ZEKIAH XYRIEL'S POV
"He's here. Zeriel, your boyfriend is here to pick you up. Sanaol. Ako kase mamaya pa 'yong date namin."
Alina pouted while playing with her fingers. I raised my eyebrow and stood up from the sofa to take a look at the glass window. Napakagat ako sa labi ko nang makita siyang may dala na dalawang paper bags. He's still wearing a black shorts and a hawaiian polo with three buttons opened. Naka-shades pa siya at naka Balenciaga shoes.
He look so adorable on his attire.
"Mine? Are you here? Can you open the door for me?" I heard him knocking outside.
Tumayo naman kaagad si Ali, naka-cross arms pa."Taray! Bahay ko 'to tapos ikaw ang hinanap. Pagbuksan mo na nga! Iisipin ko na lang na humingi rin siya ng permiso sa'kin na pumasok."
Why is she mad?
"How come you're here? Akala ko ba mamayang tanghali pa ang dating niyo?" I asked him.
We greet each other through DM last night. Hindi pa nga siya nakuntento kaya tinawagan niya ako. It last long for about an hour. Kaya nga almost 1:00 AM na akong nakatulog.
He respond through a hug. Hinalikan niya rin ang noo ko kagaya ng ginagawa niya kapag nagkikita kami.
"Minadali ko sila kase namiss na kita. Can I sleep on your condo later?" he pleaded.
"Hala! Narinig mo 'yon, Ate Alina? They were sleeping together!" pagsusumbong pa ni Scarlet kaya nabaling sa kanya ang atensyon namin.
Ali glared at the both of us."Anong kapangahasan ang ginagawa niyo, ha? It's against the law!"
"What law?" Shael asked her.
I rolled my eyes heavenwards."It's just a sort kind of her so-called-rules. Wala naman tayong ginagawang masama."
He just chuckled at my answer and didn't bother them who were lecturing us. Lumapit naman siya sa kanila dala ang dalawang paper bags. Did he bought them some gifts?
"Hey, Scarlet. I heard you love chocolates so I bought you some." He handed the other paper bag to my sister.
Her eyes twinkled and immediately accepted his gift."Yay! Thanks, Kuya. Thumbs up na talaga ako sa'yo."
"Uy, char. Sugar daddy, is that you?" Ali teased.
Napailing na lang siya at binigay ang huling paper bag sa kanya. I thought it was for me! Where's mine now?! Argh.
"Rynier asked me to give this to you. Suotin mo raw mamayang gabi sa date niyo," he laughed a little.
Her eyes widened and didn't say anything and hurriedly went upstairs. I bet she doesn't want us to see what's inside. But it's still unfair! I'm the girlfriend here! Dapat ako 'yong una niyang binigyan.
"What's with that face, mine? Aren't you happy that I'm here?" He kept on glancing at me while driving Scarlet to the house.
He couldn't get it! Of course, I'm mad. Sino ba namang hindi kapag 'yong boyfriend mo hindi ka binigyan ng pasalubong tapos 'yong kapatid at pinsan mo meron. Mababaw ba ang dahilan ko? Well, I don't care. Naiinis pa rin ako.
He used his other hand to reach mine so that he could intertwined our fingers. Hindi pa rin ako nagsalita. As much as possible, I will avoid having arguments with him. Hindi pa nga kami umabot ng one week tapos mag-aaway na kami. I don't want that.
"Mine, tell me what's wrong. Don't give me a damn silent treatment. In getting worried here," he said softly.
Tiningnan ko si Scarlet sa side mirror at nakitang busy siya kakakain ng chocolates sa likuran. She didn't bother to eavesdrop our conversation. Wala rin naman siguro siyang pakialam.
"Where's my gift? Bakit sila meron tapos ako wala?"
The side of his lips rose up to form a smile. Mas lalo lang akong nainis at tinanggal ang pagkakahawak ng kamay niya sa'kin. He bit his lower lip to contain his laugh. What's funny! He's not taking me seriously!
