His arms were around me in seconds. It felt as if it had been an eternity since I'd felt his touch and I didn't realize how much I had missed it till now.
"You've no idea how badly I've missed you." I couldn't speak. All I could do was hug him tighter and pray this moment wouldn't end. After a few moments of feeling his arms around me, I leaned back and punched him in the shoulder.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Everyone is worried. You went completely off grid and you forgot your phone. Tannar was two hairs away from calling the police." he sighed and took two small steps back.
"I know. I messed up. All I could think about after I posted that video was coming to find you and speaking face to face. You're not just some girl, Sam. I'm sorry it came out that way." he took a seat on the well-loved recliner and placed his head in his hands. "In fact, you're the only girl who has caught my heart since everything went down with Ilsa." I knelt down in front of him and took his hands in my own.
"I want to be 100% transparent with you, okay?" he nodded. "A few years ago I dated Jacob. You know of him but I never explicitly told you in detail what happened or why it took so long to recover from it. I met him when all I cared about were relationships. So typically, I settled. At first he treated me how I imagined boys treated girls when they were together. 11 months later he called me one night and decided to break things off. I was gutted. I didn't know what I had done and to this day I still don't know what switch flipped in him that day. After that we continued to makeup and break up over the next couple years. He was the first boyfriend I had ever had and he damaged my self esteem so much that I believed I was unlovable. The worst came when my mom died. I fell into a spiraling depression and he labeled it as lazy. Two weeks later he ended everything and I swore I wouldn't take him back again." I paused, allowing him a moment to think. "Then we went on this school trip and I met you. I had no intentions of it ever going this far, but there's something about you that has me hooked. I couldn't imagine my life without you now."
"Why haven't you told me this before?" I laughed with a hint of sadness hiding behind the facade.
"Depression along with heartbreak isn't a prize. It isn't something to gloat about. I've been embarrassed ever since it happened. Partially because I let someone treat me the way he did and called it love. There is so much I missed out on and lost because of him. I feel pathetic when I speak about it." Lannan nodded. "Then again we all have skeletons in our closets."
"Can we promise that if either of us feels a certain way we tell the other? I've never done long distance and I don't want you to put your life on hold for me." I nodded and wrapped my arms around his neck. He nuzzled his nose into the side of my neck and let out a long sigh. "Does this mean you'll be my girlfriend?" I pulled away once more and help up a finger.
"On one condition." he raised an eyebrow. "Never, and I mean never, flake out on your friends and family again. I know that I wasn't easy to reach, but I would have called back. Now that I mention it, I planned on calling right after I watched the video. That's when I found out yuo went rogue."
"I promise, Sam. I won't ever go off grid again. Unless absolutely necessary." we shared a laugh before lying down on the couch. "This is nice." and he was right. It truly was.