He remembered the conversation clearly:
"I'm sorry."
He furrowed his eyebrows at his brother, "That...that's it? You're just sorry?"
"I...I'm not sure what else I can say, I—"
"You ruin my life for eight years and all you are is sorry?"
"At least he's trying," his sister interjected.
"No! Every single time we think you're going to be better, you're always awful to us again the next day! I'm not falling for this again!"
"Ev, come on—"
"I don't forgive you, Mike. Not until you stop being an arse for good! Just—leave me alone!"
Maybe he was too harsh. Evan flopped back against Childe's bed, burying his face into a pillow. Frustrated, he cried, because it seemed he had no idea what else to do.
"Evan!" his sister called, knocking on the bedroom door, "Childe made food! Do you want some?"
Wiping his face, he scrambled to his knees, "No, thank you!"
"Evan, kiddo, you haven't eaten a real meal in two days," Kaeya added, joining Elizabeth against the entrance, "You're coming out to eat whether you want to or not. Plus, you need to take a bath. You probably smell like death."
"Not true!" Evan pouted.
"It is," Elizabeth whispered to Kaeya, having to suffer the stench every night. He snorted, then turned back to the door.
"Listen, I'm gonna go draw you a bath. Either you come out now, eat, and get in, or you come out in five minutes, get in the bath, and then eat. But your food's gonna get cold if you do that."
Evan was silent for a moment, then he stuttered, "I-It's okay, I'll come out when the bath is done..."
Kaeya sighed, "Alright, but don't think you're gonna sneak your way out of missing dinner tonight."
The boy whined, which made him chuckle a little bit.
"Don't worry, you'll enjoy it. Now get ready, I expect you to be in the bathroom in five."
With that, Evan heard Kaeya's footsteps shuffle away from the door. He hugged his plushie tight to his chest, afraid that if he moved he might endanger himself. The clock next to him ticked loudly in his ear as he tried to take a soft step onto the wooden floor.
"I know, I'm going," he grumbled to it. The ticking softened afterward, as if Evan had said something to frighten the sound. After all, that's what his father and brother would've done, wasn't it?
Just as he got to the door, he turned around to face the clock again.
"I'm sorry."
Meanwhile, Elizabeth dangled her legs off of the side of the couch, hearing no ticking sound at all.
"Do you think dogs have feelings?"
"Why, of course," Childe replied nonchalantly, "They're basically the personified version of love and comradery."
From the door frame, Kaeya gazed at the bathroom floor as he added onto Childe's claim, "Their emotions surely aren't as complex as ours, but they do exist."
"Is that so, my friend?" the other man peaked out from around the kitchen wall.
"Dogs can't fall in love," he gave him a look, then walked into the bathroom, "Not like we can, anyway."
He shut the door and turned on the water, leaving Childe frozen in place. Of all the people in Teyvat, Kaeya had become the one that he knew best, and, as a result, Kaeya was the one who knew him the best, too. However, in all their closeness, Childe still hadn't figured out how to interpret his words. Kaeya always spoke in codes and deeper meanings. If that was true, though, that meant he just...
Elizabeth whipped her head around to him, "What was that?"
"I—I don't know," he put a hand over his mouth, then exhaled, "Let's just fix you dinner, alright?"
"Mr. Kaeya just told you he loves you!" she pointed, ignoring the man's words.
Childe put a plate in front of the chair she was leaning on, "Please leave it alone, Liz."
Huffing, Elizabeth folded her arms, "Aren't you going to go after him?"
"He's in the bathroom, not the Abyss," the man spoke sarcastically.
"Mr. Childe!"
"Elizabeth!" he scolded in the same tone as her, "Just—I don't want you involved in this, okay? It's not as simple as you think it is. Things are just...complicated...for him and I."
"I've seen way worse. Mum and Father hated each other!"
As childish as he knew it was, he folded his arms, "I wish it was that easy."
"Why isn't it?" Elizabeth threw her arms out in exasperation. Childe sighed; it was a fair question, after all. Even he didn't know why. All he could do was remember the exact words Kaeya said to him, and try to read between the lines as best he could.
"I really like you Childe, truly, I do. But I think, perhaps, now is not the best time to do this. I...I can't be with you right now. I'm sorry. Maybe in the future, but...I don't know. I think you should stay with Zhongli for a while, so things aren't, well, awkward..."
He said, as if the conversation hadn't been awkward in and of itself. Childe knew why Kaeya wanted him gone for those few months; he wanted him to get over whatever connection they may have had. But Childe never could. He opted for returning without letting go of his feelings, burying them deep inside where no one would ever find them. He guessed he didn't really do a good job, though. It was clear as day to Elizabeth, and probably to Kaeya, too—the man was incredibly perceptive. Scratch that, he knew it was clear to Kaeya. Maybe he was using that information as a game. Again.