"Okay, hindi na ako tatawa." He looked sideways to hide his face."Actually, I bought a gift for you. Sa'yo pa ba ang makakalimutan ko?"
"Then where is it? Why not give it to me earlier?" I hissed.
He held my hand again and played with it."Because I want to give it in private. Just the two of us."
Parang bigla akong kinabahan ro'n pero hindi ko lang pinahalata. What kind of gift is it, tho? Bakit kailangang kami lang dalawa? Is it that special?
"Nandito na tayo. Baba na kayo. I'll just get something at the back. Mauna na kayo sa loob."
We did as what he had said. Nahirapan pa nga akong hatakin si Scarlet dahil hanggang ngayon ay kumakain pa rin siya. I just told her to finish the last piece she was eating before we'll go inside. Palagi na lang siyang kumakain ng sweets kaya minsan pinapagalitan siya ng daddy niya. He doesn't want her to grew up like a spoiled brat... which is right.
"What are those?" Turo ko sa apat na paper bags na dala niya.
He looked at it before walking towards me."It's gifts. Binili ko rin para sa kanila. Pinaghandaan ko 'to."
Mas lalo tuloy akong kinabahan nang makapasok na kami sa loob. He was just at my back, following us to the living room. I don't feel any nervous whenever I'm going to visit this house...just this time. I don't know what's running on his mind. I haven't prepared myself for a confession!
"Good morning, Tita, Daddy!" Scarlet kissed their cheeks after greeting them.
They did the same way and turned their gaze to me. Hindi rin nakatakas ang seryosong tingin ng ama ko kay Shael na nasa likuran ko.
"Uh...Ate Zeriel wants to pay a visit that's why she's here," Scarlet tried to get their attention.
Dad nodded, still serious."Yeah, I see...With a guy, huh? He's the guy last time, right? What is his name?"
"Shael, po. Good morning pala," he answered casually.
Mom approached him and pulled his arms gently to the sofa."Suit yourself, hijo. I'll just get drinks."
"Dad! Don't look at him like that! Visitor siya ni Ate so don't be like that," saway sa kanya ng kapatid ko.
Dad looked at her with questioning eyes."Why are you still here? Go upstairs and change your clothes. It's your turn to do the household chores today."
When she was finally gone in our sight, Dad turned his gaze on me and so with Shael on the other side. I don't know what's on his mind. I couldn't even read his reaction.
"What's with the sudden visit, Zeriel? Your reaction changes after stepping in this house today." He sat properly and fixed his polo.
I take a glance at Shael before answering."I just want to formally introduce him to...my parents. Is there something wrong?"
"He's already your boyfriend, isn't he?" Mom suddenly arrived with a tray of snack.
Mom isn't mad nor excited. Usually, I could always read their reactions in just a glance. But now, it's different. Or maybe it's just because of the nervousness I'm feeling.
Napatikhim naman ng konti si Shael."Yes, po. Sorry kung hindi ako nakapag-paalam sa inyo na liligawan ko po ang anak niyo. We just have...some things to fix."
"And do you think it's not rude to introduce yourself as our daughter's boyfriend? Kung talagang lalaki ka, e 'di sana hinarap mo kami no'ng nililigawan mo pa lang siya," Dad sounded mad.
I wanted to protest but Shael immediately pressed my palm, telling me to calm down. He just smiled at him, not even giving a single hint that he's nervous or not.
Mom sighed."It's not a problem for me. As long as Zeriel is happy, I won't protest.
"Why is it so easy for you to trust this guy, Wyna? Are you really sure that she wouldn't hurt Zeriel?!" Dad asked her intensively.
"Walang taong hindi nasasaktan, Ignacio. People can get hurt in so many ways. At saka desisyon 'to ng anak natin. Hindi na bata si Zeriel para pigilan natin sa mga gusto niyang gawin sa buhay. All we have to do is to support her as parents," mahinahong sagot ni mom.
