"I don't suppose you have to believe in ghosts to know that we are all haunted, all of us, by things we can see and feel and guess at, and many more things that we can't." -Beth Gutcheon, More Than You Know
I couldn't stop thinking that the last time I stepped foot in the Martin home, I had been in communication with a man who had been burned alive. While my interaction with him turned out to be less terrifying than anticipated, I was still nervous about the whole situation. So standing in the dark living room with the rest of the team, Karen, and Tommy, I couldn't help but to keep looking over my shoulder to make sure no dead corpse was sneaking up behind me to toss me around or throw laughing-Sesame-Street creatures.
In the glow of a dim lamp, I noticed Ruby and Axl kept glancing nervously down the hall; Axl holding onto a backpack filled with more of our special-white-communicating-candles. It was odd to see a man like Axl with tattoos, piercings, and such muscular arms look frightened, but I guess that's why there's a problem with stereotypes. Richard, Brandon, and Nick, however, looked perfectly unfazed. I wondered how they could be so calm in this situation and chalked it up to pure insanity.
"So, you saw this man in Tommy's room?" Karen said as her son ran circles around us yelling the same damn note of "Ahhhhhh." He didn't seem as concerned about the ghost that night, but he probably had no idea what was going on. We were just people he had seen in his house before, and he now felt comfortable being a little shit around us. Karen made no attempt to make him stop. She was too busy crocheting another misshapen object out of puke-green-yarn.
"I guess the spirit was occasionally showing himself to your son. Kids are usually more likely to sense these kinds of things," Richard explained.
"But. . . he threw you into a closet?!" she said, turning her wide eyes to me.
"Yeah, but that might have been because Nick and I had just . . ."
"The spirit was just distressed," Richard cut me off, shooting me a significant look.
I realized he must have been trying to keep me from telling the client about the shouting match I had with Nick in her house that provoked the spirit. With all the dumb shit I had been doing, saying, and fucking up the past few days, I was getting the feeling Richard was getting pretty sick of me.
"AHHHHH!" Tommy continued his bellowing and running.
Richard had to talk over him. "He was murdered even though everyone thought he had died by suicide. Now his family has left this house. Sometimes spirits lose control when their emotions are running particularly high."
Karen didn't seem to care about Richard's explanation, or any reason why the spirit assaulted me. "You didn't break anything, did you?" she said turning to me. "Did you mess up anything in the closet?"
"AHHHHH!" continued the irritating sound that made me want to stab myself in the ears.
I could feel anger taking over from Karen's comment and her son's lack of respect for adults conversing, and I lost my ability to tolerate the relentlessly rude bitch. "No, but I'm doing just great, thanks for asking."
Nick chuckled beside me.
"Shawn . . ." Richard said, shooting me a warning look.
I sighed, but didn't say anything else. I wasn't going to apologize, if that's what he wanted, but I decided to keep my mouth shut in the future. Karen's eyes were still fixed on me while her hands worked on the green-thing.
"I don't like my things broken or messed up," she said.
I didn't say another word because I knew what would come out of my mouth wouldn't be pleasant at all.
"But we're here tonight so Dean's family can speak to him again," Brandon spoke up. "It will help him pass on and give your family some peace."
"AHHHHH!" Tommy started to wave his arms around now.
"Hey, kid! Cut it out!" Axl blurted out.
Tommy immediate stopped in his tracks and stared at Axl in fear. Karen turned her eyes to him and stared at him hard. I, on the other hand, shot him an appreciative look.
"Um, you know what, Tommy. . . why don't we got sit in the kitchen for a minute? Do you like to color?" Ruby said.
The kid nodded, and Ruby stepped forward and grabbed his hand. "Okay, show me where you keep your crayons and coloring books, and we'll color together."
Tommy started to lead Ruby down the hall. "Oh. Your room. Great," I heard Ruby's retreating voice.
