Saturday morning came in bright clear sky with a soft wind for today's game day and I was surprisingly feeling very excited and energetic. Besides facing another team that's known to be the toughest, I was looking forward to how the team's gonna be played today.
And if they really taken in what me and the girls have taught them yesterday at training with them.
Having my old team at training was exactly what I needed yesterday. To feel like I'm on levelled ground, that I wasn't so alone and needed to hide my skills and tactics away, because a huge group of boys have their butts handed to them by a little girl.
The girls and I have helped them improve on a lot of things that was lacking from the team which I saw when we were playing the friendly game.
Regardless that we've beaten them with many goals, they have really done well yesterday and for this match, they'll do even better.
I was very nervous about having the Head Coach of Golden Angels soccer girls come watch me play today. This match will decide wither I'm suitable for their team or not.
When I'm playing on the field later, I'm gonna be watched for ninety minutes where I have to perform at my best, have to be way far on top of my own game.
With that thought in mind, I woke up way earlier than I would hope, training on the hickey field after jogging more than an hour and a half. My nerves felt like a ball of paper that was crashed and straighten out over and over again, leaving it into a huge mess.
Not wanting to tell anyone about this whole Golden Angels thing, wanting only Ryan to know about it and not feel even more nervous than I do already.
Luckily none of my family could make it for today's game which I'm grateful for in a way. Loving their sweet, encouraging messages for the game even more.
The match would have started at nine o'clock, but was moved to one thirty hopefully due to the Blue Shark's bus breaking down.
So happy that we got a few hours of peace to calm ourselves down, mostly myself before we finally play. I was with the gang in Franklin's dorm room for the first time, besides Kevin, Janelle and Daytona who has been here more than most of us.
His room was almost similar than David and Ryan's, expect it doesn't have its own bathroom and there's two bookshelves built into the wall above his roommate's bed.
Most of us found a place to sit on the floor while Janelle and Daytona took their seats on the roommate's bed. While chatting to each other, most of us were on our phones and others were watching Kevin and Frankie beating each other in a video game that Johnny and Andy would play back home whenever they're together.
While I was sitting on the floor with my back leaning against Frankie's bed, having Penny lying her head in my lap as I ran my fingers through her hair, being lost in thought. Thousands and thousands of them were running and flying through my mind like shooting stars, never stopping, never slowing down.
I was thinking about my time being in Knights' team, how short it has been and will it be like if I join Golden Angels' team after today's game. The training where I don't feel like I'm seen as equal.
When playing a game where most of the guys for the last couple of days, they tolerate playing with me until the last minute.
According to Ryan, I'm an influence to the team, that the players have started pushing themselves to be better on the field, including David. But I'm also seen as some golden star who stealing everyone's shine and the team's spotlight itself.
Personally I haven't felt like I'm part of the team since the first game I've played with them. And I don't think that I'll ever be seen or felt like there is a place for me.
Won't feel like I'm part of the team besides the fact that I have a couple of friends and can play as good as everyone else.
Some part of me is thinking about taking Golden Angels' open window of letting me join their team, causing me to focus more on my skills and play on the field. I would have decided not to play today, if I haven't gotten that email from them and would have watch the game with my friends.
While another part of me feels like I'm cutting and running from a team that I've only joined after four games. The one thing that I don't let myself become known for, is exactly what I was doing. I'm quitting after getting my hands dirty and have the work half finished, sucks standing in front of a crossroad like this.
My thoughts were cut short when Charlotte, Ryan and David walked into the room, they were greeting everyone with a hug or the boys would do this handshake before doing a 'bro hug'.
David and I haven't talked much to each other since last night, I know that we've both agree to talk after the game. But now it starting to feel like we were either dragging the conversation or pushing it under the carpet.
He looked almost unsure if he should hug me or not, so to stop his brain from going into overdrive and shut down, I stood up and made the first move.
Wrapping my arms lightly around his waist as his moved slowly around me, lightly squeezing him as the shooting stars in my mind suddenly stopped.
Hugging him for a short moment before moving away, "Is the bus still down?"
"Nothing yet." He said with a small smile, noticing that he was a little bit too tense, so he dropped his shoulders slightly and calmed himself and his foot.
Biting my lip to keep myself from chuckling a little bit at the fact that I notice his tapping before he did. "But Uncle Richie is keeping us posted."
Nodding my head when Kevin made this victory cry while Frankie groaned in frustration, "Come on, I had you. How did you get out of that one?!"
Giving the almost red faced Frankie a schmuck smirk that Kevin got in round one from him, "Kuma sucks, bro. Told ya that I'm gonna get you back."
Looking at the scoreboard, seeing that theirs are between two thousand and two thousand and ninety nine. Causing me to smile when I think back to the summer time when I was still at home with Johnny, "I can beat you two."
Both guys paused their game to look at me, then each other before softly chuckling amongst themselves. Shaking my head by these two's reaction to what I've said and I wasn't the only one, Charlie jump in to defend me,
"What are you two laughing about? You don't know what this girl has up her sleeves when it comes to playing your videogame."
"We don't have anything against Jenna to play with us." Frankie raised his hands in surrender, turning himself around to face all of us as he tried explaining, "But this game isn't something that you can just play, I mean you have to know how each character play, their power attacks and weapons."
Most boys always make something up whenever a girl wants to play with their videogames.
That was my thought as I crossed my arms saying, "My brothers play this game back home and has taught me everything that I need to know how to play it. Plus I bet that I can beat both of your characters using the weakest character in the whole game."
That statement caused both boys including David and Ryan to become interested in the possibility that a weak character can take down a stronger one.
And not just one, but two of them. Janelle lean forward, staring at me with curious eyes, "Can that actually happen?"
"Not a chance." Kevin said almost too confidently which is always the first sign of failure in this case. But ignorance is bliss truly, "A weak character can't beat a stronger character in any videogame, it's basic facts."
Shrugging my shoulders, smirking at the two boys who really don't know the game as well as I do which caused me to become even more excited, "Let's put that theory to the test, just to see if it's true or not."
Just like that I was sitting on the floor once again, having a game controller in my hands and nearly destroying both Frankie and Kevin in the fourth round that we've entered.
Scoring a higher score than them and they tried keeping up while I tried remember most of the things that Johnny and Andy taught me about how to play this one character.
Barely winning this round, Ryan and David's phones went off, "Uncle Richie just heard from the Sharks, their bus are back on the road, they'll be here in the next twenty five minutes. So, the match today might start around twelve side for the latest."
