꧁~~~Benget Stark~~~꧂
꧁~~~298 After Conquest~~~꧂
꧁The empty mantle above the empty hearth in the empty Great Hall of Winterfell bears heavily apon Benget. The mantle where the Dawn had been kept for several years before his father had given him the fine milkglass like blade has not seen use. Nothing rests upon it now except for dust and candles that are melted completely all the way to the bottom.
The cleaners and servants have yet to come and clean the hall. After Robert Baratheon's wild feast last night, the Great Hall is leveled to a mess worse than the stables Ben and Jon would have to clean for weeks it seemed whenever they skipped out on Maester Luwin's lessons or were causing some mischief around Wintertown or the likes.
But that empty mantle bears down on Benget like an unseen weight that he himself doesn't understand nor probably ever will. Seven Hells, he himself doesn't even know if he wants to try and understand. Benget is a Dayne and a Stark. A Stark father and a Dayne mother. A Stark father who had broken his marriage vows to his Dayne mother and married another, all for the sake of gaining some sort of alliance.
And maybe because of that, Ashara Dayne is dead. The fact that Ben never got to even meet his mother before is a weight that slowly crushes him in the most painful way possible. He and Jon never grew up with a mother. If either of them could consider Lady Catelyn their mother- which they cannot for the life of them- then the only experiences they have with mothers is abuse, loathing and resentment. The parts of a mother that should never be shown to her children.
Benget never felt like he really belonged here. He didn't feel like he belonged in Dorne when he was down there, either. Anywhere he had gone through the years. Dorne, the Riverlands, the Reach, Dorne, the Stormlands, any of those Kingdoms within the Seven Kingdoms and he did not feel like he belonged to any of them. No family connection to any of it.
The only true connections he feels in this world are with his brother- his twin brother whom he would give anything in keeping safe- and something else. Something he doesn't understand. Something that he feels is waiting for him.
"I remember how you used to sit in here every single night looking up at that mantle until you feel asleep sitting up."
Benget Stark does not move an inch as he sits on a bench to one of the low tables just before the high table in the Great Hall, his father approaching from the entrance off at the other end.
"You always said you dreamed of becoming the Sword of the Morning, just like your uncle."
"The one you killed."
Benget simply states as he does not connect his glowing violet eyes with the grey-blue and tired eyes of the Lord of Winterfell. Ned sighs heavily, moving to the table across from the one Benget is seated behind, taking a seat himself as he groans a little.
"I feel as though I've been getting older for the last sixteen years. My back is as broken as lance after several tilts."
"You've said something like that before many a time."
Benget still does not look to his father, his eyes fixated on the empty mantle gathering dust like the one in Starfall presumably is. An empty castle on the Torrentine River facing Summer Sea. That eerie emptiness has been around for a long time. And Ben figures that empty feeling feeling he draws from it will remain within himself for a very long time as well.
"Benjen tells me that Jon wants to join the Night's Watch.."
"You needn't disguise your knowledge of that fact, Father. You've known all along."
Benget states, now glancing at his Lord Father with a slightly raised brow yet a blank expressions worn.
"All the time whislt growing up here, Jon would discuss the Wall and being a Ranger, hunting Wildlings and White Walkers and whatnot beyond it. Whenever Uncle Benjen came down from the Wall to Winterfell to see our progress, he influenced Jon so much. I just wish he could see that you and Unlce Benjen have had this all planned out for him since birth."
Ned is stunned to silence for a long moment, averting his eyes from the practically glowing ones of his eldest son and heir. He's smart. For the longest time, Ned had trouble coming up with ways to answer his son's questions and whatnot without revealing anything to him. Does it make him a terrible father to withhold the truth to protect him?
"Jon's wanted this all of his life. You know as well as I that no matter what me or Benjen or anyone else could say otherwise, Jon would still want to go to the Wall."
"But he doesn't know what he'd be giving up!"
Benget turns sharply, frustration bubbling onto his features as his fists clench tightly. For someone he loves dearly, Jon can be so fucking blind sometimes.
"He has never known the love of a woman. To have them hold you in their arms like you're their lifeline, the very air that they breathe."