I was glad I wasn't her. Being with a kid in a haunted room would be enough to make me quit on the spot and never come back. We all heard a loud knock at the door. I jumped at the sound and gasped thinking the spirit was coming for me again. Nick snorted beside me, and once I realized I was not in any danger at the moment, I slugged him in the arm. He winced and rubbed his shoulder where I hit him.
"That should be the Vanmeters. Shawn or Nick, maybe you should get the door and speak to them first since they already know you," Richard said.
Nick stepped forward, but I grabbed his arm. "I got this," I said.
I made my way to the front door and opened it. Trevor smiled warmly when he saw me.
"Hello, Shawn."
"Hey," I said, suddenly feeling very hot.
Trevor looked just as clean-cut and sweet as before. This time, he was in more casual clothing; a button-up shirt and jeans. I knew it was completely inappropriate, but I suddenly had the urge to make-out with the dude. Trevor's mother, however, did not look quite as happy to see me as he did. While she was not in her dirty bathrobe anymore, she still looked disheveled and ready to slice me with a butter knife. She glared at me, and I shrunk under her gaze. That little woman could be really fucking intimidating when she wanted to.
"Um. . . " I stuttered, forgetting why I was even standing there. Between Trevor's hotness and Debbie's anger, I was already a fucked up mess even before seeing the dead guy again.
Nick appeared next to me and rested his hand gently on my shoulder. "Why don't you both come in," he said.
I felt so stupid. My mind always betrayed me in situations with people I wasn't familiar with. Again, I found myself wondering if Richard was keeping score in his head of all my fuck-ups, and how many it would take to fire me. I was also confused as to why his opinion suddenly meant so much. Hadn't my original plan been to just work this job temporarily until I found something else? The thought of working anywhere else with different people seemed to depress me.
Trevor and Debbie walked through the door to join everyone else in the living room.
Nick closed the door behind them, then turned to me. "You okay?" he asked quietly so no one else could hear. The sudden urge to run out of that house must have been apparent on my face.
"Yep. I'm good," I lied, my voice sounding uncharacteristically cheerful. He didn't look convinced, but he wrapped his hand around my wrist, and gently guided me back to the group.
Richard and Brandon introduced the Vanmeters to everyone. While they were all saying their hellos, Ruby came into the room, followed by Tommy, who was holding a box of crayons and a Batman coloring book, and stomping his feet to keep up with her. Why do all kids stomp when they walk? Why is that a thing?
Ruby looked a bit shaken up, but since she didn't say anything, I assumed she wasn't attacked while she was in that room. They both made their way into the kitchen, and took their seats at the table. Ruby started talking quietly to Tommy as they both started taking crayons out of the box. She was so good with him. The mothering gene must of skipped me completely.
I focused my attention back to the rest of the group, and saw Trevor smile at me again. I tried to smile back, but I'm pretty sure I just ended up making a weird grimace that was not attractive at all. I've got game, folks.
It was such a strange group of people. We already had our quirky team that I was used to, but now we had added a rude crochet-freak, an angry butter- knife-wielding-woman, and a very hot potential make-out-guy. The whole scene was starting to look funny to me. . . until I remembered the dead guy awaiting us.
"Last time we were able to make contact with Dean was in Tommy's bedroom, so we should probably head that way," Richard said.
"I'm not watching some burned guy tear up my son's room. I'll stay here," Karen said, making her way into the kitchen.
"Jesus," I mumbled, shaking my head at her insensitive comment.
I glanced at Trevor, who was looking at Karen, completely bewildered. He looked back at me in a questioning manner, and I shrugged. I had no idea what to say to any of that.
"Well, that's good. Ruby can join us again," Richard said.
Ruby dropped a pink crayon, and slowly stood up. She looked sadly down at her coloring page. "Do I have to?"
"Ruby, you're not the kid here. You're here to do a job," Axl said.
"Bite me, Axl," she said.
"Stop," Richard cut in. "We're not going back to kindergarten again, we're in front of clients."
Axl and Ruby fell silent. She made her way over to join us. At least I was out of the fuck-up-spotlight that time. Karen sat down at the kitchen table to finish her green lump, and Tommy continued coloring. It left us to finally do what we came to do. Which I dreaded. A lot.
