"Ya! Ho Gi-Kyong-ssi, is this how you spend your days now? No wonder you don't have time to come and see us." There is laughter, but it doesn't come closer. Are those his friends? I understand now why he embraces me, it's to hide me and to avoid an introduction. The laughter fades in the distance, but only when there is no more sound than the leaves in the breeze, does Gi-Kyong lets me go.
Blood is racing through my veins, it's almost louder than the wind. My breathing is labored as if I've been running for my life and a bit embarrassed I turn my head away from his inquisitive gaze. Just to make sure I fully understand his actions, he explains: "They would have come over. They're good people, but might ... talk too much."
I swallow. "Won't they talk now anyway?"
He had to understand my meaning with only those words, because I couldn't bring myself to elaborate. His friends would talk for sure, they would want to know which girl was held in such an intimate embrace by their friend. I don't know much from Korean etiquette, but from the limited touching I've seen the family do and the overly polite way in addressing me and each other, I can deduce an embrace is a pretty big deal. There is no way this will be left alone.
Gi-Kyong's worried expression fades and he shrugs. Perhaps this is normal behavior for the young men here. A little cuddling with the farmers daughters every now and then? Has he done this before? My eyes widen, but he doesn't look at me. Instead he stares a while in the direction where his friends disappeared to and then, as if nothing happened, he continues to pull out weeds.
After a while my heart is recovered enough and I move away from him to do my own thing.
When he calls me for lunch, he seems to have forgotten the whole thing as he pours me water and hands me the usual bowl of rice that is somehow still warm. While we eat, he keeps adding pieces of fermented vegetables to my bowl that must have been inside the bag as well. After the third time, I can't help myself, I giggle.
The giggle turns into a laugh and soon I have to grab my stomach. Howling with laughter I try to hold on to my bowl of rice. Sensing there's not much hope there, he quickly takes it away from me. I roll to the side, tears running down my face.
When the fit has finally passed, I heave a very deep sigh. I don't even know why that just happened. The situation wasn't even that funny. Was it the tension? The situation we were in? The thought about what his friends must be thinking? Something like that, probably. I wipe my face on my sleeve, bite my lip when I look at Gi-Kyong and accept the bowl he cautiously hands back to me.
---
When we return in the evening, my concerns proof to be correct. As soon as we enter the house, Mr. Ho stands up and motions his son to follow him. Anxiously I stare at their backs until they disappear from sight. When I turn back, Mrs. Ho eyes me with suspicion. I immediately know what must have happened. Gi-Kyong's friends must have run into Mr. Ho in town and asked him about me. How would they have done it? With respect of course. Perhaps they offered congratulations on an upcoming celebration, thinking it was a bride they had seen in their friends arms. Mr. Ho would have asked what they meant and they would have described the scene.
Would Gi-Kyong be in trouble? I suck in my bottom lip and look over my shoulder. Perhaps I should tell his mother before she thinks the worst of me.
I kneel down, fold my hands in my lap and say: "Eomeonim, I'm sorry if I upset you, please let me explain what happened."
She nods and I continue: "We were working in the field, when suddenly some of your son's friends showed up. Gi-Kyong ..." I hold my breath when I see her eyes narrow, did I say something wrong? Wait, is it saying his name? I remember Koreans have this strict set of rules about talking to or mentioning someone. My experience is extremely limited, but I do recollect the word I'm supposed to use. Quickly I add: "-oppa ..." the frown doesn't disappear, didn't I use the correct honorific? What is it then? Nim? After a short deliberation, I settle for ssi and when the lines in her forehead finally smooth out, I relax a little before proceeding. "He hid me from them, I think it was to keep them from seeing me. He, ehm... he pressed me against him and his friends thought ... well, they must have thought we were being ... close. But I promise you, it was only to protect me. Please don't be mad at him. I'm sorry for causing so much trouble, please forgive me."
I bow as low as I can and wait for my penance. Mrs. Ho sighs, snorts and finally taps me on the head. "It's alright, Ji-Eun-ah, he was protecting you, I understand. It's too bad those boys had to see you two together. Rumors travel fast."
---
I stay in my seated position, my back a little more straightened after her pat, while she gets up to sort through the vegetables we brought back from the field. I rotate slightly so I can help her.
Worries make my face crease. People will ask questions, perhaps even come over. I should leave. But where can I go? Thinking about leaving this place, this family, makes tears well up and as soon as I blink, they run down my face. I try to hide it by pressing my cheek against my shoulder, but they keep coming.
When Mrs. Ho catches me wiping my eyes with my sleeve, she clicks her tongue, but hands me a small piece of while linen. I dab my eyes and sniff loudly and then I try to smile, but seeing her friendly expression only makes more tears flow.
"I'm sorry", I bawl, "I'm just really going to miss this place."
Through my impaired vision, I can see how her eyes widen. "Are you leaving, Ji-Eun-ah? But Gi-Kyong-ah told me you have nowhere to go."
It's true, and with more tears surfacing, I bend my head.
Sudden cheerful voices outside startle us. It's what we were afraid of, people coming over while I am in the house. I only hadn't expected them so soon, I haven't even thought about packing yet. Even though I really have nothing to pack.
Mr. Ho comes inside with an alarmed expression. He briefly glances at me, then says to his wife: "We will sit outside, it's getting dark, we can conceal her eyes."
What will they tell their friends? Will they keep up the ruse we started in the field? Will we tell them I'm the bride of their son? What will they say when I'll be gone? That I died? Or that the wedding was called off? Perhaps it's better if I stay hidden inside and they pretend Gi-Kyong was just messing around with some girl.
Mrs. Ho busies herself with preparing the iron pot to give food to her late guests and I already know they will never say something like that. This is an honorable family, Gi-Kyong is the last person on earth to disgrace a woman. I will not bring shame to his reputation.
Touching the scarf that hides my hair, I check if it's still in place. I haven't even washed yet after returning home. Why oh why couldn't these friends have waited a day?
While Mr. Ho goes outside again with a bottle and little drinking bowls on the circular tray-table, Gi-Kyong comes in and kneels before me. Astonished I watch him as he bows his head and I'm even more astounded when he says: "I am sorry, Yeong Ji-Eun-agassi, I have placed you in an awkward position. I beg of you to play along for now. I will fix this."
Words elude me, but when he looks up, I quickly nod and the tension leaves his shoulders. Before he gets up, however, I see his lips move in a pensive manner and he's almost embarrassed when he looks at me again and softly says: "I will have to call you Ji-Eun-ah, you can call me Gi-Kyong-ah." Again he bows his head and then he leaves the house.
For a moment I feel everything at the same time. Honorifics weren't a part of my life until last week, but I have learned they're a very big deal. Allowing myself to be called ah: the most informal suffix, by Gi-Kyong fills me at the same time with elated joy and terrible dread. I'm falling for him. I shouldn't, but I am. I groan, but quickly pull myself together. I check my feet, walk to the corner where a large bowl stands for cleaning and fill it with water from a jug next to it. I wash my face, my hands and finally my feet. Then I stand up, check my outfit, pull the head scarf as low as possible over my forehead and turn to Mrs. Ho.
She examines me meticulously, forces herself to smile and waves her hand to send me outside. To the men. I'm scared out of my wits.
The moment I appear in the door opening, eyes cast down without actually closing them, Gi-Kyong jumps up and takes my hand. A shiver runs through me and I swallow.
He allows me to take place next to him and his father and in the little space I can see around me, I can tell there are three people in front of me. Gi-Kyong introduces me and three young voices greet me enthusiastically. With great care not to look up, I bow my head and mumble a response.