Since I figured it'd be easier to wallow in my own sadness while sitting instead of standing, I looked for a bench to sit on. As I sat there and pondered about the news I just received, I could see and hear everybody else around me enjoying the festival. It made me jealous seeing so many people enjoying themselves, while I was doing the complete opposite. Every time I heard a laugh, it angered me. And I got even angrier at myself for feeling this way.
"Hey Ezra," Hailee said, as she slowly approached me. "You feeling okay? You look pretty down in the dumps."
"Oh, I'm fine. Just hating my life. The usual. Don't worry about me."
"You can't say 'just hating my life' and 'don't worry about me' in the same sentence," Hailee replied, as she scooched next to me on the bench. "What's wrong?"
"I just...I-I feel like I should give up."
"On what?"
"Everything, Hailee," I sighed. I was trying my hardest to hold back tears, but it was like trying to hold back the biggest flood. "What's the point in trying to win a game where all the odds are stacked against you? Wouldn't be a very fun game right? And in my case, I have probably the biggest odds stacked against me. I mean an evil spirit that wants to destroy the entire world is living inside me, and torments me with insults and threats everyday."
"Not only that, but the whole reason we're in this world, why I have the Cursed Sword, why I'm clearly not ever going to find love, why Zero's after me, why Zero almost killed you guys, is because of my stupid curse! My future's been planned out already, and all that's ahead is more bad luck! If I know all of that already...why bother trying to enjoy my life?"
There was a long pause before Hailee responded with anything again. I couldn't blame her. If I were in her shoes, I probably wouldn't know how to respond either. But finally, Hailee put her right arm around my shoulder, and told me something that was so simple, yet was the answer that I had needed the entire time.
"Ezra, the odds may be stacked against you. Maybe the chances you lose in this 'game' are ninety-nine point nine percent. But that just means you can be that point zero one percent. So, don't give up. Because if you do, then you'll really lose without ever seeing if there was a chance to win in the future."
"Y-You're right...thank you Hailee," I replied. "I'm so dumb. I can't just give up without trying to beat the odds first."
"Exactly. And if anyone can beat them, it's you, Ezra. You're the most odd person I know."
"Shut up," I chuckled, slightly.
"Also, why do you think you're not going to ever find love?"
"Well...everyone I've liked so far hasn't liked me back," I said. "The closest I've gotten to reciprocal love was Lucy, and she kidnapped me."
"Who else have you liked?"
"Phoebe, Taylor from our AP History class, and..."
"And...?"
"Nothing," I said. There was no way I could tell her that I had the biggest crush on her at one point. Not after everything. Even if I didn't feel that way anymore, I didn't want to make things awkward with just that fact.
"Now that I think about it, you do always stare at Phoebe in a goofy way. Can't believe I didn't pick up on that."
"Well, those days are over," I said. "Now that she's with that stupid pilot Bowie, I'll never have a chance. Actually, I don't even think I had a chance from the start. This just makes it worse."
"C'mon, Ezra," Hailee pouted. "You can't just give up. You're an amazing guy, and I'm sure whoever you like will see that too. Obviously not Phoebe though since that windows sort of closed now, but you know what I mean."
"T-Thanks," I blushed. Hearing someone I fantasized about marrying almost all the time say that I was an amazing guy made my heart do jumping jacks.
She's just trying to cheer you up, dimwit, End said. I wouldn't take that as a serious compliment if I were you. I mean, for that to be true you'd have to actually be an amazing guy.
I know you're just trying to get a rise out of me. Shut up, End.
"You're welcome but, are you okay?" Hailee asked. "You look angry."
"I'm fine it's just End is bothering me in my head right now."
"Ah, forgot you have an evil spirit harboring inside you."
"Yup," I sighed. "My life is just great. I have the worst luck when it comes to love, and evil spirits."
"As true as that may be," Hailee started. "Don't forget you have me, Alex, Phoebe, Bowie, and the rest of the Outers on your side. Whatever bad luck comes your way, we'll be right there next to you."
"You're right," I started. "I shouldn't even be talking about Bowie like that. It's not like he's a bad person. He's been nothing but kind to me since we've met him. I should just be happy for him and Phoebe. Thank you so much, Hailee. I needed that."
Despite me saying all of that about Bowie, I still felt hatred towards him for being with Phoebe. He was a good person, but I still despised him as if he was a horrible person.