Richard, Brandon, and Nick led the way, while the rest of us hung as far back as possible, delaying the inevitable. We made it about halfway down the hall before I stopped.
"Wait," I said. Everyone turned to look at me. I could see the obvious annoyance etched on Richard's face. I turned to Trevor and Debbie. "We should talk first." I grabbed Trevor's hand and pulled him back into the living room, and Debbie followed.
"There's something I need to warn you about. It's something I wish I had been warned about the first time I saw Dean," I said, shooting a glance down the hall at the others who stood waiting, looking impatient. I ushered Trevor and Debbie a few more feet away, so the others could neither see us, or hear us. "When you see Dean, you're going to see him exactly as he was when he passed away," I told them.
"What are you saying?" Debbie said. She seemed incredibly inconvenienced to talk to her dead husband.
"She's saying," Trevor spoke up, his face stony, "that dad will look exactly the way I found him that day he died. His body will be. . . " His voice trailed off, and he looked away, taking a deep breath.
"It's not a pretty sight," I said, gently touching Trevor's shoulder. "It's actually pretty jarring. He's the first spirit I have ever seen, so to say I was shocked is putting it mildly. No one warned me because they forgot, and I don't want you to feel the same way I did, especially since he is your father and husband."
Debbie put her hand to her mouth and I thought she might be sick, but she just stood there staring at me, her hand shaking over her mouth, her eyes closed.
"If you don't feel ready for this, you can tell me, and we can postpone. I would completely understand. If you do want to do this, just know that even though you don't know me that well, I will be right by both your sides to help you in any way I can," I assured them.
Trevor looked at his trembling mother. "What do you think, mom?"
"I. . . I don't know," her voice was stronger than I thought it would be. "I don't even know if any of this is real."
Trevor turned to me. "You know, I was the number one suspect in his murder investigation. . . before they ruled it a suicide. It was all because I just happened to be the first one to find him." His voice was bitter and strained.
"How could anyone think you did that?" I said.
He shook his head. "It doesn't matter now. The point is, it's not me I'm worried about. I can handle it. I'm more worried about mom."
"I can do it. I'll be okay," his mother said.
"Are you sure? Don't do it for my sake," Trevor said.
"I'm sure," she said, as if she were insulted by his graciousness.
I gave them an encouraging smile, then turned to head back into the hallway, but I stopped dead in my tracks to see Richard standing right behind me while the others peaked around the hall door frame behind him.
"Oh!" I said. "I didn't realize. . ."
"That we were listening? I figured that. Come on," he said. I couldn't read the expression on his face, so I had no idea if he was mad at me for holding up the investigating and almost having the whole night postponed.
Debbie, Trevor, and I followed him and the others back down the hallway again. We all then squeezed ourselves into Tommy's room.
"This used to be mom and dad's bedroom," Trevor said, looking around at all the toys.
"This is also where he threw you into a closet," Nick mumbled to me.
"What?" Debbie said, looking between Nick and myself.
"Not important," I said quickly, ignoring the questioning look on Trevor's face.
I didn't think it would be good for him to know that his father had violently attacked me. It didn't seem like it would make the grieving process any better. Axl chucked his backpack down on the batman bed, and started digging through it, passing around white candles to everyone. Richard went around the room, lighting each one.
"Is this a seance' or something?" Debbie asked, staring at her white candle.
"Something like that," I said.
Ruby turned the lights out and the room was once again plunged into darkness, only lit with the soft light of the candles. We all stood in a circle, looking nervously at each other. I really didn't want to be a part of any of it anymore, but I had already committed and made it that far.
"Dean Vanmeter, are you here?" Richard said, quietly.
We all waited a moment, but heard and saw nothing.
"This is ridiculous," Debbie said. "I can't believe I let you all talk me into this."
"Mom, calm down. Just give it a minute," Trevor said soothingly. He was cute AND comforting. I tried not to swoon.
"It worked last time when Shawn called for him," Axl said.
"Huh? What?" I said, pulling my eyes off Trevor.
