If Only

By EmillyKathrynn

1.5M 34.5K 3.6K

When Charlotte is left devastated by her boyfriend's infidelity. She finds herself persuaded into a night out... More

WELCOME
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
Sixteen
Seventeen
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
Twenty One
Twenty Two
Twenty Three
Twenty Four
Twenty Five
Twenty Six
Twenty Seven
Twenty Eight
Twenty Nine
Thirty
Thirty One
Thirty Two
Thirty Three
Thirty Five
Thirty Six
Thirty Seven
Thirty Eight
Thirty Nine
Fourty
Fourty One
Fourty Two
Fourty Three
Fourty Four
Fourty Five
Fourty Six
Fourty Seven
Fourty Eight
Fourty Nine
Fifty
Fifty One
Fifty Two
Fifty Three
Fifty Four
Fifty Five
Fifty Six
Epilogue
Bonus Chapter
The Love Of Ace
Bonus 2

Thirty Four

16.4K 400 37
By EmillyKathrynn

Charlotte Crawford

I woke to the sound of my phone buzzing over and over again. I reached for it until I successfully grabbed it in my hand answering

"Hello" I murmured

"Sorry if I woke you, but I felt it's best to inform you that it is Nates birthday today" Will's voice rang through my ears as I sat up in bed looking to the empty space next to me

"What? He didn't tell me"

"Of course he didn't, just trying to help you out. He hates his birthday, he's probably sitting beside his mothers grave right now moping" he sighed in the other line

"December 28th a day he dreads"

"Oh wow" I paused for a moment not knowing quite what to say "He told me about Nina, so I understand why todays hard"

"He doesn't celebrate his birthday, but I figured you should know incase he's off today"

"Okay" then an idea came to mind, one he'd probably kill me for "Can you come for dinner, you and Lauren? For Nate can you do dinner tonight?" He groaned from my suggestion

"Damn it Charlotte... For Nate I'll do it, I've tried to erase the bad childhood memories of this day. Celine would do her best but, his father was the worst to him about today"  I looked out to the city as the rain fell

"Come for dinner-"

"We'll be there, I'll cook steak. The way I cook it is his favorite"

"Thank you William I owe you one" he chuckled "make sure Lauren wears that cute little black dress you love"

"Okay, bye" I ended the line and went off to the shower striping out of my pajamas

————————————————

Going downstairs after my shower to start up breakfast I decided to make French toast

"Mrs.Crawford you know I can make you breakfast it's my job" I looked to Donna

"I'm just used to doing it on my own, it's alright you can take the day off, Williams coming over to make dinner and I think I'll survive lunch" she smiled at me with a polite thank you

Soon Nate came home as I watched him exit the elevator from the kitchen "You are making breakfast?"

"Where were you?" I whisked the mixture as he walked over to me leaving a kiss on my cheek

"I was running some errands" I felt his shirt against me "you are soaked you need to change your clothes" I looked to his face "gosh your drenched, you go for a run in the rain?" He nodded his head

"You'll catch a cold, go change"

"Okay mom" he mocked walking away towards the stairs "only because I care and I've never seen you take a sick day" he rolled his eyes walking up the stairs

'Errands'

Why would he lie to me today? I know today may be hard but I could help him through it if he'd only let me. I placed a hand on my belly as I felt our little girl kick, we were 21 weeks along

After I finished making breakfast he came downstairs joining me "you never make breakfast" he raised a brow in confusion

"I felt like being a good upstanding citizen, it's a Saturday and I was in the mood for breakfast-" he took the spatula from my hand

"And I'll make it for you, your a hazard in the kitchen Tesoro" I gasped pretending to be hurt by his playful words

"I'm sorry it's the truth tesoro" he kissed my cheek "maybe our little girl fools you into thinking inedible food is good" I stepped away and he slapped my ass further annoying me but at the same time turning me on

"Hands to yourself Mr.Crawford" He chuckled as I sat down on one of the wooden stools at the island table "maybe I should get you the kiss the cook apron?"