"I know what I did wasn't right and I understand if you're mad. But I do really love her. And I will accept the consequences whatever it is. Basta payagan niyo lang po ako na makasama ang anak niyo." Shael held my hand so tight as if he doesn't want me to move away from him.
Gusto kong matawa sa reaksyon niya at inisin siya dahil sa nanlalamig niyang kamay. Pero naalala kong pinaghandaan niya 'to, ginawa niya pa rin kahit alam niya kung gaano ka-strikto si Dad. And I admire him for being tough and brave enough to face my parents despite of the consequences.
Dad face palmed, doesn't know what to do."She's still studying and it might affect her studies if she enter in a relationship. Marami na akong nakikitang mga estudyante na bumababa ang grades dahil sa bagay na 'yan. Zeriel has to focus most of her time in reviewing her lessons and not on boyfriend's."
"I know how to manage my time, dad. Hindi naman ako kagaya ng mga taong sinasabi mo. You know how much I valued time for some important matters.. Or its just that you know nothing at all," giit ko pa.
Para kaseng pinagpipilitan niya na hindi dapat maging kami eh. Na sagabal lang daw 'to sa pag-aaral ko. I am his daughter! He should've known it more that anyone else's!
"Ignacio..Just let them do what they want. I trust Zeriel and---"
"Of course, I do trust her. We trust our daughter. And hindi ko lang kayang pagkatiwalaan ay ang lalaking 'yan. Hindi naman natin 'yan kilala eh. Paano kung niloloko lang pala niya ang anak natin?!" Dad stood up and messed his hair, looking so frustrated.
"Do you think Zeriel is that dumb? Kilala ko ang anak natin nang higit pa sa pagkakakilala mo sa kanya. If she chose a person to be with her, its rest assured that we could also trust that person. Hindi siya madaling magtiwala dahil sa ginawang mali mo noon at nadala na siya. That's why I didn't protest because I know she's choosing the right one. No objection for the guy she loves." Mom looked so serious right now, which is barely happens.
She wants to be mad at her dad for not trusting her decision. Sino ba naman siya para husgahan ang lalaking mahal niya, 'di ba? Oh yeah, he's Dad. Pero kahit na gano'n, parang pinaparamdam niya pa rin na hindi siya naniniwala at ayaw niya sa gusto ng anak niya.
For the first time, he looked at Shael with no more madness or hatred."If I trust you, will you do everything I said? I'm not doing this to dictate you but to make sure that my daughter is in the right hands. I'm a man and so as you. I know that you're aware when it comes to asking for the girl's hand on her father. It doesn't matter if its hard as long as you get her. Am I right?"
"Yes, sir," Shael answered politely.
Hindi ko alam kung bakit bigla akong kinabahan sa sinabi niya. And Shael obeyed without even thinking of it. He's indeed serious. Kahit naman alam kong gagawin niya anuman ang sabihin ni Dad, baka kase pahirapan siya o ano. And yes, I'm worried.
Sa sobrang pag-aalala ko parang lalabas ang lahat ng organs ko sa katawan.
"First, you should always ask for our permission if you want to bring our daughter anywhere. Dapat sabihin mo sa'min lahat sa pupuntahan niyo, kung anong gagawin niyo, at kung hanggang kailan. Time limit is only a day." Dad sat back on the sofa and comfortably leaned his back on it.
Tumango naman kaagad si Shael."Yes, po. Gagawin ko."
"Isn't it too much? They should have their privacy. Baka naman pasundan mo sila," sabi pa ni mom.
Gosh! Is he really that over-protective? Siguro kung si Scarlet ang nasa posisyon ko, baka dito sila sa bahay mag-date ng future boyfriend niya.
"It will be for the meantime. Kapag napatunayan niyang totoo siya at mahal niya ang anak natin kagaya ng sinasabi niya, tatanggalin ko naman ang rule na 'to," he said in a monotone voice.