"It just became eleven fifteen." I checked the time on my phone, logging out and letting the guys enjoy the rest of the game after proving my point about beating a stronger character by using a weak one.
Ryan nodded his head with a small smile on his face, "Doesn't matter what time we play, I got a feeling that we're gonna win this one."
"Yeah man," David agreed while fist bumping his best friend when their phones vibrated again with another notification. "We've won the Sharks last season, so we might -"
Both guys' expression changed instantly when they both looked at the notification that they've gotten. The smiles and confident dropped into shock, white hot anger and a slight sense of fear.
I wasn't the only one to notice, Charlie lightly touched David's hand, "Something wrong, David?"
Both guys didn't answer her which worried us both. Penny seemed to worry also, because she reached out to hold Ryan's hand lightly which got him to blink for the first time before turning his head to her, "Are you ok?"
Nodding his head painfully slow before squeezing her hand in comfort when David finally looked up, staring me right in the eyes where everything was laid in front of me.
Green fire of anger and fear burn through our stare which was cut short when I open my mouth to ask what happened, "Come on, Ryan. Uncle Richard's waiting on us."
He didn't say Uncle Richie, did something happen?
That thought jumped into my head when the two started making their way to the door, causing me to stand up, "Should I come with?"
"No, you stay here." David said, this time not looking me in the eyes, as if looking at me was causing whatever emotions that he was feeling to rage out of control.
Before I could ask anything further, they closed the door behind them, leaving most of us confused and slightly worried besides Frankie and Kevin.
"Wonder what that was all about?" Janelle said while I sat down on the floor, having Penny laying her head on my lap again. Running my hands through her hair again, "Did you see anything maybe?"
Shaking her head slowly, looking equally worried and curious as I was about what had happened, "When I looked down, Ryan already locked his phone."
"But why couldn't Jennifer go with if Coach Richard asked to see them both?" Daytona asked as she finished brushing Janelle's hair. That's what I would like to know too.
By the time I was entering the stadium, I couldn't shake off the thought of what the message would be about. What was it about that got both David and Ryan rounded up like that? What was it and why am I kept in the dark about it?
Got a glimpse of one of Blue Shark team players walking into the changing room that's for teams outside of the campus. The guy was a tall figure with a slim built, close to my skin tone with honey blonde highlights while leaving the roots black.
He's dressed in a tracksuit that's blue, black and sliver with a pair of white and black Nike shoes.
Walking into the changing room where the rest of the team were, already dressed to play like them. I put my duffle bag close to Jimmy and Logan's, having the feeling that either Ivan or one of his friends managed to steal my phone number to give to thirty guys on campus.
One of the reasons why I had to put on a password on my phone for the very first time.
While I was tying my laces and wrapping duct tape around my cleat, most of the guys stepped up to me, saying how much yesterday's training went very well and helped them a lot. Which made me feel good inside that I could help them in some way to play better.
As the team were chatting to each other, across from me, Riley was rolling his left shoulder to the back, showing some discomfort and slight pain. A part of me wants to let him suffer as payback for giving me a hard time since I joined the team, but then I remembered how he kinda stood up to Ivan for me on Wednesday.
Grabbing a half filled tub from my bag which I always carry with me before whistling to Riley, "Heads up, Santiago."
He caught the tub right when he heard me call him, staring at it for a second when I said, "It relaxes the muscle, it'll help your shoulder."
Nodding his head slowly after being still for a moment before finally sitting down. Rubbing some of the ointment gel on the area where he was feeling the most discomfort.
I've been using that gel since the ninth grade whenever I felt stiff or body aches, so I know that it works wonders.
"Hawkins." I turned my head towards Riley when he lightly threw the tub back to me, giving a small nod, "Thanks."
Returning the nod when David and Ryan took their spots beside him, both keeping themselves busy. Tying shoe laces and pulling socks up to cover their shin guards, I tried to catch either one of their attention when Coach Richard got everyone else's.
While he was talking I tried wiggling my fingers under my arm to get David to look at me, Ryan glance at me when I mouthed, 'What's going on?'
'I'll tell you later.' He mouthed back to me which wasn't the answer that I wanted or what I was hoping to hear. And I made sure to make that thought clear when I shook my head and pointed to the ground saying that I want to know now.
When he was about to open his mouth to reply, I heard Coach Richard saying, "And Hawkins will only be playing in second half." Whoa, stop, pause, rewind. I'm playing when now?!
Turning my head so fast to the front that I might have snapped my neck in the process, staring at Coach in confusion and shock as the team regroup to shout its name out before walking out of the room.
Walking up to Coach, catching him before he walked out of the room, "Sorry Coach, why am I benched for today's match?"
"You've been playing the whole week, Jennifer," Coach Richard said almost too quickly, too smoothly as if he was sugar coating something that he doesn't want to tell me.
I can hear it in the tone of his voice which was starting to work on my nerves like a yo-yo toy. "For eighty minutes of the game, you'll rest up before playing the last minute."
Really wanted to fight with him about this when I felt Ryan take me by the hand out of the room to join the rest of the guys for line up.
We stood behind two guys with David standing in front of them while Blue Shark players stood beside us, most of them glanced at our line down from the top to the bottom.
As the last three teams that we've played against, many of them were trying to hit on me as well as get under my skin which I blocked it all out.
Not letting any of it in until I heard the team's Captain who was the guy who I caught a glimpse of before said, "What did you think about the video, McLellan?"
I practically felt Ryan tense up while David's shoulders tighten itself up, but neither of them said anything. I don't even think that none of them breathe as the Captain kept on talking, "It must be my best work. I mean, I know that I've done that trick last season, but I'm pretty sure that compare to the others before that one, it's top five easily. You would probably remember that one better than anyone, right McLellan?"
Those were the last thing that the guy said when we stepped onto the field. While walking, I notice our Captain breathing in deeply and out slowly which means that whatever video that guy was talking about got under David's skin far too easily.
And deadly triggering him in some way or another that he nearly looked like he was close to falling apart.
Easily and smoothly making my way to stand beside him, three seconds he didn't notices me until I slowly put my hand in his. He stopped his breathing to stare at me, I kept my focus forward.
This was me showing that whatever the guy was talking about, right now I'll be his support and sign of strength for now.
When the KAU anthem started, I felt him squeeze my hand. Holding it almost too tight that it might hurt, just showing how much he needed this.
After both anthems ended, none of us clapped our hands, I was about to walk off the field until David stopped me. "You don't understand now, but we're benching you to keep you safe."
"Safe from what exactly, David?" I had to ask, had to know exactly what was going on. The last thing that I want to happen is that this be pushed aside for our talk after the game.
