Keeping secrets between adults was one thing. But keeping a secret between two adults and one child was another. Yet, that was the very situation Harry currently found himself in with Zayn and his son.
Much to his satisfaction, Benjamin did keep the fact that his Papa was now coming around a secret from his Aunt and grandmother. But the more time went by, he wondered if he could. It seemed like such a tall task to ask of a four year old.
As long as his Papa was just in a book and his daddy said he wasn't around, he lived with that and enjoyed the stories. But now he knew his Papa could be in his life physically and he could tell him stories too. That kind of excitement could lead to over sharing.
Nevertheless, despite that looming over Harry, he did his best to forget about it. Because if it did happen, he wouldn't blame him anyway. Having two parents was a gift. And having been one who was old enough to remember living with his divorced mother whose ex husband stopped coming around to visit after so long, Benjamin's excitement over having his Papa around was understandable.
"Daddy, look what I made." Benjamin had said one evening in late January.
Harry, who had been editing his column for Faux Magazine, looked up from his tablet where Benjamin held up a green star he'd shaped with a press mold.
"Wow. A star. That's wonderful. And you even put googly eyes on it."
"Yeah."
"Are you going to keep this one?"
He shook his head.
"This one's for Papa."
Harry seemed surprised.
"Really?"
"Yeah. Can you call him? I want him to see."
Harry smiled warmly at him. Benjamin still hadn't seen Zayn since his birthday. He'd only talked to him on the phone. To call Zayn would not be a problem for him.
"Sure, I can. But you know he's been very busy and that's why he hasn't been over. So we'll see how available he is to talk right now."
"Yay!"
When he jumped up and down, Harry put a gentle hand on his shoulder to stop him.
"Be careful. If you get a nosebleed, that would make it very hard to talk to him."
That was true. So he calmed down and waited patiently while Harry called.
Seconds later, Zayn's voice came in on the receiver.
"Hello?"
"Hey."
"Hey? Is everything alright?"
"Yeah. Sorry. I know I shouldn't be calling your personal phone when you're at work."
"No, no, it's totally cool and I don't mind. But it is unusual and it has me worried."
"Well, don't be worried. Everything is okay. Benjamin's fine. I'm fine. We're both fine."
"Well that's good. So what made you call?"
"Benjamin wanted to talk to you. Hold on, I'll put it on speaker."
After putting the phone on speaker, he placed it down on the table.
"Alright, your Papa's on the phone, Benny."
"Hi, Papa."
"Hey. I'm so sorry I haven't been able to see you lately, I've been very busy. But I miss you. What have you been up to?"
"I made a star."
"You did?"
"Uh huh. It's for you."
"For me?"
"Yeah. You can take it home."
"Why, thank you. I bet I'm going to love it very much. I love all your projects."
"Okay. Can I put it in your room?"
Harry's eyes got big.
"You want to put it in my room?"
"Uh huh. I know all the good spots."
"Uh, Benny." Harry quickly spoke up and his face was as red as a tomato.
Good thing Zayn couldn't see him.
"We can't just invite ourselves over some else's house. It's rude. We have to wait until they tell us they want us to be there."
"Oh."
"While, your daddy is very right, I still completely agree with you, Benny."
"You do?" Harry asked.
"I do. I mean, why not? You have welcomed me in your home many times since we put aside our past, Harry. I should be able to invite my son to my place if he wants to come over."
"Uh... yeah. Okay. If it's really okay with you."
"It is. And that includes being really okay with you too. It's not just about seeing Benny. I want to see you both at my house soon and I'll have a nice hot dinner for you."
Harry ran his hands through his hair.
"That's not necessary."
"Yes it is. Like I said, you let me in your home and fed me something warm. It's only right that I do it for you too."
"Okay. When then?"
"Well, I'll leave it up to you. After tomorrow, my work load should slow down significantly and I will be able to breathe again which means my schedule will be open again. But you're the one who has to ready a child so you tell me what day is best for you."
