Five Years
"Love, what are you doing there?" Hyunjin laughed so loudly, his melodic soft voice reverberating through the walls of their shared bedroom.
Felix pouted, not bothering to answer his lover as a sign of silent protest.
"Dear lord, baby. You're so cute." Said Hyunjin walking over to the open suitcase where Felix was folded perfectly in a circle, hugging his legs so he could fit inside. It reminded Hyunjin of a cute kitten in a box and he can't help but coo at his baby's adorableness.
He was careful not to step on his clothes that was the original content of the suitcase before Felix decided to thrown them harshly all over the floor to take over their place.
He crouched down to be on eye level with his sulky one, and tried to pull him up but due to him refusing to leave the poor suitcase, Felix ended up just sitting there instead.
"Baby, it's just a few days. I won't be long." Hyunjin pulled Felix to land a kiss on his forehead. "I'll come home as soon as I can." He promised in which Felix only shook his head.
"No! I don't want to!" His brows knitting.
"But love—"
"You-you just came home! You were gone for weeks when y-you said it would only be three days! And you're gone for a month before that." He choked out a sob that has been bubbling in his throat and soon enough, he's already crying. "You j-just came home, love!"
He knows it was childish, and isn't healthy for a twenty-seven-year old that was supposed to be an adult to act like that, really. He's aware. But what can he do if he misses his Hyunjin?
The lad had this business trip to Australia that was expected to only last for three days but they suddenly got an anomaly and Hyunjin needed to stay longer. Days turned into a week,and a week turned into two weeks. And he was just gone for a month before that on another business trip as well.
And though he was sad about it, he accepted it like the understanding lover he is. He waited patiently until the older finally came home hoping they could spend some time after that, and they did... for two fucking days and now the older needs to go again for yet another business trip to Japan and he can't have it. Not this time. Not anymore.
He's running low on patience and understanding and he just can't go on another week, even days with only a mere call or a facetime being the only way he can reach Hyunjin. He needs to touch him. He just needs him by his side at all times.
He's clingy to a fault, he's well aware. But he really can't help it when every fiber in his body was aching for Hyunjin's touch, his laugh, his kisses, his presence... him.
He's clingy to a fault. He's well aware.
"I know, angel. I'm so sorry." Hyunjin tries to wipe his tears vainly since it's just being replaced with new ones just as soon. "But I really can't miss this one, baby or it might jeopardize some things in the company."
Felix understands, really, he does. But still he shook his head stubbornly with no plans of backing down anytime soon.
"If I could I would bring you with—"
"Yeah, take me with you. I wanna go with you." Pleads Felix, cutting off his lover mid sentence.
"You know I would if I could... but we both know that's not possible, love." Hyunjin brushed his hair on the side. "Uncle won't allow it, he needs you here to tend to your own business matters. You're in training for inheritance, babe. You can't afford to be careless now."
"But I really can't, Hyunjin. It's so lonely without you here. I wanna hug you when I get home from a long day. I wanna kiss you. Cook for you." He sniffled. "I just need you here, baby please. Don't leave me here anymore. I don't want to get used to your side of the bed being empty. It's cold. I wanna feel your warmth in my sleep. I wanna rest in your arms. Please, I've only had two days with you."
"Don't you... Don't you love me anymore?"
Felix's face dropped in the mind-numbing realization he had in a whim. His cries became quieter but more painful. His heart constricts everytime he hiccups and he feels like he's spiralling down.
This is the problem when he starts overthinking. He cannot stop them and he always ends up crying from hurting himself in baseless thoughts swirling around his brain, eating him up alive.
Hyunjin didn't say anything, instead, he took Felix in his arms carrying him all the way down to the kitchen where he situated his anxious ass atop their marble counter, leaving him briefly to get him a glass of water and helping him drink it.
The spur of the moment question, left floating in the air between them.
"Are you okay now?" Hyunjin asked softly.
Felix nods, looking away from Hyunjin, ashamed.
"Listen to me, baby." Hyunjin held his chin and tilted his head so they could meet eye to eye. "I've loved you for so long. I've lived in pain watching you smile for someone else, hold hands with someone that wasn't me, and kiss other guys in front of me. I've seen my most precious one like someone else all throughout my teenage years until in my early twenties. And now I finally have you. You're finally mine now. Do you think I'm stupid enough to just let you go?"
Hyunjin tucked his hair behind his ears, carefully brushing the strands away from his eyes. "I've waited for you for so long, love. I've longed for you God knows how long. You should know that unloving you is not an option for me. Never was. It's either you or none at all."
Felix felt himself melt once again. He knows. It's just that his thoughts becomes uncontrollable when Hyunjin was away. Felix have this stupid ideology in his head that Hyunjin was too good for him. He's too perfect, and Felix... He's just a brat who happens to be born at the right place and have the privilege to grow alongside Hyunjin. That's all he is. A privileged person.
He really doesn't know. All his life he had been so confident with himself but when it comes to Hyunjin, he becomes a mess. He's just so bright and intelligent and Felix wants to be his perfect fit. He wants to stand proud with him but he still feels like he's not doing enough and it's eating him up.
"Babe, you never forget our anniversaries, monthsaries, birthdays or whatever it is that you deemed a special day for us, it's odd for for you to forget, love. But how come you always forget that I love you so much?" Hyunjin rested his forehead with Felix's, their noses touching and gazes never faltering. "I love you so much, Angel. It's always been you. I'm yours just like you are mine since we were kids."
There was a stretch of silence after that. Felix didn't really know what to say, but he has already relaxed. All anxiousness, doubts or any other negative thoughts out the window. He's breathing right again
"I'm sorry, Hyunnie." He landed a peck on Hyunjin's tall nose. "I just love you too much that it was hard to breath whenever you're away. I don't mean to be so childish and possessive. I know it's toxic, but please don't leave me. I promise to do better, love. I just need a little more time."
"You were never toxic, my love. And even if you are, I'm willing to drink all your poisons."
They stayed just like that in silence for a while. Felix on top of the counter with Hyunjin in between his legs. His hands around Hyunjin's neck, and Hyunjin's on top of his exposed thighs, making circle patterns with his thumb on his skin.
Felix's heart swelling with undeniable and overwhelming feeling of love and security.
"Thank you so much for choosing me." He whispered.
"Thank you for finally looking my way."
"You're my heart."
"You're my all."
°°°
"Hello, Russell, could you cancel my flight? Yeah, and please tell Nicole to cancel my meeting in New York as well and inform our partners we'll do it in Korea, instead. Let them know it's so we could give them a tour in our head quarters.
They need us more than we need them, this shouldn't be an issue. But still inform the analytics team to have a research for the second best option and try to make as an ideal of a proposal as it can be, just in case."
Hyunjin sighed, looking at his beautiful lover that was sleeping peacefully beside him on the bed.
"I just can't leave the country for the time being. And please clear out my schedule for two weeks."
;