I wish that we could had that conversation before the game from how much free time we had by the time. "Please talk with me."
"I can't tell you right now." David said, causing a small figure of myself inside of my head turn red and hair catching on fire with anger.
But not having the time to argue with him, I nodded my head and dropped his hand like it was a hot coal.
Walking away from him, wanting to scream at him. I couldn't help feeling frustrated with David, with myself for dragging this whole conversation and not just getting it dealt with and have things go back to how it was.
With a couple of changes, of course, but seriously this was becoming very unnecessary now.
Before I walked off the field, I quickly ran to Ryan who was close to the goal post on the left field, grabbing his arm, turning him around to face me, "Did you tell them about Golden Angels?"
Without needing me to explain further what I was talking about, Ryan shook his head, looking almost offended that I even asked, "No one else know about the Coach from Golden Angels being here today."
"Then why the hell am I benched? Is this David's way of getting back at me or something?" I was so frustrated that my mind was jumping to many reasons to why I could possibly be branched for.
Really not liking the idea of not being allowed to play most of the game for whatever reason that I'm unware of.
The last part might have annoyed Ryan a little bit, because his face became very much serious and open, "David didn't suggested to branch you for first half instead of the whole game, because of the tension between the two of you's. That's the very last thing on his mind right now, he's only protecting you from something that's much worst than his ego getting injured by you, Jennifer."
I've been hearing that a lot today, the part about David 'protecting me' from something. What exactly was he protecting me from, what was it about this game that's so dangerous that I suddenly needed protection from? "You're not gonna tell me, are you?"
Looking behind me where I'm sure that David was staring right at us at this moment, because Ryan said, "It'll be best if he told you everything that's going on, Jennie. And if not, then I will later."
Shaking my head and groaned out of irritation for all of this crap that these boys were playing around with, unnecessary crap that they were displaying right now.
By the last fifteen minutes of the first half, the Sharks had two goals on the scoreboard.
The guys remembered what me and the girls have taught them yesterday, but they're struggling a little bit in some areas which is fixable.
Not being able to sit still on the branch, I would scream a few instructions to most of the team which helped defensively and stopping the Sharks flow.
In doing so, the team were able to score a late goal by Riley when first half ended. Back in the changing room, I grabbed Ryan by the arm, pulling him to the back of the group. Keeping my voice down when I almost demanded, "Show me the video that Shark's Captain was talking about."
"Jennie, it's just a video of you being the target of their Captain making a tackle that can injury you badly." Ryan just said what was going on without having me beg or plea. What really caught me were two things, me being Blue Shark's target and they're planning to make a dangerous tackle on me that can lead to serious injury.
I would be lying if I had told you that I wasn't scared or frighten y the news at all, I've been a target to most teams in high school along with Tyler, Roselyn, Carina and Taylen.
We've been injured before, but none of them have ever been a serious injury which scares me even more.
But with every target, there's always a reason behind it all, the main motive to have such plans, "Do you know why they have me as their target?"
Ryan licked his lips which he does whenever he doesn't want to tell you anything, but he saw that I wasn't going to stop asking until he told everything, "Some of the players including Shark's Captain has been watching the last two games that you've played and they believe that you're a threat to their team winning the tournament this season."
As if the thought of what it might be wasn't scary enough, my dumb, scared ass decided, "I want to see it."
"Jennifer, are you sure?" Ryan stared at me deep in my eyes, wanting to know if I'm one hundred percent sure that I really wanted to see this injury that might be the same thing that I'm picturing in my mind. "This isn't some Hollywood movie magic video, ok. This injury happened last season and the guy who that jackass injured, could only play by the end of it, even though his team didn't make it to the finalise."
He just had to add even more wood to the fire at this point, but I decided that it's better to see it than rather wondering how truly serious this injury is.
Nodding my head, shaking the fear off and preparing myself for what I'm about to see until, "Hawkins, Coracle, pay attention!!"
Automatically we both turned to the front, Ryan hiding his phone behind his back while I kept my hands in front of me when we notices David staring, "Yes Coach!" Thank you, Coach Richard.
We both stayed quiet for a moment as Coach Richard continued speaking before Ryan said in a low voice, "The Captain who was talking smack to David is known to tackle recklessly whenever he plays. He dislocated the guy's ankle from last season. Two years before that, he broke a guy's leg when trying to get the ball back from him."
Breathing in slowly, trying my best not to let what I've heard been seen on my face, having a player like that on your team is a serious thing. Players who injury others just for fun and because, they believe that they can, shouldn't be anywhere on the field. And the thought that they have their eye on you to tackle like that bring a whole different type of fear in.
Fear that you might never play soccer the same again, might never dance the way you used to again, it would be like losing your ability of walking.
To lose a part of yourself, because of a serious injury has always been the one thing that I always try my best to avoid.
Then I realise something, something that was far above me being benched. David and Ryan hadn't told the team about me being Blue Shark's target, neither has Coach Richard.
They're letting everyone else play this game wither if there's a chance that someone or anyone's a target.
Like playing in mist, you don't know what's coming or what you're walking, playing yourself into in this case.
Pushing every bit of fear that I was feeling down a dark hole as I stepped forward.
Walking through the group of players until I was standing in front, "Coach, I want to play in second half."
Coach Richard was busy explaining a new tactic that was similar to one that my team and I used to play back in high school. It's a smart method, though the finishing can be a bit tricky when you haven't practiced it as much as we have done. "You only get to play at the eighty minutes."
"The Sharks won't wait for me until eighty minutes and they will injury any player from our team to make sure that I'm on that field." I know that what I was doing would cause the team to question the leadership of Coach, David and Ryan, but they had the right to know what's going on. Sometimes even the most perfect leadership has to be shaken up to discover any sign of imperfection in its system in order to prosper.
From the corner of my eyes, I could see David staring at Ryan down with venom while most of the guys were mummering under their breath about what I've said.
Coach Richard was about to say something to calm them down to uplift their spirits, he might have even dismiss me and my request to play second half. Not very likely that last part, but it's possible.
"I've been a target before many times, Coach Richard. And I know how to handle them, instead of trying to play safe, why not use this as a tactic of turning the table on Blue Sharks?" What I've put on the table caused everyone to become quiet, listening to what I have to say.
This idea that I have inside of my head is dangerous in a sense, yet it's the best thing to not only keep everyone safe, because it's more important than this game and the tournament. "If we take control and possession in second half, we can have them focus more on trying to stopping us from scoring instead of the illegal tackle."