"Payag po ako sa kahit na ano. Basta ba sinabi niyo," prenteng sagot naman ni Shael.
Seriously? Hindi ako kumbinsido talaga na magagawa niyang magtiis sa ganoong sitwasyon.
Dad sighed heavily."The second one is the curfew. Papayagan kitang makipag-date o lumabas kasama si Zeriel pero hindi dapat lumagpas ng alas dyes ng gabi. Do you understand? If you failed to do this, then you're not accepted as Zeriel's boyfriend."
"Dad, I usually go home at 12:00 o'clock in the midnight and even passes over 2:00 AM. That is too early," reklamo ko.
Hindi naman ako bata 'di ba? I can handle myself! And to be honest, malapit na akong mainis sa mga rules niyang gawa-gawa. Mom might have noticed it so she gave me a secret gesture to keep silent and so I did.
Shael still managed to smile at my dad."No worries, sir. I can surely do that."
"And third, you two should get high grades just as usual. My instict says that you're an intelligent one. Gusto kong patunayan niyong dalawa na kaya niyong balansehin ang mga bagay-bagay sa tama. Maliwanag ba?" Dady finally said the final blow.
That's the only thing that I could agree. Syempre, palaging mataas ang grades ko at hindi nawawala ang pangalan ko sa deans lister kaya naman walang problema sa'kin 'yon.
"Sure thing, sir. Don't worry, I won't let you down," he answered confidently.
"Can you get out for a moment? I'll just talk to my daughter." Dad cleared his throat.
I glared at him."At least say it in a most sincere way. Para namang pinapauwi niyo na siya."
"Hey, its okay. Sa garden niyo lang ako, hintayin kita sa labas." Shael gave me a small smile and kissed my forehead.
Tumango naman sa'kin si mommy at saka sinabayan siya sa labas. Kaya ngayon, kami na lang ni dad ang nandito sa salas. I don't know what we're going to talk abaout but it must be important. Baka naman dahil sa amin ni Shael.
Bumuntong hininga muna siya bago nagsalita."Hindi ako sigurado kung okay na ba tayo o hindi pero hindi mo alam kung gaano ako kasaya ngayon na kinausap mo ako ng masinsinan. You even introduced him to me. I may be that strict earlier but I'm happy for you. Sana lang ay hindi niya gawin ang pagkakamaling ginawa ko noon."
"Now that we're already here, maybe we can talk about it. A-Ano ba talagang...nangyari noon, dad? Why did you suddenly change? We were okay way back then and you just told me that you impregnated mom's best friend. Alam mo ba na hindi 'yon kapani-paniwala sa'kin?"
Here it is,I'm letting out what I've been keeping for a year and months. Wala nang atrasan 'to. Ayoko na rin na tumatakas sa mga bagay na dapat kong kaharapin. Napapagod na ako sa pagbibingi-bingian at sa pagtatago. Sa pag-iiwas sa mga bagay na hindi ko naman dapat tinatakbuhan.
Pinagsiklop niya ang mga kamay niya at nag-isip kung saan magsisimula."You were just an innocent girl before so I understand if you don't know what's going on that time. Everything went unexpectedly. Bigla na lang akong nakatanggap ng message galing kay Sheria, sa best friend ng mommy mo na magkita raw kami at may sasabihin siya sa'kin. I didn't thought that it was all about Scarlet. She told me everything, which I did not believed in the first place. First was we don't get along that much. Second was we're not seeing each other so often. And third is that I don't do cheating."
"Yeah. That was the line you used to tell me before. You don't do lying nor cheating." Tumango tango pa ako na para bang sumasang-ayon sa sinasabi niya.