"I like Sundays. How about this Sunday?"
"That's perfect. I don't have a date this time."
He raised his brow.
"A date?"
"Did I say date?"
"You said date."
"I didn't mean date. I meant... an engagement. I don't have any prior engagements. Because.... a date makes it sound like I'm seeing someone, right?" Nervous laughter. "But I'm not. I'm single. So single. I am numero uno. Me myself and-"
'Zayn, I get it."
"Right..."
"So... Sunday then?"
"Yes. Sunday. Dinner is at six thirty. I'll text you my address."
"Okay."
"See you then."
"Yeah. Bye, Zayn."
When Harry hung up the phone, he let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding in. "Benjamin Noah Malik. Oh my gosh."
"I didn't do nothing." He said innocently.
He smiled and pulled his son towards him.
"Of course not. If you call having a dinner date with your father at his house, which we know nothing about, nothing. Now I'm going to have to get you a haircut. You have to look nice for you first ever visit at your Papa's."
"Awh." He pouted.
"Yeah, sorry. You know how I am."
And he did. Just like Harry was with unpacking moving boxes, he was thorough. And if Sunday was going to be special for his son, he was going to dress like it.
* * *
Meanwhile, back at the dry cleaners, Zayn was so excited about the new plans that he began to swivel in his chair. He could not believe he was bold enough to invite Harry and their son over to his house, his domain. He wanted to make them feel as comfortable there as possible.
When he finally stopped swiveling, he faced the doorway and jumped when he saw Louis coming in and closing his office door behind him.
"Whoa, what are you doing? And why are you closing the door?"
"Relax. What happened last night isn't happening again today. Besides, although I did enjoy the three times we've done it, I would like to explore you with more than just my hand next time. And I want to know how you'll respond because you haven't even begun to touch the spectrum of pleasure you could reach with me."
Zayn scratched his head nervously.
"Maybe next time. For now, why are you here? And how much did you hear of that?"
"How much did I hear of what?"
"My phonecall."
"I guess none of it. Because I didn't even know you were on the phone or else I wouldn't have just walked in."
"Oh."
"Wait. Why do you want to know if I heard your phonecall?"
"Because it was confidential company stuff."
"If it was so confidential, why'd you leave the door open, genius?"
"I wasn't expecting the call."
"Mhm."
"So why are you here again?"
Louis lowered his voice.
"I didn't want to do this. But I think something fishy is going on."
"With me?"
"No. With your business."
"Huh?"
He came over and sat down in the chair in front of his desk.
"A couple months ago, a customer came in to pick up a winter coat they had cleaned. But we couldn't find it. It was missing."
"Missing?"
"Yes. Missing. It wasn't at the store. She complained but she eventually left it behind and didn't come back. Then in December, a customer came in to pick up a winter coat and it was gone. We couldn't find it. He threatened to sue us if we didnt pay him. Remember?"
"Yeah, I wrote up the reimbursement for his coat."
"Exactly. And now today a customer came in to pick up a winter coat she brought in and guess what?"
"It's missing."
"Yes! And I don't think this is a coincidence. Once a month, a winter coat goes missing. And not only that. It happened to start in late November, right when it starts to get really cold. Odd."
Zayn put a hand on his chin.
"Odd indeed."
"That's not the worse part. I got ssuspicious about the time period so I checked the record last year to see if there was a pattern or not. Get this. I found four 'missing' winter coats spanning from that previous November to the following February, two of which you reimbursed customers for."
"What?"
"Yes. Exactly. Someone here is stealing winter coats."
Zayn sighed.
"As if I need anything like this right now."
"I know. We've been so busy with work the last two weeks. Well, except for last Sunday. We were busy with something else." He said with a wink.
"But I want you to know, I have my eye on your employees. I'm going to find out who is stealing from you. And hopefully quickly because they've already cost you hundreds."
Zayn shook his head.