"Yeah, Shawn, you try it." said Brandon.
"Oh. Okay, I guess," I said. "Dean, are you here? We brought your family like you asked."
It only took a few seconds, and the room was filled with a soft glow, as Dean appeared beside Tommy's bed. He was just as charred as before. At least I was expecting it this time. It wasn't quite as mind-blowing, but it was still pretty gruesome to look at.
"Holy crap," Trevor said beside me, taking a step back, and grabbing my arm to steady himself. I didn't mind at all.
"Oh, my God," Debbie gasped.
"Well, I'll be damned," Dean said, his floppy eye staring at his wife and son. "You actually brought them here."
"I told you we would," I said.
"Debbie? Trevor?"
"Oh, this is insane," Trevor said, still clutching my arm tightly.
Debbie said nothing. She was staring at Dean, unable to say anything or even move. It was as if he had shocked her into a trance.
"Dad?" Trevor finally spoke up.
"Son," Dean said, flesh sliding off his charred face.
Debbie made a noise that sounded like a poorly suppressed gagging sound. I was on the verge of gagging, myself.
"Look, there's something I really needed to say to you all. Please," he said.
For the first time since I met Dean, he had dropped his sullen angry attitude, and he seemed genuinely sincere. Neither Debbie or Trevor answered. They both stood rooted to their spots, staring in horror at the man they once loved.
"Please?" Dean said again, starting to look desperate. "You need to know I didn't kill myself. I didn't choose to leave you."
"Then who did this to you?!" Debbie finally gasped.
Dean shook his head, "No idea." He explained to his son and wife about how he had been attacked from behind, then tied up, and burned. He also told them about the mystery person in the mask.
"You don't even have a guess of who did it?" Trevor asked, his eyes fixed on the bed, not on Dean. I suppose it was hard to look at his father that way.
"The last thing I remember is him saying, 'I'll be back for you later,'" Dean said.
"I'll be back for you later?" Ruby spoke up. "What would that mean? I mean, it wouldn't mean he would come back to kill you, he was already doing that."
"Yeah, that's odd," Brandon said.
"I don't know. I figured he meant like 'see you in hell' or something. I didn't really have time to figure it out, did I?" Dean said, his hanging eyeball fixed on her.
"Did you have any enemies? Or someone that wanted to kill you?" Axl asked.
"Well, plenty of people didn't like me. I just didn't realize there was anyone who hated me enough to murder me," Dean said.
"You'd be surprised what people are capable of," I said.
"Well, it doesn't matter now. I'm already dead," Dean said, then fixed his gaze on Trevor and Debbie. "And that brings me to now. I know I wasn't what you expected me to be. I know I caused you pain, and for that, I'm sorry."
Debbie put her hand to her mouth and tried to suppress a sob. Trevor looked away from us all, hiding his face.
"Maybe we should give them a minute alone," I said.
Trevor looked at me gratefully while the other members of the group nodded in agreement. We all left the room one by one, and went in the living room to give them some peace.
"I'll be back for you later?" Ruby said again, once we were in the living room. "That has to mean something." She and Axl took a seat on the nearest sofa. Karen eyed them from the kitchen, while she sat still crocheting her green lump, and Tommy was scribbling randomly on his coloring page, ignoring the picture entirely. I had a feeling Karen didn't like them placing their butts on her precious couch. She didn't say anything, though.
"I agree, but what?" Richard said.
The rest of us looked to each other for answers, but nobody had a clue.
"I bet it was Trevor." Nick said.
I turned to glare at him, "Really? Why would it be Trevor?"
"Well, I heard the guy say the cops thought it was him anyway, but couldn't prove it? His son would make the most sense, especially since he was abused."
"Dean said it was someone stronger than him. Look at Trevor. There's no way he could knock him out and drag him down the stairs," Axl said.
"Yeah, you're right. He is a scrawny little twerp," Nick agreed.
"What's your beef with Trevor? You've barely known him a minute," Ruby said.
"What? Oh, nothing. I'm just observing his lack of muscles and overall manliness," Nick replied.