"And have you?"
Ned simply states rather than it sounding like a real question. Benget grows quiet after after comment. No, he had never felt a women's love. Nobody in his life had ever told him in a heated moment that they loved him. Not even in a relaxing and laid back situation, nothing.
Benget Stark simply shakes his head, looking away from his father as Ned sighs heavily.
"It's a terrible thing, really. Choosing what we do with our lives. You've had and still have so many opportunities out there in the world, Ben. Jon...he never had that. Jon always lives in your shadow. You know that he wants to join the Night's Watch so that he can have some semblance of pride that he's won on his own."
"But I can't leave him..not again.."
Benget states, holding his hands together as he looks to the floor, frustration and sadness bubbling up from the pit of his stomach.
"Choices, Ben...it's all any of us have. You can choose to go out there, lead your life the way the wind takes you, or...you can follow where you know your heart is telling you to go."
His father's words are wise. Such wise words that Benget scarcely understands how they form in his mind. He soakes in the words for a short moment, briefly reflecting on then as he nods his head slightly.
But just as Ned finishes his words, Benjen, Robb, and Jon enter the Great Hall, making Benget and Ned look over to them. Ben watches his brother, whom wears a smile as Benjen Stark is in the middle of telling him another story from the Night's Watch. He can see how much his brother wants it. Wants to be his own man. But Benget's heart is screaming at him that if Jon is left alone on the Wall, his life will forever be in danger without him. Benget cannot stand it being away from Jon for too long.
"Think on it."
Benget glances at his father who wears a solemn look in his eyes, nodding slightly as the three others Starks approach.
"You should've seen the lad's face, Jon. The rat had nearly bitten off his entire ear before he even noticed!"
Jon laughs, seeing Benget looking at him already with a saddened face which makes him frown instantly. Standing before the current Lord of Winterfell and the heir to it, Jon eyes his older twin, seeing the look on his face that makes him concerned.
"Have a seat, Jon."
Ned motions to the table which Benget sits at. Jon keeps eyeing Ben, watching for any sort of reaction as his brother's gaze is kept away from him, both hurting him and annoying him at the same time as he takes a seat.
"We're here to talk about the Wall and the Night's Watch."
Ned starts, glancing at Benjen briefly as Benget remains staring at the floor, seemingly a thousand miles away whilst still in the present.
"Are you sure you want to do it?"
Robb asks, a brow raised towards his older brother as Jon nods almost too eagerly.
"Of course I'm sure."
"And what about Arya? Sansa, Bran, little Rickon? What about our brothers and sisters, Jon?"
Benget asks suddenly, turning sharply to Jon as everyone's focus shifts sharply to the eldest Stark child.
"What about our family? Are you just going to leave them like that?"
"What about you? You were off in the South for over a year, so do not lecture me about leaving the family."
"That was different and you know it."
"How is it any different from my choice other than the fact that the Wall has no women to fuck unlike Dorne?"
"Enough, both of you."
Ned cuts in sharply, stopping the two twins from butting heads as Benget scoffs, turning away from the group of Stark men as he nearly bites on his own fist to prevent himself from saying anything too rash.
"My son, you are nearly seventeen years of age, almost a man. And whatever decision you make, everyone here will respect it."
His father glances at him, making Ben scoff slightly whislt still looking away. Jon's eyes remain on the back of Ben's head. For as long as he could remember, he always wanted to be like him. Wanted to do everything he does. But a part of him always wanted to see the world, the same as Benget has. Jon just doesn't truly know what he is in for with the Night's Watch.
And that's what scares Benget more than anything.
He doesn't understand what the Watch is, what he'd be giving up. There is so much more opportunity in life for Jon and Benget wishes he could make Jon climb over his tall wall of stubborn pride to see that. But despite these flaws that are within Jon, the blindness to reality and the delusions of grandeur that makes up the Night's Watch, Benget loves him with all his being. Jon had decided long ago that he would be taking the Black. And Ben had decided long ago that he would follow his brother to the ends of the earth if it ment keeping him from harm.
