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A/N: I don't even know where to begin with an apology. I know that I completely fell off the face of the Earth and left this story on a major cliffhanger. It was never my intentions to leave this story so open ended, but truth be told, life sort of got in the way of me writing this story. However, I've been planning this final chapter (as well as an epilogue coming very soon) for quite some time, and I've spent the last several weeks writing it. I hope that you all like it, and I'm so sorry that it took so long. Much love as always <3
Getting to know you question: What has been your favorite part of this story?
"I was starting to think that you'd never understand just how much I care for you."
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I had to get to Audrey's apartment as soon as possible. I needed to talk to her or Jade or really anyone that I knew would listen. I probably looked insane as I made the commute to her apartment with tears running down my face and every other breath being more of a choked hiccup rather than a real inhale of air. I knew that Audrey would be home, so I was sure that I'd be able to catch her at a good time.
I was desperately knocking on her door, jittery and close to exploding with being overwhelmed.
"[Y/N]?" She questioned, taking in my sobbing frame. "What's the matter?" Audrey asked desperately, clearly not expecting me to show up at her doorstep in a spiral of tears.
"I'm-I'm...It's-he..." I blubbered.
I was at a level of emotional and overwhelmed that I hadn't felt in a long time. I was hysterically crying, like the kind that I had only experienced a handful of times in my life. The tears were falling faster than I could wipe them away, wetting my cheeks and reddening to my eyes to the max.
"[Y/N], what is going on?" Audrey's hands came to my shoulders, her light brows furrowing in immense concern.
I was hardly coherent. A year's worth of bottled up and pushed down feelings were all coming out at once. Audrey ushered me into her apartment, afraid that her neighbors would be disturbed by my wailing. She brought me into her kitchen, sitting me down at the small table in the middle of it. I was shaking all over, and she had never seen me quite like this.
Audrey was flustered, completely clueless as to what was going on or what to do. An extra pair of footsteps echoed closer until they stopped cold at the doorway of the kitchen. Through red and teary eyes, I saw David standing with a surprised expression on his face. I realized in the cloud of my upset that I had clearly not caught Audrey at a good time.
I knew that Audrey and David had been seeing each other often, but I genuinely hadn't expected him to be at her apartment.
"I'm s-sorry. I didn't know-"
"No, no. Please don't be sorry," David said as kindly as he could. "Clearly you need Audrey more than I do." David tried to joke to ease the tension.
Audrey took a seat in the other chair, lovingly resting her hand on my shoulder.
"David and I were just spending the afternoon together. He was kind enough to lend a helping hand with organizing my office like you and Jade always tell me to do." Audrey smiled, her sympathetic nature beginning to come to light now that the initial shock was wearing off.
I made another attempt at trying to tell her what was happening, but my attempt was fruitless. Apparently, I wasn't very good at articulating when I was having a "coming to self" moment.
"Travis-...Sinclair, I..." I continued to cry, and it was clear that this conversation wasn't going anywhere.
"Sinclair?" David asked, standing up straight from where he had been leaning against the doorway. "What'd he do?"
Audrey turned to look at him, her green eyes softening even further at the sight of David being suddenly so protective. She appreciated his concern, but it seemed that three was a crowd.
"David, would you mind giving us a minute?" Audrey requested, her freckled face beaming into a smile.
David hesitated, because I think he was ready to give Sinclair the chewing out of a lifetime if he had been the reason for me falling apart like this. However, Audrey's kind smile won out, and David gave a nod and retreated back into Audrey's office space. Her attention returned to me, and her voice was gentle as she spoke.
"[Y/N], I need you to calm down for me. Take a deep breath, and tell me what's going on." She persuaded, taking my hand into hers.
I took a few moments, taking a few deep breaths to regain my composure and reset my head. Audrey was patient as she waited for me to get my thoughts together, allowing the silence to grow as I pulled myself together.
I thought about my conversation with Travis. I took a moment to notice the massive pressure that had been lifted from my shoulders. I allowed myself to enjoy the fact that I was finally ready to completely love Sinclair. It was a sweet feeling, and one that I never thought I'd have the chance to feel. My tears stopped for a few minutes, and I was much more mellowed out now. I opened my mouth to speak to coherently explain what had happened, when Audrey's front door opened with a frantic squeak. Audrey's eyes widened and her brows furrowed at yet another visitor (and this visitor didn't even bother to knock first).
Jade appeared in the kitchen, also crying and sobbing to a point of hysterics. The sight of Jade's tears sent me over the edge again, and I was right back into a puddle of wails and sobs.
"J? What's the matter?" Audrey questioned, becoming flustered again now that I was sobbing again and now she had an additional friend that was distraught.