For a moment, Coach Richard was thinking what I've laid on the table, a plan that's both safe and guarantees a victory. David was whispering in his Uncle's ear, probably trying to change his mind on something that's much better than what they were doing the one thing that I've asked him not to do. Treating me like a princess in a team of Knights.
Five seconds later, the referee popped into the room saying, "Three more minutes before second half starts."
Once the door closed after the referee popped out, Coach Richard stepped away from David, staring at everyone, "Listen up, people. In second half, we'll push forward, grab possession on the ball and score as many goals to win today."
"What about Hawkins, Coach?" Riley asked from the back, not putting any emphasis on my name or sounding bored saying it. For the first time, he's not acting like some spoiled boy and treating me like I was some clueless girl on the team.
Coach Richard looked into my eyes when he said, "Benjamin will come off and Jennifer will play after the first ten minutes into second half."
David may not have liked the idea that I will be playing in the beginning of second half, but he was only the Captain of the team, his Uncle Richard is the Coach of the team which meant that his words out rules his.
That must be the reason why he didn't argue on the decision that has been made any further, showing that he did have good sense after all.
The minute we were back onto the field, I started warming up. Afterwards I started stretching which was when David stood in front of me, with a very serious expression, "Tell Uncle Richard that you have stomach cramps."
"No." I said, reaching to the left, bending my body slightly to the side for five minutes before bending to the right when he said, "Tell him that your periods just started."
"That happened last week." I lied, not wanting to talk to him any further about this. It was ridiculous how David was thinking of all the possible excuses that he wants me to use to keep me from getting on the field. "Tell him that you have crumps in your legs. You might have to sit this game out."
Straighten myself up before raising my leg upward while going onto my tip toes which caused a reaction of clapping and cheering from both the crowd and the Blue Sharks' players, "I think my legs are perfectly fine, thank you, Captain."
"Stand up." David bit the words out in a tight voice, his hands forms balls of fists. His face became angry while turning slightly red, displaying the perfect picture of anger and frustration that I was feeling.
Straighten myself again, taking a step forward, mirroring his expression with my own picture of anger and frustration, "Now you know what it feels like to be ignored when you're talking to someone who was supposed to be there for you.
Isn't it nerve wreaking to have someone choice to not listen to you and just do whatever they please and let you feel like you're screaming your head off to a brick wall."
"Anela." He said, his accent was thick and raw when saying my second name, as if he was holding himself back from losing his control over his anger. A part of me wants him to lose control, to kinda push him further into his anger just to let him understand how I feel about everything that had happened today.
"William." I matched his tone, his pitch and strong stare, besides feeling that weird, annoying feeling in my gut when I called him by his second name for the first time.
We stood like this, staring each other down with so much fire that we can burn the ground that we were standing on. Causing even more tense between us than it already is which was something that should have solved a long time ago.
I was already burning with anger for David having me branched without telling me about being Shark's target, but now I was fuming with rage that he's trying to keep me off the field.
So many words, so many thoughts were flying through my mind that I wanted to scream at him badly, do anything that can get through his thick, stubborn head.
But there was a game that the team needed to finish and Diego was calling David from the field, "Your team is waiting on you to finish the match, Captain McLellan."
It was the very first time that I've ever called him that, most of the time I just say 'Captain', but right now I was so filled of rage that his last name just rolled off my tongue.
Which for some reason felt weak just like my knees after I said that, causing that strange and annoying feeling in my gut to spin out of control whenever I speak to him in a certain way like it did last night at Rockstar when we made that bet.
After I said that, David inhale deep before turning around to run onto the field, going to centre field to start play. While watching the first three minutes of second half, I kept on stretching and warming up, counting the minutes down until it's time to get onto the field.
During that first three minutes, our defence line became like the Great Wall of China, strong, untouchable and unbreakable. Our players pushed the Sharks back and once they were against the rope, the Knights attack fearlessly.
Logan, Diego and Timmy nearly used the same tactic that Tyler, Roselyn and I are known for. Where the three of us would have possession on the ball equally before one of us would score. But in this case, the boys were almost playing this game of hot potato where they tease the Sharks' defenders and midfielders before one of the back heeled the ball behind them.
Then out of the blue, Jimmy got possession while being on side by the way, and smashed the ball into the bottom corner of the goalpost.
It was incredible, well thought and brilliantly planned!!! That goal set the whole stadium on fire by how loud the home crowd roared and who could blame them?
When the Sharks tried breaking the tie, our defences held them back before assisting the ball to the forwarders. Riley handed the ball to Jimmy who got past two midfielders, then pushed forward with him and David as support.
There was three defenders held their ground, watching our three Knight players and while our players were running towards goal, another player from the Sharks were chasing them down along with his other teammates.
Watching Jimmy passing the ball to Riley back and forth between the two, I notices something that I don't think anyone caught on.
Shark's Captain, the tall guy who I saw when I got here was doing some hand signals with his left hand, he was hitting his thigh while making one, four, four. What does that even mean?
Riley, Jimmy and David were only a hand reach away from entering the box with the Shark's players running after them, my brain was working hard putting the pieces together. Already solving the one puzzle being a number, 'eighteen', the last one which is a bigger one meant something more than having some kind of cramps.
He's hitting his thigh with a fist, just above the knee, one, four and four was for the number eighteen.
That's when my eyes quickly zoned onto the back of all three players team shirts, Riley's number is twenty five, David's seven and -
"JIMMY, WATCH OUT!!!" I screamed the loudest as the boys entered the box, but it was too late. Jimmy had already pass the ball back to Riley before the centre defender slide tackled him into the ground just above his knee.
Before the referee blew his whistle, I was already running onto the field, rushing to my friend's side with the first aid team running with me.
David was screaming in the player's face who made the tackle, half of our team including Ryan had to distance them apart from each other while the other part was surrounding Jimmy. Pushing through them all before kneeling next to him, his face was wearing a mask of pain with tears rolling down his cheeks.
Immediately the first aid got to work assisting him, grabbing his hand with my heart screaming out for the pain that my friend was enduring, "Jimmy, you're gonna be ok."
"It hurts." He groan in pain, when I looked down at his knees already knowing what had happened. The kneecap wasn't in its usual place, sitting on the left side of his leg which is the most painful injury to ever bear. Trust me, I know what it feels like.
I kept my face unreadable when I turn back to him, he tried leaning on his elbow to see his leg, but I gently held him down, shaking my head, "You need to lay still, Jimmy."
"It hurts." He said, his voice breaking in pain which caused me to only squeeze his hand a little bit harder to comfort him. As much as I wanted to do more, I couldn't.
