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Manik couldn't wait for this horrendous night to be over. It had stirred up everything that did not need stirring. Mainly, it had knocked out Nandini so he hated it more than anything. Words would fail him if he had to describe exactly what he felt when he gathered a collapsing Nandini in his arms, two hours ago.
It was 4 am in the morning yet Manik was far away from being sleepy courtesy to the unconscious woman in front of him. He had immediately picked her up to get her settled on her bed. He had checked her pulse, the minute he laid her down under the warmth of her soft comforter only to find it stable so he understood that she was as good as sleeping which is why he did not attempt to wake her up.
But that left him awake, wondering what happened in just a span of one day. He loved their group, yes but he realized today that his feelings for Nandini was leaps and bounds ahead when it came to intensity. He strongly resented Jeanette today, no matter how justified she was on her part and just because she had hurt Nandini so much.
Manik understood Nandini more than even she knew because he let her believe so and today he knew that she reached her breaking point right when he heard her warn Jeanette about moving in with Sameer only if she was ready for it. It took him some time but he recognized that Nandini's biggest demon was being unable to make people stay with her. He might have missed it just like everyone else but that conversation during Mukti's wedding had enlightened Manik about how much she dreaded it when her closest people left her with bitter goodbyes. She hadn't used clear words but he was great at reading between lines so he got every unsaid sentence of her speech.
Her trusting nature didn't help much either because that was why she let in people back, effortlessly. Not that he was complaining about it as it was the only reason that they were here today this way in spite of that falling-out from five years ago but he has been afraid that people around her could exploit it which is what happened today.
This one was going to maim her to no end because the damage was relatively higher. She had cut people out of her lives, though not deliberately, just to make room for the four of them only to be abandoned by her best friend. Nandini might not have kept count of all that she did for Jeanette because best friends don't do that but Manik did and thus he was furious more than ever. He knew that Nandini might not even be mad at Jeanette for how she behaved but he was never going to forget or forgive her for this.
He bent down to place a kiss on Nandini's forehead that was lighter than a feather before walking out of her room with no intention of leaving her house. The last thing he wants is for her to wake up to an empty house. She needs to know that she has people who won't leave her, no matter what, and he was going to make sure that he makes her feel all that with his presence.
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"Thanks!" Manik heard that soft voice, the first thing in the morning as he felt himself waking up from his not-so-deep slumber. He perceived that Nandini wasn't expecting him to open his eyes given how she was running her hands through his soft tresses which stopped instantly as she saw him waking up.
He did not want to make her uncomfortable but at the same time he was done holding back. He wanted to take steps further into whatever it is that they were doing even if it meant baby steps. Hence, he pulled her down next to him on the couch that he was lying down on.
"It is okay!" Manik whispered, feebly as he eyed her form. She had her eyelids shut, tightly, at the abrupt pull, making her look all the more adorable for his taste.
"How are you feeling, now?" Manik questioned her as he engulfed her in a bear hug by putting his hands around her neck. She clutched his sweater-vest, firmly, near his waist making him grin. It meant that she was just nervous and not uneasy about their position.
"This is new!" Nandini mumbled to him. He chuckled at how his one little stunt had propelled everything else out of her senses.
"You like it?" Manik, nonetheless, decided to continue down the road that Nandini had begun walking.
"Mm... yeah, I guess." Nandini responded as she found herself letting her guards down. She made herself comfortable by tucking her head between the valley of his neck and wrapping her hand around his waist. Her rational part of the brain was busy in kicking her for what she was doing right now but this tranquility that she felt was something for which she could trade everything in her possession.
Nandini was lost in her own 'wonderland' as Manik referred to it that she failed to take into account that Manik sucked a sharp breathe when she rest her head in that position. The soft skin of her face against his bare neck for the first ever time had its sweet effect on him. He absolutely loved it so he knew that he intended to do this more often now that he had tested it.
"What were you thanking me for?" Manik quizzed after a few moments passed between them in absolute silence.
"Earth to Alice!" Manik called her when she didn't respond to his question. He tilted his head back to have a clear look of her face only to find her eyes fixed on his chest making him realise that she had noticed his tattoo. He knew that it would intrigue her if she ever got to look at it and he was glad that she had seen it finally.
There was a small broken heart inked near his collar bone but it was inclined inwards at the middle making it seem quite different that other broken hearts which fall apart.
"Does it mean that it's a heart in forming? Like two pieces coming together to form a whole heart?" Nandini quizzed after a short moment, without looking up, as she realised that he was aware of what had caught her attention.
"That's an interesting way to look at it but no... I got this two years ago when I was feeling particularly down for no reason. It's a symbol of hope that even when broken there's a chance that things can be brought back together. That little inward inclination is the small hope that we always have from life to make things better when we're at our absolute worst" Manik explained it in a tender voice while gazing directly into her eyes.
"When did you feel that you were at your absolute worst?" Nandini felt like she was in a daze, the moment their eyes connected. She didn't realise it but she asked him that, slowly.
"You wouldn't believe me even if I tell you." Manik replied with a miniscule smile.
"I wouldn't dare!" Nandini mumbled to him and gestured to their proximity with her eye-movements.
"The first time I saw you smile at Randhir with your love-filled eyes, that was the one. I know, I was sort of with Alya by that time but to come to terms with how you could never look at me that way, killed me." Manik confessed feeling no shame in admitting his raw feelings. It was a long road to this point but he was glad that they were finally at a place where he could tell her everything that he hasn't been able to tell anyone else simply because they'd never understand where he's coming from and would rather judge him for this.
Truth be told, that might not even be the time he felt the worst but he just thought that it was the perfect opportunity to confess these things to her. The mere enlightenment of his about her feelings for him in the past had shook loose all of his guards. It was like he got a go-ahead signal to act upon his feelings for her right now because he was now more sure than ever about their connection and chemistry.
