Everything's on fire.
You don't know how to stop it.
Everything's burning. Everything but you.
The walls, the floor, the air. The heat is indescribable. It fills the room and taints the air in your lungs. It's as if the flames are drawn to you, but they don't want to touch you. Or maybe they're coming from you.
Did I cause this?
You shrink away from the flames, backing as far away as you can to avoid touching them.
It's hard to breathe. Everything is filled with smoke. You can't see. It's too much.
"Din! Din!" you yell into the smoke. "Din, please! Help! Din!"
The only response is the crackle and roar of the flames as they intensify.
"Someone! Someone, please!"
Your voice becomes hoarse as you call out. The smog and ash stick to the inside of your mouth and throat as you struggle to breathe and scream. Strangled chokes and gasps for air entangle themselves with your words.
This isn't real. It's not real. It's another nightmare.
"Please-"
You can hear suffocating coughs and gasps for breath, and strained groans coming from the other side of the room, cutting through the sound of roaring flames. There's the clatter of metal against stone and a scream of anger that cuts through the smog.
And then the smoke cloud shifts to display a man, restrained with long thick chains to the floor by his wrists, struggling to rise and break away as the flames approach him. Squinting to see through the clouds of smoke, your eyes widen when you see who it is.
"DIN!"
He's fighting against the chains, trying to rip them up from the floor.
"DIN!" You run forward, stumbling back when a wave of fire explodes in front of you.
"ALORA!" His voice is hoarse and strained and you watch as his helmet whip up to search for you in the smoke. Fear and pain and dread doesn't just fill his voice - it overwhelms it. His entire being is afraid. Not for himself, but for you. Din lunges forward when his gaze falls on you, trying to break free once again. "ALORA!"
"DIN!" The flames are getting closer to him, but they aren't stopping in front of him as they do for you. The tongues of fire reflect in his visor as he stares at you in horror and dread at what will become of you if you stay.
The flames creep forward, moving so fluidly and smoothly that it's almost as if they were liquid. A river of heat and death that's lapping the riverbank, inching closer to Din.
No...
"ALORA! ALORA, GO! GET OUT OF HERE!" He strains against the chains again, backing away from the approaching flame until his chains were pulled taught. It laps at his feet, flicking up at him.
"DIN!"
The blaze catches the edge of his cape and starts to travel up his back.
"NO!" You lunge forward through the devouring waves of heat.
Din screams in pain as the fire spreads over his body.
"NO!" Your throat hurts from the straining of your voice and the poison of the smoke.
"AUGH, NO! ALORA, STAY AWAY! GO! GET OUT OF HERE-" His screams overlap his words as his knees buckle and Din collapses to the ground. The flames devour him, engulfing his body with the heat and hell.
"DIN-" Chains of your own appear around your neck and shoulders, pulling you to the ground as the flames around you roar and crackle louder.
No. Not again. Not again, not again, not again.
The horrific image in front of you flashes away for a moment, being replaced by one of similar nightmare. Din srawled on the ground like a starfish as flames flicker around him. The world flashes again and now it's Din propped against the wall as the building burns and he's bleeding. His blood covers your hands and you're shaking in agony.
No... No...
"DIN!" You struggle forward, pulling against the chains with all your might. Something clatters at your feet as you struggle, and you look down to see what it was and if it could help you escape your bonds.
Mandalorian helmets. Shattered and broken. They're scattered around you, splattered with blood and ash. Scorched and destroyed.
Your fault. It was your fault.
His body is flame now. Pure fire. And his screams rip through the air.
"ALORA!"
You bolt upright from the cot, frozen in fright. Your body shivers and trembles, and you find yourself not able to breathe.
There is movement by your side and your head whips around to look at it.
Din.
It was just a dream.
Letting out a shaky breath, you put your face in your hands as Din rolls closer to you, still fast asleep. His hand brushes your thigh as he searches for you in the space where you had been laying.
"Din," you murmur, taking his hand and stroking it with your thumb as he mumbles your name in his sleep. "You're okay. You're safe."
He can't hear you, obviously, but you don't need him to. The words are more for yourself to hear than for him.
Din hums in his sleep and the sound of it brings a smile to your lips. His arm snakes around your waist, pulling you closer to him, and you nestle into his arms. Pressing a soft kiss against his neck, you smile into his shoulder as Din sighs in sleepy contentment.
It was just a dream. He's okay.
The nightmares of Ari's death have lessened with time... but are now replaced by ones of Din.
It's been over a week since Nevarro. Since Gideon. Since the explosion. Since you'd nearly lost Din.
He claims that he's fine. His head injury has mostly healed, but the image of him lying in a field of flame and the words of him telling you to leave him to die haunt your dreams.
In every dream, he's dying because of you. And, every time you wake, the sight of him by your side calms you down and you're able to breathe again.
You haven't told him about the dreams. You're scared that if you do, the nightmares might become reality.
He was in that situation because of you. He laid his life on the line because of you. If he had died, his blood would've been on your hands.
It would be your fault.
That thought pops into your head whenever Din leaves the room to check on his injuries or goes to the shower. Whenever you saw the healing burns on his wrists from the explosion.
It was the weight in your heart when he had broken down upon returning to the Crest. When he grieved the Mandalorians who had died... died because of you. The way he had sobbed in your arms for his family. He had finally allowed his walls to break down - finally allowed himself to bear the heaviness of his emotions and grief. You had cried with him, guilt making each tear burn as it fell down your face. This was all your fault. Their deaths... Kuiil's death... Din's injuries...
He was there because of you.
And you don't know if you would be able to live yourself if he dies. You're barely able to grasp the fact that so many have died and endured pain because of your existence... because Din had taken you under his wing... because a Mandalorian had fallen in love with a Jedi.