Looking over my shoulder where the referee was speaking to both David and the defender who tackled Jimmy, I saw two cards in his hands, one yellow, the other one red. Turning to David, he raised the yellow card for him before showing it to the Shark's defender then the red one.
As I watched him walk off the field, I was burning the back of his head with white hot fire while our home supporters booed him. Some even went as far as throwing their drinks and empty chip packets at him as he walked through the tunnel.
Turning back to Jimmy who was slowly being placed on a starchier, I quickly stood up with the first aid team as they lifted him up from the ground, "Which hospital are you taking him?"
"Luke Medical Hospital, it's closer to campus." The guy who was like the leader of the first aid team answered as he and the rest of the team carried Jimmy towards the tunnel.
Hearing the name of the hospital that they were taking him gave me some kind of comfort, knowing where he's going has a certainty about someone who I know is working today.
Squeezing his hand to get his attention for a moment as we moved, "My sister, Dr Rebecca Huffman is working at trauma unit today and she's gonna take care of you."
He squeezed my hand back with a sincere smile before it turned into a guilty one as he said, "I knew about Shark's plan of injuring you, I got into a fight with the guy who tackled me before the game to get their attention off from you, even though Coach Richard branched you. It was part of our plan to keep you safe."
Two key points in his confession caused me to become cold all over my body. The first one was that Jimmy knew about me being the target for Blue Sharks. And the second one was that his injury being part of some kind of plan to keep me safe.
This was something that I never want to happen to anyone, regardless if I'm some target to other teams or not, I never asked anyone of Knights' teammates to injury themselves for me. All of this information was causing my mind to run around in circles, begging me to wake up from this really bad dream that I was having.
"Who else came up with this plan?" I asked him, needing to know who came up with this stupid and reckless idea. Who's the idoit who decided to make my friend a crash dummy in today's game, thinking that is was all ok, because they convinced themselves that they were keeping me safe from getting tackled.
Jimmy's guilty expression turned into one where he was trying to have a poker face, but we both know that whenever he's under pressure from keeping a secret, he breaks.
Without needing to say anything, all I had to do was squeeze his hand tight with a strong stare before he finally spit the truth out,
"David didn't wanted me to tell you, I'm sorry."
We were only five centre metres away from stepping off the field when I dropped my hand from his. I stood nearly lifeless, watching the first aid team carry Jimmy off the field and through the tunnel. Still couldn't believe what I've just heard what he told me.
My friend is on his way to the hospital with a dislocated knee which could have a torn ACL or a torn MCL, maybe even worst. My friend could be suffering a serious injury and might not be able to play soccer again, all because of me.
I haven't realized that I was standing so still until I felt a cold and warm hand touch my shoulder, "You're ok, Ariel?"
I pushed his hand off from me as I turned towards him and before I knew it, I pushed him so hard that he nearly stumbled to the back. Staring at me with wide eyes and shook, his mouth opened to say something, but my back was facing him already.
Running to the side of the field where Coach Richard was standing, glancing between me and behind me, "Put me on, Coach."
Raising an eyebrow towards me and spoke this sort of way that won't upset me further, but also tries to calm me down as well, "You can only play after the first ten minutes of this half, Hawkins."
"That time limit has passed during Jimmy's injury which means that I can play." I reminded Coach Richard, trying my best to stand still while we were having this conversation.
My mind was running miles and miles ahead of time, ideas and tactics were burning inside of my skull, wanting to be laid out onto the field. "And I would like to do something during my time on the field, with your permission, Coach."
For a second, Coach Richard glanced to the corner of his eye where the Blue Sharks stood surrounding their Coach who looked towards us.
Our team were further away from where we stood, before stepping closer with his hand covering his mouth, "What do you want to do, Jennifer?"
Stepping slightly forward, coping his movement and actions while lowering my voice as I said, "I want to limit Sharks' teammates on the field, they already have lost one man, because of his illegal tackle. But it's the wrong person, their Captain is telling the team who they have to tackle and how to tackle our teammates. He has done it with hand signals before they injured Jimmy."
As I was explaining all of this to Coach, he would glance to the Sharks', watching them closely before turning to look at me, "You're thinking of getting Blue Shark's Captain to get a red card by tackling you."
It wasn't much of a question, rather more like a classification of the plan that I have in mind. Nodding my head slightly before Coach Richard continued, "What you're planning on to do is something that can either work well enough or very badly, Hawkins. You don't know any of these players well enough to try something that's not only careless, but highly reckless. You might get injured horribly and I'm not willing to let that happen."
"Sadly your nephew doesn't really care about the team's wellbeing like you, Coach Richard." I said honestly without holding back from the bitterness and anger that I was feeling after what I've heard from Jimmy.
Looking back on the field, I notices everyone standing in the box for a penalty which we got, because of the tackle inside of the box. And by the looks of it, David was the who will be taking it.
Turning away from him when I felt that huge, uncontrolled wave of rage raising up from inside of me after hearing that he had part in the plan that has gotten Jimmy injured.
Even Coach Richard didn't watch the penalty being scored, because we both know that his nephew is talented and skilled enough to receive a third goal for the team.
Staring me dead in the eyes when he said, "Whatever plan you have bubbling up inside of your head is not only gonna be a risk to the team, but also to yourself if you either don't time it properly or you misstep somewhere. And the last thing that I want is to have another talented player get injured, do you understand, Hawkins?"
The tone that he was speaking to me was a tone that someone would use whenever they would speak to someone younger than them with understanding. He wasn't talking me down or disciplining me, but rather making me understand clearly what I'm about to do.
Nodding my head, staying quiet in case he wants to continued speaking.
Yet after David scored the penalty, Coach Richard whistle loudly to the referee who turned to the side of the field.
Raising his hand, making a circle motion above his head, by the time, the referee blew on his whistle, he shouted, "Benjamin, come off!!"
Benjamin was clapping all of the teammates' hands before running to the edge of the field where I stood beside Coach Richard, as he was running closer, I heard, "When you get on that field, you have to do three things for me, Hawkins."
Turning my head to him, he was watching Benjamin get closer and closer as he was speaking to me, "One, you score a goal that will make the Shark's team jealous. Two, your plan mustn't just be smart, but also careful."
Benjamin was still far from reaching us when Coach Richard final turn to look at me in the same way he would probably look at a little child. Although a part of me felt like his stare is the same one that he would use on David, "And finally, whatever you do on this field, make sure that you scare that prick of a Captain that none of them, not even him would ever try targeting our team again."
