Before I proceed I just want to thank you guys soooooo so much for the 1000+reads. You guys are literally the best. Love y'all.
How could he do that? Why did he do that?
A few minutes ago ,I watched as the warriors dragged Jaxon out of the pack.
Xerxes seemed unmoved as if this was a normal occurrence taking place but unfortunately it wasn't. Jaxon was his best friend yet he banished him and I felt as if it was all my fault.
I caused this. I am the cause of this.
"Don't overthink this"
Xerxes's voice brought me back to reality. He was staring at nothing straight ahead.
Maybe he regretted his impulsive decision.
"Why did you do that?" I whispered, still in shock
"He was going to mark you!" he growled
His shoulders looked tense and his jaw was clenched. He balled his fists and his breath sounded labored
"Xerxes" I called out
He let out a sharp exhaled and turned to look straight at me.
"Andrea"
The way my name rolled off his tongue sent shivers down my spine.
You must stay focused Andrea!.
"Why did you stop him?"
"I don't know"
"Xerxes tell me the truth, why did you stop him?"
"Enough! You are a pack member and he is an unmated wolf. You are not his mate and what he was about to do is considered as one of the greatest offenses that can ever be made in this pack. You would have been marked as his without your consent and would have suffered for the rest of your life as his. Is that reason good enough for you Andrea?" He spat out
I lacked words and did what I was best at at this point in my life.
I walked away.
I didn't care about what he thought anymore. I don't know how many times I had told myself that.
The guy was just complicated. All he ever told me were hurtful words and very demeaning things yet his actions said the opposite.
I didn't know why I felt sad and hurt. I don't even mean anything to him. I'm just a useless pack member who is more of a liability to him.
I'm clumsy and I can't do anything right and I'm not worth anything and I ...
"Are you okay Andrea ?"
"Jake?"
"Why are you crying?"
"I am not and young man , aren't you supposed to be training?"
"Hyperthetically speaking, if that's even a word, I am way taller than you Andrea and I took it upon myself to skip it because apparently my alpha and ex beta were killing each other at the front of the orphanage"
"I guess news travels fast huh?"
"I felt the bond break ,I guess everyone did so as well"
That made me feel ten times worse . I wasn't going to cry In front of him though.
Because that would be embarrassing.
"Andrea I didn't mean to..."
"It's okay Jake ,just umm ensure the little ones are fine okay"
I needed to get to my office fast. My control was slipping. I didn't want to be a crying mess In front of everyone.
I'm a bad bitch. I got a reputation to uphold.
That's when I heard sniffling. On identifying the source, my heart broke.
It was Amaya. She was one of the disabled children in the orphanage. She couldn't speak . She was only three though and to make matters worse ,I didn't know how to help her most of the time.
I remember a time I asked the children to draw pictures of memories they had before coming to the orphanage.
She drew three graves . One was for her father,the other one was for her mother and the one in the middle she wrote....'me'.
I had to be strong for the both of us
"Amaya ,dear" I tried to sign as I tapped her back.
She got startled but on realizing that it was just me she calmed down.
She stretched out her hands and I took it as a cue to carry her . She rested her head on my neck and broke down softly.
I walked with her into my office and sat on my armchair.
The sounds of her sobs broke my restraints. I cried for her and maybe myself and us.
All the anger, frustrations, pain and hurt came out through those tears and at some point Amaya stopped crying and used her tiny little hands to rub my shoulder.
I opened my eyes and looked at her honey brown eyes. No words needed to be said or signed.
She used her hands to wipe my tears away . I did the same with hers and a tiny smile formed on her lips.
"What happened dear?" I signed
She shrugged
"Is it the other kids?"
She looked at me then nodded
"Well don't worry sweety ,soon a really nice family will come and take you home"
She shook her head
"Don't you want to have a family?"
She shook her head and pointed her finger at me.
"You want me to be your mommy honey"..
She nodded and looked at me with hopeful eyes.
At the age of eighteen was I really ready to take care of a child.
The answer would be...of course not. My life was already a mess, how would I be able to handle her.
Anyways hope is key to children. I wouldn't want to crush her sweet soul
"Fine dear, when the time comes I would definitely be your mommy"
Hopefully I get my shit together by then
She nodded then smiled. I looked at the time and realized that it was a half past eight.
How long were we in here?
"Honey are you hungry?"
She nodded
"Okay, let's go get you something to eat before getting you to bed"
I took her into my arms and left the office. After making sure she had eaten and taken a bath ,I put her to sleep and returned to my office.
On opening the door, I felt enraged
"I've been waiting for you" said the Alpha having a smug look on his face.
I don't have the energy for this
"Get your ass out of my fucking office"