"Yeah, thanks. But if you do find out anything, don't confront anyone. Just come to me first and let me know what you find out."
He stood up.
"Of course, babe. By the way, today's customer is bringing back proof of value tomorrow for her reimbursement. So get ready."
"Ugh. Thanks for the heads up."
When Louis left his office, Zayn huffed. Someone at his store was stealing from his customers? But he thought everyone here was good people. And not only good but loyal since they'd been at this store both before and since he took over. Why would they steal? Whatever reason they had, he was just glad Louis caught it and was ready to investigate for him.
But he did cringe a little bit too because he should've been ashamed of himself. He just lied to Harry about dating him. But for what? Harry told him once before that their relationship was Benjamin.
Not that he even wanted anything more than that anyway.
Psht, no.
But they were not forgetting they once loved each other either. And to bring Louis into this may nullify it all. He preferred not to do that if he didn't have to. And why should he if they were keeping their relationship a secret anyway? If no one was supposed to know outside of them, then Louis didn't have to know and Harry didn't have to know about him in return.
Therefore while Louis had gone off to possibly start his official investigation into the winter coat thief, Zayn took out his phone again and began to text Harry his address for Sunday.
➡️ ➡️ ➡️
Sunday came around very quickly and up until then, Zayn had spent a lot of his time figuring out what to make for dinner and making sure his place was clean enough by Harry's standards. Despite that there was a child in the house, Harry's home was impeccable. Surely Zayn, having no child, should match or even exceed that. So the house was sparkling clean by the end of Saturday night. That left Zayn all of Sunday to prepare what they would eat for dinner.
He wasn't much of a cook. And being single for so long didn't help him at all because he never had anyone depending on him to make good food. Despite that, there were a few dishes he had mastered overtime. One being his chicken alfredo dish. That was his go-to because it was delicious, easy and filling. And he didn't even have to stand over the hot stove the entire time. And he was quite sure Harry and their son would enjoy it.
By the time he was putting the noodles over into the sauce, there was a knock at his front door.
He quickly wiped his hands on a towel on the stove and made his way to the front door. Because he lived in an upscale suburban neighborhood, he had no curtains on the windows beside his front door. So he could see it was Harry and Benjamin just by noticing a part of Benjamin's puffer coat. He opened the door.
"Hi." Zayn said.
"Hi." Harry said.
"Hello, Papa. This is for you."
Benjamin held up the green star he had made a few days ago.
Zayn took it from him.
"Is this what you made for me?"
"Uh huh."
"Wow. It looks even more amazing than I imagined. And I'm big fan of the googly eyes. Thank you."
"You're welcome. It smells good."
"That would be your dinner."
"Mmm."
When Zayn stepped out of the way, Harry and Benjamin walked outside together.
"Glad you two could make it."
"Me too. Thanks for inviting us. It gave us something to do this weekend."
"Of course. I'll go take this to my bedroom and then finish preparing the food. Make yourself at home. Dinner should be ready shortly."
"Thank you."
When Zayn left, Harry took off his coat, unwrapped his scarf, then hung them both on one of the coat hooks at the door. Then he took a look around.
Zayn's house wasn't a mansion. But it was pretty big for a single man with no family to occupy. And from where he stood, he could see beautiful tile floors, wood carved lion figurines on an antique credenza, potted tropical plants and a crystal light fixture above. So maybe Zayn wasn't rich. But Harry still felt like he owed money just by being in here. So he quickly scurried off in the same direction Zayn went until he found him in the kitchen stiring noodles in a sauce.
"Are you crazy?"
Zayn looked up. "Huh? Am I crazy? For what?"
"You have no curtains or blinds out there."
"Oh."
"'Oh?' How do you feel safe?"
"Security systems. I'll know if something happens on my property."
"Yeah I have a security system too. But without curtains, people can still peep in with a pair of binoculars without even stepping onto your property. Besides, how do you know they haven't?"
"I don't. I guess if something happens I will then, huh?"