Inhaling a breath of relief for the green light that I've received from Coach Richard before nodding my head, "I'll make him believe that he's playing against the Boogeyman."
A soft scoff was heard as a small smile grew on his face when Benjamin finally stood in front of me. Clapping my hand before leaning towards my ear to whisper, "Good luck, Hawkins."
"Thank you, Ben." I gently patted his back before running back onto the field, moving to the position that Jimmy was playing in which was right wing. As I was waiting for the referee to blow his whistle to start the game, I glanced over the crowd, letting myself to drink in their energy and excitement for our team's chance of winning.
Before I turn away from them, I spotted one person wearing this grey and black T-shirt that had a soccer ball that has been set on fire printed on it and a worn out navy blue Nike baseball cap. Dad.
When he spotted me looking at him, he gave the biggest smile before waving towards me, smiling and waving back to him before I heard the whistle.
As David and Timmy was passing the ball back and forth between each other, I took a moment to look across the field, studying the opponent team. Noticing that Shark's Captain is a left defender and not a right defender and that he can't turn fast on his right as he can on his left.
With this in mind, I grabbed possession of the ball before the Shark's centre midfielder could get through the field. Zipping and zagging past most of their players before passing the ball to Logan who was matching my speed, letting him run past me so that I could be face to face with Shark's Captain.
Managing to whistle for his pass and when he did, the Captain started running forward, once he was close enough, I stopped in my tracks. Letting him watch the ball, slowly moving with the ball, faking to go left, allowing him to open his legs just enough to kick it between his legs and running around him from the right.
Struggling to turn around fast enough, I blotted to the goalpost, letting the other defender try to stop me, only to have them slip past as I fake going left, running through the gap and shoot.
The goalkeeper could barely brush his fingertips across the ball as it flies into the left side, the one side that he doesn't always dive in, maybe because of some injury that he might have suffered.
Once the ball was in, I ran to the crowd for the first time, standing in front of them, raising my left arm above my head, making the same hand signals, shouting, "ONE, FOUR, FOUR, POWER!!!"
I shouted those words at least three times before the crowd started chanting them back, it was my way of dedicating the goal to Jimmy as well as letting Shark's Captain know that I was and am watching him.
Turning around, I saw him staring at the crowd who was chanting with out campus band who started playing a beat to match the chant with their drums.
I saw the slight fear and worry in his eyes without needing to stand closer. Good, you should be afraid.
When we stared played again, I let Logan run into the same spot that I ran to before scoring the fourth goal. But instead of scoring the same way that I had, he tried going around the Shark's Captain by trying to out run him from his right.
Which only led to him stealing the ball and passing it to his centre defender.
The centre defender was about to kick the ball out until I quickly ran past him, grabbing the ball and shooting to the right of the goalpost.
Letting the keeper block it, gaining us a corner kick which was fine, because that was part of my plan.
I was gonna make myself appear like a ghost to the Shark's Captain, whenever the ball's close to him and he's about to defend or assist his teammates, I will be there.
Blocking and stealing possession from him, by the end of this second half, he's gonna be wishing that I was still on the bench.
We missed the chance of scoring again by the corner, keeping the Shark's on their toes for the next thirty minutes of the second half. Keeping possession on the ball, using their mistakes and short comings against them before second half fell on the eighty minute of the game.
One of the Shark's players managed to get through our defender's wall, only to have his shoot on goal blocked. Ryan held the ball in his hand before kicking it into centre field where Timmy picked it up, passing it to Riley who then passed it to Logan.
I'm running towards the box, not really focusing on what or who's in front of me and being onside.
I managed to run pass the Shark's Captain as Logan fired a high ball towards the area that I was. By the speed that it was falling down, my first touch won't be an easy one.
I was very aware that David and Diego are in the box and are both closer to score a goal.
As the ball got closer and closer, I jumped to header it into their pass while making the mistake of closing my eyes before hearing one of them scream.
I felt two things hitting my forehead before falling to the ground, for a moment I couldn't open my eyes, but I was aware that I was still breathing.
I might have been lying on the ground for at least a minute or something, hearing an almost blurry voice calling out, "Anela, Anela, can you hear me? Anela, open your eyes, please!"
The voice sounded like it was afraid, worried and a little bit upset, but it was pushing all of those things back. As if deciding that none of those things were important, it sounded desperate, that if whoever was talking could see my eyes, to hear me speak, then everything will be ok.
I could move my body slowly after a short minute when my eyes finally opened and what I saw kneeling over me was a very surprising.
David was kneeling on the right, staring down at me with this stunned face before seeing another person kneeling on the other side of me, "Dad, what are you doing on the field?"
After hearing me speak, the worry that was hanging from his face was lifted with relief before leaning forward to kiss my forehead, "Try sitting up for me, Aloha 'ia."
Slowly I lifted myself up onto my elbows before sitting straight up with some help from a very eager and fast David. That's when I saw the Knights and Shark's players surrounding someone while the rest was holding two players away from each other. Being held back was Logan and Shark's Captain who the referee called to talk to him, clicking the memory into my mind about what had happened.
Quickly getting back onto my feet which caused both David and Dad to become like nervous chickens watching their farmer walking around with an axe, "Who touched the ball first?"
"Are you serious, Ariel?!" David asked, his shock was replaced with slight anger for what I was asking. "You got knocked out by Markson, you were unconscious for nearly two minutes and the first thing you asked is 'who touched the ball first'?!"
I was nearly on my feet, ignoring what David was saying beside the whole unconscious thing. Only pushing that information to the side of my mind for a moment, needing to know who had possession of the ball, me or 'Markson'? "It's not the first time that I got kicked in the face, now who had the ball first?"
"It doesn't matter who had the ball first," David argued with me while Dad helped me to stand on my feet. Feeling slightly dizzy for a second which I didn't say to either one of them. Or else I will be forced to wall off the field without having my question answered. "You got injured and have to get off the field now."
Once I was standing again, I started walking forward to the crowd in front of me. Leaving Dad and David stay behind me while two of the first aid members quickly do a check up on me.
Answering almost all of their questions 'no', I watched the referee who was talking to Markson before raising a red card above his head, sending him off, answering my question.
I touched the ball first and he tried stealing it away from me, knowing that he had no possession on the ball at all.
And due to the high leg and serious tackle that he committed; he might not be able to play more than just three games for the latest. Check mate.
As he was walking off the field, Markson looked over his shoulder, looking at me who didn't even try hiding my smile.
Venom was shooting through his stare before turning away, walking even more angrily than before. With the home crowd booing him twice more and louder than they had for his teammate who also got a red card.
