little teaser? harry isn't gonna be in my next book BUT he will be in more so don't you worry!
what's your favourite song at the minute? mine is addicted by jorja smith lol
when I finish the last page, I wipe my eyes and smile, putting my book down.
that was beautiful.
I love lesbians.
I pick up my phone and my eyes widen when is see the time.
4:03am
fucking hell.
I was reading for a long ass time.
but once I got going, I had to finish the last of my book.
when I glance through the notification, I see a message from billie.
'are you awake?' sent ten minutes ago.
what?
I reply a simple 'yeah, u ok?' and wait for her reply, responding to a few other people.
she texts me back 'come to my room please' and I furrow my brows.
it's literally four in the morning, what does she want?
I flick my fairy lights off and climb out of bed, leaning everything on my bed and walking down to her bedroom door, knowing lightly and opening the door.
when I peek me head in, billie has led lights which light up the room in a deep blue.
I want blue lights.
her room isn't anything exciting but she's got a full bed and looks tiny wrapped up in the sheets.
she peeks her head out of the covers, her cheeks clearly stained with tears.
"what's wrong?" I step closer and shut her door, standing at the bottom of the bed.
"can you sleep with me? I really need someone right now"
"you want me to sleep with you?" I ask in surprise and she nods, biting her lip and sitting up, wrapping the blanket around her.
"please, I wouldn't ask if I didn't need it but I need to cuddle right now"
"okay calm down, let me just go get something, and I'll be right back"
I walk back to my bunk, grabbing lamby, my pillow with a silk pillowcase on and my blanket, walking back into her room.
I close the door behind me and almost trip when the bus shakes.
that's so embarrassing.
billie doesn't say anything and neither do I but when I walk closer to the bed, she lifts up the bed sheets and shifts over.
wordlessly, I slide in beside her, adjusting my pillow and turning to face her.
billies looks up at me through her wet lashes, biting her lip.
"do you wanna talk about it?" I ask her in a gentle voice, keeping my face soft.
she shakes her head and I reach to move a strand of hair out of her face. she closes her eyes for a moment giving me a small sad smile.
"cmere love" I open my arms and she doesn't hesitate to tuck herself into me, letting out a sigh of relief.
she starts crying against my chest and I don't speak, holding her against my chest and stroking her hair.
"you're okay love, im here" billie shuffles and lifts her head up, reaching to pull her hand out.
"who's this?"
I look down at her hands and see my baby in her hand.
I didn't mean for her to find that.
"that's my lamby"
"lamby?" she questions, her voice small and broken.
I know she's sensitive right now so I need to be gentle, especially because im led in bed with her.
"yeah, she makes me feel better when im feeling sad. give her a cuddle, she'll look after you"
"are you sure?"
I nod my head and smile "look after her, okay?"
"thank you" she whispers, tucking her head back into my chest and cradling my lamby in her hands.
I hold billie close and stroke her hair and it's not long before her soft snores are brushing against my skin.
she's so soft and sensitive right now and honestly im so confused as to whats going on with her.
why is this the second night she's crying and wanting to cuddle me in bed?
why am I letting her?
why do I like it?
I need to talk to her tomorrow morning when I wake up because honestly, all of this confusion is making my head hurt.
I mean, why does she keep crying?
I want to ask her but as long as she knows im here for her if she ever needs to talk.
whenever she's ready.
but part of me also wants to keep this the way it is.
because what happens if I talk to her and everything goes back to the way it was?
what happens if it gets better?
my head is swimming with thoughts as I drift off to sleep.
when I wake back up again, billie is laid right ontop of me, her head resting on my chest, her arms wrapped around me.
I lie there for a moment, her body a comforting weight ontop of mine.
her room is still lit with a bright blue so I glance around to locate the remote but while im laid flat on my back, I can't find it.
I keep lying here for a moment, listening to billie's breathing and lightly running my fingers through her hair, which is a little knotty from her movements in her sleep.
I wonder what it would be like to date billie.
to wake up every morning like this.
to make her laugh.
to make her smile.
to make her cum.
okay stop.
am not getting myself worked up when she's breathing into my neck.
when she's got no pants on.
december stop thinking about her legs!
"what are you doing?"
I realise im running my fingers up and down her bare thigh under the sheets.
"sorry" I move my hand and billie groans, rolling away from me.
"sorry for sleeping on you" billie grumbles, wiping her eyes and reaching beside her, changing the lights from blue back to normal lights.
"it's okay baby, it's not like it's the first time" I laugh a little and billie rolls her eyes, turning to face me.
"we're not gonna talk about that"
"we're not?" I raise my brow at her and she huffs, flopping back onto the bed.
"look, I don't like sleeping alone, okay? I don't wanna talk about it"
"im not pressuring you to talk about anything billie, please know that. if you want me to sleep with you every night, I will do"
"and you'd be okay with that?"
"I wouldn't offer if I didn't ask"
"im hungry" billie doesn't say nothing more, climbing out of bed and walking out of the room, closing her bedroom door behind her.
I guess that's the end of that.
lil cute n sad billie :(