The first thing that registered the next morning was pain. My arms were made of lead and it felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer to my back.
"Ohhhh God," I groaned, rolling onto my stomach. Even that small movement sent ripples down my spine.
"Morning Meg!" Kate bounced over to my side. "Isn't it a beautiful morning? The sun is shining and the birds are singing." She gave a happy little sigh and drifted away.
I wondered for the umpteen millionth time how we were members of the same species. Gritting my teeth I rolled to a sitting position. Kate was sort of right. It was a beautiful morning, but my throbbing muscles didn't make it quite as Disneyesque as she had described.
"Back to the rafts." Joe appeared, looking much more reasonably cheerful than Kate.
I nodded. "And we've got the roots now. How close to sealing point are you guys?"
"Pretty close I think," Joe replied. "We can probably start sealing either late today or tomorrow morning."
"That's great!" I stood up and gasped.
"Whoa!" Joe reached out a hand to steady me. "You alright there?"
"Yeah," I lied. "Just a little sore from yesterday."
We made our way over to the fruit pile and grabbed a couple of bananas.
"You know what I miss?" Joe said abruptly, taking a bite of his peeled fruit. "Scrambled eggs."
I looked at him in surprise. That was the closest thing to a complaint that I had ever heard out of Joe. "What made you think of that?"
He shrugged. "I don't know. I just used to have eggs for breakfast, like, every morning. Don't you ever think about little random things that you miss from your old life?"
Of course I did. We all did. We just didn't talk about it because it was too painful. But since Joe had already opened this can of worms. . .
"I miss hockey," I said. "I used to go down to the rink and practice almost every day."
He smiled. "That's cool."
"What are you guys talking about?" It was Brian.
"What do you miss about your old life?" I asked him.
His forehead scrunched as he thought for a minute. "My TV," he concluded.
"I miss my car," Chris said coming up behind us.
"Me too," Joe agreed. "And going out in my parents' boat."
"I miss bacon," I contributed.
There was a collective moan. "Why would you say that?" Brian whined.
I shrugged. "Sorry, that's just what I thought of."
"I miss coffee," Kate entered the conversation.
A small cluster had formed and soon we were all talking at once.
"Alright well as fun as this is, we should really get to work," I interrupted a few minutes later.
Slowly, we dispersed and headed towards the beach. I squinted up towards the sun, reveling in its warmth on my face.
"Meg!" A voice behind me called.
I turned to see Jessie approaching. Her face spoke the words she was about to say before she could open her mouth. "I need to talk to you."
For a day or so, I had actually forgotten about what had happened with Alex and Jessie. Unfortunately, such things always figured out how to catch up with me.
"Okay," I said slowly.
She motioned with her head to the left, away from the cave, and started walking. I followed, a numb sort of feeling spreading through my legs as though they moved by no will of my own.
Jessie led us east across the island until at last she stopped in a small clearing. Her back rose as she took a deep breath before turning to face me.
"I'm so sorry about what happened with Alex," she began. "I never wanted to hurt you and I know he didn't either. You're one of my best friends, Meg. Like family. I never should have jeopardized that."
She paused but when I said nothing, she barreled on. "I've always liked Alex, I'll admit it. But it was clear from the moment he got here that he only had eyes for you..."
"Whoa whoa whoa, back up." I held up my hand. "There's never been anything between Alex and I, EVER."
"Well I don't know about that I guess, but I knew that he liked you and so I told myself he was off limits. I would never had said or done anything. And a few weeks ago, after we made the initial plans about escaping in the rafts, I saw him walk off by himself."
I was beginning to wish I'd never agreed to this conversation, but now I was in too deep to stop.
"I shouldn't have followed him," she continued. "But he looked really upset about something. So I went after him."
She shifted uncomfortably and I dared to hope that she was finished. No such luck.
"When I finally caught up with him, he was just sitting in the alcove with his head down. And so I asked him what was wrong." She paused again. "And... and then he just said "She doesn't really want me, she never really wanted me.""
I looked up. "What?"
Jessie bit her lip and looked at her feet. "Yeah, and then we just started talking and..."
"No wait," I cut in. "What did he mean by that, "she doesn't really want me"?"
Her left hand sought her right shoulder. "That's what I asked him," she said slowly. "And he was like, "She wants Toby. I can't believe I didn't see it before.""
I folded my hands behind my head and exhaled. "Okay Meg, just play it cool," I told myself. "What then?" I asked.
We both knew what came next, but since we had come this far, I wanted to hear her out. "Well, we started talking..." her voice was halting now and barely audible. "And then he.. he was so close to me and.." Tears formed in the corners of her eyes. "I'm so sorry Meg, I don't know what I was thinking. I was just comforting him and everything was fine and then we were kissing and..."
This was news to me. Not that I cared, but apparently all this had happened before I had arrived.
"And then.. We were talking." Jessie went on. "He started saying all these things and.." She stopped. "I think you're a great leader, Meg, and I'm sorry if anything I said made you think I wasn't on your side, because-"
"It's okay," I said firmly. "Really."
She looked up. "What?"
I sighed. "In a week, we are either going to escape the island or die trying. We have stick together now more than ever. Whatever drama has happened in the past needs to stay there. Do you know what I mean?"
Jessie nodded. "Yeah," she said quietly. "Thanks, Meg." She reached out and threw her arms around me, catching me off guard. After a moment, I hugged her back.
"Are my eyes red?" she asked, releasing me.
I checked. "Just a little."
She rubbed at them. "I think I'm gonna go wash up before I start working. I can't have people know that I was crying."
The last part of her statement sounded so defiant, so much like Jessie that I laughed. "Do you want me to come with you?"
She shook her head. "I'm good, but thanks."
I turned to go.
"And Meg?"
"Yeah?"
"Please don't tell anyone about this."
I nodded. "Of course not. I promise."
We shared a smile and then took off in our opposite directions.
My head buzzed as I made my way to the beach. Why would Alex say that about me wanting Toby? Could he have seen us that night on the beach?
But nothing happened, I reminded myself. But maybe it had looked like it to him. I thought about the way Toby had held me when I was crying. Yes, that definitely could have been misconstrued.
Whatever. As much as I hadn't wanted to at first, I was glad that Jessie and I had talked things out. We had little time left to do so and I didn't want to be on uncertain terms with anyone. Toby immediately came to mind, but I pushed that thought away. That would have to wait. After all, we were going to be stuck on a raft with each other for several weeks at least. We would probably be forced to sort ourselves out eventually.