New York hotel room. Tuesday night. February 24, 2004.
Graham Winslow was the early to bed, early to rise sort. He turned in at 10pm on the dot. And Henry wasn't entirely surprised to receive a text from his mother at 10:05. Neal had warned him that Noelle Winslow had stayed in New York, and that after the funeral she had mentioned an intention to have "a talk" with her son. Neal had described her tone as ominous.
Henry texted back to let her know that she could safely avoid her ex-father-in-law. She must have been in the hotel lobby, because minutes later she knocked on the door to the suite.
Instead of hugging Henry the moment he opened the door, she studied him carefully first. "Looking for something?" Henry asked as she finally embraced him.
"You," she said, and then let him go.
"Well you found me. And Pops is upstairs in his room, so you're safe from the inquisition about why you don't want to come back to work for Win-Win. Can I get you a drink?" Henry asked as he led the way to the living area.
"Water will be fine." Noelle stepped out of her shoes and then sank into an overstuffed sofa.
Henry brought her a glass of water and then lounged on the sofa beside her. "Shouldn't you be in Baltimore, inspiring graduate students?"
"I had a PhD candidate handle my classes today. Tomorrow I'll take the red-eye back home. But I needed to talk to you, first."
"You could have just called," Henry said, pretending he didn't see the fierceness in her expression. He was in trouble, and being defensive would only make it worse. The best approach was to remain calm while learning what the issue was, buying time to think up an explanation that would placate her. The fact that she knew exactly what he was doing only made the game more intricate.
"And you could have been too busy to call back."
"You know what Win-Win is like," Henry countered.
"Mmm. Yes, we'll get back to that. But first we're going to talk about Neal."
Henry suppressed a smile, giving his mother an earnest expression. "I'm honored that you're willing to discuss his case with me. How did the session go?"
Annoyance flashed across her face. "You know very well I'm not going to divulge what any of my patients tell me in confidence."
"I know very well that psychologists discuss cases with each other all the time for additional insights and suggestions."
"Not when the patient is someone known to you. Very well known to you, apparently. When you referred Neal to me, you left out some pertinent information. Why on earth didn't you tell me he assisted with your master's degree? You know I would have approached the first session differently if I'd realized he had studied psychology."
"He told you that?" Henry didn't bother hiding his shock.
"No, Agent Peter Burke told me. Which brings me to something else you might have mentioned. Peter has quite the hold on Neal, doesn't he?"
"What do you mean?" Henry asked.
"When he saw Neal doing something he disapproved of on Sunday, and Neal refused to stop, all Peter had to do was call Neal son and Neal immediately obeyed."
That revelation propelled Henry to his feet. "He's using that to manipulate Neal? That isn't how it was supposed to work. I just wanted..." He trailed off, noticing Noelle's satisfied expression. "Okay, you got me. Yes, I knew that Neal thinks of Peter as a father figure. In fact, I encouraged it."
"Why do you feel guilty about their relationship?"
Henry ran his hands through his hair, and then paced in front of the sofa as he talked. "When I came to New York in January, I realized that Neal's nightmares and flashbacks were getting worse. It seemed to be caused by finding a father figure he finally trusted, someone who broke through Neal's defenses. I knew if Peter acknowledged Neal as a son, it would give Neal new defenses for a while. But it places Peter inside those defenses, in a position to take advantage of Neal." He looked up at Noelle, aware that the pleading in his voice was likely echoed in his face, "I never believed he would do it. I'd never have given Peter that key if I thought he'd use it that way. I should have checked in on Neal more often, come back up here again to see things for myself instead of believing him when he said everything was fine. I..." He paused, realizing Noelle was repeating his name.
"Henry, enough!" Noelle stood, put her hands on her son's shoulders, and pushed. "Sit down and calm down." She refilled her glass of water and then returned to sit beside Henry. "It's never easy with you. You're too smart for your own good. Half the time I don't know whether to berate you or congratulate you, and tonight is no exception."
Henry treated her to an honest grin. "Let's start with the congratulations."
"Very well." Noelle tucked her feet under her, turning on the sofa to face Henry. "It would seem you helped Peter and Neal acknowledge a very powerful bond. What I witnessed on Sunday wasn't something I'd categorize as manipulation. Peter appeared deeply worried, unsure about whether calling Neal son would work, and relieved when it did. I'd describe it as something rare and beautiful."