Reluctantly, Benget turns around, looking into Jon's brownish grey eyes that reflect nothing of there mother, Ashara. The semblance of Jon reflects better on their father, rather than mother. Though, neither ever got to meet her before she passed. The two wolves, white and black, polar opposites yet the same, gaze into each other's eyes for a long and silent moment. The Violet Wolf looks to his brother in understanding, sadness, but also confirmation.
With the smallest nod, Jon sighs in relief. He smiles as Ben gives him a small smile himself, not really meaning anything to the smile as he looks away from his twin. Uncle Benjen stands from his seat, clasping Jon's shoulder with a smile.
"You'll make a hell of a Ranger, Jon. I just know it."
Jon smiles happily as Robb stands up, a smile worn on his face as he quickly embraces his older brother.
"Soon enough, next time we see each other again, you'll be all in black."
"It was always my color."
As their father stands with a slight groan at his older muscles twisting and boans cracking slightly, Jon looks past him to where Benget had just been standing. Only, the Violet Wolf was no longer there. As he shakes his father's hand, he barely catches the sight of curly black hair leaving the Great Hall.
Jon no longer feels as prideful as he had before.
꧁~~~Robb Stark~~~꧂
꧁Robb walks through the halls of Winterfell, unsure really on how he feels about the situation at hand. His older brother, though not the oldest, is going to be leaving for the Wall and for the Night's Watch. And whilst Robb loves having Benget around, the eldest Stark child is never the same without Jon being nearby.
Turning the corner, Robb continues walking down the halls of the Great Keep to make it to Ben's room, where he assumes he is. Benget, though the most joyful Stark, usually, can turn quite quiet at times and often atends to himself rather than partake in any family events. He rarely comes to feasts or gatherings unless Jon was there. The third Stark son can only imagine how the eldest wolf is feeling at the thought of his twin leaving him and his family.
Finally making it to the sturdy and thick oak door, the engravings of a wolf chasing after a star engraved into the wood greets him back. He had expected to hear the telltale sound of a lute singing quietly on the other side, yet there was no sound of the instrument anywhere. Confused, Robb knocks on his brother's door a couple of times before waiting. He waits for a long few moments, concern and confusion building a little as he moves to knock again.
"You can come in, Robb."
Robb slowly opens to the door, peaking his head inside the room that always seemed so forbidden to be in when he was growing up. Just how it usually is with older and little brothers, he supposes. The sight of Benget pulling the sheets off of his bed greets him as he tosses the darkened sheets onto the floor in a slight huff.
"Had another woman in your bed again, did you?"
"Two in one day."
"Is that a new record?"
Ben glances at Robb, smirking slight with a raised brow as he turns back to continue what he was doing. Robb crosses his arms, leaning against the doorframe.
"No, I suppose not. I still remember that story you told about those two sisters in Dorne."
"Mhm. They were definitely something."
Benget finishes throwing his sheets and furs onto the floor to eventually have them changed as he moves across the room. It's only then Robb notices how empty the room itself feels. The books that used to clutter the floor are now stacked neatly on a table across the room, the logs by the hearth are better standing than before and a small set of clothes, mainly dark grey and black clothes, as is usually for the Violet Wolf of Winterfell, is folded neatly by two bags along with the sword Dawn leaning against the wall.
"What's all of this?"
Robb asks as Benget just shrugs.
"I'm getting ready."
"For..?"
"Tomorrow."
He replies simply as Robb huffs in slight annoyance.
"That sure does help explain what you're doing, Ben."
"I'm getting ready to leave tomorrow."
Robb raises a brow of confusion, uncrossing his arms as he looks at his older brother with concern.
"You're headed to King's Landing with Father and the girls?"
"North. I'm going north."
Robb's eyes widen slightly, looking at Benget with shock as he holds a very serious yet calm look on his face and in his eyes.
"But... You're taking the black?"
"Yep."
He replies simply, taking Dawn by the hilt, twirling it once before putting it into its scabbard. But as he did so, the leather of the old scabbard finally tore as Benget cusses quietly to himself as he throws the scabbard onto the floor.