"Uh-huh," Ruby said, looking suspicious.
Trevor and his mother finally emerged from the hallway, and walked in the living room to join us. Their eyes look red and puffy, like they'd been crying.
"Are you guys okay?" I asked.
"Yeah. He's gone. I think he's passed on," Debbie said.
She suddenly stepped forward toward me. I thought for sure she was about to smack me, or bring out her trusty butter knife to stab me. Instead, she threw her arms around me in a tight hug. I was caught completely off guard, but I gave her a quick hug back.
"Thank you so much. I'm sorry I didn't believe you," she whispered.
"You're welcome," I said.
She finally let go, then Trevor stepped forward and pulled me into a hug, as well.
"Thanks, Shawn," he said, lingering a little longer than his mother had. He then pulled away, "And thanks to the rest of you, as well. It was something that we really needed."
"We should probably all get going," Richard said.
"So are you done? You got rid of the dead guy?" Karen called from the kitchen.
I shook my head in disbelief.
"Yeah, you're good now," Axl called back, showing her a thumbs up.
"Okay, then yes. You should leave now," she said.
We were all more than glad to leave her home. We made our way outside, and Trevor and his mother walked towards their car, while the rest of us headed back to the van. I glanced back to their car and saw Trevor staring at me.
"Wait, Shawn," he called. I stopped in my tracks as he walked over. "Thanks again. It was really nice of you to go out of your way to help us, especially since you had to convince us that you weren't crazy," he said.
I laughed, "It's no problem at all. I'm glad I could help."
"That number that you wrote down the other day . . . is that where I can reach you at all times? You know, in case I need anything? Or do you have a cell phone number?" he asked.
I heard Nick cough hard behind me. It sounded like a growl turned into a cough. Ruby giggled.
"I actually don't have a cell phone right now. I smashed it," I said.
"You smashed it?" he asked, looking confused.
"It's a long story. I'll be getting a new one soon, but until then, that number I gave you is the best way to reach me right now. Just during the day, though."
"I see. Then I guess I'll have to keep that in mind," he said. "Well, I'll let you go. Maybe I'll see you around."
"Yeah, maybe." I said.
He turned and headed back to his car. Grinning, I headed back to the van, then climbed in the back where the rest of the group was waiting.
"What the fuck was that?" Nick asked, as I took my seat beside him on the little bench.
"Hey, watch your language. That kind of talk is offensive to me," I joked.
"It sounds like that guy wants to take Shawn out," Ruby said.
"Or fuck her," Axl added.
"Stop being gross, Axl," I said.
"How can a guy talk to his dead, charred father, then turn around and try to hit on someone? That spells psychopath to me," Nick said.
"Maybe Shawn was just really distracting for him," Brandon said.
Nick rolled his eyes, "Are you going to go out with him?"
"He didn't ask me out. He just asked if he could reach me if he had any questions. That doesn't mean anything. Like I said before, I'm not ready to date anytime soon," I said. "Instead of focusing on some random hot, flirty guy, why don't we take the time to appreciate the fact that we just helped someone? We helped Dean pass on, and we helped his family get some closure. I never thought I would say this, but I really think I love this job."
"I knew you would," Brandon said, smiling at me from the passenger seat.
"For the first time I feel like I actually made a difference for someone . . . in a good way. Although, Karen certainly didn't seem to give a shit. She was just glad we didn't mess up her house, and she didn't even thank us," I said.
Richard looked back at me in the rear-view mirror. "Sometimes you'll do something to help someone and they won't thank you. You don't need to seek validation through someone else. If you know you did good, that should be enough."
"I guess," I said, slumping back in my seat.
"There will be plenty more opportunities to be thanked. We have a lot of cases, and they seem to be increasing within the last few weeks for some reason," Richard went on.
"Awesome," I said, smiling enthusiastically. "I mean, not that I hope people are dead, or dying, or anything. . . but the prospect of more work actually excites me."
"Yay! Dead people!" Axl said, pumping his fist in the air in victory.