"That's an aunt speaking, not a therapist. Beautiful, really," Henry teased.
"I'm allowed to be an aunt occasionally. No." She shook her head before Henry could respond. "You don't have to say it. Neal needs a professional therapist more than he needs an aunt right now. I underestimated how quickly he'd make his way into my heart, but for now I can and will continue to keep those roles separate. As an aunt, I thought it was beautiful. As a therapist, I see it as ephemeral."
"You think Peter's going to change his mind about Neal?"
Noelle sighed. "I think that Neal is making up for missed opportunities. When he's dealt with his childhood issues, he'll want a different kind of relationship with his father figure."
"Hopefully not what I have with Robert."
"No, your relationship with your father is never going to be what it should be, and that's something else we need to discuss. But think about what you have with Graham. You'll always be a beloved grandchild in his eyes, but he also treats you as an equal, as a business partner in Win-Win. Even as you acknowledge Graham has more experience and you try to learn from him, you relish the respect he gives you. That's where Neal's relationship with Peter should move, ideally – to the mutual respect and affection of adult peers where it is acknowledged that one is the more senior."
Henry put his feet up on the coffee table. "That sounds boring and clinical, but I get it. And now's when you berate me?"
"Not yet. First I have to tell you how pleased I am to see how much you care about Neal. After I filed for the divorce, you became so distant and self-contained. I started to worry you'd never open yourself up to that kind of friendship."
"I'd describe the Neal the same way when I found him in Chicago. Determined to take care of himself and not to make any connections that could hurt him. But he couldn't help trusting me. It was almost instinctive. It surprised us both."
"He may have remembered you, at some level. When the Marshals took him away, you tried to protect him. You were screaming at them to bring him back. That would have been a powerful memory – of the last person who tried to save him before he was uprooted and eventually abused. I'm happy for both of you that you have this friendship." She paused.
"But?" Henry said. "I can hear the disapproval looming. What's wrong with long-lost cousins being like brothers now?"
"Nothing, I hope. My concern is that you hid it. You led everyone to believe that you found Neal, got him medical care, and then let him go on his way. I don't understand why you felt the need to mislead your family for years."
Henry leaned back into the sofa, staring up at the ceiling as he recalled the events of seven years ago. "I let him go his own way. And he made the choice to stick with me."
"I'm sure you made it an alluring choice, compared to the other options."
"Yeah, he picked the choice I thought was best for him. As far as the secrecy goes, there were several factors. First, he had been in WITSEC. It didn't seem wise to advertise where he was and what he was doing. The danger didn't go away because he left home. Second, I thought I'd get constant pressure to send him back to his mom." He looked at Noelle. "Especially from you."
"And what would be the harm in reuniting Neal with Meredith?" She sounded exasperated.
"Under the influence of the fever he was running and the drugs they gave him at the hospital in Chicago, he said some scary things... Most of it I could tie back to what I'd read about his abuse. But not all of it. I was honest with him about what I knew of the abuse, about how as a kid visiting Win-Win I'd found the police report and hospital records. He asked me not to tell him the parts he didn't remember, and I abided by his wishes. When I asked him about the things he'd said that confused me, he refused to answer. I couldn't take the risk of sending him back to a situation where he might still be in danger. Not even to please you."
Noelle remained silent a moment as she considered what Henry had told her. "How long did he stay with you?"
"About four years. We essentially parted ways when he turned twenty-two, but we've always stayed in touch."
"You've never told me what you did during that time."
"Got a master's degree, obviously."
"And obviously you did more than that. Henry, can't you be serious about this for once? I was worried about you, for years. Where were you? How did you survive?"
Usually Henry managed to avoid this conversation, or to hold it over the phone where he didn't have to look at her. Seeing her concern almost broke his resolve. "Mom, you really don't want –"
"Don't tell me what I do or don't want to know," Noelle interrupted. "You're my son. And in my profession I know all too well about the bad things that can happen to people. I want to know that you weren't hurt. Or if you were, I want to help."
Hearing the edge of tears in his mother's voice, Henry reached over to hug her. "I wish I could tell you it was all a fun adventure. Sometimes that was an accurate description, and for Neal's sake especially I tried to think of it that way. But the truth is, it started because I had encountered some bad things. Evil, you might say. That's why I left college and stayed on the move for a few years. At first I hid from it, and I taught Neal how to hide. But in the end I had to fight it. I'll admit I made my share of mistakes along the way, but I did my part to right a few wrongs. And that's all I can tell you. For everyone's safety I did that fighting in the dark, and you have to let it stay in the dark."