Childe didn't know how long he'd been staring into space before Kaeya stepped out of the bathroom. They looked at each other with the same solemn expressions they had on that day, the day Kaeya left. They each knew what the other was thinking:
"I'm sorry."
"I know."
Kaeya inhaled a long, shaky breath, "I'll go get Evan."
"I love you," Childe wanted to blurt out, but he pursed his lips together instead.
Turning around, Kaeya bumped straight into the boy he was searching for. Cursing under his breath, he stumbled backwards and watched as Evan snuck past him.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, Mr. Kaeya," he put his free hand on the door, "Do you have any towels?"
"Already in the bathroom," Kaeya replied absentmindedly, not bothering to ask about the toy in the boy's hand. As Evan closed the bathroom door, he rushed forward down the hallway with crossed arms. Though he couldn't see him, he knew Childe would try to come after him; frankly, Kaeya wasn't ready to have the conversation he knew Childe wanted. For all the slack he gave Michael, he realized that they were very much alike. Neither of them were fond of vulnerability.
That's not to say Childe was, either. He stood next to Elizabeth, limbs tense. She edged him on with a light push.
"I know, I know. I'm going," he whispered to her with a sigh. He jogged over to Kaeya, catching his shoulder just before the man walked into his room.
"We should talk," Childe spoke softly.
Kaeya shot him a look, "Isn't dinner ready?"
"You don't seem to be going there, anyway," Childe retorted, and Kaeya rolled his eyes.
"Fine."
He continued into his room, Childe following close behind. It had been a while since Kaeya was in his safe space—at least, it would be his safe space if Childe wasn't boring holes into his back. He could feel the man's stare from a mile away. His friend, if he could call him that, sat on the bed with his feet propped up on the frame. The tension between them grew thick as Kaeya surveyed his room, seeing how it changed in the time Michael occupied it. Exasperated by the silence, he sneered.
"You had something to say, didn't you?"
"I did," Childe answered solemnly.
"Well, what is it?" Kaeya shot back, glancing at the plants he kept on top of his drawer. They were thin now, fragile from the days he neglected watering them. The sunset's light coming in from his tinted curtain made them look as if they were glowing blue.
"Did you...say you love me? Earlier?" Childe interrupted his serenity. The younger of the two men watched carefully as Kaeya caressed the leaves of his plant.
"Kaeya?"
He exhaled, "So what if I did?"
Looking at the man's back made him feel like he was talking to a brick wall, but still, Childe continued, "That's messed up, comrade."
"What?" Kaeya turned his head, glaring at him through sharp eyes.
"You know our history—"
"Yes, I know our history," he interjected.
"Then why would you say that?" Childe raised his voice, "Really, it is messed up! You know how I felt about you!"
"I know that, too!" Kaeya whipped his body around.
"Just let me talk!" he stood, "You were the one who pushed me away. You only let me come back because you thought I got over you—us. But I didn't! I never did. And I'm so tired of you treating this like it's a game! You're messing with my head, I don't wanna do this for you anymore! I can't be that person for you, the one you can just leave and come back to all the time! I can't!"
"I did not push you away!" the other man insisted.
Childe huffed out a laugh, "Oh, sure."
"You don't understand—"
"Then let me understand!" he stepped closer, "What is it? What's your excuse this time?"
Kaeya stepped closer as well, trying to intimidate Childe, but found that there were no words to come out of his mouth—not easy ones, anyway. He faltered, his eyes glancing between Childe's which were just the tiniest bit taller than his.
"Well?" the man urged.
He growled, "I was scared!"
"Oh, just stop with that—"
"I'm serious, Ajax!" he yelled, and the other man snapped his mouth closed. He straightened his back and bit his lip, waiting for Kaeya to continue.
"I was scared. Contrary to your belief, I do actually have human emotions," Kaeya shoved past his shoulder, turning to face Childe from the other side of the room.
Childe shook his head, "I—I just, I don't get it, I...why were you scared of me?"
"Well, first of all, I was not scared of you, okay? You're like a walking puppy dog," he leaned against the wall, folding his arms, "I was afraid of getting attached to someone...again. My father and Diluc had already instilled enough pain into my heart. You were just one more threat, one more person to leave me alone when I needed you."
"I was never planning to leave you," Childe declared quietly.
In a matter-of-fact way, Kaeya shrugged, "Everyone else has. I don't say it to sound pitiful, it's just the truth. It's my truth. By the time we had our little thing, I was already scared you'd gotten too close. I thought the best thing to do would be to end it before one of us hurt the other."