"Remind me later to get the tanner to make a new scabbard for Dawn. Seems she used her old one pretty darn well."
"Ben, you can't be serious?"
"About the new scabbard?"
Benget replies, intentionally sounding a bit stupid as Robb looks at his older brother in shock, shaking his head slightly in total confusion.
"You're leaving to go with Jon to the Night's Watch? To take the Black?"
Benget sighs, nodding as he turns away from Robb.
"You know better than anyone that Jon can be a fucking idiot sometimes. I need to make sure he is okay."
"And what about me? As soon as you swear their vows, you're leaving me to become the Lord of Winterfell whilst Father is the Hand of the King."
"And I believe in you."
Benget turns to Robb, setting a trusting hand onto his shoulder, squeezing lightly as he shakes him a little bit.
"Our family is being divided. Three are going South, and now two are going North. The pack is separating and therefore we are growing weaker. I need you to be strong, Robb. I know you can do it."
"But-"
"Remember what Father always said: "Everything before the word "but" is just horseshit."
Robb chuckles a little, making Benget smile as he shakes Robb's shoulder.
"I know you'll make Fatehr proud. You'll do the North proud, being the next Lord of Winterfell. You'll make me proud, Robb. I just know it."
Letting go of his younger brother by about a year, Benget turns around, taking Dawn and sheathing it in the torne scabbard as best as he could, turning back to the door.
"I'm going to go take this to the tanners over by the blacksmith. They'll have something made by tomorrow, I'm sure."
"I'll come with you."
Benget nods as he smiles at Robb, motioning for him to lead the way as they walk out of his room, Benget shutting the door behind him.
꧁~~~Benget Stark~~~꧂
꧁The tanner had been a bit grumpy today, a sour look on his face and in his eyes but his lips did not speak a word. As the Violet Wolf handed over his torne scabbard for the tanner to use as a starting point for the new one, the tanner's daughter, who's name Benget could not remember for the life of him, leans against the post in the shop, a discrete flirtatious smile on her face as Benget sends a wink back, much to the annoyance to the tanner.
Robb and Ben exit the shop, Robb wearing an amused grin as he knows Benget had probably slept with that girl as well.
The ground is muddy, the sky grey and dull as it has mainly always been as the two brothers make their way through the courtyards. Every so often, the pair would walk past women, many of which would send smiles towards Benget, flushing red as the oldest Stark son just smiles to himself, Robb scoffing with a smile almost every time.
As the pair of brothers walk past the blacksmith, Benget notices Jon there, asking for a sword, describing the lengths and width of the blade as Jon notices his brother's look. Robb stops, noticing the twins looking at each other.
But before either of them can say anything to one another, shouting comes from the gate close by opens up, the sound of horses trampling inside draws their attention. Entering through the gates of Winterfell is the King of the Seven Kingdoms atop his stallion along with their Lord Father and many others, the Kingsguard also in tow. The doors into the Great Keep open, revealing Cersei Lannister as everyone converges on the courtyard entryway. Benget sends a glance to the Queen, immediately noticing the heated glare of emotions from her as he smirks to himself.
Cersei's children remain at her side, the daughter fiddling with her hands as she eyes Benget, whispering with the girl of House Poole, Jeyne, and Sansa standing opposite, annoyed by the talk of the one she refers to as Purple Eyes.
Robert Baratheon bellows with laughter, the spear in his hand bloody at the blade as he lifts it into the air, nearly falling off his horse in the process as a roars in laughter.
"A boar! Oh, what a beast it was!"
He bellows once more as Ned dismounts from his steed, moving to help the King as Benget and everyone else watches him struggle to dismount, drawing Ned and Ser Barristan Selmy, who had rode in behind the King, to make an effort to help him down. As Robert nearly falls, forcing Benget and his brothers to force back laughter, he dusts himself off, a wide smile on his face as he notices the Stark siblings.
"You should have been there, boy! Oh, what a hunt!"
"I'm sure, Your Grace."
