Life is Funny Like That

By Irlylikewaffles

1.6K 90 18

[Completed Novel] Burned by his past, Adrian is a salty human with a knack for avoiding romance like it's th... More

I'll chew you out for stealing my piece of art that's prettier than ya face, etc
Wun. Confetti
Too. Weeds or Flowers?
Thry. Curse Long Legs!
Foor. No Potatoes at All
Fyv. The Green Lump
Sicks. When the Weirdo Breaks in
Sevin. Secret Spilling
Ate. #Relatable
Nyn. Running is Overrated
Tehn. My Most Pinterest-y Chapter
Alevin. Chasing Puddles
Tawelv. Sunflowers and Regret
Thertine. I got excited with descriptions, be nice
Foortine. Boys Don't Cry
Fihftine. Bloody Cookie
Sickstine. Gummy Bears and Depression
Sevintine. Ink is Permanent
Ateine. Daffy's day
Nyntine. Just for Smiles
Twuntee. Kinda feel like ripping your heart out today
Twuntee-wun. More Than Waffles
Twuntee-too. Stupid. Cuz That's What Love is
Twuntee-thry. The Cure for Depression
Twuntee-foor. Resurfacing
Twuntee-fyv. Broken and Bright
Twuntee-sicks. Buy one, Get one Free
Twuntee-ate. Toby (arc)
Twuntee-nyne. Insatiable (arc)
Thyrtee. The Literal Best (arc)
Thyrtee-wun. Love-Sickness, a Lethal Disease
I'll be darned if you read this last author's note

Twuntee-sevin. A Horrible Fate (Kimmy's arc)

26 1 0
By Irlylikewaffles

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Utterly awestruck, Daffy and Adrian carefully sit down in the booth, Kimmy and Noel taking the other side. They all look at each other, a different face stuck to each of them. Surprise and confusion, silent scolding, and utter amusement.

Noel grins, his hands cupping his chin as he soaks in their faces.

"How's the pie?" he asks, wiggling his brows at Adrian's forgotten raspberry slice. "I always get caught by the cooking time for my raspberry recipes, they make quite a touchy deal, I'll say."

No words come out of Adrian's gaping mouth. 

"Haha, you look like goldfish, the both of you. I guess we have some explaining; Kimmy, how 'bout you tell the story? You tell it so well," Noel nudges Kimmy with his elbow, his eyes not leaving the view of Adrian and Daffy's puzzled surprise.

Kimmy mumbles something, but eventually lifts her face.

"Back in the 80's, we were seniors in high school."

"Haha, you had a mullet, remember?" Noel sniggers.

"Yes, Noel, laugh it up." Rolling her eyes, Kimmy adjusts her bracelets. "Anyways,"



~~~~

~Life Can be Pretty Funny~
Kimmy and Noel's story
an abrupt side-story by me

~~~~


Kimmy, at fifteen years old, had a glare that could literally stab the receiving end. The crowd of rowdy and uncontrollable students often dropped to silence in her presence, even so much as parting for her majestic and demanding air.

It happened on a sunny day. The clouds were puffy and sparse and even the grass looked to be a tad bit too warm as its little moisture was sucked dry by the scorching sun. 

Those two laser beam eyes swept over the wide hallway of the town's high school and came to stop on just one boy. She only had to know one thing about the chosen person; if they had an allowance. And thanks to a handy super power she knew she possessed, she could tell who had allowance money stashed in their socks and who didn't.

The chosen boy was innocent looking enough, wearing a gingham button-up, tucked into freshly ironed slacks. Not a hair was out of place on his combed and gelled head. His back was turned to all the silent gazes with their slack-jaws and tense stances. The boy was arranging his books on the shelf, seemingly lost to the surroundings.

Only for a moment though. Kimmy marched up to the unassuming boy and tapped his shoulder. He turned around, a little surprised to see a girl, three inches taller than him, staring him down.

The science book, gripped tight in his hands, was brought up to his chest as a shield. He pulled in a deep breath.

"You." Kimmy pointed at his face, her finger coming within inches of his nose. "Pizza."

Two words. That's all it took. And then a hand came out of nowhere, catching his wrist and pulling him out of the building. 

Noel looked over his shoulder to see sympathetic eyes and shaking heads of pity, deeming him lost to this world. What was going to happen to him? What did he do to deserve such a horrible fate? What was this fate that earned him such despairing faces from his peers? Was she going to turn him into pizza?

The boy was shocked into silence, no words coming out like they often did when he was nervous. Like a fish out of water, taking it's last minute of life in, he half-walked, half-ran behind the girl as she dragged him towards the pizza parlor.

In these moments, only Kimmy and her past victims knew the truth of why she drug him to the pizza place. Being Kimmy, having the mind of Kimmy, she forgot her satchel like many things, and needed someone to mooch off of because she was hungry and eating in the cafeteria with the losers was a sturdy no.

Soon enough, the strangers found themselves, sitting in the ripped, red and white striped booth, a large peperoni pizza between them.

Noel couldn't help himself but stare at her ink-stained arms. She didn't seem to mind though, or didn't notice, he was unsure. Her eyes were wandering in other places, always bored and looking for the next thrill.

