BLAIR
“Do you have everything you’re going to need?”
“Yes, Mom.”
“What about your lunch?”
“Mom,” Hayes pleads, “I’m not a toddler. I’m fully capable of getting myself ready for the day.”
I sigh and cradle his face in my hands. He may be taller than I am, but Hayes is always going to be my baby boy. “I know you’re grown, but this feels like your first day of school all over again. Can you just humor your dear old mom?”
“You’re not old, Mom,” he says with a grin.
“I appreciate that, but you just graduated from high school and you’re starting what could be a career and you’re just a few months from being considered a grown-up, so I’m having a bit of a hard time right now.”
“The good news is I’ll be back tonight for dinner and I’ll tell you all about my day. I need to get going through.”
“I know,” I kiss his cheek. “I love you, Hayes.”
“Love you too, Ma.”
I had just turned eighteen when Hayes was born. His dad, Cody, and I thought that we could conquer the world. Neither of us planned on me getting pregnant our senior year of high school, but when it happened we adjusted our life plans. I was on track to play Division 1 softball when I found out I was pregnant. Obviously, I couldn’t play my final year of high school and I had to kiss the chance at a scholarship goodbye. It took a long time to come to terms with my original plans being foiled, but Cody and I were in it together.
The problem was that we were young and in the honeymoon phase when we came up with our future plans. Neither of us was prepared for the real world. Cody never did land that huge major league contract. I didn’t need the fame and the fortune of being an MLB wife, but it was something he could just never give up. At the end of the day, the addiction to The Show is what ended up tearing us apart.
As much as I want to blame him for the demise of our marriage, I think we were destined to end up that way the night we drank a bit too much wine and forgot the condom. Would we have made it if Hayes had never come into our lives? I don’t know, but I think we would have had a better chance at it. I wouldn’t trade it for the world, though. Even through the stress, the anxiety, and the heartbreak, Hayes was my saving grace. Now he was getting ready to start his own adult life and I was struggling to figure out who I was.
Strawberry is a small town known for the large strawberry fields and our once-a-year Strawberry Festival. I’m pretty sure the median age of residents is in the 50s. Not a lot of people my age are still here. Most kids graduate high school and high tail it out of here, only returning to visit their families and an occasional high school reunion. When I moved back to town it was hit gossip for quite some time.
It didn’t take long for the gossip to spread and it only got worse once the divorce was finalized. To protect me I just focused on what I could control and that was mostly raising Hayes and working for my dad’s home improvement store. After years of having no stability, moving from studio apartment to studio apartment with Cody and Hayes, being back in Strawberry gave me the support that I needed.
My parents welcomed us back with open arms and so did Cody’s parents. They seemed to understand their son’s need to chase the big contract more than I did, but never blamed either of us for what happened. Hayes grew up with both sides of grandparents equally active in his life. As much as I wish it was Cody and me doing it together, I feel like raising Hayes with all his grandparents nearby and involved was the next best thing.
A year and a half ago, I took on a new job as manager of the Strawberry Inn right in the middle of the town. It was bought by a woman who would quickly become my best friend. I was happier working there than at the home improvement store. Around the same time, my cousin, Harrison, moved here and took over the Captain’s position with Strawberry Fire Department. The two of them fell madly in love and I ended up with a true best friend and Hayes had a male role model that was part of his daily life. It was a huge win for both of us.
Harrison was the reason why Hayes was off so early in the morning and I was left worried about what his day was going to look like. Over the last couple of months, Hayes took an interest in the fire department and possibly becoming a firefighter. Harrison recommended a two-week camp that was taking place to those that were interested in applying for the fire academy. Not only will this camp give him a glimpse into the world, but it’ll look great on future job applications.
After sending Hayes on his way, I took a shower and got ready for work. Being the manager at the inn had its occasional rough days, but Angela hired a great staff and the whole operation ran pretty smoothly. We weren’t in our busy season right now, but some visitors did choose Strawberry for their summer vacation destinations. My least favorite part about the job was the paperwork. With my experience from the home improvement store, I took on a lot of the ordering for the inn. I was in the middle of checking on shipments when my phone rang. It was unusual to see Cody’s name on the caller ID, he usually just contacted Hayes directly these days.
“Good morning, Cody.”
“Hey, Blair. Did Hayes get to his camp on time this morning?”
“Right on time. He did give me some shit about treating him like he was a kid this morning through.”
Cody chuckles, “I’m sure he did.”
“What’s with the phone call, Cody?”
“Am I not allowed to call to get updates on some huge life events for my kid?”
“Of course, you can call for that,” I sigh, “but you haven’t called me about that forever. You usually just talk to Hayes directly.”
“You’re right, maybe there was something else I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Okay…” I draw out.
“I know we talked about Hayes staying in Strawberry this summer, but I was thinking about it again and I just want to know if you’ll reconsider.”
I should have known this was coming. Since our split, Hayes has spent at least a month of his Summer Break with Cody. He was able to experience things that I could have only dreamed of. Hayes traveled more of this world than I could imagine, but I was happy he got the chance to take those trips with his dad and spend the time bonding. This year was different, Hayes had applied for this camp with the fire academy and then wanted to start taking classes at the community college. Cody seemed understanding at first, but I expected that there would be some pushback.
“It isn’t up for me to reconsider, Cody. Hayes is the one that made the choice. He’s already enrolled in the community college, if he backs out now he’s going to lose the money we’ve paid.”
“If money is the issue I can help with that, Blair.”
“No,” I cut him off abruptly. “It isn’t about the money. I mean, it is, but we don’t need you swooping in to take care of his college classes. Hayes was very proud of being able to pay for the class himself.”
“He spends every Summer with me and this is the last one before he turns eighteen. He’s still a minor, Blair, and I’m still his dad.”
“I am well aware that you’re his dad, but that doesn’t change the answer.”
“If I wanted to I could make you change your mind.”
“Really, Cody? What are you going to do? Get a lawyer involved?”
“If I have to.”
“I’m sure that would go over well for you. You don’t attempt to put any parental visitation in place until your son is three months away from his eighteenth birthday, I’m sure the judge would get right on that case.”
“Damn it, Blair, you make it sound like I’m a deadbeat dad!”
“I’m not making it sound like anything, Cody. This is the agreement that we made. Not one time since moving home have I said no to Hayes going to see you. Do not come at me now just because he made a choice that you’re not okay with.”
“I just want to spend time with my son,” he says exhaustively.
“You’re a smart guy, I’m sure you can figure it out.”
“That’s all you’ve got to say?”
“Yeah, Cody, that’s all I’ve got to say. I have to go now, I have work to do.”
“Fine.”
“Bye, Cody.”
“Bye, Blair.”
He hangs up first and I let the phone fall from my hand onto the desk. Even all these years later, co-parenting hasn’t gotten easy.