Benget bows respectfully, sending a side glance at Cersei as he can see even his presence is making her fury bubble to the surface. He notices that behind the King is the Kingslayer himself, Jaime Lannister. The Lannister seems to wear the same look his own twin is wearing towards the Stark as Benget also smirks at that.
"When you and your family move down to King's Landing, I'll take you and Ned out on a hunt in the Kingswood! What fun it will be!"
Benget nods respectfully for a moment before he shakes his head.
"Forgive me, Your Grace, but I won't be traveling South with you and my father."
Robert pauses his laughter for a moment, looking at Benget with confusion as all eyes are on him and Benget and the King.
"I want you on my Kingsguard, boy. Barristan Selmy, and a Dayne on the Kingsguard once more, that'll be a one hell of a final, "go fuck yourself," to the Mad King!"
He laughs, drawing smiles from many but Benget remains firm, shaking his head respectfully.
"I would have to decline your kind offer, Your Grace."
Jon looks at Benget, a bit confused as an offer to join the King of the Seven Kingdoms' own Kingsguard is a huge honor, no matter the standing of the person being offered the position. Robert looks at Benget in slight disbelief, wondering for a moment whether the Stark is playing with him.
"And why not?"
"I have my loyalties elsewhere."
"The King can do as he likes, get what he wants."
"Aye, he can. But the King cannot take from what cannot be taken from."
Benget's words confuse all in the courtyard as Ben looks around for a brief moment, looking into Jon's eyes a the hint of a smile plays on the corner of his lips before he turns back to the King.
"I am taking the Black."
It is as if a pin is dropped and gasps fill the courtyard, followed by a silence that could drown a crypt. Everyone in the courtyard looks at Benget Stark, the Violet Wolf, possibly the most potentially prodigal person in the entire Seven Kingdoms- possibly the whole bloody world- wishes to take a seat with the Watchers of the Wall. Jon now looks at his older twin like he's completely lost his mind, confusion racking his mind as Benget remains calm, a serious look upon his face as he looks down to the fat King.
"I am to leave tomorrow with my uncle and my brother to join the Night's Watch."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm saying my loyalties do not allow me to accept this generous offer of a position in your Kingsguard, Your Grace."
If the women in Westeros had heard the words uttered from his mouth, they would go crying from Dorne all the way to the Wall when they hear the great Benget Stark, the Violet Wolf of Winterfell, is to live on a seven-hundred foot tall wall of ice. Where White Walkers and whatnot prowl in the night to steal babies when Benget could be making babies with women, instead.
To Ned and Benjen, they won't show it openly, but this is what they wanted all along. Benget didn't want to join the Night's Watch, and he certainly didn't plan on making it such a big announcement, especially not in front of the King. But as Ben looks into Jon's shocked eyes, he smiles brightly, nodding his head before looking to the King once more.
"Let us all feast apon the boar you have killed, celebrate our last night here in Winterfell before we all part ways."
Despite his disappointment in the fact he would not be adding another man onto his Kingsguard, especially such a skilled and young swordsman, Robert Baratheon smiles, nodding his head in great respect for the young lad as he throws his hands up into the air, laughter already returning.
"Let us drink until we cannot drink anymore!"
He roars and the small crowd that had gathered cheers, quickly moving on from the shocking news of the eldest Stark son as they move to enter the Great Keep, pushing slightly against the Queen as the King just does the same, the boar following the Old Boar soon after.
Cersei scowls in anger at Benget, who still wears that stupid smirk on his face. She had been planning since the might previously to make him want her, desire her with all that he has until he was begging her to feel her body on his. But once more, the Violet Wolf had slipped just out of her grasp.
Myrcella smiles a bit sadly, disappointed that Benget would not be traveling the Kingsroad back with her and her family. But her mind drifts back to the black leather scabbard with the engravings she made is still back in her room as she smiles happily, dashing inside to get it as Cersei follows her daughter inside.
Jeyne Poole looks at Benget across the courtyard, biting her lip slightly as Sansa had quickly moved on from the subject at hand, speaking of things like her little Prince Joffrey and how lovely the Southern hairstyles are and such.