The next thrill.

A group of bikers, maybe a gang, or is that just what the Catholic, sheltered part of him thought?

Her brandy eyes discovered them and she was caught by intrigue. Her pizza began to disappear at a slower pace.

Noel, snagged by curiosity, snuck a glance to where she stared to find the group to be a year or two older, seniors or drop-outs, he couldn't figure. Their leather jackets and smooth pompadours didn't go unnoticed by the customers around them, especially the girl wearing baggy overalls with white tennis shoes so scuffed, they could pass as black.  

Unimpressed with the whole scene, he turned back around to his meal, trying not to notice as the group took the table beside theirs.

"Hey gorgeous, why don't you sit with us, instead of this greasy dork?" The one closest to them taunted. A few snickered aloud, amused with his words. He raised a brow, waiting for her response.

Immediate dislike surfaced inside Noel. The feeling was foreign and uncomfortable, but all of a sudden, his appetite had disappeared and he felt like taking the exit, getting away from those slackers. Why did she stare so intently? Why was that so annoying to him?

Kimmy didn't give an instant answer. She mulled her words carefully but not in time for Noel's actions.

Something in him made him squirm, and then he wiggled, and then his hand reached for hers and it was sudden, like a need for escape as if it were air.

Kimmy let out a weak protest before gabbing the pizza box as they made their way to the exit. But she made no effort to pull away. Intrigue had gripped her in its sensation and for the first time, she actually looked at the boy holding her hand.

It was a random choice, a no-brainer when it came to choosing cogs to pay for pizza. As long as they had money, they would do. She brought her victims to the pizza place; they payed because of either admiration or sheer fear of her, but either way, she got pizza for free and that was that. But today. Today was different.

The boy, she didn't even know the name of, glared down at the passing squares of sidewalk as his hand pinched her fingers to blue and black.

The pizza went forgotten in her grip, falling sideways and folding into a calzone inside the box.

"What's your name?" 

The girl's voice made Noel freeze. He turned around to face her only to pull her closer by their joined hands.

His ears went pink as he backed up, letting go of her hand.

"My name's Noel."

"What's the deal with leaving Vinny's? Didn't like the song?" She teased, but for some reason her voice wasn't unkind. Had she ever really said anything unkind before? Maybe bully was the wrong term. Perhaps misunderstood.

A strange feeling arose as he concluded she was the type that wouldn't hurt a fly. How strange. The whole school was quick to judge and perhaps she took advantage of that, but how many people really saw past the cold and steely demeanor?

"The song, the crowd, not my thing," he mumbled, remembering his glare.

"I guess you already know my name..." she looked down. The sound of her voice went a little lower.

Everybody knew her name. Icy Kim.

He bit his lip, unable to look her in the eye. The whole school knew her name. 50% were attracted to her, the other half was terrified. Not just a few felt like they belonged on both sides.

Fear was what made him pay for the pizza, but a stabbing guilt marched to his stomach. Did he judge this girl just like the rest of the school?

"Come on, Christmas," Kimmy shoved him in the back towards the ledge of the sidewalk. They sat down and she opened the box between them. "Leave a slice for me."

Noel obliged, watching the girl take off her backpack, fold the pizza box around the last slice, and stuff it in. There were no books or pencils, just pizza.

"Your pizza holder?" He motions to her backpack, his cheeks full of crust.

"What else would it be for?" She snorted.

Noel stuffed the last bite of crust, choosing to ignore the admiration bubbling inside him.

"So, why's your name Christmas?" Kimmy asked as she brushed her hands of any crumbs and tucked them between her patched knees.

"It's not... Christmas... but my mom and dad's favorite time of the year is Christmas so I guess..." He shrugged, unable to explain the simplest of things.

"Hmm, okay, well I don't think I want to go back to school. If you leave now, you might be able to catch the tardy bell." Kimmy stood. Gripping her backpack, she waved over her shoulder, not sparing another glance at him.

Noel sat still for a while, letting the events sink in. Slowly, he made his way back to school, not quite caring about the bell as it sang the last call. How strange. It usually made him anxious to be late, but there was a nonchalance he couldn't seem to shake. Icy Kim must've rubbed off on him. That was not good.





==============Mar-20-22==============
Pub, Jan-15-23

as promised, a story about Kimmy. when her tattoo was briefly mentioned in... what chapter was that? tawelv. ah yes. it's a little important, i guess... i can explain that paragraph now, can't i? it was probably the most cryptic thing i've written.

i woke up in the middle of the night and furiously wrote this story in a whole day, literally none-stop. forgive the awfully timed scene changes, cliche scenarios, and questionable editing effort (yeahhhhhhh, is it really past-tense or just poorly edited present tense??? don't ask, just tell me you like the idea and it's gonna be a great little story) cuz i am DUN with editing forever {that is a lie, i'm sorry for losing my temper there} (i'll be editing for the rest of my life lol)

i feel bad for my hiatus and making you read a chapter three months after it was supposed to be read so i'll just post all of em rn... cuz i'm smart at planning ahead like that ehaha...

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