Mia entered the light. The light was so warm that she felt anything was possible. She follows the light through the shadows. Consumed in darkness. Following that light, it revealed a castle. A single castle in a town she never heard of. She grabbed her armor, ready to defend herself. From that moment on, the light lies before her. The flickering, oval shape, coming to her.
"Mia..." It says, "Welcome to your safe place. I know about your rivalry with the Darkness. The true darkness in our kingdom. You defend your honor, your badge, most importantly yourself. I guide you here. For your name. A name you had not pledged from the moment you were born."
My hands type faster than ever. Time flies. Not giving up. Every wording, every setting, every character I made goes along with the plot I got inspired from today. Benjamin checks me in with my drinks every hour as he goes upstairs, studying away, while I'm typing. Benjamin's right; I could feel somebody in my heart, and soul. Experiencing what I am doing, with my own fictional story.
As the time lasts, Benjamin enters the room one more time as I am finishing my tenth chapter. "Hey, Lia... It's 10 pm."
I look at Benjamin, shockingly, "It is?" Benjamin nods and I look at the clock on my computer and it is indeed. "Wow... for some reason, I didn't think my stomach was growling."
Benjamin laughs and I reach my arms up to stretch my back. "While you were writing, I made our dinner for us so when you're done with your chapter. Come along, love."
"I will. Thanks." I smile at Benjamin and he left the room. As I finish my chapter with my last sentence, I won't surrender my truth, from powerful Mia. I look at the time it was 15 minutes past, I walk to the kitchen and there he is, Benjamin, cooking our dinner.
Not only did he just cook for us, but he also lit the candles on our table and presented a beautiful, romantic setting. I walk to him, wrap my arms around his waist and give him a kiss on his cheek. "Hi..."
"My love..." Benjamin smiles at me, and I observe his cooking. He's making some spaghetti and meatballs for all of us including the bread I made a few days ago... Never thought that Benjamin would cook something for me, for us. But I wouldn't mind at all.
"Maybe I should keep writing all night then." Benjamin and I laugh together. "It looks delicious. Thank you." I sit at our usual dining table in the kitchen. Benjamin serves my dinner on a plate along with bread and my water in the wine glass. "So I wrote ten chapters and I cannot wait to punch Anna's face with relief that it is over."
Benjamin laughs, "As I said, Lia, I'm proud of you and I haven't finished reading your novel, but I'm getting to it. No spoilers."
I laugh at Benjamin's comment as he takes his seat beside me. I lift my glass to preserve a short toast, "To us."
"To us..." We clink our glasses, giving me a memory of where we first met. How odd that Benjamin went from stranger to the love of my life, I couldn't ask for anything more than him. We begin our dinner as Benjamin starts the conversation. "What do you want for our wedding? Clearly, we haven't discussed this, but I want to have the wedding you dream about."
Gazing at him while smiling, "Well, like I said I like to have a wedding in autumn. Not too warm or cool, just at the right temperature where leaves are falling. I don't want to have a big wedding, just friends and family. Ceremony: in the woods. Reception: I don't really know, maybe our home? Maybe Mom's home? I can imagine Lottie throwing leaves as I make an entrance at the altar."
"With no one giving you away?"
I shrug, "Maybe by myself... then I would look at you waiting for me. Entering the next chapter of our lives." Benjamin smiles, and he kisses my hand.
As I am washing the dishes, Benjamin did marvelous work on our dinner. After the last dish, I feel the arms around my waist, and someone kisses me on my shoulder. I giggle, knowing who it is. "I love you." I look at Benjamin's eyes and gazes at me, passionately.
I smile at him and mutter to him, "I love you..." He smiles softly and moves my hair from my shoulder giving him an open space. He kisses passionately on my neck as his hand caresses my arms, my stomach, under my sweatpants. He rubs on the fabric of my underwear, teasing me, I moan lightly. While his hand is busy, his other hand turns me to kiss him.
I grab his face closer to me, more passionately. He let go of his hand and put both of his hands on my waist. He pushes me against the counter, while his hand from my waist, level it down under my underwear. Giving him a position as he inserts his fingers inside of me. I gasp slightly at the sudden experience, he grins slightly and kisses me passionately.
Benjamin's lips lead the way on my neck again while his fingers are inside of me. My hands grip the counter as I moan at how Benjamin is pleasuring me. He adds more and more pleasure, he kisses me to quiet my moaning and more to him. He pulls away, letting me look at his blue eyes. I mean- wait... his dark brown eyes. "Dahlia..."