But Jon's eyes remain on Benget as his older brother walks away from it all, leaving to be on his own. The sun is slowly fading as is the form of the Violet Wolf as he disappears into the entrance of the Godswood.
꧁~~~Jeyne Poole~~~꧂
꧁Two great feasts in the span of two days is often rare thing. There had been those stories though about a feast in Darry that had lasted four days non-stop after Robert Baratheon's victory at the Trident against the Silver Prince. Though, after what had happened, everyone refuses to speak of it.
Jeyne still works with her needle and thread, finishing up the last few stitches on the black long leather riding gloves that she had been working on for some time now. People drink and laugh but the young girl from House Poole works tirelessly to finish her gift.
Though her gift she is making seems to pale in comparison to the Princess of the Seven Kingdoms' gift she has made for the Violet Wolf, Jeyne has a feeling her...other gift will work the trick a whole lot better.
"Are you even listening to me?"
Sansa asks in a huffed annoyance, waving her hand in front of Jeyne's face, finally catching her attention as she smiles, finishing the thread work on the gloves.
"Gods, you're still working on that stupid gift for my bastard brother?"
"Benget is not a bastard, Sansa."
"Just as good as one.."
Jeyne scoffs, shaking her head in slight annoyance with her best friend as Sansa can be really petty sometimes. Everyone in Winterfell and most of the North has heard how Benget Stark saved his little half-sister from bad men in the Wolfswood. And despite risking him life, Sansa still acts like she hates him even though deep down, Sansa knows that isn't the case at all.
But as the roars of music and laughter seem to drown out, Jeyne notices Benget enter the Great Hall, looking almost utterly lost. It was also no secret that the eldest Stark son does not like large gatherings of feasts and celebrations. The Stark-Dayne is more reserved, preferring his own company or the company of his family over anyone else.
Sansa eyes Jeyne up and down for a moment, seeing how her best friend is looking head over heals for her half-brother. And that's when she actually takes the time to notice her friends dress: violet.
"Are you kidding me?"
"What?"
Jeyne asks in confusion, turning back to Sansa as the Stark girl just scoffs.
"You're trying to seduce him?"
"Well, I thought I was being obvious. Half of the women in Winterfell have stories about him and his-"
"You're disgusting."
Jeyne shakes her head, standing up from her seat as she leaves her friend, moving across the crowded hall of faces, though the Queen's face is nowhere to be seen. Jeyne Poole walks nervously to the man she wants most.
Benget looks all around the hall, looking for the face he had had in search for since he had left the Godswood. Deciding that he isn't here, Benget moves to one of the tables where a woman had just served mote stew and bread, taking two bowls and pieces of bread for himself as he begins to carry them out of the hall.
But Jeyne meets his eyes, catching her for just a moment before he continues looking. Jeyne takes initiative, moving to Benget as she now stands before him, the gloves in her hands to her nervous chest as she gazes up into his practically glowing eyes.
"H-Hello, m'lord."
Jeyne metally curses herself for stuttering like a fool in front of such a man. Benget barely registers her words, still focused on getting the food to his brother
"Hi."
"I'm Jeyne."
Benget nods slightly, stopping as he looks down to the younger girl, seeing the giddy look she is trying so hard to suppress upon her face.
"Umm, I-I made you-"
"Forgive me for the rudeness on my part, Jeyne, but I need to go see someone right now."
Benget walks past Jeyne, leaving her in stunned and still silence for a moment. But before he leaves, he glances over his shoulder once more, meeting her eyes as he shrugs.
"We can...talk later if you want."
Benget had already known what the girl wanted before she even said a word to him. The violet dress to get his attention and whatnot. Sometimes, such attention was overbearing.
"It's the last night in the world."
"I wouldn't miss it, m'lord."
Jeyne's heart beats rapidly as Benget Stark leaves the Great Hall, the bowls of stew being carried out with him.
꧁~~~Benget Stark~~~꧂
꧁He couldn't really place where exactly where Jon could be, but he had a few guesses. Jon's room would probably be the last, considering how Benget knows that Jon thinks that brooding in his room makes him look like a pouty child. As if brooding in the halls or in the courtyards would make any difference, but it's whatever.