He started to laugh, but when he saw how serious Harry looked, he stopped and cleared this throat.
"Okay... I realize that I should not joke about that."
Harry shook his head slightly.
"You can do what you want. It's your house. I'm just saying... it worries me."
Zayn turned off the burner.
"You care about my safety so much that you're worried? Interesting."
"Well, I should be, shouldn't I? Because as long as Benjamin is here, your safety and his safety is one in the same."
"Mhm."
"It's true."
"Well don't worry about any of that. This is a safe, quiet neighborhood and the security here is state of the art. Me, you and our son are all safe here. I promise."
When he said that, Harry just stared at him. Not in a bad way. In an admiring way. There was just something about the way he could just say "our son" so easily. He didn't pause after he said it or anything. He just let the words flow as if he'd been familiar with saying them since the day Benjamin was born.
"Hello... Earth to Harry."
Harry jumped.
"Huh?"
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah sorry. I just zoned out for a bit."
"I see. You didn't hear what I said."
"What did you say?"
"I just took out the plates and utensils. They're right there. I was wondering if you could take them to the dining room and set the table while I bring out the food."
"Oh. Yeah, sure. I can do that."
"Thank you."
Not only did Zayn get out everything they would need. He also placed them on a tray to make them easier to carry. And since Harry had only been half paying attention, he didn't notice what was on top of the ceramic and glass utensils until he reached the table.
"Wait." He said.
"What?"
"Is this bamboo?"
Zayn nodded.
"I was hoping you noticed. Yes they are. I remembered your bamboo stuff and when I realized you were coming to dinner, I bought some for Benjamin. The lady who showed me where they were said I'm lucky they actually had them in the store. Apparently they're rare items."
"They are. Because most people don't ask for them or even know they exist."
"Well, now that I do, we have peace of mind he won't break any of my dishes or get hurt on them."
"Yeah, good thing. Thank you for thinking about him."
"You don't have to thank me, H. This isn't extra. I'm only doing what I'm supposed to do. I'll be back with the bread and beverages."
"Okay."
But Harry just kept thinking.
Zayn said he was just doing what he was supposed to do. But he wasn't. He was doing more than that. He could have gone with cheap plasticware and Harry would have been happy with that. Those items would have served the same purpose while being much cheaper. But he didn't just stop there. He went above and beyond to make sure they both had something they were familiar and comfortable with.
That was the attitude and effort of someone who was really embracing being a dad. It was also the effort of someone trying really hard to co-parent as painless as possible. So for a moment he felt a little bit guilty that he'd spent so much time keeping his son from Zayn.
About ten minutes later, everyone's hands were washed, food was on their plates and they were eating. That's when Harry heard music playing around them.
"Um... music?"
"Yep." Zayn said as he sat his phone down on the table.
"Are these Lofi beats?"
"They are."
Harry chuckled. "Why?"
"I always listen to lofi beats when I eat. Not at the dining room table though. I usually eat in the living room on the couch. Something nice and chill helps me chew slower and enjoy my food."
"Hmm."
"What?"
"Nothing. I like the chill music."
"Good for helping kids sleep too, by the way."
Harry looked at Benjamin and back at Zayn.
"Not at the dinner table though. Or else you get to carry him to the car when it's time to leave."
Zayn smiled over at his son.
"I don't mind. How's your food, Benjamin?"
"It's good. I like this bread."
"That's called an Italian loaf and it is very good. What do you think about the noodles and sauce?"
"Yummy."
"I was really hoping you would say something like that. Maybe one day I will teach you how to make it. And by that, I mean the exact measurements and everything. I won't be stingy and call it a secret like your daddy calls his hot chocolate recipe."
Harry reached over and gave his shoulder a light playful shove.
"Do not talk about me to my son."
"I'm not saying anything new. Trust me. If anybody already knows how you are, it would be him. And technically he and I both have been around you about the same amount of time. I was around you for four years and he's been around you for four years. These last few months with you are really just a refresher for me."
