"Kabhi hai ishq ka ujala...
Kabhi hai maut ka andhera..
Batao kaun bhesh hoga...
Main jogi banu ya lootera...."
(Sometimes there is light of love.....
Sometimes it's the darkness of death...
I don't know who i am....
A saint or a monster....)
Prithvi's pov
I stood there rooted while she slapped me back to back. I don't know how many slaps she gave me but i felt a slight stinging pain on my cheeks after she walked away from the room.
I keep looking at her way. I saw the divorce paper fallen in the floor. This paper is giving more pain to my heart. It was feeling like she has just shoved an irod rod through my systems.
I sat on the bed abruptly. I started to take deep breathes just to calm down my raging senses. How could she sign the paper so easily?? She can slap me as much as she can, i will not going to stop her. But she can't do this! She cannot sign that paper so easily and leave me like this.
You deserve this Prithvi!
I know i did mistakes in my past. Once i was so reckless to get this divorce that i didn't think twice before abusing her in multiple ways!!
But now everything has changed. I love her so much. I cannot live without her. I cannot see her going away with some stranger just like that. I want her back in my life at any cost. Otherwise i will turn crazy.
So, what will you do?? Are you going to force her???
No. How can i force her?
Then what?? Leave her alone Prithvi! She don't want to stay with you. She hates you! Atleast show some respect to her decision.
Nooooooo.... a big noo....she is mine. Mine to cherish. Mine to love. Mine to hold. Mine to kiss.
I will not let her go. I will try and try. I will try till that point when she will realise that noone can love her more than me.
We are meant to be together. She also loves me. She is just scared to show that. She is scared that again i can abuse her. I will show her how much i love her. She will realise what she meant to me. More than her nothing in this world matter to me. My every breathing is written on her name.
You are just a fucking abuser Prithviraj Khanna!
Shut the fuck up!!!
I was so stressed out with my inner voice that i started to punch the wall forcefully.
You had hurt her! You tried to sell her! You fucking slapped her!! You called her names!! You humiliated her uncountable ways!! You broke her wrist!! You used her as a toy just for your own fucking illness!! You showed her multiple tantrums and took away her mental peace!!
Do you really deserve that angel????
Shut up!! Shut up!! Shut up!!
I will hurt myself. I want to feel the pain which i gave her. I kept on punching the wall until my hands started to bleed as hell. Blood were dripping from my knuckles. I sat on the floor and cried out by pulling my hair.
"You can't leave me like that sejal.....i will die without you.....oh god...this pain is too much to handle...i can't..i can't...."- i cried and sobbed hard.
I never knew that one day i will be a crying mess for her. Why why why??? Why i didn't believe in Dadu and accepted her that time.
It was feeling like everything is slipping away from my hold and i can't do anything. My life is leaving my body.
"Oh god....i want her.....please...."
I never felt that much helpless before. I banged my head to the nearby wall madly.
"Come back to me sejal....please....."
I don't know how long i was lying there. I stood up at midnight and walked towards a bar. I can see dry blood stains on my knuckles. My knuckles are now swollen badly.
I don't care. I will not treat my wounds. I entered the bar and took a corner. I started to drink. The pain and sorrow is covering all my senses.
I keep drinking and drinking until i was fully drunk. I laid like a lifeless body into one corner.
"Where are you sejal? Can't you see my pain....i will ruin myself....please come and hold me.....I'm feeling alone...so...so....alone....please baby come to me....how can i get you again? If i got chicken pox, will you come back to me?? I'm even ready to get any disease sejal...."
I felt a hand on my thighs. I opened my tearful eyes and saw a striper pressing my thighs and winking at me.
"Get lost"
I stated in a slurry tone and stood up. I walked out of the bar. I called Abhay. I can't drive now.
"Hello little...brother...come....and...get..me..I'm drunk...."- i said and laughed.
"Bhai where are you?? Are you alright?? You never get drunk like that"
I can hear his tensed voice. I chuckled deeply.
"She left me....she signed that fucking divorce paper....i will kill that lawyer tomorrow....i...told...him..to not...give that...paper...to...anyyyone..but that...fucker....can...you...hire...a supary killer"
I was feeling like to vomit. I immediately sat beside the road and started to throw up. My stomach is hurting as hell.
