I was sitting on the couch, ready to watch a movie when Gemma rushed out of her room with a suitcase. I sat up quickly to see what was going on. "Is everything okay? Where are you going?"
"Eva and I are going to Vienna!" she exclaimed excitedly, "Eva wants to try different coffees and cafe type things." She waved it off. "I don't care. I'm going to Austria!"
My jaw dropped. "Austria? Like the country?"
"Yeah.." Gemma gave me a look. "Where else would I go to Vienna?"
"With Eva?" I clarified.
"Yes, idiot." She laughed as she checked her phone. "Speaking of the devil. She's here to pick me up."
Gemma started to walk towards the door, but she stopped when he hand was on the handle. I thought she was going to cancel the trip and stay home, but instead she smiled. "I'll see you in a week or so," she says, "Be safe. And don't do anything I wouldn't do."
Then she walked out the door.
Now I'm still sitting on the couch, and Gemma is in an airport headed towards Vienna, Austria.
I don't know why I don't feel worried for her; traveling without a plan isn't always safe. I don't know why I don't feel happy that she's traveling with her girlfriend. I don't know why I don't smile at the thought of having the apartment to myself.
Instead, I feel jealous. I feel conflicted.
I remember a time when Maggie and I used to sit on Pinterest and plan our trips that we were going to take. We promised we would travel together no matter who we were dating at the time. We were going to stick with each other no matter what.
Now I'm sitting by myself and the farthest I've traveled is three towns over to the beach. It's ridiculous. It feels like failure.
I sigh, setting my head back on the couch. I can't even think of somewhere to visit right now. No where that wouldn't feel like a betrayal to Maggie.
My phone rings. I almost think it's Gemma forgetting her passport, but instead I notice it's Nick.
"Hello?"
"Hey, what's up?" Nick says.
"Nothing much." I sit up straight on the couch. "Gemma decided to go to Vienna for a bit."
"Like Austria?"
I laugh at how I asked the same thing. "Yeah."
"Do you want me to come over?" he asks, hopeful. "We never get to see your place."
"What's wrong?" I ask. He's right, they never come over to my tiny apartment.
"You should be happy. I'm saving you gas."
I try not to notice the difference in his voice because I also don't really feel like being alone right now. All I can think of is Maggie right now, and I don't want to think about that right now.
"Alright, come on over then."
Nick appears at my door about thirty minutes later. He's leaning on the frame when I open it. Two bottles of tequila in hand; one appearing to have already been partially drunk.
"Did you drive here?" I ask, the panic in my voice very obvious.
"No, I got a cab," he says slowly, "Don't worry about me, y/n."
I let him in the apartment, already worried, but I think he's on the right track. I did say I didn't want to think right now. I'm safe to drink in my own apartment.
"Got shot glasses?" he asks, rummaging through my kitchen.
I follow him into the kitchen and get the glasses down. He takes off his jacket and fans his face.
"It's hot in here," he says.
I shrug. Gemma likes it a little chillier, but I've never been a fan of the cold. I watch as he places the jacket on the back of a dining room chair. He turns and gives me a smile before going to pour the drinks.
He hands me a shot and raises his own. "To your miniature apartment."
I laugh but still cheers his glass. "It's not that small."
He gives me a look, holding the bottle up to refill. "It barely fits us in it, y/n."
_ _ _
MANY SHOTS LATER...
I laugh loudly as Nick explains a story about a frog that he saw on his window. He uses his hands to show details, each part funnier than the other.
When he's done, he lets out a long sigh and lays back on the couch. "Ugh, that hurt my arms and legs.
"Your legs?" I ask, "Why would a story you tell while sitting hurt your legs?"
He shrugs. "Because it does."
I lay with my back to the couch as well. He look at the ceilings, noticing some sort of water stain in the corner.
"You know what I find funny?" Nick asks, his words slurring together.
I smile. "What?"
"That we are besties because... because I sent you one little message." Nick puts his pointer finger and thumb close together for emphasis. "And yet Clay has some sort..." His voice fades for a second.
I sit up for a second, noticing his eyes are now closed. I laugh and shake him. "Wake up loser."
He blinks a couple times before making eye contact with me. "We should call him."
My brows furrow. "Who?"
"Clay block."
I smack the pillow next to me excitedly. "It's Thursday!"
