C H A P T E R T W E N T Y - S E V E N
Breathless
caught inside:
when you are caught between the shoreline and the breaking zone of a wave.
Breakfast with Dawson was a thousand times better than the encounter I had with my parents earlier in the morning.
It allowed me to almost escape reality for a while. To just focus on him and I, as oppose to the thoughts about my parents as well as the upcoming tournament.
Currently we were on the way back to my house. The ride has been filled with small talk and singing outbursts as I have been trying to distract myself from what is to come.
"Dad" I shouted at him as he threw a duffel bag down the stairs. "Stop Dad! You can't leave" I plea while standing in my parents bedroom.
Clothes were flying from the closet and the drawers onto the floor as I stood there in shock. My dad was swearing, yelling at me to leave him alone.
I knew the reason why he wanted me to leave, it was because he didn't want me to see him cry. He was on the verge of a breakdown and was scared it was going to trigger one of my own.
"Ainsley please" he screams at me causing my body to wrack with shakes. "Don't make this any harder than it has to be".
His voice cracks as he barely manages to complete that sentence. "I love you pumpkin, I'm still going to be here for you even if I am not physically here".
He drops the clothes in his hand as he crosses the room and wraps me in his arms in an attempt to control my shaking.
"Dad" I whimper as my tears soak his black tee shirt. "Please don't go".
"Ainsley I have to. I made mistakes and I have to deal with the consequences. This has to happen and it has to happen now, it's for the better".
"But what about mom? She won't even get to say goodbye" I sob as he releases me and takes a step back, tears pooling in the corners of his eyes as he quickly turns away from me.
"That's why it has to be now. It would break my heart even more to have her watch me walk away" he zips up the last of his suitcases and walks towards me again pressing a kiss against my forehead and ruffling my hair as he always did before stepping into the hallway. "I love you".
He looks over me one last time before grabbing his suitcases and walking down the stairs. I stood frozen in place, tears blurring my vision as I watched the shadow of my father walk away.
The slamming of the door snapped me out of my trance as I ran to my bedroom and threw open my blinds as I watched my father pack his bags into his old yellow Ford pickup truck.
I watched as he jumped into the front seat, the sputtering sound of the engine echoing through the house before he backed down the driveway.
He stopped for a moment, his eyes meeting mine as he gave a wave before disappearing down the road and out of my life.
"Ains" I hear as I snap out of my thoughts and readjust to my surroundings as I notice we're parked a few houses down from my own. "You zoned out on me there for a moment".
"Sorry" I sheepishly respond. "I've been doing that a lot lately".
"You have a lot going on, it's understandable" Dawson says giving my thigh that his hand was resting on a gentle squeeze. "Are you ready to head home?"
I nod as I instantly feel my heart rate increase as he places the car in drive before inching towards my house.
"How come I have never seen a truck like that at your place before?" Dawson asks as he points at a yellow pickup truck that sat crooked on the end of my driveway.
The Ford pickup truck wasn't the same one from years ago. The model changed to something more modern but he would never get rid of that horrid colour.
Swallowing, my mouth felt like sandpaper as I couldn't find myself being able to form a sentence. Instead I just muttered out "It's my dads".
Upon hearing that Dawson swerved his truck into the nearest driveway blocking my view from the house as I was completely fixated on whatever was in front of me.
I couldn't believe it. I had no clue what was going on except for the fact that my parents were up to something behind my back and the thought of that made me sick.
"You're not going home" Dawson said, anger clearly evident in his voice as he sped back off in the direction we came a few moments earlier.
Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes as I dug my fingernails into the soft flesh of my hand in an attempt to control myself. I didn't want Dawson to see me have a complete and utter breakdown.
"Fuck I'm sorry Ains" he says grasping my hand as his other clenched the wheel so hard that his knuckles were turning white.
Blood was pounding in my ears to the sound of my rapid heart rate. My legs were shaking as a knot formed in my chest cutting off my oxygen as my vision blurred.
How could they do this to me? How could my mother invite him back into our house after everything he caused? All the pain, heartbreak, days spent staring out the window in hopes he'd return, just forgiven and forgotten to her.
"I can't... I can't breathe" I inhaled quickly, grabbing at my chest with the hand that wasn't holding his.
I felt the truck lurch to a stop as Dawson grabbed my shoulders and forced me to look at him. He was saying something, something that I couldn't make out as my heart rate consumed my senses.