Din lets out a soft sigh that distracts you from your grief-ridden thoughts. His arms tighten around you, as if he knew that you were in pain, and you allow yourself a moment of peace. To just focus on Din.
You can feel yourself drifting off in the safety and comfort of Din's arms. The warmth of his body and the sound of his soft snores make everything else fall away.
The galaxy is you and Din.
All of your worries and concerns are gone for a moment. You don't need anything more. Just Din. The realization hits you right as you slip into unconsciousness.
You've fallen in love with Din Djarin. Truly, fully, completely in love. The same way that one falls asleep. Slowly... and then all at once. And yet you haven't been hit with the realization yet.
A smile pulls at your lips as one last thought crosses your mind before sleep overwhelms your body.
Good night, my love.
~~~
Din
She's not telling me something. I'm not sure what, but there's something.
Alora has been acting strange when she wakes from her sleep. Din has woken up one night to see her sitting in the cockpit, staring out at the stars with glossed-over and distant eyes. Whenever Din asked her if the nightmares and memories still plagued her at night, her face would fall, she would say that she was fine, and then turn away from Din.
The nightmares are still going. I don't know why she's lying to me about it.
Din watches as Alora inspects her injuries. The burns have almost healed completely. The skin was a light red, and the other patches that were farther along in the healing process were dry and the dead skin was flaking away. Alora had joked about being a lizard when a piece of dead skin fell away and Din had shaken his head in amusement. Bacta treatments gave sped up her healing, and the weight in Din's heart, whenever he catches a glimpse of the injuries, started to lift as he watches them fade away. The bruises on her neck have faded as well. The markings of the heavy chains used to be a dark purple and blue, and now they were nothing but faded tinting of the skin.
Din's injury has mostly healed as well. The trauma he'd sustained to his head didn't give him a concussion, somehow, and the skin had started to knit back together within a couple of days. Alora had worried about infection and she'd fussed about Din not allowing his injury air to breathe by wearing the helmet all the time. At one point, she'd even shoved him into her room, begging him to let her clean his helmet and to have some time to himself to sleep and eat. He'd conceded eventually, removing his helmet when she turned her back, and leaving it at the door while he closed himself inside her quarters.
Even though he wasn't able to sit with her while she worked, he was relaxed by simply being around her belongings. They smelled like her - a weird thing to think about but it was something that Din was rarely able to experience. The helmet blocked out most scents since it filtered the air that he breathed. Din had forgotten how much of the regular parts of life had been revoked from his life by his way of life... by following the Creed.
She smells of lavender and forests. As if the trees of Endor follow her wherever she goes. It was a soft scent... not strong or overbearing. It was comforting. So Din sat in comfortable silence as Alora cleaned his helmet.
Now, Din watches Alora observe her injuries, unwrapping the last of the bandages from her arm. His gaze flickers over her face, traveling down her body to see the visible scars that decorated it.
This was his fault.
If I hadn't given her to that damn client... She wouldn't have those scars... She wouldn't have those burns... Why did I ever turn her in? What kind of person am I to do such a thing? And then to confess my feelings to her? As if I had never caused her this pain? That's monstrous.
Alora seems to sense his thoughts, as he watches her pause and her gaze turns distant as she stares at the wall.
"Don't think like that, Din," she murmurs, turning to look at him with sorrowful eyes.
"But it's true." His voice cracks in anguish as Din looks down in shame.
"No it's not," she whispers. Her eyes turn dark and downcast to the floor as if she was having similar thoughts.
"If I hadn't turned you in..."
"Then someone else would've. I'm glad it was you, and not someone else."
"Look at all this pain I've caused you! Look at your scars! I should've never given you over. I should've run away with you the first time. How can you sit there and have feelings for me after what I've done?!"
"How can I-... Din! You were doing your job! You didn't know who or what I was!" Shock riddles her features and her brows were knit together in frustration at what he was saying.
"I knew that I felt something for you! That you were different! I knew that you had done nothing wrong! That you were innocent! I knew it when you refused to kill me, even though you had the chance to."
"And thank the stars I didn't. Din, I've forgiven you. A long time ago. And I'm not innocent. I've caused harm to everyone and everything that I touch! If anything, you should be angry with me! Look at the life I've put you in! You've done nothing but run and fight ever since I came along! You've been blown up! Your people died because of me! If you hadn't saved me, they'd still be alive!"
"The life I had before wasn't living!" Din yells, matching her rising tone. Alora hesitates, her eyes widening as she stares at him. "I wasn't alive until you came along, Alora! You gave me a soul again!"
Tears well up in her eyes as she stares.
"My people made a choice! You didn't ask them for help. There was no deal. They did it on their own accord. That's what they do! They're meant to protect the innocent, which is what I should've done with you! I'm thankful that they died with honor! They died on their feet! None of it was your fault!"
The tears streaming down her face tell Din that she's not fully convinced. Maker, he wanted to rip off his helmet so she could see his eyes. So he can show her what she means to him.
"If it wasn't for you and the Child, I'd still be living without a soul. You've healed me... brought me back to life! I can feel again!"
Taking a step towards the Jedi and holding his arms outstretched towards her, Din watches as emotions flood her expression as she thinks over his words. Her eyes are scanning his visor, searching the darkness for his eyes. After a moment, she darts forward, tucking into his arms as soft sobs fall from her lips.
"Shh, it's okay... It's okay. I'm okay, you're okay. It wasn't your fault. Don't blame yourself for these things."
"If you had died back there..."
"But I didn't. I'm here... Because of you. You mean more to me... more than you could ever know."
"... I think I know," Alora chuckles, sitting back in Din's arms and giving him a bashful smile. Din wipes away a tear and cups her cheek. "I meant what I said... That I couldn't do it again..."
"I wouldn't be able to do it either..."