For some reason, I feel chills in my arms. By his presence, by his words, seem so familiar. I feel my throat is drying up, needing thirst. Benjamin consumed me by kissing me more. His fingers are going faster and harder. Do you think of me while you fucking Benjamin? Kitchen, blue, thirsty. Kitchen, blue, thirsty. Do you think of me while you fucking Benjamin? Kitchen, blue, thirsty. Tears are welling up and I shout to defend myself. "Stop... STOP! STOP!!"
Benjamin pulls away. My hands are shaking, and I can't breathe. I look down on the floor, wrap my arms around myself, protecting myself. My eyes are watering, I feel so broken... I don't want him to see me like this. "Lia..."
He tries to comfort me by caressing my hair, I slap him away. "No..."
I left the room and went to my office to calm down. Locking myself in, and takes a shaking breath, trying to breathe. What is wrong with me?!? Why am I doing this to myself? I look around the room and see the moon and stars shining their way through on me. Suddenly, I hear the doorbell ring. I can't help, but wonder who is coming here at this hour? I wipe my tears away and take a deep breath.
As I approach the front door, I open my door. My eyes widen by shock and are surprised all in one by who is here. "Marsha?"
There she is, her eyes are on me. Waiting to let me come in with her usual blue, jumpsuit. "Dahlia..." Her voice is shaken, "I'm sorry for coming here, unannounced, but can I stay here? For tonight?" I couldn't help, but feel sorry for her. There is something up from her home, and I'm glad to let her escape for one night.
"Yeah, Marsha, come on in." Marsha enters, and I grab her purple overcoat to hang on the coat racker by the door. "Um, would you like something to eat? Drink?"
"No... no" She shakes her head, shakenly, more frightened and overwhelmed. Benjamin appears in the hallway and sees the sudden guest in our home. "Benjamin! It's nice to see you."
"You too." Benjamin smiles at Marsha. He looks at me, surprised as well I am.
"Marsha is staying the night. Benjamin, would you show her the room while I get the stuff?"
Benjamin nods and guides Marsha upstairs in one of our guest rooms. As I grab some blankets and pillows from the living room. I go upstairs and meet Marsha in our small guest room by Benjamin's office. She's taking in the view of the moon by the window in the room. "Nice full moon, is it?"
Marsha turns to me, softly smiling, "Yep, it surely is."
I lay the blankets and pillows on the bed, "Just in case, you get cold during the night. There is a restroom by the end of the hall to your right when you leave the room. Benjamin and I are sleeping in our room across from you if you need anything. Preferably, not in the middle of the night."
I smile awkwardly as she chuckles along with me. I haven't had a conversion with her since I warned her about her daughter. With Edward. Marsha looks at me, sadly, "I heard the news. About you and Benjamin. Congratulations."
I smile at her, "Thank you..."
Marsha walks toward the bed and sits on the end of it. "You know why I came here, Dahlia? Because Edward proposed to me too. Quite funny, is it?" My eyes widen with her news from tonight, but I'm not surprised that Edward tried his best to win. "From what I saw this morning when you talked with Edward, it wasn't pleasant. I think I understood why you warned me about him."
I walk to Marsha and sit beside her, "Marsha, my relationship with Edward is hard to comply with. I didn't like how we left out of our conversation, but I couldn't help but tell you something important that you need to know. He's not the right man for you, Marsha, and you know that."
"You don't know anything about me, Dahlia. Don't try to tell me that you know anything about my relationship with Edward."
"I don't, Marsha, that's the point. I don't. Clearly, you see the signs, the warnings, and you intend to ignore them until I give the opportunity to see them." Marsha looks at me, unreadable, but her eyes are filled with tears. "Did you, or did you not see Edward change? From that night, before Mom and I came to visit?"
Marsha hesitates, and she shed her tears down her cheeks as she answers my question. "I did. He punched the wall after he grabbed my arm. Hardly. It gave me the bruise, and you understand why I wear the long sleeve robe from that day." She takes her shakeable deep breath and proceeds with her words.
"You're smart, Lia. You have always been, I was so stupid to not see it. The signs, the warnings, but I stayed for my daughter. From our last conversation, you warned me about my daughter. I followed it. She had been on my side, and she never felt anything comfortable with my presence. I thought her attitude towards me was about me, but it's not..."
"Marsha, like I said to you. I never hated you. You're still in my life and in my mom's life. Your relationship with your beautiful daughter, Cali, will be ok. It takes time, Marsha. She will live her life after she graduates and she'll take you as her role model in her life. Time... as your friendship with Mom, all you have to do is apologize, and she'll forgive you. We haven't really had a conversation such as this, but I would be honored to have you as my friend."