"Wow. Benny, are you going to let him get away with saying this?"
"He's funny, daddy." Benjamin said with a big grin on his face.
"Yeah... Funny looking."
But the thing about that response is that he already knew that wasn't true. Zayn was a beautiful boy in high school and now he was a beautiful man. It was really annoying. But at least since Benjamin was pretty much his spitting image, then he knew he'd grow up to be a handsome young man too.
Dinner went by pretty smooth and it turned out the Lofi beats did help them enjoy their food more. But even greater than that, it could put a four year old to sleep quick.
He didn't fall asleep at the dinner table. But he did fall asleep on the couch while Harry and Zayn were washing and drying the dishes together. So Zayn picked him up and carried him out to Harry's SUV like he said he would. Then he buckled him into his car seat.
"Bye, little man. See you again soon." Zayn whispered even though he couldn't hear him. Then he closed the door.
"I really hate to say goodbye all the time." Zayn said.
"I know. But who knows? Maybe one of these days you won't."
"What does that mean?"
"It means maybe he can come by and spend a night with you."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Sure. He really likes you. And apparently he can fall asleep easily here."
Zayn laughed.
"Okay. Yeah. Maybe one day. But I am a little worried. I know nothing about his nighttime and morning routines and also I have nothing here to entertain him."
"But you do know what he likes. You see what he plays with at my house all the time."
"What about his nighttime and morning routine though? You could tell me one hundred times and I'd still be confused as hell about what to do for him and how to do it."
Harry smiled softly.
"Relax for now. The time hasn't come just yet. But I have full confidence that it will and that you will know what you're doing. You are a good dad."
"Not as good as you though. I mean... I knew you were a pretty fucking amazing person with all that stuff you used to do for the school and all that. But now... you actually take care of a tiny human every single day of your life. Now that is truly amazing. And no matter how things went with us, I couldn't ask for a better daddy to my son."
Harry chuckled quietly and turned towards the window to look at his son.
"Well, considering I'm one in thirty nine thousand, chances are I'm the only gay man you would have crossed paths with that could have physically given you a child. So you didn't really have that much of a choice."
Zayn rested his hand on the car and leaned against the window to look at his son too.
"True. But isn't that crazy though? Those odds? It happened to be us."
"Yeah because even with sex ed classes, it never once occurred to us what we could have been getting ourselves into if we had sex without protection. I mean sure neither of us knew about me at the time but we still let our guard down. And as a result..."
"We made a miracle."
When Harry looked over at him, Zayn was already looking at him. They were so close to each other's faces. That allowed Harry to look over Zayn's facial features. His half smile, his chizzled cheek bones, his eyes that were shimmering underneath the moonlight.
Clearly his joke from earlier about Zayn being "funny looking" held no weight at all. He was one beautiful man. And to think, as attractive as he was to boys and girls everywhere, Harry somehow became the only person Zayn Malik ever wanted to actually date in high school. What did he have back then and did he still have it now?
"Hmm."
"What?"
He snapped out of it.
"Nothing. Sorry. Um... it's really cold and we've been standing out here too long. I need to turn the heat on for Benny."
"Right. Sorry. You should do that."
Before Harry could reach for the handle to his door, Zayn beat him to it. It surprised Harry. It was so sweet and gentleman-like.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. See you later."
"Bye."
When he got in the car, Zayn closed the door behind him, then stepped back to watch him leave.
Now of course Zayn knew he wasn't with Harry. Not in the way he was supposed to be with Louis. Their only connection was obviously Benjamin. But for some reason, it just didn't feel right that he had to let them leave tonight. He should have asked them to stay longer.
That's when he was reminded of something Harry said to him last month. Zayn really should have given him more on the last day of school. But he failed to do so. And yet here he was, still doing more of the same things. Was he ever going to learn his lesson? Perhaps if he missed out on enough. Hopefully by then it wouldn't be too late.