"I felt so sorry for breaking that word, Zeriel. Pero anak ginawa ko ang lahat para mapatunayan na hindi sa'kin si Scarlet. 'Yon ang naging dahilan kung bakit hindi ako masyadong umuuwi sa bahay at nagpupuyat sa paghahanap ng katotohanan. Kung nakakauwi man, masyado nang gabi. Your mom was too confused just like you and it hurts me million times. I just let your mom cried in our wedding day but knowing that she's crying for the stupidity that I've made, I'm going insane." Sa boses pa lang niya ramdam ko 'yong sakit.
At para sa'kin, bumabalik na naman 'yong dati. 'Yong pagpupuyat ko makita lang siya sa gabi, sa bawat pag-iyak ko 'wag lang niya kaming iwan ni mom sa ere. Sa bawat sakit at lahat-lahat. Unti-unti na namang bumabalik sa'kin ang mga 'yon.
I smiled bitterly."Pareho lang naman yata tayong nababaliw nong mga panahon na 'yon. Kung nababaliw ka sa paghahanap ng katotohanan, kami ni mom sa pag-iisip kung nasaan kana o kung kumakain ka pa ba. K-Kung bakit..nagawa mo kaming ipagtabuyan ng ganoon."
"A-Anak..hindi ko kayo ipinagtabuyan. No'ng malaman kong ako pala talaga ang ama ni Scarlet, parang huminto ang mundo ko. Hindi ko alam kung sino sa inyo ang pipiliin ko hindi dahil hindi ko kayo totoong mahal ng mom mo, kundi dahil naaawa rin ako sa kapatid mo. Sheria was suffering into a disease because of the tumor inside her brain. Kaya siya napilitang sabihin sa'kin ang totoo para naman may maiwan siya sa kapatid mo. Just like you when I left you, Scarlet was more innocent. Kaya masakit din para sa akin na iwan lang siya basta-basta sa ere." A tear escaped from his eyes but he wiped it right away.
Ayaw niya sigurong ipakita sa akin na mahina pa rin siya. Actually, dad is a strong person. He seldom cries and falls down. Ngayon lang siya umiyak sa harapan ko ng ganito.
I swallowed hard and looked up, stopping myself from crying."W-What did exactly happened and you two had..Scarlet? Did she do anything bad to you or what? Tell me everything now since I can still bare with it. B-Baka mamaya..kapag hindi ko kinaya, ayoko na namang makinig."
"Someone put a drug on our drinks when we're celebrating my birthday. You're just three years old that time and your mom was busy at home taking care of you so she couldn't attend the after party. It was held in private, with my close friends. Hindi ko alam na isa sa kanila ang nag-imbita kay Sheria pero hinayaan ko lang. I know that she has feelings for me when she admitted it on your mom and I's wedding day. Pero nagkamabutihan naman kami dahil naiintindihan niya 'yon," he let out a heavy sigh.
Kahit na mahal ko ang kapatid ko, hindi ko pa rin mapigilang mainis ng konti sa mommy niya. She shouldn't have come to dad's after party when she knew that mom wasn't there. The story wasn't detailed but I know she knew.
"Continue, dad. I'm listening." I breathed in and out to calm down my self.
He cleared his throat before continuing."To make it fast, Elvis, put something on Sheria and I's drinks. Our friend's didn't notice it so his plan succeeded. The reason why I didn't come home that night of my birthday, when something happened to us. Sheria knows about it but didn't bother to tell me and hid the truth for 15 years. She still think of our family and did not think of his own and our daughter. Kaya hindi ko rin siya masisisi sa nangyari."
"Elvis, huh? That dumbass?! Isn't he Sophie the bitch's father?! I swear, I'm gonna kill him!" I gritted my teeth in anger.
I know its too late to know the truth because it all happened in the past. Pero may magagawa pa rin ako at 'yon at bugbugin siya nang walang tigil.
Damn him! He didn't just ruined our family but made Scarlet and her mom suffer too. Ang kapal naman ng esophagus niya para gawin 'yon! Kaya pala sa kanya nagmana ang anak niyang pakialamera at echosera. Mag-ama nga sila!