After Logan got a yellow card, the referee walked up to both me and David, "Are you ok, Hawkins?"
Nodding my head before he explained that we have a free kick for the last minutes of the game due to injury time.
For the last two games, I was asked to take the free kicks while David took it for the others.
As the referee was drawing the white line where the ball has to stand, Dad quickly pulled me into a bear hug, "You're sure you alright, Jennifer?"
"Yes Dad, I'm fine." I reassured him as we pulled away from each other. Staring straight into my eyes with a serious look which I've seen many times before, "Next time you get kicked in the face, you'll be grounded for a month."
And he's not kidding, the last time that I've got injured on a game, I had to miss out on a party, because I was grounded for three weeks.
So, the light chuckle that I would have let out was quickly shoved down to the back of my throat. "Yes Dad."
His eyes soften a little bit before giving me one last kiss on my forehead, then walked off the field. The referee was drawing a line where two Shark players had to stand while the wall stood behind them from the right.
I walked back to the spot where the free kick is taking place when a very angry yet blank faced David stood in front of me, "You're not taking this free kick."
"Fine, I'll run over the ball and let you take it."
"No." He said very strongly, firm. His expression was making it very hard to read him. This was a first, because even when he wears a blank expression, I would still be able to know exactly what he's feeling, what he's thinking.
So, why is he closing himself off? "You're going off the field right now."
Raising an eyebrow towards him, feeling that same rage from Wednesday bubbling up from inside of me, "The game is close to finishing and you want to sub me off?"
"No subbing, you're just gonna go off the field and let the team and I finish the rest of the game." He said which made no sense at all. Why would he want to sub me when there's only five minutes left of the game and be with ten players? "I'm not subbing off, David."
"Get off the field, Anela." His accent was thick and strong when he said my name again, a sign of his control slowly slipping away from him. Which he might been having some trouble to control during the last minutes of the second half.
I was about to fight with him about this, argue with him until I started thinking. Noticing that the free kick is meant to be taken from the left side of the box, the ball would need to be swerve into the net. That meant that this kick has to be taken by a left footed player.
David's strong foot is his right and not his left, I can score with both of mine, but can't curl the ball into the net with my left foot.
Without saying anything else, I quickly ran to the wall, grabbing one person by his wrist.
Pulling him to David who stared between us in complete confusion and a bit of shock, couldn't blame him, "Riley is taking the free kick."
Both him and Riley stared at me when they both said, "What?!"
Shrugging my shoulders before pointing out the obvious to them, "He's left footed, he can score the fifth goal. Since this free kick is from a thirty seven angle which is very hard for a right foot to curl the ball into the back of the net, he can make the shoot easily. I've seen him done it during training and I know that he can score the goal from here much better than you and I could even try."
Turning Riley to look at me, placing my hands on top of his shoulders, staring him straight into the eyes when I said, "You want the spotlight without me taking it from you, this is your chance. Good luck, Santiago, you got this."
Once all of those things were said, I walked back to the line, standing between Timmy and Logan. David and Riley exchange a few words before setting the ball up.
Our Captain raised his hand up before running to kick it.
For that second, I thought that he was gonna take the goal and ruin our chances of winning a game with more than three goals.
Until I saw him lightly back kick the ball away from the white line before Riley bang his left foot against it, letting it fly and curve through the sky.
It was like watching a bolt skipping through the clouds, not touching any of the Shark's players before hitting the back of the net.
Causing all of us to run towards Riley and David with the home crowd screaming their heads off from behind us.
Most of Shark's players didn't want to take our hands, because they've lost two of their own during the game and have lost badly. Not minding their sour attitude as the team and I made our way to the changing room, chanting some of the cheers that the cheerleaders have been screaming and chanting during most of the game.
The room was buzzing with joy and excitement, in that moment I could really feel what Ryan was talking about being the team having hope again.
There was this atmosphere filled of it and it was intoxicating, I never want this moment, this day to ever end.
While talking to Logan, I felt someone tap lightly on my shoulder, finding Riley standing behind me with this almost shy look on his face which was a first, "Just wanna say good game today, Hawkins."
Throughout this whole week, I've never would have thought that Riley would surprise me. Wednesday, he kinda stood up to Ivan before I got into a fight with him. He hasn't been rude or spoken to me with a close, narrowed mind and he actually gave me a compliment on the game today.
A part of me wonders if it's all an act of his, pretend to be nice to me before he stabs me in the back or something. Yet another part of me thinks that maybe, just maybe we might become friends. Who knows?
Offering him a small smile and was about to return the compliment when a hot headed David stepped between the two of us, "Have you lost all of your common senses?!"
Scoffing at him for interrupting a very pleasant conversation between me and Riley, "Have you always been this rude?"
"What were you thinking getting into a tackle like that?! You could have gotten seriously injured today; do you know that?" David ignored what I've said, looking like he was beyond angry and frustrated to worry about having manners. Which isn't an excuse to walk into a conversation that he wasn't part of.
"Yeah, I knew that." I admitted, matching his tone of voice again, yet this time my anger was heightening itself up.
Forcing itself out to be known to him and everyone else in the room, sick of being pushed aside and not being allowed to express itself and my frustration. "But I took the chance of limiting a treat to not only to this team, but also to every other team who are schedule to play against the Blue Shark. And I would have done it over and over again, if it meant ensuring the safety of me and my team."
When David scoffed, it wasn't playful or light hearted like it usually is. This time it was cold and heartless, "Your team. Two days ago you brought your high school soccer girls' team, calling them 'your team', now after playing with us, not them, we're suddenly your team."
"Two days ago was training, it wasn't a match that allows the team to secure everyone's chances of playing in the tournament." I argued with him, becoming more angry than ever for David behaving like an actual jealous fangirl. Who just found out that he pop star singer slash fictional boyfriend is dating some super model over my choice of words. "And as long as I play for this campus with this team, it is my team. These guys are part of my team and I will not stand aside and let them hurt themselves or let them get injured for whatever reason wither I'm a target to one team or all of them!"
"No one let themselves get injured!" David said frustratedly, his voice was nearly bouncing off the wall while his face was becoming more and more red than before.
And if I could, I would have turned just as red as him, my voice would have sounded like it's plugged into a roundhouse speaker and let my thoughts on everything that has happened today known.
I was standing on tiptoes by the edge of a cliff for the statement that he has made which we both isn't true at all, "Jimmy got into a fight with one of the Shark's players, he made himself a target. And as his Captain, you didn't do anything to prevent that tackle from happening. You just didn't care about his safety or well being and let it happen which I'm pretty sure that isn't what Carson taught you when he took you under his wing."