The night air is crispy and cold, his warm breath mixing in the chilly air like fire on ice as he makes his way through the courtyards, checking any places he could think of along the way to the only other place he could think Jon could be.
The Library Tower would probably not be the first guess most would make if they had to guess where Jon Stark could be hiding. But often enough, Jon does like to read. Not to the level of Benget, but a good book every now and again never hurt anyone. Looking up into the high tower's window, he can see a single candle shining in the window.
Benget opens the door with his hip, still holding the warm stew in their respective bowls as the smell and sight of old books greets him like anwarm blanket of knowledge and peace. The library is often quiter than the Sept, though not as quiet as the crypts or the Godswood. Now that he thinks about it, there are many different places throughout Winterfell that are very peaceful and quiet. Places where one could find distraction from the troubles of everyday life.
Walking up the spiraling steps leading to the top floor of the tower, Benget enters, seeing Jon sitting at one of the tables in the quiet and relatively dark library, the moonlight reflecting from the single window next to the table against the wall.
Without uttering a word, Benget approaches, placing the bowl in front of Jon who does not meet his eyes as he sits opposite of him, taking two wooden spoons as he holds one out to Jon. But Jon doesn't take it, not even looking at his twin. Benget waves the spoon for a second before sighing, placing it next to Jon's bowl as he begins to slowly eat his own.
It's deathly silent between the two of them. Besides the occasional gust of wind outside and the flicker of the candle, there is no noise. The tension is palpable. For a moment, Benget almost forgets that Jon is even there as Jon slowly takes the spoon, accepting defeat as he begins to eat his meal slowly.
"It's not the kidney pies that Old Nan makes."
"No. She made so many for the feast the other night that there wasn't enough for tonight's."
Benget takes another bite, chewing for a minute before swallowing, sighing a little.
"The boar doesn't taste bad. Wouldn't have been my first choice for a last supper in our home."
"Me neither."
Jon mutters, still not meeting his brother's eyes as Benget sighs, placing his spoon down on the table as he leans forward slightly.
"Talk to me, Jon. You and I both know this facade of being a miserable twat isn't you at all."
Jon stops eating for a few moments, shaking his head as he sighs.
"I..."
He hesitates for a moment, pausing as he finally meets his brother's piercing violet eyes that practically glow in the darkness of the room, the candle light flicking in his irises.
"It isn't right..what I did."
"And what did you do?"
"I forced your hand once again like I've done so many times when growing up. Those stable boys that attacked me when we were kids, you ended up breaking your nose protecting me. The thieves in Wintertown that cornered me and you got cut by one protecting me... And now I've forced your hand in signing your life away to do something you don't want to do."
Jon looks to his older twin, sadness and apologies and regret written clearly in his eyes as Benget stares for a long minute, not saying anything, which does not help Jon's nerves at all. But after another minute, Benget shrugs, looking away for a moment before meeting Jon's eyes once more.
"You're right. I don't want to do this. I should loath you for making this choice. I didn't choose to save you the many times I did growing up, though I'm glad that I did."
Benget reaches out, his hand touching Jon's and squeezing tightly and comfortingly.
"It's my responsibility to protect you, Jon. It's my responsibility as the older brother, even if it is only by ten minutes or so, to either protect you from dangers lurking outside in the winter winds or from within yourself. It's my job, and I'll be damned if I quite now after almost seventeen years of protecting your sorry ass."
Jon draws a sharp chuckle, squeezing his brother's hand back in appreciation, seeing the smile in Benget's eyes as he nods.
"Thank you.."
"Of course."
Benget stands from his seat, stretching just a little bit as he smiles down to Jon.
"It's going to be hard tomorrow. Get plenty of rest tonight, okay?"
"Alright."
"Oh, and finish your bowl."
He points to Jon's half empty bowl with a smile as he pats his brother's shoulder, turning around as Jon watches him walk back down the spiraling staircase of the Library Tower.
