl in his voice.
The second we entered the Room of Requirement, his lips were upon mine, devouring me as his fingers tugged at my clothes and tangled in my hair.
"Wait- shouldn't we talk first?" I asked, my voice muffled against his lips.
"I don't want to talk, I just want to fuck."
He picked me up and threw me hard down on the bed, crawling over me as his mouth hungrily found mine again, his kiss eager and forceful, his body literally a hot ball of sexual energy.
I could feel the mad pounding of his heart beneath his hard chest, the prominent rise and fall of his lungs as his breathing became increasingly jagged and fierce.
To say he was hungry for a fuck was an understatement, and when he growled in my ear that he needed to be inside me, I pooled with utter longing, my own desire lit.
It was fast, and it was furious, with Harry literally roaring like an angry lion as he tore off my clothes and pushed into me. Must of been one of those sound-producing sweets. It was kind of hot, if not a little weird.
Afterwards, we lay panting, our bodies entwined in a damp, sweaty mess, both of us too utterly exhausted to speak.
After a while I noticed he was lazily tracing patterns along my arm, his fingers softly grazing my blemished skin, dancing along the cruel black ink inflicted by my 'master'. When I turned my head to look at him, I noticed a sadness in his expression as he gazed at me, a conflicting war of emotions flashing behind his green eyes.
"Talk to me," I whispered, reaching up to brush his hair away from his brow, revealing his own mark left by the man who taunted us both. "Tell me what you're thinking."
His eyes widened, a twitch of a smirk at his lips. "You, Draya Malfoy, want to talk about feelings?"
"No, I want to talk about you. Maybe even us."
I did not miss the way his gaze flicked back down to my Dark Mark as he hesitated in his response.
I looked away, desperate not to reveal how his silence stung. "So Weasley and Granger have disapproved of you banging a Malfoy?" I sneered. "Figures."
"Draya," Harry said sternly, addressing me like one would address an unreasonable toddler. "This has nothing to do with Ron and Hermione. This is about the fact that you are a Death Eater and therefore are my enemy."
"So?" I snapped, turning to glare at him. "What do you want me to do about it? I didn't exactly have a choice, you know! I was pinned down by my aunt and watched on by my weeping mother. Has it never occurred to you that maybe that does not make me your enemy but rather someone who has been forced into a situation they never wanted to be in? In fact, this has nothing to do with you, you self centred prick! Funnily enough, You-Know-Who has other items on his agenda - you're not always at the top. Actually, sometimes, you're not even on it at all!"
Harry blinked, taken aback by my outburst. I, however, didn't wait for him to respond, instead I furiously jumped out of bed and snatched up my clothes, not caring if I looked like a raving lunatic.
"What other items?!" Harry called as I stormed into the bathroom and slammed the door. "What's on his agenda?!"
He was already dressed when I stropped back out into the room ten minutes later. He rounded on me instantly, blocking my path so I couldn't escape. There was a whiff of desperation about him.
"Look, we'll go to Dumbledore." He said at once, clutching my upper arms, his fingers digging into my flesh. "He'll be able to help you... get you the best protection. I even have a house. Sirius left it to me. You can stay there."
His eyes flickered around my face, his expression almost pleading. But I was never going to say what he wanted to hear, and I knew that, deep down, he knew that too.
"And what about my mother?" I said quietly as I looked up at him. "Or my father? They are relying on me, Harry, and I won't turn my back on them."
"But they are the ones who have put you in this danger in the first place!" Harry spluttered, letting go of me to step back and drive his hands through his hair. "How could you even contemplate protecting them?"
"Because they are my parents!" I hissed angrily, frustrated that he couldn't seem to understand. "Not that I'd expect you to know much about that."
It was a low blow, I knew. But Harry was backing me into a corner, and lashing out where it hurt was the only way I knew how to protect myself.
Harry hid his face behind his hands and groaned loudly.
"Draya," he said eventually, lowering his hands to look at me, his expression tired, "you've got to listen to me. This... this path you're choosing to take, it'll only take you away from me."
"You think I have a choice?" I choked, the word wobbling dangerously as it passed my lips. "Because the way I see it, Harry, I don't. I've never had a choice."
He sadly shook his head. "There's always a choice. And I'm offering you one now. Come with me to Dumbledore. I'm sure he can offer your mother protection-"
"Oh, for fuck's sake," I snapped, finally losing my patience. "You literally have no idea! My mother will never betray my father, and I will never betray her!"
A shadow fell instantly across his face, his green eyes turning hard and cold. "Then you choose to betray me."
I wanted to slam my head against the wall. Harry would not budge and neither would I.
"Well, then I guess that's that." I said stubbornly.
"I guess that is, then." His voice was cold, matching my stubbornness.
For a hot second, we just looked at one another. And then, without another word, I pushed past him and left, desperately trying to ignore the stinging sensation behind my eyes and the painful lump in my throat.
It was like the handshake all over again. Rejected by Harry Potter all because I couldn't be the person he wanted me to be.
******