The dreaded week was finally here and I struggled as I made my way on set. My new assistant Tania was happily waiting for me at the gate entrance with coffee and my schedule. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the fact that every single emotional scene had been scheduled for this week.
Friday was going to be the worst. My audition scene and the break up scene. I always related it back to my dad's passing. No matter how hard I tried to pick a different place to pull the emotion from, this was where I found it.
Tania was super on top of things, scrolling through her little iPad schedule, "So you have to be in wardrobe right away, I'll take all your stuff to your dressing room. I'll bring breakfast to hair and make up. You'll be out of your dressing room mainly today. Do you need me to add anything to your rider for the week?"
"Just make sure I have water. I'm going to be crying a lot this week. I need to stay hydrated. Only one coffee per day, so maybe some Coke Zero for when I need the caffeine boost please."
"Got it! Okay, now hurry hurry to get dressed." She smiled, taking my bag from me.
"Oh wait, charger! My phone is dying." I pulled the charger out of the bag and smiled as she ran off.
I missed having Des around, but Tania was nice.
I walked into wardrobe and got my outfit on for today. I texted Tania that I needed her to pick up my outfits for the rest of the day while making my way to hair and make up.
I walked in hugging Natalie and Chris, and just like the past week, an iced coffee waited for me on the little table in front of my chair.
"Still not going to drink it?" Chris smirked at me as he straightened my hair.
"Chris, stop instigating." I smiled a little as Harry walked in to get his hair and make up done.
"Morning everyone, Mer."
"Morning Harry," said Natalie and Chris.
Chris tugged my hair softly, and I glared up at him, rolling my eyes and I said softly, "Morning."
Natalie worked on Harry's make up as Chris finished up my hair. I appreciated this, because she would block his face from the mirror in front of us.
"Alright all done, just need makeup."
Natalie moved behind Harry checking her work in the mirror, "Okay, we can switch, he looks good. Alright missy, you got crying this week, so we need all the waterproof."
They switched positions and Harry cleared his throat, "You ready for this week Mer?"
"Yup. Good at being sad."
My words came out stronger than I expected and Natalie's eyes widened a bit at me.
"Mhm," was the only response I got from Harry.
He finished before me today, and walked out without saying bye to anyone. Chris stepped in front of me with his arms crossed, "Little miss thing, he's trying so hard with you! What is your problem?"
I looked up at Chris and bit my lip, "It's complicated okay. I'm not just being mean to be mean."
"Hmmm," Chris said, walking away to clean up Harry's station.
—
"No, no, no! The tears need to come more naturally Myra. You're forcing it too much, cut, cut, cut!" Olivia yelled at me for the 10th time.
At this point, my tears were more real than anything, and my frustration was growing stronger. Everyone had given up on correcting her when it came to my name, and I didn't even care anymore.
"Olivia, I've taken every change you've given me. To the point that I haven't even stopped crying in between takes. I don't understand what more you are looking for." I said as calmly as possible.
"Of course you don't, let's take a ten everyone." She rolled her eyes, turning to whisper something to her assistant.
I took a deep breath walking off the set and heading out of the sound stage. I needed the fresh air, and I needed it now.
I pushed the door open and and took a deep breath as the cold valley air hit me and I felt myself start to cry again. I felt so tired. We had been on the same shot for two hours, and I knew I was doing my job. I knew I was performing how I should. No matter how much she was trying to get me to snap, I wasn't going to allow it.
I heard the door open behind me and I quickly wiped away my tears.
"You okay Mer?" It was my co-star Cassidy.
I nodded, putting on a fake smile, "Yeah, just tired honestly."
She leaned against the railing with me, "She's been extra hard on you for no reason. I don't get it. That last take was literally your best."
I smiled a small real smile at her, "Thanks Cassidy," I took a deep breath and let it out slowly , "We should get back inside before she sends a search party.
As we made our way back in, Tania ran up to me with a scared look on her face.
"Hey Tania, you okay?"
"Liv wrapped you for the night."
"What? But we didn't even make it past what we were just doing."
"She just called it out."
I closed my eyes and shook my head. I bit my lip opening my eyes, "Thank you Tania. Can you make sure my stuff is packed up please?"
Cassidy shook her head at me and rolled her eyes, "Just know, no matter what she tells Scott, we have your back."
"Thanks Cass, I'll see you tomorrow."