I knew that I hit the needle on its head when I brought Carson up by how David inhale quickly and sharply. His tone of voice became darker and more angry than before, "You don't get to talk about him, you never met or knew him, so you don't get to talk about Carson to me, Anela."
I knew that I should have dropped it, I should have stopped before I make things even worst and sour between the two of us, but in that moment, I wasn't thinking about the situation between me and David. I wasn't even thinking about me.
I was thinking about the team, thinking about Jimmy, about Logan, Timmy, Chris, Eric, Diego, Benjamin, even Riley, I was thinking about them all. "As Captain of this team, it is your responsibility to ensure that no matter what happened on the field or any other field, that the team's safety and well being will be taken care of. As Captain of this team, it is your responsibility to always correct them whenever they make a mistake or have done something wrong, regardless if it's a matter that's inside or outside of the team.
"As Captain of this team, it is your responsibility to be brutally honest to every single one of us, wither it's about our performance on or off the field. And shouldn't look the other way, because you're either friends with them or just don't give a damn, and just wanna look good to everyone else.
"As Captain of this team, it is your responsibility to be honest about who's being target by whom and why. Not keeping your mouth and letting anyone take matters into their own hands, because that's not how a team work. This isn't some video game universe where people are allowed to get hurt and injured for each other, because they have five lives left.
"As Captain of this team, it is your responsibility to be an example to everyone, to be compassionate, selfless and respectful. If you can't do any of those things, be any one of those qualities of a real Captain, then maybe you weren't meant to lead this team at all!!"
Some of the guys exhaled before coughing awkwardly for how I was challenging David, how I was calling him out, but something told me that if I hadn't done it, then no one will.
I don't even know if his Uncle or Ryan would ever do it, besides the fact that he was nearly kicked off the field before I came to campus, there's still a lot of work that he has to work on.
Which I was shining a light on and wasn't finished just yet, "Jimmy got injured today, because you didn't care about him or his safety. You don't even care if his injury is serious enough to keep him from playing the next few games with us, that's if his recovery goes well.
You just care about yourself and looking good, because of that attitude, we've lost a very good player, probably the best player this team has ever had."
My anger felt like it was dancing and flying through my mouth, spitting out every thought, big or small into the air. Wanting to make sure that each one of them have been made known to David who has stayed quiet and still during my time of speaking.
His expression may be blank and twisted with anger, but I could see through his eyes that he wants to blow up just as much as I have.
Before I could speak any further, taking the opportunity of my slit second of silence, David cut in, "In a week before the 4th July, we'll be playing against the Thunderdogs who has been champions of this tournament for the last five years with their Captain Android Grayson."
I knew about Android being part of the soccer boys' team Thunderdogs, though him making it for Captain of the team was bit of a surprise. But I'm not convince that he got the armband due his talent and performance on the field.
If I know him well enough as I do, than I know that his Dad had somehow persuaded the Coach.
Just like he tried to coax my Dad into making him Captain of the soccer team that he's coaching at my old high school.
Though what I was about to hear next might be more ridiculous and gaslighting, "For that game, you will be benched and you won't be allowed to training with me and the team, Anela." Are you kidding me?!
"No, NO!! You don't get to choice who can and can't train or play with the team, you're the Captain, not the Coach!" I was beyond annoyed now, I couldn't believe what this guy was telling me, what he was doing.
For a moment I would have thought that he's doing this, because of seeing me as some weak, spineless girl who needs protection all of the time. But right now, it feels so much more than that. "You can't keep me from playing against Android's team, that's not fair!"
"You're being benched for that game, because you're not ready to play against them or with this team, Anela!" David argued harder and almost violently with me on this. Everything about this argument feels different in some way, as if something bad is about to happen or be said which I don't really understand. "You're being benched, because you have been riskless, foolish, stubborn and you refused to follow direct orders from the team Captain who is me. And as a team member of this team, what I say on the field is to be followed, regardless of whatever mood you're in."
"I'm not and will not be forced to sit on the side line of this upcoming game, just because you can't handle having your precious ego bruised by a team member who's only telling you the truth." I was going to fight to play this game, not because it's Android, but because this is my team and I know that they are the better and stronger opponent than Thunderdogs. "I can help the team win against the Thunderdogs, because I know their strength and weaknesses. Everything about that team, I know from the back of my head."
"Then how come you're no longer with Android anymore, Anela?" That question alone stilled the fire in my mouth, stilling everything single atom in my body. That bad feeling that I was feeling became like a deadline the second David said that, letting me become like an ice cube. "You say that you know the Thunderdogs and how they work, even though you've only dated their Captain for a couple of months before breaking up with him when you were in high school and he started college."
I was about to open my mouth to say something, not to argue any further with David, but to ask him to stop talking before he says anything that he will regret later. But the slight chance that I had of speaking was cut off when he said,
"You claim that you know him, yet you didn't even know or never notice that he's nothing, but a horny sleazeball who gave you false promises that your first time with him would be something out of a fairy tale which you foolishly and naively fell for.
Only to realize too late that he has lost interest in you and was banging your best friend behind your back, because she was more easy to sleep with."
Have you ever felt like you were suddenly falling after hearing about a family member's passing or when someone breaks your heart?
As you are being dropped, you feel like your entire being is being broken down into little pieces without your control?
Well, that's what I was feeling, I was falling down a dark hole while having my whole self be broken a part until I become nothing than ashes.
In that moment, all I wanted to do was hurt him, my hands and body was burning to hit him, to smack him the face, but as much as I wanted to, I couldn't.
Hearing Dad's voice at the back of my head, telling me to hurt him in another way that will sting more than a slap.
Listening to that voice, I turn to my open duffle bag, grabbed my black and gold Athena's Soccer Girls' T-shirt that I would always take with me to the games as a 'good luck charm'. Taking off the Knights' T-shirt without a care that I was standing in a room filled of guys, it's not like they haven't seen breasts or a black sport bra before, then I threw my black and gold T-shirt over my head.
Throwing my duffle bag over my shoulder, already wearing Nike shoes with my cleats already inside of it. Turning to face David, placing my hand psalm flat against his chest with the Knights' T-shirt, pulling my hand away. I let the top fall down his chest which he caught as I walked away, keeping my eyes glued to the floor.
Not looking at anyone in the face as I made my way to the door which opened before I could grab the handle.
Coach Richard was stepping into the room with a huge smile on his face, softly chuckling until he notices me stepping out, saying as greeting, "Good game, Coach."