A/N: Content warning for reference to someone who attempted suicide.
Burke family cabin, Catskills. Friday afternoon. March 5, 2004.
After the latest therapy session, Neal accompanied Noelle back to the cabin, where Peter and Elizabeth were putting on coats and boots. "We're finally going to build those snowmen," El said. "We have a few hours of daylight left."
"I think Henry's sledding," Peter added. "You wanna ask him to join us?"
Neal found his cousin at the hill where they'd gone sledding yesterday. But this wasn't the fun, laughter-filled version of the sport Henry had introduced him to. He was clearly going for speed, with an uncharacteristic recklessness as he raced down the hill. Somewhat to Neal's surprise, it occurred to him that he might need Peter's help to deal with whatever demons were driving Henry. But for now it would be easier to identify those demons if they were alone.
He waited at the top of the hill for Henry to return. His cousin was panting a bit when he reached the top and saw Neal. Henry positioned the sled beside him and sat down.
Neal studied Henry's face and said, "It's not helping."
Henry pulled off his cap, leaving his hair a mess. "What isn't helping?"
"Barreling down the hill. You're still stressed."
"You should have seen me before." Henry pulled off his gloves, made an attempt to smooth out his hair, and put the gloves back on again.
"Is it Win-Win?" Neal asked, aware that he'd brushed off Henry's concerns about being fired. He should have kept asking questions when Henry gave him that opening.
"I keep thinking about this Mr. Hyde, how someone inside the company could do something like that and not get caught. It makes me wonder about some stuff that happened before, like around the time my parents got divorced. If I'm right, there are some big issues in the company. Getting everything cleaned up and staying clean, that's a massive job. If I commit to it, I might never escape. It could take over my life."
"If you don't want to do it, just tell them," Neal said.
"It's not that I don't want to do it, exactly. It's just that I thought I'd have the chance to do other stuff, first. Plus I'm dreading some of the issues I'll uncover. I probably know the people involved. A lot of the company employees are Winstons or Winslows I've known all my life. It's gonna get personal. Sometimes I wonder if I'm up to the job."
"Would they really make you responsible for cleaning everything up? I thought you had a few years before the board wanted you to take over."
"Yeah, but people are starting to get wind of the fact that I'm supposed to be the next CEO. No matter who's officially in charge, those people will think of me as the future boss. They'll try to please me, try to make sure whatever changes they suggest are ones I'll support. That means I need to keep up with all the changes and make sure I'm supporting the right ones. When am I going to go after Masterson? It'll keep getting delayed. Meanwhile he's out there making money hand over fist while friends of ours see their dreams crumble. And... You met Randy Weston?"
"Yeah, I went to his music shop like you suggested. It's amazing."
"I met his daughter a couple of years ago. Not long after you first left for Europe. Incredible voice, amazing talent, and... And she... She got her hopes crushed in one of Masterson's shadier deals. Couldn't find any way out of it. She tried to kill herself. Lives are at stake, and I'm supposed to play junior CEO?"
"Then don't."
"Right. Win-Win is a family legacy. Hundreds of people depend on it for their livelihood. I'm supposed to tell them I'm too busy for them?"
Neal sat beside Henry on the sled. They were way outside his area of expertise. He wished Graham were here. As much as the man wanted his grandson to take over the company, Neal didn't believe he wanted to make Henry miserable in order to accomplish it. "All that on top of me being drugged and hospitalized, huh?"
Henry briefly leaned against Neal, more of a quick shoulder bump. "Thank God you're okay. That really was more than I could handle at any time, regardless of the rest."
"That's over now. I'm back on my feet again, so why not lean on me for a change?"
Henry shook his head. "It's too soon. You're still not out of the woods."
Neal gestured to the trees around them. "We're both in the woods, in more ways than one. Listen, I don't know the first thing about how a company like Win-Win works, and I can't say I want to know. What I do want is to be there for you. Tell me what to do, and I'll do it."
Henry laughed. "You're going to start following orders all of the sudden?"
"I'm serious. The last week or so, everyone's been coming to my rescue and been on my case about how I should ask for help. How about you get over the big brother thing and admit you could use some help, too?"
"I guess you could..." Henry paused as Satchmo bounded up to them. "Hey, boy." He rubbed the dog's ears.
"Thought you two might have gotten lost," Peter said, reaching them a moment after Satchmo. "Everything okay?"
Henry stood up. "Sure. We're good, aren't we, Neal?"
Neal took Henry's hand and stood up. "Getting there. Sorry about that, Peter. I lost track of the time." Then he grabbed Henry's cap, balled it up and yelled, "Fetch, Satchmo!" as he threw the cap back toward the cabin. Satchmo ran after it, with Henry a step behind.
Neal remained beside the sled, silent.
Peter started pulling the sled toward the storage shed. "Anything you want to talk about?"
Neal followed, and hoping he was doing the right thing said, "For a long time, Henry was my hero, you know? He came to my rescue, never let me down, always seemed to know what he was doing. As time went on, he took on more and more. Partly to impress me, partly because... I think it's his rush, you know? For me it was the cons and heists. For him it's playing the hero. Or at least undermining the bad guys."