—
Olivia's torture continued the rest of the week, and from what I heard around the set, Harry had blown up on her on Wednesday.
It was the end of the week, and I was exhausted. Having to be emotional all week had left me actually feeling sad, and today being the day we would be filming my original audition scene, I wasn't prepared at all.
I walked into hair and make up today, and a coffee and an almond croissant was waiting for me with a note like always. I bit my lip grabbing the note before I sat down.
Today will be okay. Honestly. xH
I closed my eyes to stop the tears, placing the note down and drumming my fingers on the table, before picking up the iced coffee and taking a sip.
So much better than set coffee.
I wrapped the napkin around the bottom of the cup and grabbed the croissant sitting in my chair. I placed my coffee between my legs, taking a bite of the croissant and I couldn't help but smile. I needed this little pick me up.
Chris walked in before anyone and smiled as he caught me taking a sip from my coffee.
"You're lucky Miss Other Thing has been giving you a hard time, so I'm not going to say anything else."
I rolled my eyes and lifted my croissant up at him offering him some. He flipped it around to the side I hadn't bit and ripped off a piece, popping it in his mouth.
"Oh my gosh, that's good."
Before I could say anything, we heard Harry's voice at the door, "Beachwood, best almond croissants." He smiled at us sitting in his chair.
"He's right, you know. I've given up on trying to get them anywhere else." I smiled softly at Chris as he got the curling iron ready.
Chris started on my hair, and Harry stared silently at his phone. I took a deep breath, and decided to be the bigger person, "Thanks for the coffee, H."
He looked up and over at me through the mirror, "Of course." He smiled softly before looking down at his phone.
I felt my heart flutter softly, and I looked down at my phone, realizing how much I missed those dimples.
—
I held onto Harry tightly as we filmed this scene. He leaned in to kiss me and once again, like every time before, Olivia yells cut before it happens.
I let go of Harry and he sighed brushing his hair out of his face. We both wiped our tears and make up hurried over to fix our faces again.
"Myra, can I ask you something?" Olivia yelled out to me.
Natalie cursed multiple things under her breath before nodding that she was done.
"Yes, Olivia, ask away." My tone was sarcastic, but I didn't care anymore.
"Tell me, do you have feelings? Have you ever cared for someone so much and then you lost them? Never to see them again? Cause if you have I don't believe it. No realness there."
I felt myself hold my breath as she said this, replaying the day my dad died in my head. His wake. His closed casket because we couldn't see his body.
"Liv stop." I heard Harry say.
"No, she needs to pull emotion from somewhere. Heartbreak? Heart ever been broken? Has someone passed away? Just give me something to work with!"
I felt the tears sting in my eyes as I tried to fight them back.
"Olivia I'm serious, stop it. You don't know what you're talking about." I heard Harry say again, his voice a higher octave.
"I just want to know. So I can get some real emotion out of her."
"My dad died the day I auditioned with this scene. I booked the role with this scene. With my real emotions. I go there every time and replay that day every time I do this scene, Olivia."
"Well I don't believe you do, Myra."
"That's enough Olivia!" Harry yelled at her, stepping in front of me, and getting in her face.
I felt the tears coming down my cheeks and I couldn't control them anymore. I knew everyone was staring and it made the situation even worse. I wanted to run, but my body felt frozen.
"Everyone is wrapped, wrap the set now!" Olivia yelled and everyone moved their way out of the situation but no one rushed.
"How dare you embarrass me like that Harry, in front of everyone?" She hissed quietly at him.
"Like you just did and have been doing all week to Miera. Funny how you forget her name here but have no problem using it when you're complaining to me about her." He said loudly to her.
Everyone was taking their time leaving the set, eyeing the situation and listening in. She stayed quiet looking stunned at him.
Aware of the people around him, he lowered his voice for only Olivia and myself to hear, "Tomorrow Liv. Make the appointment. I'm done with this. No more excuses. Or I will call and make it myself."
She peered over at me past Harry and I watched as he moved to block her view of me.
"Leave Olivia."
I heard her turn and leave, and once she was gone, everything holding me up gave up and I fell to my knees, my face in my hands as the tears kept flowing. I felt myself really sob and soon Harry's arms were wrapped around me.
"Honey, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." He kept whispering to me softly, "I should've never left you, I'm sorry. I should have never chosen her."
"Harry I just want to leave please, I just, I don't think I can drive. But I wanna go home. My home. Please."
"I got you, come on."