Mew had certain expectations. Those expectations led to certain assumptions. For instance, while promoting the idea of UPS's, he'd assumed that every clinic would have access to the main power grid. All they had to safeguard against, were fluctuations in the supply.
Or, while suggesting he and Korn take a break from sex, he'd assumed a cooperative libido.
He'd been wrong—on both counts.
Mew had to force himself to focus on the problem he could solve. There were plenty of clinics without the convenience of electricity. Some were lucky enough to have found a benefactor; local NGOs, groups of well-wishers, or a timely government donation. Those had generators with their additional fuel costs at the expense of already cash-strapped clinics. Mew's quest to provide services wasn't just about the equipment. He needed some way to ensure the equipment worked.
"We seriously have to consider using solar panels and inverters," he said to his boss. "The initial cost is higher but once they are installed, the maintenance is insignificant."
"Is this in addition to all the other things we wanted?"
"That's just it, once they have a steady power supply, they won't need much else from us. At least not in terms of equipment. They can afford to buy what they need as long as they can actually use it."
"You're saying the outreach would not involve us giving them equipment it would involve us giving them solar-based power units?"
"I still like the idea of providing a combo pack. Why not kill two birds with one stone." That was becoming his favourite phrase in the whole world.
"You mean, provide the power supply as part of every purchase?"
"Exactly. Those who don't want the inverter or the UPS get different a price. But we make it a worthwhile bargain for anybody who wants the full package."
His boss was happy.
He was happy—enough.
Armed with the first of many examples he planned his second training session a little further afield. Mew had the same intention of using Chiang Mai as his jump-off point—but he couldn't get the thought of seeing Korn far enough at the back of his mind to keep his cock from swelling at the mere thought.
"I'll drive through Chiang Mai on Friday but I won't be able to stop. I'll see you on Saturday after the training. Is that okay?"
"Absolutely. Do you have any idea what time?"
"Sometime after lunch. Maybe three-ish. It all depends on how things go."
"Sounds like a plan," Korn answered.
It was. Mew would have loved to see as much of Korn as possible. This was the next best thing. They could spend one night together if he was with Korn on Saturday night and didn't have to drive back to Bangkok until Sunday. The forced celibacy was wearing him down yet he wasn't tempted to find somebody else. He was too preoccupied with thoughts of Korn—and all the things that they could do together.
~
Korn had been trying to think of a reason to invite Mew to his house. It was a bad idea. He already knew that. At the same time, the whole moratorium on sex was ridiculous. He could not for the life of him remember why they'd agreed to do it. But it was that kind of thinking that had got them into trouble in the first place.
They had thought they were exempt from getting to know each other after so much time. Not going beyond the good or fun things; what they enjoyed or were happy to share. But there was so much it left out.
What was Mew like when he tired or relaxed? How did he behave when was stressed out; or frustrated? If there was anything true right now, it was the fact that Korn was both stressed out and frustrated. He didn't like it and he didn't want Mew to see him like that.
He still cleaned his house as soon as he got home from work on Saturday. He made sure the place was as close to spotless as it could get. Korn didn't want to think about his reasons for changing the bedsheets. He told himself he was trying to keep himself busy instead of thinking about what time Mew would show up. But even he wasn't buying his own bullshit.
Three-ish was so unspecific, that it only served to increase Korn's anxiety.
He was about to go down to the workshop when his phone rang.
"I was wondering if you'd had lunch yet. Should I pick something up?" Mew asked.
"No, I haven't eaten. Come over. We'll grab something on the way," Korn told him barely keeping his excitement in check.
"On the way?"
"I told you, I made plans. I'll tell you all about it when you get here."
Korn had planned the date as agreed but it wasn't a conventional one. He hoped that Mew wouldn't mind what he'd come up with.
"I'm here," The quick call was enough to get Korn's heart racing.
"I'll be right down." He grabbed his wallet and keys and took another look around his apartment. If everything went according to his plan, they would spend the rest of the evening there.
Mew looked dishevelled from his drive and in desperate need of a shower and a nap. A huge change from their first date. Korn had a moment of doubt but thought better of deciding for Mew.
"I'm going to put you to work," Korn said when he was comfortable in the passenger seat of Mew's company car, "I hope you don't mind."
"Do I have a choice?" Mew asked with a smile.
"Not even a little bit," Korn said, leaning into Mew's opening.
"Then point me in the right direction."
Korn did as asked. The closer they got, the more nervous he got.
"Is this a junkyard?" Mew asked when Korn showed him where to park.
He didn't look upset. He looked rather eager. Korn could finally breathe again. Taking Mew's hand, he walked in the direction of the small parts collection.
"What are we looking for?" Mew asked him before he could get very far.
"Right...I need a couple of old microwaves or just the transformers."
"Okay. Let's do this."
He hadn't expected Mew to just get on board. Seeing him roll up his sleeves, Korn joined in without another word. They were going through some old appliances together when Mew handed him what he needed.
"You're good at this."
"You seem to forget I dated a mechanic. I had to acquire a few skills."
"Peck made you do this too?"
"Not really. A lot of the time he did it because work demanded it. Someone who couldn't afford to buy the parts because they were too expensive or the car was old and they wanted equally vintage options. I got used to hanging out. Picking up a few things was incidental."