Jade had always been better than me when it came to expressing her feelings, and she was able to answer Audrey's question the first time.
"The-the...the BAKERY." She practically howled, falling into another round of hysterical sobs.
Jade and I were sobbing uncontrollably, staring at one another in confusion as we cried. Now I was worried about Jade, as well as trying to get myself under control. Audrey sat Jade down at the last free seat at her table, trying to keep us both from completely breaking down. Although, it might've been a little late for that.
"Did-did you officially go under?" I hiccuped, referring to Jade now.
Jade shook her head with another round of cries and sniffles sounding from her.
"No! Someone saved it." She wailed, and I suddenly realized that she was crying tears of relief and joy.
Audrey and I glanced at one another, confused as to what Jade meant.
"What do you mean 'saved it'?" Audrey asked.
"I don't know who and I don't know how, but somebody paid off the bank," Jade explained, holding a tissue to her nose. "They also left enough money to remodel and basically start the bakery over from scratch."
On the surface, that made absolutely no sense. There was no one that any of us knew that was kind enough to make that kind of donation with that kind of money and still be sitting comfortably at the end of it all.
"Jade, that's incredible," Audrey gawked, feeling just as surprised as I was. "You have no idea as to who it was?"
"They didn't say. It was an anonymous donation. I didn't even know that was a thing," Jade blubbered. "Whoever it was, they're my literal saving grace."
So much was happening at once, and in such a small amount of time. I was finally letting go of a year's worth of hurt and emotional damage, Jade's career was no longer at the hands of fate and time, and Audrey was just plain confused.
"So you're going to stay in London?" Audrey wondered, looking at Jade with hope in her eyes.
"Yeah, I am." Jade sniffed, offering a giggle through her tears that was laced with relief.
Smiles were plastered on all three of our faces, the three of us huddling together for a group hug. It was such a weight off of all of us to know that Jade wasn't going to be leaving. The three of us weren't the same without each other. Jade deserved the world, and I really had a feeling that this was her second chance at an even better life. Her parents loved their small sweets shop, and if they were still around, they'd be beyond proud of their Little J.
"I have a lot of work to do, but at least now I know that the business is safe. Can I count on a tabloid reporter and a famous novelist to lend a helping hand?" Jade questioned, laughing once more.
"Hell yeah, you can!" Audrey shrilled, hugging Jade again and thanking her lucky stars that she was staying for good.
"It's not like I'm doing much work anyways. I'd love to." I agreed with Audrey.
The three of us sat at Audrey's kitchen table, chatting about all the new possibilities that were in store for Jade and her new vision for the bakery. She was going to be stellar in her new place, and I was beyond excited for her. As the minutes passed, both Jade and I were able to stop our maddening sobbing, and become a little more level headed. Half an hour passed as we talked on and on, the occasional sound of David rummaging around in Audrey's office sounding out. Half an hour later, suddenly the torch was passed to me.
"I nearly forgot, [Y/N]. How was it with Travis?" Audrey turned to me, curiosity thick over her features.
In all honesty, I had almost forgotten about it, even after all of that drama that I brought into Audrey's apartment.
"It was...good." I spoke freely and slowly.
There wasn't really any other word to describe it. Was it freeing? Sure. Did it bring me closure? Absolutely. It went well. It was just....good.
"Meaning...?" Jade prompted
I thought of how that dreaded conversation with Travis had brought me to a light that had been burning brighter and brighter with each passing day over the course of the summer. That glorious, shining sunlight had warmed me up from the icy trench that I had trapped myself in. That sunshine was Sinclair, and Sinclair had been my forever answer.
I thought of Sinclair again. His blonde hair, his kind eyes, and every little thing that I adored about him. There was no doubt that I loved that man. I had told Sinclair before that I loved him. It had been once, in a way it had almost been in passing. But now that I knew he was it, that he was the one — I needed to tell him again.
"I love Sinclair. I love him so much that I can't even describe it," I told them, and they both melted into their seats. "I don't know how I could've fallen in love so fast, but I've never been so sure of anything in my life."
Jade reached for my hand, holding it in her small, delicate fingers.
"Oh, [Y/N]. You'll never understand how happy it makes me to see you so happy." She remarked.
"I knew that Sinclair was perfect for you," Audrey admitted. "I'm so grateful that you decided to take a chance on him."
I hadn't really thought of it that way, but Audrey was right. Despite my initial reservations and my doubts, I had taken a chance on Sinclair. I wouldn't call Sinclair a risk necessarily, but I definitely knew that there were some odds of things not panning out the way that I wanted it to.