I sucked in another breath, followed by another. The air felt as though it was without oxygen as no matter how much I gasped I couldn't seem to catch my breath.
"Breathe Ainsley, Just breathe" I finally manage to make out as Dawson stared at me, concern evident in his face as he still had a hold of my hand. "Breathe in" he says as I gasp. "Breathe out" I exhale. "In... Out".
I focus in on his voice, following his commands as my breathing becomes less reckless. Gently his hand reached up and cups my cheek, his finger brushing against my soft skin as he doesn't take his eyes off me.
"You're okay. I'm here with you" he says handing me his water bottle from the centre console as I take a sip. I never realized I was thirsty, but the cool water soothed my tightened throat.
"I'm okay" I mumble quietly. "I'm okay".
I never realized it but we were now parked in the driveway of Dawsons house, I was too focused on everything that just happened to pay attention to what roads he was taking.
He opens the door as a breeze rushes into the truck, the cool wind raising goosebumps on my skin which felt calming. In a moment he was on my side, standing in front of me as he opened the door and helped me out of the truck.
Instead of moving he wrapped me in his arms. His chin resting against the top of my head as he just held me tight.
My once racing heart rate was now calm, instead beating in sync with the man who I feel so strongly for. His hand finds it's way to my hair, tangling in it slightly as he leans back for a moment, our eyes meeting as I find myself getting lost in his ocean blue eyes.
He looked as though he was going to say something to me, but instead he leans forward and presses his lips against mine in a searing kiss.
I let the emotions I have held onto for the last few days come out. Grasping onto his shirt I pulled him closer to me, deepening the kiss.
He took a step forward causing me to be pushed up against the side of his truck which elicited a gasp. He took advantage of that, his tongue slipping into my mouth mingling with mine.
After a moment he pulls away giving us both the chance to come up for air as he peppers kisses down my neck, pausing at my collarbone where he bites down leaving his mark on me.
"Dawson" I say, my voice laced with a sultry tone as his eyes meet mine again, seconds before his lips.
His hands go the the back oh my thighs, pulling me up as I wrap my legs around his waist holding his body up against mine.
I could feel him pressing against me, the heat forming down in my core as I craved to be closer to him.
My hands tangled in his windswept hair, as his lips continued their assault on mine, that was until a car drove by honking at us.
He pulls away breathless, his lips swollen as a smirk tugs at the corner of them. "Let's go inside" he says grabbing my hand as he leads me up the sidewalk to his house.
There were no other cars in the driveway so I assumed that we were alone as we ascended the staircase up to his bedroom.
His room was messier than the last time that I was here, a couple of clothes were sprawled out on the floor as he pushed them to the side when we entered. The smell of his cologne flooded my senses as I closed the door behind us.
I crossed the room in a few steps, my arms wrapping around his neck as my lips found there way his once again.
I wanted him. In this moment I wanted him more than I have ever wanted someone before.
Our lips moved against each others as my hands found their way underneath his shirt. His muscles tenses beneath my touch as I lifted his shirt over his head, breaking the kiss momentarily as I threw it down onto the floor. My veins throbbed and my heart exploded as I discarded my shirt on top of his.
In sync we moved backwards until I felt the backs of my legs pressing up against his bed where he gently laid me down and straddled my hips.
I felt the weight of his body on top of mine pressing me deeper into the mattress as I felt all of him-everything.
His lips tasted sweet as berries. His face has the slightest bit of stubble that rubbed against my skin as he kissed his way down my chest, planting kisses in between my breasts before capturing my lips with his own again.
"Ainsley" he says pulling away as he places his hands against my cheeks making me look at him. "We're not doing this now. Fuck, as much as I want you and as hard as it is for me to stop, you've been through enough today".
I nod as I stare up at him. His hair astray, his lips swollen, but yet still looking gorgeous as the sun shone through the windows accentuating his sharp jawline and chiseled features.
"I want to. I do hun, but I want to make it special for you. I don't want our first time to be plagued with thoughts about what happened earlier" he explains as he looks down at me, my hair sprawled put across his pillow.
He rolls off me and lays against my side tugging my body against his as he runs his hands through my hair "you're beautiful" he muttered pressing a kiss against my cheek.
I at that moment, laying in his arms listening to his heart beat I realized that I loved him and I wanted to scream it from the rooftops.
I was in love with Dawson.
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Word Count: 2035