"I looked at you that way for a long time but you didn't notice. I, obviously, do not blame you for it. Just pointing it out that for the longest time, I was all heart-eyes for only you and you alone." their eye-contact might be giving her some sort of confidence supply because those words wouldn't just drop out of her mouth had it been under any other circumstances.
"What if I say that I can still see those heart-eyes for me, right now?" Manik asked, teasingly.
"Then I'd say that, Mr. Malhotra, you are extremely....... Delusional!" Nandini yelled, laughingly while Manik came to terms with how she freed herself from his firm hold.
"This ain't over, Murthy!" Manik challenged.
"Bring it on!" Nandini accepted it gracefully. She couldn't hold back her excitement from showing on her face. She felt like a teenager crushing over the most attractive guy in school. For once, she was happily pushing back her rational side that could ruin all this for her. How bad could it really get? And what did she have to lose?
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"How is Nandi?" Sameer questioned Manik over the phone as soon as he answered his phone. He wanted to check on her and he knew that Manik was the only one who'd know about how Nandini was, for real.
"Take a guess, if you can." Manik sighed as he watched Nandini prepare lunch for the two of them, lost in her thoughts. Their morning was wonderful but it progressed into Nandini retracting herself back into her shell and Manik being stubborn about not wanting to leave her alone.
"It is bad here as well. Jen hasn't stopped crying since the moment we reached home last night." Sameer told him reminding himself of how he just put Jeanette to sleep after she, finally, wore herself out from all the crying. True that Jeanette made that impulsive decision of leaving her best friend but she was devastated by how she came to that decision. A lot of people push things away before it can hurt them without giving it the benefit of doubt, even once, which is exactly what Jeanette had done. She anticipated losing Nandini and before something like that could actually happen, she herself walked out of it. Given what Nandini meant to her, Jeanette felt torn apart from the inside for what she had done to herself and Nandini.
"She made the choice, didn't she? I don't get it. Why is she upset? Isn't she excited to be living with you- her live-in boyfriend?" Manik had no intentions of masking how pissed he was at Jeanette for doing what she did to Nandini.
"Yeah, I don't think she has registered what we've actually done with respect to this relationship. She might take some time to get out of her trauma from what she found about Nandini." Sameer knew that Nandini had done nothing to hurt Jeanette but if Manik was going to get defensive then even he could do that for his girlfriend.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Manik deadpanned. Sameer better have a good enough explanation for what he said.
"Nandini is no victim in this, alright? Jen, sure, did come off as impulsive and aggressive but Nandini is the reason why she did that... Nandini hasn't made Jen feel secure about their friendship which is why all this happened." Sameer put forth, kicking himself in the back of his mind because he knew that he was spewing bullshit but he wanted to defend Jeanette, somehow, so he said all that without any second thoughts.
"How the hell can you say that? You and I haven't been a part of their lives for that long to make judgements about who did what so please, shut up! Go ask your devastated girlfriend about why is she so heartbroken about leaving Nandini behind and you'll get your answers for the bullshit you just spoke." Manik grit his teeth while saying that to Sameer. Oh, how he wished he could just punch something!
"You are blinded by what you feel for Nandini or else even you could see how she's hurt Jen. Snap out of it Manik! Nandini is no saint in all this. She did not do her part as a best friend and that is why all of this happened." Sameer finished, half expecting Manik to tell him off for what non-sense he was spitting but he was taken aback to hear Nandini's soft voice from the phone.
Manik hadn't noticed Nandini coming towards him in all the agitation. After Manik's monologue, Nandini snatched his phone to make this stop but she heard all that Sameer had to say for her, making it clear to her about what side he was on regarding this matter.
"Tell Jeanette that I feel sorry and I wanna talk to her whenever she is ready to talk. Bye, Sam!" Nandini did not wait for Sameer to respond to her and simply hung up.
"Don't ever fight with anyone because of me or for me. I hate it!" Nandini told him in a stern tone while handing his phone back to him.
"You want me to sit back and let everyone trash talk about my people? Let me tell you something, Nandini... I. am. not. that. man. If you want that then go back to Randhir, for all I care because he's the kind of man that you want. He'll have all the faith in you and not care about what others say about you. I, for one, cannot listen to anyone spew crap about my people in my presence. I am flawed like that and if you don't like it then I am okay with keeping my distance." Nandini's tone was piercing for Manik and especially when he was just trying to defend her honor without stepping on her toes. Manik spat all that in a fit of rage that he was already feeling because of his interaction with Sameer and turned to leave only to be stopped by a tug on his elbow.
"I didn't mean to offend you. I am sorry." the vulnerability in her voice instantly made Manik guilty for lashing out on her. She deserved comfort and warmth. Not, his unresolved issues about Randhir which was nowhere related to the issues at hand.
He did not need to be held back to support her. He could do it all his life without any complaints. He might say things in anger but none of it could make him leave her. It was easy to go away from her life when there was no hope of being together, five years ago but now when they were actually building something together for them, he wouldn't dare to throw it all away for any damned thing.
He removed her hand from around his elbow only to put it on his back as he hugged her close. He muttered a faint 'Sorry' to her before dropping a chaste kiss on the side of her forehead. He sent out a silent prayer with closed eyes- 'Help me make everything better for her.'
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Rate the chapter between 1-10.
Is it important that the person who takes care of you at your worst must be your partner? If not, would it change how you feel for them?
Manik and Nandini are finally exploring more of their feelings. Do you think they'd be courageous enough to admit it to each other and give each other a chance?
What do you think about the end part of this chapter? Would you fight on behalf of your loved ones if our would you let them fight their own battles and just let them know that you have their back?