"Maybe you shouldn't" it was a warning towards me but I saw it more so a challenge

"I'll think about it" he jest shaking his head in disagree as I smirked "come on it would be so cute, you can bring it to Cornwall.. make me a special breakfast"

"I don't think we have the same idea in mind for special breakfast Tesoro" I felt my cheeks heat at his words

"Oh well what's your idea?" I made my way back to him and before I could think he quickly lifted me onto the counter pulling me into him

"This" he kissed me passionately slipping a hand in my shirt holding my harden nippled. Then the buzzing of his phone slipped his hand away

He groaned letting go of me as I pouted, he set fire to every inch of my body within a matter of seconds. I slipped down from the counter and began to cut strawberries

"Grazie Jillian" he sighed and then placed his phone down turning back to me

"I did not burn the French toast!" I placed it on two plates dividing them equally but extra strawberries for me

We sat together enjoying breakfast with the view of New York but more so of him "I love you" I couldn't help but just say it out-loud while staring at him, my emotions had overcome me most recently

It was true, I loved him, I actually knew what it felt like to live fully and deeply. I wasn't fully alone anymore in ways, it wasn't manipulative or obsessive, there was no jealousy or hatred. It was just pure

"I love you to" he kissed my cheek placing a hand on my bump "thank you for this" he whispered "I appreciate your attempt at breakfast and to my surprise it tastes good"

"You stunned, your wife can actually master a food!" He rolled his eyes as I passed him the newspaper i held in hand. It made me feel more down to earth reading from a paper, more in the moment in the mornings

——————————————————

Will and Lauren walked through the elevator as I stood in the kitchen alone "he went to the office for an emergency a few hours back but he should be back any time now" Lauren went off to the dining room

"Oh my god this is perfect" she squealed from the other room

"I made his favorites and added some of my cravings" She came back taking me into her arms

"Well I'll get to work on the steaks" He placed them down on the counter as he began to prep them "you know he might angry, he doesn't do birthdays"

"Then he gets angry Will, I refuse to let him hate his birthday any longer. He's 28 today a grown man, he has to get it together put his pride aside and love his birthday!"

"You really do defy him you know that" Will said chuckling "no wonder he loves you" i smiled

"Have you done the nursery?" Lauren came back to the kitchen "unfortunately not, work has just killed us but we will get to it at some point" I went to the table setting it

Lauren placed cheesy happy birthday balloon, one weirdly having Ed Sheerans face on it "she had a huge Ed phase" Will interrupted my thoughts

"Didn't expect to have 3 dinner guests" Lauren laughed shrugging as she looked at me

"Divide really stuck with me?" The elevator doors opened and he looked over to the kitchen to see Will cooking the steaks in confusion

"Where's Charlotte?" He walked over to Will as his voice trailed through the house "and why are you cooking steak?"

"I'm here and it's your birthday" his face grew tense and I couldn't help but sigh

"I know you hate your birthdays but I'd feel guilty if I did nothing, it's just us for dinner" he was annoyed but I was doing a nice thing

"Your wife did something nice for you and you just sighed at her, get it together man" Will chirped slapping his back causing the side eye from Nate

"It's just not a day to celebrate" Lauren stepped out from the dining room

"Oh yes it is, come on I saw the fan edits of you on instagram today... some people are celebrating. Plus we got Ed Sheeran balloons!" He looked to me sucking in his lips

"This will just be a normal dinner evening no birthday" he assured

"Oh come on, Will is making the steak you like. I made your favorite sides" I looked to Lauren with a smile because she made a cake

"Your twenty eight today brother, your an old man" Will mocked at him patting his back

"Yeah that's your future in two months"

"don't tell me that" Will groaned dramatically as he placed the steak on the pan

"Hey I'm twenty nine nobody can complain!" Lauren spat "eleven months til thirty" she raised her hands "and still no ring on my finger" she mumbled to me causing me to laugh

"What's so funny" They both looked at us

"Oh you wouldn't get it" Lauren sighed "too much in those heads of your to understand, do you have any towels?"

"Upstairs first closet to your left" Lauren left up the stairs "at-least at twenty eight your married and your wife's pregnant, the American dream" Will joked

"The American dream is about achieving the highest aspirations and goals, like F. Scott Fitzgeralds Great Gatsby's character Jay is basically a symbol of it"

"Your wife's a nerd" Will whispered not so quietly

"Not a nerd, I just loved American Literature" I sighed moving the food to the dining room

"Nobody loves American Literature, I'm positive I failed it in HighSchool" Will countered placing a steak on each plate

"I'm not arguing with you about this right now" he rolled his eyes at me "damn sassy much?"

"Alright, alright enough" Lauren said taking a seat "birthday boy, take a seat!" That caused another sharp death glare towards our way from Nate


"I specifically remember the look on Dean Crosby's face as we walked out of his office going to pack our bags" Will stated sharing a memory of their time at boarding school

"I wouldn't have been kicked out if you didn't point out that I was your accomplice" Will shook his head

"No, no you helped me start the boat!"

"You crashed it!"