Noelle let her head rest on his shoulder. "Because you're still fighting the evil?"
"Now who's too smart? Yeah, there's still a fight going on, but there's someone I need to convince that I've gone away and given up. You could undo everything I've almost achieved if you go poking around now. And I can't afford to be distracted by you getting swept into it."
She lifted her head to look at Henry again. "Tell me you aren't doing this alone."
"No. Neal's in it, too. He won't let me leave him out." Henry sat up straight and grinned at her. "What was Neal doing that had Peter so worried? That must have been something good. I'm sorry I missed it."
Noelle gave him a look that told him she knew he was deliberately changing the subject, and that she was granting him a temporary reprieve. "Neal was impersonating you."
"What's scary about that?"
"He was too good at it. At one point I even called him by your name."
Henry whistled. "Impressive."
"When Peter said Neal helped with your master's... did that help include attending your classes?"
"There might have been a few occasions. But I always... well, I almost always took the exams. There was one midterm when I had the flu and Neal filled in."
"That's how you finished the degree so quickly. You essentially took two years of course work in one. Really, Henry, how could you?"
"What's the big deal? We both got a great education, two of us on a single scholarship. And you're hardly in a position to throw stones. How many times have I heard stories about you going to chemistry classes for Aunt Meredith while she went to French for you? From the sound of things, you spent half of your high school years confusing people by impersonating each other. Why is it okay for twins, but not for the sons of twins?"
"Hmm." Noelle squinted at him as she thought, then treated him to a grin that mirrored his own. "Let me get back to you on that. I'm sure there's an explanation that doesn't make me sound like a hypocrite."
"I won't hold my breath." Henry crossed his arms and tried to look severe. "You kept alluding to something we need to discuss about Win-Win and Dad. What is it?"
"At the last Win-Win board meeting it came to my attention... That does sound stuffy, doesn't it? Let's try it this way: are you aware of Graham's plans for you?"
"That he wants me to take over Win-Win eventually? He mentioned it my first day at the company, more than a year ago. I wasn't thrilled about it, and I haven't agreed to it. But I'm not going to stress about something that won't happen till I'm probably in my fifties. Who knows what will happen between now and then?"
"I was afraid of this. Henry, he doesn't intend for you to take over in your fifties. He wants to wait until you're thirty, but it's straining his patience to hold out that long."
For a moment Henry stared at Noelle, unable to speak. "You... He can't..." He shook his head and tried again. "But what about..."
"Graham intends to skip a generation. His daughter and two of his sons are fine with that, but Robert isn't."
"Well, yeah," said Henry, giving up on eloquence. "Dad lives for Winston-Winslow. He's spent his adult life trying to prove to Pops that Win-Win is his first priority. It's the reason..." He looked at his mother and stopped.
"It's the reason he married me, to recruit me into the company and to have a child with the combination of his skills and mine. It's the reason he taught you everything he knew about investigations before you even started high school, and the reason he did... well, whatever he did to convince you to work for Win-Win after you'd always said you'd never join them."
"Blackmail," said Henry, tamping back anger to think through the situation. He glanced at Noelle and said, "I'll tell you about it later. Dad's whole world has been about doing a good job, being recognized, and pleasing Pops. Why isn't he getting a shot at running the company?"
"Because Win-Win needs more than a hard worker in charge. They need someone with creativity, with vision. Those aren't Robert's strong suits. But they are yours."
Henry blinked. "I'm surprised he doesn't hate me." When Noelle didn't respond he continued, "He does hate me?"
Noelle laid a hand over his. "Knowing him as I do, I have to say he's moving in that direction. Robert's always had a black-and-white view of the world. He knows what's right and he does it, not because he's a good person but because that's what's expected of a leader at Win-Win. If anything were to make Robert cross the line, this would be it. Sometimes I think he acted the role of a protective father to please his own father, not because he had actual paternal instincts. If he has to choose between you and the company... Sweetheart, be careful. He's in a position to make your job, and your life, extremely difficult. Graham must realize that Robert's upset, but I don't think he grasps how ruthless Robert can be. I'm afraid Graham won't step in to protect you until it's too late."