I needed to see Sinclair. I needed to see him as soon as possible. I wasn't sure what exactly I was going to say. Maybe I'd fall to my knees and beg him to forgive me for not trusting him sooner. Or perhaps I should've sobbed to him as an apology for making him have to work so hard for me. Or maybe I'd even tell him over and over and over again how much I loved him. I'd figure it out on the way, but now I needed to get there.
"I have to go," I announced, frantically standing from my seat to get myself into motion. "I love you both. And I am so happy for both of you." I said referring to Jade's bakery and Audrey's apparent relationship with David.
Audrey and Jade both stood from the table as well, ushering me out of Audrey's front door.
"Go get him," Audrey took me into her arms for another hug. "Go tell your forever that you love him."
Jade was anxious for me to go before I lost my nerve, practically escorting me out of Audrey's apartment.
"We love you. You're going to have the greatest love story to ever be told." Jade smiled, and sent me on my way with a friendly kiss on the cheek.
I was now on a mission to get to Sinclair's house. All I could think about was him. All I could hear was his voice. All my heart wanted was him. The end of the day was nearing, the sun sinking closer and closer to the horizon line to signal the beginning of night. I couldn't wrap my head around how bizarre today had been, and the day wasn't even over yet.
I honestly don't remember much of the trip to Sinclair's house. I was so determined and distracted from everything around me that I was in a daze until I was walking up to Sinclair's front door. I went for the spare key that was kept near one of the perfectly sculpted bushes nearby, unlocking the door to allow myself in.
I marched inside, scanning the foyer and the front hallway for any sign of him. His car keys and personal belongings were stationed near the front door, which let me know that he was likely home. I traversed through the house, looking for any sign of where he could be.
"Sinclair?" I called, not seeing him in the living area or the sunroom.
Sinclair wasn't anywhere inside, and I was beginning to think that he wasn't home and maybe caught a ride with someone. I double checked the kitchen, looking for any other sign that he was home. My eyes caught a glimpse of the folded piece of paper that was secured to the refrigerator, and I felt a burst of relief. I took the note into my hands, opening it to reveal Sinclair's familiar handwriting.
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Darling,
I'll be outside in the garden whenever you see this. It's such a lovely day that I thought I'd take advantage of it. Come see me when you get home. Don't rush yourself.
Sincerely,
Sinclair
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I didn't even pocket the note like I usually did with the previous ones. I put it back on the refrigerator door, scurrying to the back door of Sinclair's house that led into the backyard. I had to navigate his massive property to where the main garden was, and sure enough, Sinclair was in the depths of it. He was observing more than anything else, because he took pride in his landscaping. I followed the path through the garden, keeping my eyes locked on his tall frame. His back was towards me, and he had yet to notice my presence. My voice was clear as I spoke, and maybe even a bit confident.
"Sinclair." I said gently to get his attention.
He turned around at the sound of my voice, a soft smile on his face that was always there when he looked at me. However, his smile didn't last long once he registered my current state. He took a few steps, taking my face into his hand.
"My love..." He hushed, "Have you been crying?"
His face was full of worry, concern dripping off of his features. I was significantly calmer now, calm enough to where I could form sentences that weren't broken apart with sobs and hiccups. I was still crying, but it was a much softer, peaceful kind of cry. My head lolled into his hand when it came to cradle my cheek. His sweet, tender eyes were like looking into mine with curious wonder, waiting patiently for my response. I only continued to look at him. The words were present in my head, but continued to bounce around without actually coming out.
"Darling, what's the matter?" He tried again. "How did it go?"
I wasn't even thinking about Travis. At this point, Travis felt like nothing more than a minor blip in my past. All of a sudden, the seemingly endless months of heartbreak and the yearning for what could've been didn't matter anymore. It had taken me far too long to realize that I shouldn't have been so hung up on the past. I shouldn't have been hurt over what I had lost. I should've looked forward to what had yet to come.
I needed to say it. I needed to say it right now while the moment was right. There was no better moment right now than for me to tell Sinclair what I had felt from the moment that the stars in our galaxies danced together. Even if I hadn't realized it in the beginning, that didn't mean that it wasn't real. But now that I did know....
It was the realest thing that I would ever feel.
"I love you."
The sun was setting over Sinclair's estate. The sky was painted with the prettiest sunset I had ever seen. A mixture of blues, purples, and oranges that casted a glow over him that made him look even more handsome. This moment felt all too real. It felt all too right.
"Oh, my love," He said in an appreciative, but surprised tone. "I love you."
"I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else. I love you more than I ever thought that I could love someone," I confessed, spilling everything that I had been feeling since I had met him. "I want to spend forever with you and I want to love you until I'm gone from this world."
Sinclair was visibly rocked by my sudden words, and while he believed it, I'm pretty sure he thought that I was having some kind of psychotic break.