Peter opened the doors of the shed. "You still think he knows what he's doing?"
After Peter had the sled in place, Neal helped push the doors closed. "With a big job, like a museum heist, you do a lot of planning. You consider all the details and possibilities and have back-up plans. But in the end you have to go with instinct. I rely on my instincts to get through tough situations, and Henry even more so. He's dealing with people now who have such intricate plans that the best way to throw them off is to go in with all the information but also with what appears to be no plan at all. At least, not a conscious plan. He's a chess player when he needs to be, but he's a genius at working on the fly and pulling all the elements together at the last minute. But that makes it hard to help him. And it could be that he's reached a limit of how much his instincts can take in and react to and still stay above water. I'm not sure he's going to recognize that he's in too deep until it's too late."
"Tell me he's not going to pull you into whatever this is." When Neal didn't answer, Peter stopped on the path up to the cabin and put a restraining hand on his nearest shoulder. "Neal?"
"You know he wants me to work at Win-Win someday."
"And is that all you're talking about? Neal, you gotta give me more to go on. You wouldn't have started telling me about this unless you wanted me to do something about it. Tell me what to expect."
"I don't know enough yet. It could be days or months before it all becomes clear. Or maybe I'm overreacting. Just... Just be prepared."
"And when whatever you're trying not to tell me about happens, you'll ask for help?"
It still didn't quite feel natural. Neal wondered if it would ever be easy to admit he couldn't handle things on his own. He supposed he had a lot in common with Henry in that regard. But he acquiesced and said, "Yeah, to keep Henry out of trouble, I'll ask for help. He isn't going to like it, though."
"We'll deal with that when the time comes."
###
Saturday morning they packed up. The weather was great, the roads were clear, and Neal was in a much better emotional state, at least as far as Peter could tell. The plan was that they'd stop for lunch in a nearby town, and reach the city by late afternoon.
Henry was carrying his guitar to the SUV when Elizabeth said, "What was that song you played the other night?"
He smiled smoothly. "It was 'Nothing Else Matters.' Classic Metallica."
"No, the other song. I'd never heard it before."
Henry stiffened slightly. Peter might not have paid any attention, but Neal paused and gave his cousin a sharp glance. "El's a big music fan," Neal said. It almost sounded like a warning.
"It was 'Fix You' by Coldplay. I don't think it's been released in the U.S. yet. They're a British band, you know." Henry nodded as Neal held the cabin door open for him. Neal followed with the easel and art supplies. Elizabeth remained in the cabin, making sure they had left the kitchen in perfect shape.
Peter picked up a suitcase and stepped outside as quietly as he could. He heard Neal's hushed but angry voice. "...2005! What were you thinking?"
Henry's voice was indistinct at first, but ended with, "...leaked on the internet more and more these days. It's no big deal." Then Henry looked up to see Peter. "You need any help with that?"
"No, it's lighter than it looks." Peter placed the suitcase in the vehicle. "How about you? You got everything?"
Henry nodded. "That was the last of it. We're done."
"Let's round up El, Noelle and Satchmo and get on our way." Peter closed the hatch. And as he walked back to the cabin, he made a mental note to look up that song to find out why the cousins were arguing about it.
###
After driving twenty minutes south, they reached the outskirts of a small town and cell phone coverage returned. All of their phones started beeping and vibrating with notices of missed calls and messages. And as everyone else reached for their devices, El said, "Not yet. Burke family tradition. This remains a cell-phone-free vacation until after lunch. We're about a block away from an adorable restaurant that shouldn't be ruined by staring at our phones to scroll through messages."
Peter helped enforce the "family tradition" El had invented on the spot. Even though he was eager to check his own messages, he did understand her desire to extend the family focus a little longer. He took all of their phones and locked them in the back of the SUV. Then they had sandwiches at the soda-shop themed café. Only after they ate did he return the phones, sending each person in a different direction in the parking lot for a little privacy as they checked messages.
Agent Tricia Wiese had texted some updates, but there hadn't been much progress until Friday. Then she simply sent: "Call Hughes" and listed the man's personal cell phone number.
There were voice mails from Reese Hughes and Graham Winslow. After speaking with both men, Peter turned his attention to Henry. For a moment he feared Henry had run, but then he saw the young man had simply moved to lean against a nearby car. He looked dazed. Noelle and Neal were already approaching him, but Peter broke into a run. "I need you to give us some space," Peter ordered. "If you want to help him, don't get in the way. I can clear most of this up in a few minutes if you give us some privacy. Trust me."
"No more than ten minutes, and I'll be watching," Noelle said, before walking toward the SUV.
Neal said, "Henry?" And after his cousin nodded, Neal followed Noelle.
"There are some benches, just a few yards over. In the summer most people want to eat outside, because the restaurant isn't air-conditioned. Think you can join me?" Peter kept his voice as calm as he could. He waited for Henry to make the first move, and when they were seated at the nearest bench, Peter simply said, "I talked to Graham," and left it at that. Even though Noelle had given a time limit, he knew it was best not to rush into this.