Marsha looks at me, sadly, and gives me a hug as I hug her back. "Thank you, Dahlia. I always knew you're special." She pulls away, "I'm sorry. About you and Edward. Whatever you have with him, I understand you don't feel comfortable sharing. But hopefully, one day, you'll share your fears and overcome them."
I smile at Marsha, and give her a hug, one last time before I go downstairs. I'm not in the mood to sleep with Benjamin, after my breakdown. I go to my office and begin writing at midnight.
The alarm rings from my clock as I wake myself up at the time of 9:30 in the morning. I go upstairs to the restroom and start my day by cleaning myself up. I have a plan ahead for tonight for Christmas. I invited Nathan to come and join the family in my home for the holidays and he said yes. He's planning to spend the week with me before he'll fly back to New Jersey. I brush my hair into the ponytail, getting myself a simple long-sleeve nightgown.
I wrote ten more chapters last night before I dozed off. Talking with Marsha last night was a blessing. I'm happy that she's not my frenemy anymore, but a friend. I hope Mom will accept her mistakes and forgive her. I see how much she misses my mom. I go downstairs and see Marsha having coffee with Benjamin.
"Hi! Good morning!"
"Morning to you, Marsha. Do you want anything to eat before you go?"
"No, no. I don't wanna pressure you for giving me satisfaction. Spending night was it for me."
I nod to Marsha and I guide her to the front door. I hug her one more time before she leaves. "You come to me whenever you need help. To talk, to stay the night. Whenever you need, Marsha."
"Thank you, Dahlia." She pulls away and looks at Benjamin standing beside me. "You better not give her any doubts, since she will be your wife."
"Oh, Lia already shared our news with you?"
"No, Edward did. When she told him." I look down on her remark, I haven't really told Benjamin, from my note completely when I left that morning. "Alright, thank you again, Lia. don't worry, I won't tell Edward where I was last night."
I give her a smile of thanks for not causing any more drama from him. She goes to her car and drives away, giving me and Benjamin a wave. As for Benjamin, he walks in front of me in thought, watching Marsha drive away. I didn't want to keep a secret from him, where I was. I was doing his advice for speaking up for myself, from the worst.
"When did you tell him?"
"Yesterday morning... I gave you a note that I'll be back-"
"It wasn't specific, Dahlia, you know that." Benjamin turns to me, "When you came back to your Mom's house all guns blazing, saying that we'd get married next year, you'd come from his?"
"Benjamin, I was following your advice for speaking up for myself. You did, you told me to speak up. I thought what would be worse than my family. Besides, two things aren't related at all."
"Oh?" Benjamin looks offended and mad all in one. "Because I am starting to wonder, whether you actually want to marry me from my proposal, or whether this is some really fucked-up way of getting back at Ted."
"Really? Do you want to play that card? How about when you called Ali without my acknowledgment? So she could, what, she regrets her mistake and comes back to you?"
"Dahlia, I felt weak after hearing the fact you went to Ted from that day. Did he say something to you due to the incident last night?" I hesitated from his question, telling him that he did. "Lia, you have no idea how much I want to protect you. From anyone, especially him. I want this. I want you to be my wife. I want to be at your side when you need me the most. Forever. But now, I'm not sure that you do..."
Benjamin walks inside, leaving me in thought. Of course, I want this... I hadn't thought of Edward when he proposed to me. Or even getting revenge on him. I said yes because of Benjamin. I said yes because he makes me the person I want to be. I said yes because I want him to be the love of my life forever. I said yes because most of all he accepts me for who I am. I love him, unconditionally.
I go upstairs getting ready to pick up Nathan from the train station. Leaving me in a ponytail still, along with a grey sweater with blue jeans with white sneakers. I'm planning to wear a light tan, wool overcoat when I leave. The moment I begin to leave I decide to see Benjamin in the living room. He's sleeping on the couch with his glasses, leaving him halfway reading my book, Confide in Secrecy.
I smile at how handsome he is. I decided to give him an answer. I walk toward him and kneel in front of him. I grab his hand, holding it in comfort. As he wakes up to see me, closing the book with his bookmark. I pull his hand and let him caress my hair when he tried to last night to comfort me. He begins to realize what I'm doing, by letting him touch me ever since the incident.
I look at his eyes, lovingly, "I do want this..." I lean against his palm and let my hand go to let him touch me. He smiles more and gazing me lovingly, as we read ourselves. His hand goes from my hair to my left hand, kissing on it. "I have to pick up Nathan from the train station, and my family will arrive here soon after." Benjamin nods at me and I give him a kiss, simple yet passionately.