"So, this isn't boring for you? A reminder of things you'd rather forget?"
"No. I don't want you to feel like there's a part of you, you can't share with me. And to be honest I haven't done this in so long it's kind of fun. And I have to admit to having a slight investment in this."
"What do you mean?
"You mentioned shifting the grid to solar at the factory. I realised that a lot of the clinics aren't even on the grid in the first place. Solar power and options that are cheaper than all the expensive generators would help. If you have any ideas that can work in such an environment, wouldn't it be worth it to push them through? Get it patented? You could help a lot of people, not just CYZ and your neighbour's need for an automaton."
"Are you using me for your job?"
"Maybe. Just the same way you're using me for yours," Mew said giving Korn a wink that assured him there were no hard feelings about it.
"It's nice to be on the same page, isn't it?" Korn asked.
If he hadn't been standing so close to Mew, he would have missed his whispered, "You said it."
Korn shoved him playfully only to get the same treatment before Mew retreated to another side of the junk pile. They smiled at each across the distance before going back to rifling through the random appliance.
Korn had never felt this way before. He felt at ease in Mew's company in a way he had never been before. It felt good.
"Maybe we should stop," he called out to get away from the strange feeling. "There's a nice place to eat down the road. I'm kind of starving."
"I thought you were never going to mention it," Mew said with a put-upon sigh.
"If you were hungry, you should have said something."
"I said something...when I called you from the car. I just thought I had to earn my dinner."
"Yeah. I think you've earned it. Come on, I'll feed you."
Korn took Mew to one of his favourite restaurants. Although calling it a restaurant might have been elevating it too high. It was a food cart but the owner had rigged a tarp to form a makeshift awning and put chairs where a few people could sit. It wasn't fancy but the food was excellent.
Mew agreed the minute he took his first bite. Forgetting all decorum and making all the right noises. He was too busy enjoying his food to notice the effect they had on Korn. The fact that he wasn't doing it on purpose was even sweeter somehow. More attractive because of how unstudied his reactions were.
The last time he'd seen Mew so open was as a teenager. It was different now that he knew Mew had been through his own kind of hell. That he'd come out on the other side was a relief he didn't think he had a right to feel. But he was very glad they'd reconnected.
"Where are you staying?" Korn asked trying to sound casual.
"At the guest house. Just for the night," Mew answered.
The undercurrent between them was palpable. Those were not the plans either of them wanted, but they were the plans they needed to stick to.
"I'll drop you off," Mew said although it sounded more like a question.
The short drive was tense. The words hovered on the tip of Korn's tongue but he dared not say them out loud. A part of him hoped Mew would put him out of his misery and suggest something but his companion was equally mum.
"So—" It wasn't the most eloquent start but Korn was at a loss when they arrived at his building.
He wanted to ask Mew to come up. Invite him for a nightcap or a coffee or just...something. Mew seemed to feel the same way because he automatically stepped out of the car. They were at Korn's door when Mew stopped him before he could open it.
"I can't come in there. You know that."
"I do?"
"But you know I want to, don't you?" Mew asked.
Then why are we standing out here? Korn thought. But out loud he could only say what he knew was the right thing, "Yeah."
"Take care of yourself?"
"Absolutely. You better do the same."
"Definitely."
Mew leaned in for a kiss and Korn met him halfway. It was nothing like the peck they had shared in the car on their first date. This was hot, carnal, wet and wide. A precursor to so much more with nowhere to go. Mew pulled away first. His hands remained on Korn's chest pinning him on the edge of arousal.
"I have to go," he said. His strangled whisper was a gratifying reminder that Korn wasn't alone with his feelings.
"Yeah?" He asked breathlessly.
"Fuck."
With that one word, Mew turned and walked away.
Korn walked into his too neat apartment and stripped down quickly. Without stopping for anything else he jumped into the shower. The cold water cooled his skin—and his ardour. Knowing he could have been sharing the small space with Mew served to heat his blood instead of helping him tone things down.
He had a firm grip on his cock before he could talk himself out of it. Pleasuring himself with thoughts of what he could have been doing instead. The celibacy thing needed to stop. But Korn had chickened out instead of standing up for what he wanted.
Maybe Mew was right. Not about them not having sex; about them no longer keeping parts of themselves hidden. If they needed to stop having sex to have a real relationship then maybe that was the problem.
But Korn wanted Mew. That was no longer debatable. The only problem left, as far as he could tell, was their inability to communicate their desires as effectively as they should have.
~
In his guest room, Mew was coming to the same conclusion as his ejaculate spilt from his body and his cries of pleasure spilt from his mouth. There was no upside to holding back, just frustration.
At least he knew his limit.
After their truncated goodbye, he also knew where Korn's was.
They understood the place sex had in their relationship. They could do without it, even in the face of very real frustration but it probably wasn't a good idea to hold back anymore. They'd been willing to make that small sacrifice for the long-term benefits. Mew was ready for whatever those might be.
He first had to tell Korn he'd changed his mind.
[Author's note: It's not the best chapter but I realize if I wait for perfection, nothing will ever happen. Bear with me. I'd rather be less than perfect than not at all. 🙏🏾]