"I would never..." Henry started, but he couldn't go on.
"Take your time." He needed to get this in Henry's words.
"Pops said they suddenly found evidence... That the purchases of Flashback... That it points to me. It all looks like... Like I was part of Highbury's blackmail scheme, like I gave the order for the overdose..." He paused, almost gasping for breath. "But I don't see how... I had nothing to do with... Peter, I'm not the most law-abiding person on Earth, but we're talking about Neal. Someone tried to kill Neal, and I could never... To think someone would make it look like I would... God, Peter, if anything happened to him I couldn't..." He looked up at Peter, his eyes filled with tears, but anger and determination on his face. "No! They aren't going to get away with hurting Neal. I will find out who did this."
"Okay, deep breath. Let's back up a step. I need you to answer a few questions. First, did you ever have the drug Flashback in your possession?"
"No."
Peter nodded. "Did you ever provide or arrange to provide Flashback to anyone else?"
"No."
"Before you and Graham came to New York for the Enscombe op, were you aware that employees of Highbury were drugging their clients?"
"No."
Peter took a moment on how to phrase the last question. "Did you ever suggest to anyone that Flashback or a drug like Flashback should be used to retrieve Neal's repressed memories?"
"No!" Henry shot off the bench and started to pace. "Just the opposite. I tried to talk him out of that part of the op, volunteered to go in his place. You were there, Peter!"
"I know, I know. For what it's worth, Graham and I both agree it's a frame. In some ways, it's actually good news. It means the person who did this is getting desperate. Graham thinks by Monday they can identify who planted the evidence that suddenly and conveniently appeared in the Win-Win logs." Peter stood and placed a hand on Henry's shoulder, putting an end to the frantic pacing. "But in the meantime, I have to take this seriously. We need to go to the Bureau and have you answer these questions again, and probably some more. You're not under arrest, but we need to treat you seriously as a suspect so we can officially clear you. And one more question. Graham said you didn't spend the night before the op at his hotel suite. Where were you, and can you provide witnesses who can give you an alibi?"
Henry gave a shaky laugh. "I went to the Executive Decision and spent the night on the boat. And remember the whole twin-speak thing? I'll give you one guess who also decided to spend the night there."
Peter could finally smile. "Of course he's your alibi against allegations that you tried to kill him. Let me confirm that, and then I'll send Neal and Noelle over."
"Peter?"
Peter was already a couple of steps away, but the question stopped him in his tracks. It sounded so forlorn. He turned around.
"Pops wouldn't say who he thought planted the evidence against me."
Wanting to tread carefully, Peter said, "Theoretically it could be anyone with access to the Win-Win systems where the data was uncovered."
"But it's probably my dad."
Peter nodded, and Henry's expression was heartbreaking. Peter stepped forward and hugged the young man before he even thought about it. "We're going to fix this. Wait here." On the walk back to the SUV, Peter reconsidered some of his assumptions about the day Neal ran away. It hadn't really made sense to Peter that Neal was surprised to learn his father was a dirty cop. No family photos, no clippings of articles about his heroism, no visits to the widow and child from the local PD, no inclusion in memorials, no gravestone to visit. All of that put together practically screamed that James wasn't dead and wasn't a hero. How could it have come as such a shock to a bright kid like Neal?
He'd seen the answer in Henry. That desperate hope against hope that his father was good and loved him. It took a lot to kill that, and Peter had just watched it die.
Noelle met him part way, "What is it?"
Peter shook his head, unable to put words to the tragedy of it all. "He needs you," Peter said, and then she was rushing toward Henry.
"Peter?" Neal sounded uncertain. Sometimes he sounded so much like Henry.
"Where did you spend the night before the Enscombe op?" Peter realized his voice sounded hoarse.
"On Graham's boat."
"Was anyone with you?"
"Yeah, Henry was there. Why -" Neal's question was lost as Peter hugged him, too. "What's that about?"
"You need to talk to Henry, but first I just want to tell you... You aren't like your fathers. Neither of you are."
Looking confused but anxious to talk to Henry, Neal said, "Yeah. I'm guessing we should talk about that again after I know what Robert's done." Then he ran over to where Noelle sat on the bench with Henry.
El had been staying out of the way, but now she came forward and squeezed Peter's hand. "I love you," she said.
"You didn't even hear what happened."
"Not with my ears, but I listened with my heart." She looked up with a watery smile. "And my eyes picked up a lot, too. Neal was right to pick you as his father figure. They both need you today."
As if to underscore that point, while Henry was climbing into the SUV Neal thanked Peter, who patted him on the back and once again promised, "We'll fix this."
"I know we will. I trust you, Peter. We both do."
A/N: The album featuring the song "Fix You" by Coldplay wasn't released in the U.S. until 2005; that's why Neal was concerned that Henry sang the song in 2004. Caffrey Disclosure will explain how Henry knew the song.