"Why?"
it takes time to heal, though that sentence mattered to me; my principles seemed to have taken a turn for the worst. nothing good will come out of a string tangled because of love
"hey, what's wrong?" Niki asked when he noticed me curled up against the windowsill; staring at the dark and upsetting sky, the fragments of my dishonoring feelings are taunting something inside me
I say these things and yet the yearning for his presence doesn't stop, I hate forcing myself, the pressure makes me want to throw up, I hate it, I hate him
No, you don't.
I sigh and place my head against the glass, my brother sat next to me "my mind is blank so don't talk to me" intrigued by my warning, he laughs
"Jungkook isn't any better than Taehyung" he knocked on my head and shrilled "for a man who can't change himself because you love him genuinely isn't enough"
"that's just manipulation"
I rolled my eyes "your point is?"
"Are you attached to him?" it took us a few minutes of silence before I laughed "and what makes you think so?"
"You clearly can't let that awful man go, can't figure out where to start when he leaves?" I simply took in a deep breath
At some point he may be correct, everything about Jungkook is nonsense now but then I'm used to it, I adjusted my eyes to the type of person that he is
Without him, I'm going to get a little confused at first
"Love isn't supposed to ruin your peace of mind" someone knocks on the door, and Niki gives me that bored look as he opens it.
Jungkook's figurative eyes dart to mine; he appears as charming as ever, classy, proper, and smiling, but something seemed off with me.
I had a different feeling
I asked "what are you doing here" as soon as his lips began to smile "I just wanted to see my girlfriend."
Right, we're in a relationship
"Well, you saw me now. what next?" I went up to him and asked, he's taller than me which makes me look smaller than before, his shoulders are broad and his arms are toned "let's go out?"
I don't want to
Niki suddenly stated an unspoken agreement between us "But we're going to the store to buy cookies" to which my brother grinned at "so, maybe next-"
"Oh" Jungkook laughed "then come with us, let's buy you cookies and eat outside." He was smiling so sweetly at me and my brother, but the look of guilt and shame was all over him.
What is he up to
We were left with no choice, but to come with him
While chewing on his cookies and watching Jungkook buy some waffles for us, Niki said "Yeah, I utterly despise him a lot, but don't you think he's being a little kinder than before?"
We've found ourselves in a park; I groan and cross my arms. "What makes you think he's being nice now. just because he bought you stupid cookies?"
"Hey! my cookies aren't stupid" my younger brother says with a pout. I sigh and turn my head to at least please my eyes, sooner or later I feel Niki nudging me "what?"
His eyes were set on something or should I say someone, my eyes followed his trail and soon felt my heart stop "it's Taehyungie! Yeheeey!"
Niki exclaims in joy and runs up to him, he looked at my brother first with joy then settled his warm eyes on me
He smiled with his teeth wide open and I looked away, clearing my throat as I take a step towards them. Jungkook turns around holding some waffles with the same blissful grin Taehyung had
"Baby, here" he handed me the waffles, I take it in my hands and accidentally met Taehyung's gaze before laughing nervously "what a coincidence" I say and no one laughed
that was awkward, I decided to eat instead when Jungkook slings his arm on my shoulder "so, where are you going now?" he asks while kissing the top of my head and Taehyung didn't miss that sight
He smiled "with you guys."
Please end me
We kept walking around places with Taehyung and Jungkook talking to each other, with Niki in between the two of them keeping up with the conversation
Leaving a quiet me from behind
I look at the man in front of me, Taehyung was wearing his cap backwards accompanied by a plain white shirt and pants. He didn't even put effort in dressing up but he still looks attractive
He smiled every time Jungkook did, the sound of his laughter was softly running through my ears "yeah man, I think so too"
He then turns to me with and urges me to walk next to him, I tried to ignore his gesture when I felt a tug on my wrist pulling me towards him
"be where I can see you" he boldly proclaims in front of Jungkook as Niki chokes on his own saliva, I laughed awkwardly in order to make it sound like a joke "yeah sure"
Last time I knew, we weren't in good terms
And now he acts as if nothing happened
"So, you two were on a date?" all of a sudden Taehyung brings up causing me to clench my fingers, Jungkook laughed "yes, and why?"
"I wouldn't really like to be a third wheel" he said causing Niki to snort all of a sudden, my insensitive brother catches my glare and zips his mouth "I'm the fourth wheel then, now we're a car"
No one laughed
We went inside a mall when Taehyung asked "anyways, where are we off to?" Jungkook turned to look at me and back at his supposed to be friend "actually, can you-"
His phone suddenly beeped and he sighs before checking it out, I give Taehyung an annoyed stare as he chuckles. What is he even doing here? damn party pooper.
"um, my mom asked me to buy something urgently, Tzuyu, come with me-" Jungkook touched my hand when Taehyung pulled on my other arm "go on your own"
I widen my eyes from the sudden outburst of his words, my mouth left wide open from surprise "what did you just say?" I felt Jungkook's touch on me grow tight causing me to hiss
"I said-"
"Hyung! I'll come with you because I-I missed hanging out together" Niki came in between with a shaky voice, he managed to laugh humorlessly at the scary man "come on, please"
Jungkook threw Taehyung a doubting glare before letting my brother drag him away from us in a hurry, my heartbeat increased from the shallow exchange of words "why did you say that?"
Did it give him an idea?
"I say what I feel, and I don't want him around" he says with furrowed brows while explaining "how did you know where we were? I will never believe that this is coincidence"
"coincidences don't exist, I stalked you."
"Taehyung!" I punched his arm and he laughed, rubbing the part I just punctured "just kidding, your brother snitched on you, he loves me"
"Why did you follow me?"
"I don't know, I hate it when he gets happy even if he doesn't deserve it" he scoffed
"even if he takes a change of heart, nothing will change the fact" he stopped all of a sudden
"The fact that?" I asked
He rolled his eyes "whatever, I just hate him" I look around the place and sigh "what do you want from me? last time I knew we weren't doing good"
"I already told you, it was my mom I had dinner with"
"Not just that"
He went silent for a while already knowing what I'm talking about "I apologize if I ever invalidated your feelings, I never intended to upset you that way"
"I'll make it up to you, I promise" he utters hastily
I looked into his eyes, as usual they were always warm yet lovely, the same gaze that pulled me into that cold paradise that soon burned me
His expression was blank, doe-eyes widening as he takes in my expression
"Hey" he said in a nervous tone
Breakups were generally easy as it took a lot for me to get attached but this one...it wasn't going too well
"You know well enough we're not friends right? Tzuyu, I was inlove with you and we both knew" he said in a quiet voice "I've had enough with trying to act as if nothing ever happened"
The people around us have no clue how much my heart is giving up on me, the beat that increases every second that comes by
In a noisy and crowded place
For once with him, it fell silent.
"can you please tell me?"
Would nothing change if I never left him?
"Why you had to leave?"