Exiting the tower, Benget sighs deeply, rubbing his bare hands together as he should've smacked Jon for forcing his hand and for also keeping his leather gloves from the other night. Benget walks back through the muddy courtyards, the torches lighting the walls along the keeps, stables and walls, making his way back to the Great Keep.
But a shadow catches his attention. His attention perks as the shadow quickly disappears behind some crates along the wall. For a moment, he thinks of possible danger. He had left his sword in his room and has no weapons on him to defend himself. Though, he knows he's not in any danger as Benget's attentive and alert eyesight catches sight of a pair of deep blue irises in the dark.
"You can come out, Bran. I'm not going to tell Father."
"It isn't Father I'm worried about."
Benget chuckles at that.
"Yeah, I fear that old hag too.."
He quietly mutters more to himself than to Bran as Benget just waves him over.
"Come on, I won't tell anyone."
Bran Stark peaks his head out from behind the crate, a worried look on his face from being caught red-handed.
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing?"
"Are you asking me or telling me?"
"I..."
Bran sighs a little.
"I was leaving the feast to go and climb."
"Climb what?"
"The Broken Tower. It's the tallest tower here in Winterfell and I want to try and grasp a star again."
Benget smiles to himself, memories of himself thinking he could do the same floods his mind. Those summer nights where he and Jon would climb up there together, talking about stupid things like swords, pretty girls and singing stupid songs whilst obviously drinking more than their father allowed.
Smiling brightly, Benget nods to Bran, ruffling his hair up a little bit.
"Go ahead. I didn't see you."
"Thank you, Ben!"
Bran replies cheerfully, quickly dashing in the direction of the Broken Tower as it outline is drawn in the night sky by the moonlight. Turning back around, Ben makes his way back inside the Great Keep of Winterfell, thinking how it will be the last night he sleeps there again for a long, long time.
꧁~~~~~~꧂
"Here you now, the sad little maid
Brave young Danny Flint,
Who's parents died of sickness
When she was not but ten....
And off young Danny went,
To live with her wicked uncle,
Who one night stole her maidenhead.
So into the North she fled...
Oh, Danny Flint, you'll never escape
The fate the gods have written...
And life must seem the cruelest jape.
Oh, brave young Danny Flint...."
His words were soft like a single drop of water onto a still pond, like a breath of wind he had strummed the strings to his lute, so much emotion packed behind such soft and methodical actions. The familiar words of the cruel and cold song flow from Benget's lips, his room drowning in its atmosphere, making him not even notice the door open.
Benget opens his eyes slowly, seeing Jeyne Poole lingering in the doorway for a few moments as his soft strumming of the cords comes to an end. She steps into the room, shutting the door behind her. And unlike the mistake he made the other day with not locking the door, Jeyne latches the lock onto the door.
Their clothes had been discarded quickly soon after, some words exchanged between the two as the temperature of the room had increased. But the feeling of sex had been dull to Ben for a long time. The longing of having a woman hold him in their arms like he was the only person in the world that matters had been a dream of his for so long.
Jeyne Poole had been no different than the other women before her.
The words of the Ballad of Danny Flint come back to his mind, the soft melody of the cords strumming softly come to his mind as she squeezes his curly locks, pulling tightly whilst moaning loudly.
What fate had the gods written for Benget, he wonders? What is there for him in this world? Would his story be one of a man condemned to roam the world with so much love in his heart to give but no one to take it, only for him to die a brutal death in some frozen wasteland in the far North?
What a cruel jape life really is.
꧁~~~A/N~~~꧂
Correct me if I am wrong but that was a very long chapter. 6735 words total aside from this author's note.
I really hope you all enjoy this chapter. Big stuff has happened if you haven't already caught onto that. Benget joining the Night's Watch, wah??? I haven't seen a lot of stories out there with the main plot being at the Wall with Jon and this story will obviously be just that if you haven't read the description to the book yet.
This book is an absolute thrill to write. Best and my favorite book I've written so far. But I wouldn't have been able to get this far with support from the likes of TheGrimmReader_ and so many others who leave their input in my comments, message board, and direct messages.
If you have any questions at all, or wish to leave feedback of any kind, feel free to do so!
Thank you all so much for reading!!!!!