Suddenly i felt a flash at my face.
Some fucker reporter has probably taken my photo. It will be a big headline for their newspaper that Prithviraj khanna is drunk and throwing up on the road.
But really i don't care about all these shit now. I just want my sejal back in my life. Again tears brimmed into my eyes.
Fuck! Fuck!!
From when i become like a cry baby??
I saw Abhay's car is coming on my way. He came out and held me.
"You are stinking so bad bhai...."- he said by scrunching his nose.
I just chuckled and got inside his car.
"What happened to your head??? What are you doing bhai???"- he started to check my wounds.
I smiled at my little brother. Though he is my stepbrother but he loves me a lot.
"Are you really crying for a woman???"- he asked me with frowning.
"Ssshshhh....my wife....she is not just a woman....she is my life...my...sejal....my...love"
I drifted into sleep immediately.
When my sleep broke i found myself on the bed. My whole body was paining so much, while my head is bursting in extreme pain. I tried to move my hand and immediately felt an excruciating pain in my hand muscles.
"Damn!!"- i groaned in too much pain.
I went inside the washroom and took a shower. My knuckles burned more when water connected to my wounds. It was swollen badly.
I came downstairs after getting ready and saw Aniket uncle, Monika aunty and my Dad along with Prisha were sitting at the dining. They all are looking serious.
When my dad saw me, he threw the newspaper at me.
"What is this??? How can you hamper our prestige like that??? And what is all this?? You are looking like a ghost!! Are you taking part in street fights like some local goons???"- he was shouting so loudly.
Aniket uncle tried to calm him down.
"Relax Shekhar....may be he has his own reasons....Prithvi what happened last night? Why you left the party so suddenly? Did you two had a fight last night? Listen beta, you are going to spend the life together, so it's important to speak and solve the matter....i...."
I immediately stopped Aniket uncle by showing my hand.
"You are getting the whole thing wrong uncle...we already broke up few days back....ask her..."- i said in my calm tone and i know i had dropped a bomb in this room.
Everyone keep looking at me in shock.
"I love only sejal...my legally wedded wife"- i stated as calmly as possible.
"What???? But you are not even ready for the marriage??? I heard from Prisha that you hate that girl so much"- Monika aunty was sounding so shocked and restless.
"That was past aunty....everything has changed now....now i would like to end this topic here....and i will appreciate if you all never try to convince me in any way...and i will appreciate more if all of you behave politely with my wife...because i will not tolerate any humiliation of her...."
I immediately walked away by leaving everyone in shock.
Sejal's pov
I entered the dressing room and was shocked to see the wall. The plaster of one corner has came out. I closely looked that part of the wall and saw blood.
I hold my head and sat into the chair. He was here. He has hurt himself! This man is really crazy and getting into my nerves badly.
Suddenly i heard shouting from outside. I hurriedly came out and saw few doctors were standing by hanging their head low.
"You all are fired....this is my hospital and i will not tolerate any negligence here....get out...never ever show your face here"
I was stunned after seeing his temper. He is looking so deadly and dangerous.
"Now bring me all the past records of medicines....i will fire everyone today from this hospital"- he walked away straightly from there.
I gulped hard. I'm getting scared with his presence. Why this bad temper??
Don't try to act so innocent sejal....you really don't know why is he behaving like this??
I closed my ears.
I don't want to know. I have nothing to do with this monster.
I saw priya and she immediately showed me a newspaper.
"Look at the news....he has lost so many deals for this...look how reckless he is and also a druggy and a drunken monster...you were always right...he is not a good person"
I don't know why but i felt like to slap priya. I hold the newspaper and keep looking at his photo.
Suddenly my supervisor appeared at the sight.
"Listen sejal...we need a favour...Mr. Prithvi is not in his best mood today...he is firing everyone...now, noone is ready to bring this files to him...can you do this sejal please??"
"Why me?"- i asked him in a daze.
"Because you are the most calm and composed doctor we have"
I grabbed the bunch of files from his hand and walked towards his room.
