Charlie kept trying to convince himself that it was just a mere compliment.
Stupid, it wasn't even a compliment!
But his mind refused to believe it and a voice inside his head kept telling him that it meant more than just that.
He felt like he was on cloud seven, having heard something like that from Trevor himself. The fact that he thought Charlie was good looking brought a tingling sensation inside him. It felt amazing to be alive.
It was things as silly as this that gave him butterflies in his stomach. And he hated it for God's sake.
What? Doesn't boys compliment each other often?
He asked himself and almost immediately, a voice popped up in his head telling him otherwise.
Of course, they do. But it is Trevor we are talking about. A guy who wouldn't even apologize without cursing under his breath.
Charlie threw a bottle at the wall of his bedroom and screamed into his pillow. He was getting really weary from all the thinking.
He made muffled voices out of annoyance. Out of nowhere, he felt a strange feeling inside of him. He was tired of just assuming things and being kept in the dark. He wanted to make sure of what exactly was going on. He stood up with a determined face and took out his phone.
He's gonna put an end to this whole drama.
He texted Trevor a 'Hey'.
He vaguely wondered if he would even send a reply. Worse, he was anxious that Trevor might leave his message on read. That would give him the worst feeling ever...
He had to wait for another few restless minutes before Trevor saw his message.
A question mark was his reply.
Well, it's a miracle that he even replied, right?
'Can I ask u something?' Charlie could already feel the inside of his palms getting all sweaty and cold. A voice inside his head kept screaming at him to back off from whatever it was that he was planning to do.
Another question mark.
Charlie let out a deep, shaky breathe.
Here goes.... Everything.
'Do you like me?' It took him another few minutes of his fingers lingering over the send button before actually sending it.
He send the message and regretted doing it almost immediately. His heart almost stopped beating and then took a fast pace in literal seconds. It was beating out of his chest. He thought of deleting the message as he felt a foul taste in his mouth. But unfortunately for him, Trevor had already seen the message. He started typing and Charlie's heart leaped into his throat.
His heart threatened to break out of his chest as it beat rapidly inside his ribs.
He dropped his phone on to his laps and started pulling at his hair hard, cursing his own stupidity.
Damn it, damn it!
What was he even thinking?!
A moment later, his phone beeped and he immediately took it and glanced into the screen.
'What makes you think so?'
What makes me think so? Everything, Trevor, Fricking EVERYTHING!
But he was not courageous enough to type in what he thought.
'I was just asking =D'
Charlie wondered how a simple emoji could hide away what you are actually feeling on the inside.
'Well, I don't. And stop thinking up weird stuff, Charles, it's annoying'
Charlie's breathe hitched and his mouth went dry. Now he made himself look like a creep.
All for nothing.
He pursed his lips and started to type in a message. He didn't quite know what to tell him even.
'You know, nvm. Actually, Jia dared me to ask u that XD'
What a stupid excuse to come up with...
He could not believe he was actually putting the blame on his long-time friend, just to cover up the bullshit he had caused.
'After all the fuss she made last time?'
' Yeah, ikr. She could be a real pain in the neck sometimes'
Now, you're badmouthing her.
Charlie slapped himself.
When Trevor left him on read, he started to type in another message. He was desperately trying to make things seem cool.
'Alrighty, see ya in school tomorrow, Gud ni8!'
'Yeah'
Charlie shut his phone down and threw it behind him. He didn't care where it fell. There was a lot of other things racing through his mind at the moment.
Disappointment washed over him and a lump raised into his throat.
He lied down, hugged his knees and wondered why on Earth he even kept his hopes up.
He felt tears prick his eyes as he continued to curse himself and this whole situation he was trapped in.
If it was just that one moment as Trevor had said, why can't he let it go?
Fuck it, he is not stupid!
Trevor is a big fat liar. That asshole just can't see what is right under his nose. He sure acts different around him, so why can't he just accept the truth?!
Charlie whimpered and at some point as disturbing thoughts flooded his mind, he drifted off, his knees still propped upto his chest.