"What made you think taking Dean Crosby's sailboat out for a swing while he was on vacation was okay?" Lauren questioned previously attending the same school

"Oh we didn't, we were just rebels" Will shrugged

"You stole the deans sailboat and crashed it for fun?" I questioned incredulously

"We didn't intentionally crash it darling? Just kind of happened" Will sipped his wine

"Didn't just kind of happened you sailed towards a giant rock?" Nate added and Will sighed

"I feel attacked, shall we move on. We've all finished our meals" what a drama queen

I looked over to Lauren who nodded getting up from the dining table "just give me a minute"

Soon the lights cut out "what happened? Lauren?" Nate called out "why aren't you both freaking out"

Soon a number 28 candle displayed on a perfectly round birthday cake appeared as we all began to sing in our horrible voices

She placed the cake in-front of him, he looked slightly annoyed but also grateful

"Make a wish" I whispered and he blew out the candles as Lauren flicked the lights back on

"I can't believe you conned me into doing this shit" I kissed his cheek ruffling his hair

"I love birthdays, I can't help it" i smiled stupidly at him as he looked a bit sad

"She'd be proud of you man, you just gotta let go of the grief and forgive yourself" Will stood patting his back "happy birthday, you owe me two hundred bucks"

"I think you'll live" Nate rolled his eyes

"Thank you Charlotte" Lauren smiled helping clean up and the two of them exited to the elevator

"Happy birthday babe" he turned to me looking uneasy "thank you" he whispered as if he didn't even want to say it

"I want this day to be a good one, not a bad one" a smirk appeared in his face and I could immediately see what he was thinking

His phone rang "I'm gonna head upstairs, I'll see you there" he chuckled pulling me in for a passionate kiss and answering the call as I went up the stairs case

I made it to the top of the stairs into the hall when I heard the elevator open. I turned back confused thinking maybe Lauren left something

But then I heard it, his voice

"Well well, Nate Crawford we meet again" my heart stopped as I heard him, what the fuck was he doing here

"You know I never pictured her with a guy like you. Because she always loved me. During my time of  anger over losing her I made a buddy, he sent me for you... you know you may know him"

"Carter what the fuck are you doing in my house, get out before I-"

"Before you what?" There was ultimate silence and I quietly looked down the staircase to see him and my heart stopped

I felt immediately nauseous as I saw a gun pointed at Nate "how did you get up here"

"Your security is won over pretty easily by a couple thousand" he shrugged "so where is she?"

"She's not home, she's at her parents" i didn't know how he was so calm as I was visibly shaking

"Your lying, is she upstairs" his tone got more aggressive flinging the gun around making me more and more terrified as the seconds past

"Who sent you here?"

"Who do you think" he chuckled "I work for Mr.Priamos... you might know him" his grin was disgusting as he said it "Atlas Priamos, he wanted me to do a simple job for him-"

"If it was so simple, he would've done it by now. You kill me my family's just gonna kill you, my wife will kill you" he began chuckling outlandishly

"Your wife? She married you because she had to, Charlotte loves me!" He sounded insane, talking like a madman pointing the gun at him

I pulled my phone from my pocket in goals not to drop it scooting down the hall quietly dialing 911 "there's an intruder in my house with a gun" my voice was shaky "he's p-pointing at my husband Nathaniel Crawford-"

"WHERE THE FUCK IS SHE NATE" he yelled making me tremble more and texted I Will

"Please help me" I whispered to the operator as she claimed to have sent help, but my mind was a blur as I crawled back over to see him

"I told you Charlotte is not home, she does not love you... you cheated-"

"I regret what I did, don't you see that! But she'll come back with me I know her, she loves me!"

"She hates you" his eyes went mad "you treated the most incredible woman in the world as if she meant nothing to you, you cheated on her"

"It was a mistake-"

"One that you made, you can't take back. Yeah you should feel sorry for yourself, you lost her... she moved on Carter!" He was still calm yet getting more frustrated "just put the gun down before you do something you regret again"

"Why, so then I kill you... Charlotte comes back to me and I raise your child-"

"Your fucking sick, you'll never go near her or our child, never you hear me" He just began cynically laughing at his words

Where the fuck was help, nobody was coming

"You'll never ever lay a hand on my wife or child. She fucking hates you" Nate lunged at him

Then there it was.

The moment the world stopped

The sound of the gunshot rang through my ears as Nate fell to the ground as the bullet pierced through him

It felt as if my own heart had stopped

I screamed, I couldn't help but scream

The second shot went off as his body hit the ground his hand going straight to his chest grasping the bloody wound

The father of my child and love of my life, was fucking shot and I could barely move as if I were paralyzed

——————————————————
A/N:

Uh... happy birthday Nate?

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