The ginger stared into his eyes, "Ending it was what hurt the most."
"I realize that now," he averted his gaze, "And...I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you. I wasn't able to realize it at the time, but it was a mistake. Call me sentimental, but having the kids force us to be vulnerable made it a little easier to recognize my wrongs, I suppose."
Nodding, Childe gazed at the floor. He kicked at the carpet, chuckling into the silence.
"What?" Kaeya blushed defensively.
"Nothing, just—" he smiled, "They're not the first people you've been vulnerable with, y'know."
"Hm?" the man raised an eyebrow.
"Klee, Razor, Bennett, Jean, Amber, Lisa...even Yanfei and Zhongli. You used to tell me about them all the time. I see how you care for them, especially the younger ones. You love them. They're family to you."
The red on his cheeks deepened, "Well, they're—they're pushy."
"I'm sure," Childe snickered, his tense muscles relaxing. Impulsively, Kaeya grinned at him.
"Hey, sparky, you missed someone on the list," he scoffed at Childe's confused glance, "You."
"Really?" he sassed with a smile, "I wouldn't count kicking me out for two months as you being vulnerable."
Kaeya rolled his eyes, "I don't mean that. I mean the other times. You're the one who knows me the best, after all. Even if we weren't in the situation we're in now, I would still love you either way."
Childe's eyes glowed, the corner of his mouth lifting just the tiniest bit. His cheeks dusted over with a light shade of pink, and Kaeya furrowed his eyebrows.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
"So you weren't lying when you said you loved me," he smiled, and Kaeya cursed under his breath, "I thought you might be messing with me again."
"Okay, listen, I didn't mean to—"
"Oh, come on, Mr. Alberich," he teased.
"It slipped out!"
Childe let out another laugh, "I'm just messing with you."
Smirking, Kaeya shook his head, "Really, I don't know how I never got over you of all people."
The man's smile grew even wider, and he rubbed his neck bashfully.
"So you mean that you still wanted me? All this time?"
"Just as you tried to get over me, I tried to get over you. It never worked," he shrugged.
"Thank the Archons for that," Childe stepped closer.
"You may thank me for that," Kaeya followed.
He exhaled with a grin, anxiously tapping his foot, "So, Mr. Alberich..."
"Yes, Ajax?" Kaeya smiled up at him.
"If you're willing to be vulnerable with me, then...do you, maybe, wanna try again? With us, I mean? I really think we might be able to do it this time."
Kaeya gazed into the bright orbs that were Childe's eyes. He remembered how they once seemed so bleak when he first met the man. They both had grown so much since then, and at the same time, there were some things that never changed at all. Kaeya was glad that Childe's eyes were one of the things that did change.
"I think I'd like that," he replied, and his lover's face broke out into a beaming, toothy grin.
The man lunged forward, capturing Kaeya's lips in his own. He caressed Kaeya's cheeks with his thumbs, then moved his arms down to Kaeya's shoulders where he could hold him tight. In return, Kaeya let out a throaty laugh as he wrapped his arms around Childe's waist.
"I love you," Childe spoke desperately, his hands moving back up to Kaeya's jawline, "I love you so much. I've loved you ever since I moved in with you all that time ago, I always loved you. I never stopped. Never, never, never."
"Would you quit talking into my mouth and just keep kissing me?" Kaeya smirked, "Your goofy smile makes your teeth hit mine."
"I'm sorry, gorgeous."
"Come on, Childe."
"It's true."
"Alright, alright, I get it..."
"Hehe. You know you love me."
"Of course I do."
The two men chuckled, both immersed in their newfound relationship. From the other side of the door, Elizabeth gasped, and Evan giggled.
"Ew, gross!" he whispered to his sister, both of their ears pressed to the wood.
"No, it's cute!" she looked down at him from where he was kneeling under her, "Hey, you're getting my shirt all wet with your hair!"
He let out another hushed giggle, "Sorry."
"I know you aren't really, you weirdo."
"Hey!"
Just then, Michael opened the apartment's front door. He stared at the empty kitchen with confusion, then glanced around the wall and into the hallway. There, he found his siblings staring at him like two deer in a headlight.
"What the fu—uh—what are you two doing?"
"Mikey, you will never believe what just happened!" Elizabeth shouted, and he blinked at her loud enthusiasm.
"Did I win the lottery?"
"No, Mr. Childe and Mr. Kaeya are—!"
The door flew open, interjecting her words as her and Evan were pushed backwards into the wall. Childe rushed to check on them on the other side of the door, but Kaeya, with his hand still on it, fumed.
"Okay, new house rule," he pointed at the two kids, "Quit snooping!"