"Darling, where is all of this coming from? I've never seen you so upset." He hushed, bringing his hand to my back to comfort me.
"I'm not upset," I said through tears. "I mean, I know I look upset, but I'm not."
"Then why the tears, bunny?" He carefully persuaded, swiping at a fresh tear.
"Because I've never been so happy." I told him, and it seemed to all click in his mind.
He pulled me into his chest for an embrace. It was warm, comforting, and one that I could have for the rest of my life.
"I was starting to think that you'd never understand just how much I care for you." He joked, kissing the crown of my head.
I shared a laugh with him, because I could only imagine how I had made him feel the last couple of months.
"It wasn't always so clear to me." I laughed again, pulling back from his arms and wiping at my tears.
As if my day couldn't have gotten any more interesting, Sinclair brought his own wild card to the table. Sinclair had always been skilled at reading the room and taking advantage of a perfect situation, and right now was no different.
"Can I really make it clear for you?" He asked.
Before I could respond, Sinclair reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. It was a velvet box, a small cube shape that I knew could only be one thing. My eyes widened when he opened the lid to reveal a round, halo style diamond ring. It was beautiful. It was absolutely stunning in every single way. There was no way...surely he wasn't.
"I bought it when we were in Paris. I'll admit that it was more challenging that I originally anticipated," Sinclair began to ramble on like he more than often did. "If you don't like it, I'm sure I can exchange it somehow and-"
Sinclair cut himself off when he realized that he wasn't saying much of value. He didn't want to lose this moment while he had it at his disposal.
"[Y/N], my love...will you marry me?" He asked, and I nearly thought that my soul came back to life that very instant.
This was a no brainer. The easiest yes of my entire life. Sinclair kissed me after my acceptance, his smile appearing through the kiss. How he knew my ring size, I have no idea - but it was a perfect fit as he slid it onto my left ring finger with a shaky hand. We stood together for a few moments, just completely rattled and totally at bliss with one another.
We were getting married. It seemed insane, and definitely not traditional considering it hadn't been more than a summer. But I was so sure about this. I was completely confident in this decision. It was right. And we both knew it.
"Today has been crazy. Between everything going on with me, and then Jade's bakery..."
"Ah. I was wondering if you had heard about that yet." Sinclair left a kiss on my forehead.
I was puzzled by that. Surely, Sinclair didn't know yet. If I had just found out, there was no way that word had reached him.
"How do you know about that?" I questioned.
"I might've made a...friendly donation." Sinclair stated, a warm smirk appearing on his features.
"You did?" I asked in a whisper, and my heart exploded in my chest.
"Oh, [Y/N], I couldn't just let her go under. She's far too talented and she's put so much love into that place. I couldn't not do anything."
Sinclair had been the one to make the grand donation. Of course it was him. He was the only person I knew that had enough love in his heart to do something like that, and expect nothing in return. I didn't think it was possible, but I fell even more in love with him at that moment. I had fallen in love with him at first sight, but I had fallen in love with his heart too...which became clearer and clearer to me that he was made up of his heart. I was in love with all of him.
"You are something else, you know that?" I posed to him, and he laughed.
"Well, I suppose I'm fine with that. As long as you still love me as I am." He continued to smile.
"Always." I promised.
I'm not sure what it was at that moment, but I suddenly had a vision. An epiphany was honestly a better word for it. I had an idea that I knew was a bit of a risk, but an idea that I knew was a good one.
I knew exactly what I wanted my next book to be.
He saw the wheels turning in my head, and I even think he knew what exactly I had just struck gold on.
"Hey, Sinclair..." I began, changing the subject a bit. "How would you feel about being the protagonist of a romance novel?"
"You want to write a story about me?" Sinclair asked, looking both puzzled and flattered.
"A story about us," I clarified, smiling at him through tears of joy. "I want to write our story...with your help. How does that sound to you?"
Sinclair let out an exhale of wonder and honor, kissing me sweetly and softly.
"I think that's a wonderful idea." He grinned.
"Honestly?" I asked just to be sure.
He only smiled bigger and brighter, pulling me into his chest, close to his heart that was forever mine.
"Sincerely." He kissed me again.
I already knew how I was going to start the book, fill the book, and finish the book. This was going to be the easiest story that I had ever written, because the book had already happened. I had three months of material and content to pick and choose from to write the most perfect, seamless romance story.
And the very first line of my forever love story goes like this:
'Life had an odd way of offering a chance at starting over...a chance that was frightening, confusing, and oh so beautifully perfect.'
And that was the beginning of the best and most successful book that I'd ever write. The beginning of the greatest and most perfect love that I'd ever know.
That was the beginning of Sincerely, Sinclair.