"Thursday!" Nick sits up and smiles. He grabs the arm rest for support.
"We have to call him." I start searching for my phone.
"Yes, yes." Nick nods dramatically, then stops for a second. "Wait, what's on Thursday?"
"Clay's at his parents house for dinner," I say with a hint of duh.
Nick laughs. "You're right." He picks up his phone. "And it's only midnight, so he'll probably be coming home, too."
"It's perfect."
The phone rings three times before Clay picks up.
"CLAY!" Nick screams immediately. "Are you on the way home from your mommy's house?"
"What?" Clay say quietly. His voice is a bit deeper, like he was sleeping. "My families on vacation, and it's two in the morning."
I look at Nick. "You said twelve."
He shrugs. "Must've missed a one."
Nick hands me the phone. "I'm thirsty."
"Are you guys drunk?" Clay asks. "Where are you?"
"We're at y/n's," Nick calls out. "There's no AC and it's super small."
"It's actually cold in here, Nick." I roll my eyes. "You're just really-"
"Hot?" he raises his brows before sitting down again, forgetting his water.
"No." I roll my eyes. I turn back to Clay. "What are you doing?"
"I was sleeping," he says. "What are you doing?"
"Well, we were drinking and thinking about things," I explain. I glance over to Nick, noticing he's laying down again. I groan. "Ugh, Nick fell asleep again."
I set the phone up so Clay can see us both before I nudge Nick. "Wake up, we're talking to Clay." I laugh as his head falls back a bit. "Come on, Nick, it's considered rude not to talk to him."
He still doesn't move. I pat his shoulder. "Nick?"
"Is he not waking up?" Clay's voice is filled with panic.
"No?" I ask in the form of a question.
"Is he breathing?" Clay asks.
I myself am breathing hard, so I can't hear anything when I put my ear to his chest. My head is dizzy. I shouldn't have drank anything.
I look back at Clay, noticing there's a light on now from his side of the call. He's walking up the stairs.
"Is he?" Clay repeats.
I shrug. "I don't know."
He grunts as another light turns on. "George wake up," he says, "It's Nick, come on."
There's some complaints that I can't quite make out. I just want to sleep. Nick's sleeping, so I want to sleep too. I lean back.
I relax on the pillows as Nick has. I close my eyes, trying to find sleep.
"I'm calling 911," I hear someone on the phone say. "They'll get there faster than us."
"Well, it's better to be safe than sorry."
"y/n."
I think I've decided Paris seems like a good place to go. I remember telling Clay I would rather be in Paris than coding, so I think I'd rather be there right now. Or sober. I'd rather be sober anywhere or drunk in Paris. I hate alcohol.
"y/n, focus," Clay demands.
I force myself to sit up. "What?"
"Stay on the phone with us," Clay says, more softly now. I notice they're in a car. "Help's on their way. Let them in when they get there."
I nod, a lot is going on, but I follow directions.
Clay and George talk to me while they drive. It takes ten minutes until someone knocks hurriedly on the door. I let them in like the boys say. A woman in a uniform comes over to me to talk. I hand her the phone, just wanting to fall asleep.
And then Clay arrives.
I run to him and give him a hug. He holds me tight for a moment. Tears sting my eyes, and there's stains on his shirt when I pull away to look at his face.
"I'm sorry," I whisper, "This is all my fault."
He shakes his head. "Did you force him to drink?"
Everything is fuzzy. "I don't think so."
"The bottles were pretty full when we looked at them, unless there's others somewhere else." It's the voice of the woman.
I glance behind me, noticing all the people surrounding Nick. I close my eyes and burrow my face into Clay's chest.
"y/n is a light weight," George comments, "Nick isn't though."
Clay forces me to look at him. "Was Nick drinking before he got here?"
I nod and start crying harder. Cay pulls me into a hug again. "It's not your fault," he whispers.
I sniffle. "You don't know that."
"Nick's a grown man who should be able to handle his alcohol," Clay says. I hear George scoff somewhere near us.
There's some shuffling by the people surrounding Nick. They talk to George, and I try my best to block it out.
After what feels like forever, Clay grabs me by the shoulders and talks softly. "George is going to stay with you. I'm going to the hospital."
I nod, trying my hardest to focus. I haven't focused all night, but I need to right now. I know I do. "Okay."
And then he's gone as fast as he was here.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
have a good day <3