"I left you and your mom not because I want to, remember that. But because I know that Scarlet needs me too. Mahal ko kayo ng mom mo pero kailangan ko pa ring bigyan ng halaga at pagmamahal ang kapatid mo. Alam ko rin na kapag iniwan kita, masasaktan ka at magagalit ka sa'kin. But at the same time, I know that you'll grow up and stand on your own, which really happened and I'm so happy for you," he gave me a small smile but it wasn't forced nor fake.
Kung ganoon, masaya pala siya sa mga naging achievements ko. Buong akala ko pa naman ginawa niya 'yon kase mas pinili niya sila kaysa sa'min. But he did not. He chose to be a good father for the both of us despite of the struggles he has to face. And I'm a proud daughter of him too.
Hindi ko mapigilang matawa dahil sa narinig ko pero may halo 'yong iyak."Now I know why Scarlet grew up just like me. If we're just in the same age, she'll be my twin. Masayahin siya at mapagkumbaba. Kaya ayokong magbago ang ganoong ugali niya. Hindi kagaya ko na malabo pang bumalik sa dating ako. You know what dad? I've been through a lot of hardships. Kaya siguro hindi na ako kasing lambot gaya nang dati. Kung gano'n pa rin, siguro kalahati na lang. Buong pagkatao ko kase nalamon ng galit at hinanakit kaya natabunan na ata ang dating ako."
"Does that mean you already forgave me? That you're not mad at me anymore?" He was trying to hold up his tears but failed.
Is slowly nodded."Lolo taught me to listen on someone's point of view and forgive to those who made mistakes. You're still my dad and yeah it won't change. No one replaced you in my heart, dad. The spot is still yours."
"Masaya ako't napatawad mo na ako. Pero ngayong nabanggit mo ang daddy ko, parang biglang bumigat ang pakiramdam ko. I did things that were unforgivable. Hinding hindi matutumbasan ang sakit na dinanas ng mga magulang ko sa mga naranasan ko." Tinakpan niya ang buong mukha niya dahil sa kahihiyan.
Lumipat naman ako sa tabi niya at hinagod ang likuran niya."D-Dad..Just like what Lolo said, he forgave you even before you ask for his forgiveness. He's that kind. Mahal na mahal ka ni Lolo, dad."
"I know that he will forgive me and my siblings that easily. But I would never forgive myself for doing those to them," he cried so hard.
Eto na naman tayo sa iyakan eh. Ayoko pa namang magsimulang umiyak dahil bukod sa sasakit ang dibdib ko ay baka matagal-tagal pa bago ako tumigil. Lolo's death was still fresh on my mind up until now. Tapos ibabalik na naman 'yong sakit.
Gosh! I dont want to rewind any kinds of pain in my past again!
"What matters now is I forgave you and mom too. I even wondered how she resisted those things you've did to her. Is your love for each other that strong to the point that she's willing to wait for you?" I couldn't help but to ask him that.
"Yes, anak. Love is endless that's why. My love for your father didn't fade no matter how far we separated from each other. Kahit na wala kaming koneksyon, siya at siya pa rin ang laman ng puso't isipan ko." Mom suddenly arrived that made us turned our attention to her.
"How's that? Ang alam mo nag-cheat si dad sa'yo noon. Iniwan niya tayo dahil sa best friend mo. Kahit naman may rason siya, hindi pa rin maiiwasan na magalit tayo sa kanya. That is why I got so mad when you forgave him easily when you see each other again," I said, confused.
Mom just smiled at me and caressed my hair."Its because we both love each other. And trust is the only thing I'm holding on. Naniniwala akong malalim ang dahilan ng dad mo kaya niya nagawa 'yon sa'tin. And look, I was right."
Yeah, she is. I should've trusted her words before. Ngayon na mas naliwanagan na ako sa lahat, alam ko na kung anong gagawin ko.
---------------------------------------