Are you not scared of him??
No!
Why?? He is a monster afterall!
He cannot hurt me. I really don't know from where my instinct is continuously saying that he can never hurt me again.
But is it so?? Why that much confusion?? In one hand i keep accusing him but why the other side of mine is screaming that he can never abuse me again.
I knocked the door and entered with the file. He didn't lift up his head from his laptop. I saw his face. He is really looking like a storm. His head has a small wound and i can see blot clots near his wound. Then i saw his knuckles and shrieked at the site. His knuckles were wounded so deep. I can see torn skins on his knuckles.
He can get infection!
My heart crumbled painfully at the sight. He should treat his wounds.
"Leave those files here and you may go"
His voice is hoarse.
But i stood there silently. I was feeling like to cry.
"Leave"- he said in his cold and calm voice.
"Why are you firing everyone?"- i finally asked him in a low voice.
"None of your business"- he stated so coldly.
I felt hurt! He is not even staring at me.
"They are doctors....you can't fire them like that"- i said little angrily.
But he didn't gave me any reply and keep typing on his laptop.
"Why are you so angry?"
Silence!
Lump has formed into my throat.
"I slapped you last night"- i said with a shaky tone.
I was never ever a rude person. I didn't able to sleep last night.
"I slapped you six times"- i cried silently.
I saw him clenching his jaw. But he didn't say anything. He is angry for the slaps may be.
"Did you hurt yourself last night??"- i asked in a low voice while silent tears make their way down to my cheeks.
"Leave"- his voice is inaudible but i understand the he is gritting his teeth.
"You should treat your wound...."
Within a second he strode towards me and pinned me to the wall by caging me from both sides. His eyes were red and his nostrils were flaring.
"What you want???? Why are you roaming around me??? You want me to force you?? You want me to tie you up with me??? I'm controlling myself so much around you sejal....because you will not going to like if i follow my heart......you want to stay away from me, then do not come near me......i don't want to cross any limit.....you don't even know what kind of volcano is going inside me.....I'm controlling this with my all power....now just go......."
His each and every word was so intense that i felt shivers down my spine. I keep looking into his eyes dumbfoundedly.
"You cannot hurt me"- i said with a crying tone.
"That's why I'm staying away from you....don't push me further....if you keep moving around me like that, i will loose my control and claim you forcefully......"
An electric jolt ran through my skin. He slowly left me and again went back to his desk.
I was feeling difficulty in breathing. I immediately left the file into the table and almost ran away from there.
The day went on like that. His words were ringing in my ear. Why he is that much complicated??
In the evening, a conference meeting has been called. Every doctor went there.
After entering the room i saw him sitting very calmly. He was not looking at any of us, specially at me.
"Okay, i have decided few things...."- he started the speak.
I can see everyone is scared of his mood including my supervisor. Everyone is staring at him by holding their breathe .
"I have fired few doctors in the morning....i want them to come back. I want to give them a second chance"
That was a shock for us.
"Second thing...i want to buy chemo machines for this hospital....i don't think new cancer units are needed right at the moment..."
That was a super shock for me. I keep staring at him like he has grown horns. I was not believing in my ears. Is he the same man who rejected this proposal at the very first day of his visit!
"Tomorrow, new machines will be installed here....now meeting is over"- he stood up and walked away from there.
Everyone left the conference room apart from me. I was thinking so deeply. I don't know what is happening around me.
Who will show me the right path?
I came out of the hospital and immediately my breathing hitched in my throat when i see Mrs Monika standing at the entrance.
She saw me and immediately came near me. She has a bag in her hand.
I'm feeling so much scared and nervous. My childhood memories were playing in my mind where she and that old lady was beating my mother with their shoes.
I took few back steps out of fear.
"You are sejal right??? I know what you exactly want...take this money and get the hell out of Prithvi's life....i can give you more money...just leave this city....Prithvi and Prisha loves each other....Prithvi just has a small infatuation with you...take this money and move from here"
My legs were shaking. I took back steps and immediately a strong pair of arms took me on his embrace. I immediately buried my face to that broad chest.
My instinct is saying this is the safest place i can ever get.