"What are friends for?" she replied. "Now c'mere and get in these arms."
Following her orders, I reached for Hailee's chest with both of my arms, and pulled her in for a warm, gentle, and affectionate hug. I already acknowledged that I needed that pep talk from her out loud, but the hug made me realize that I needed it even more than I thought. As I was in Hailee's warm, comfortable embrace, all the feelings that had been laying dormant in my subconscious mind started to come up to the surface. Before I knew it, I said something stupid. True, but stupid.
"You're the best Hailee. I-I...I love you."
"W-What...?" she said, as she slowly pulled away from the hug.
"I said I...love...your new clothes!" I exclaimed, bogusly.
"Oh...um, thank you-"
"Yeah of course! Anyway, we should go find the others quickly!"
"Y-You're right," Hailee said.
"Aren't I? Let's go!"
Doing my best to distract her from the fact that I just casually confessed my love to her, I sprinted away. It took about seven minutes of running alongside Hailee until we found Alex. Phoebe and Bowie were somewhere else having tons of fun I assumed. Even though I was jealous that they were all having fun while I was trying to figure out how to deal with my broken heart, I was glad that I successfully evaded from the awkward moment I had just created between me and Hailee. However, it seemed that Hailee truly didn't hear what I said, and didn't just say "what" because she wanted to make sure that she actually heard me say that I love her. There was no way she would just let me act like nothing of that sort happened if she heard me.
"Oh hey guys," Alex said to us as he tried to catch some pink fish with a peculiar shape, using a net.
"What the heck is that?" I asked. I couldn't resist the curiosity that was bubbling within me as I stared at this unique fish.
"I had no clue either. They said it's called a koalo fish, or something."
"A koala what?" Hailee said.
"No babe. Koalo."
"So like koala, but with an o at the end instead of an a?"
"Basically," Alex shrugged.
"Where are Phoebe and Bowie, Alex?" I jumped in.
"Dunno. Probably making out somewhere."
Hearing him say that so casually since there was a good chance that was close to the truth made me feel like a dagger penetrated my heart.
"Oh I see them!" Hailee shouted. "They're over there!"
Following the direction of the finger she was using to point them out for us, I looked for the couple. It only took a few seconds until I spotted a guy and a girl with their arms linked, laughing and smiling. Another few seconds passed, and they saw us too.
"What's up everyone?" Phoebe smiled.
"Crap!" Alex cried in frustration.
"Weren't able to get the fish, huh?" Hailee chuckled.
"You think this is funny?"
"Kinda. It doesn't even look hard."
"This isn't no ordinary game. It requires an immense amount of strategy, precision, skill, finesse, focus, patience-"
"Yeah yeah just pay the man and move so I can win you that fish," Hailee interjected.
Doing as his girlfriend ordered, he paid the man running the game, and got up so that Hailee could have a turn at it.
"Wait, how do you have money, Alex?" I said.
"Phoebe gave me some."
"Ah that makes sense," I replied.
"That's the last time I give any of you guys money, though," Phoebe stated. "You guys are gonna have to do some odd jobs or something to make money."
"What kind of odd jobs?"
"Well, since people know we're Outers, we get requests to do things like finding a certain ingredient, item, or just manual labor."
"Are those jobs where you have to find something pretty hard?" Alex said.
"Sometimes," Phoebe admitted. "I almost died one time trying to get a dragon tooth."
"A dragon tooth?!" Alex yelled.
"Yup. It was super dangerous and scary. But I made tons of money."
"M-Maybe I'll just make money some other way..."
"That sounds kinda fun," I smirked.
"Of course it does to you, Mr. I Can't Die," Alex said, mockingly.
"Don't be all jelly. Plus, if I get money from a job, I'll share it with you guys."
"Really?" Bowie asked, grinning. I forgot that he counted as "you guys" too since he was here with us right now. In my head, I meant everybody except him. Clearly from his reaction, that didn't translate as well as I thought it would.
"Y-Yeah...of course, Bowie."
"Thank you, Ezra. You're so generous."
"No problem," I lied. I definitely had a problem with it. But it was okay. I was already devising all kinds of plans that would subtlety let that girl stealer know that I wanted to be reimbursed at some point if I were to give him some money from a job in the future. The last thing I wanted to do was give the guy who was smooching with my crush money without getting anything in return.
AN: heyyyy. i know it's been a LONG time since I've updated this story, and You're My Alcohol. however, i truly plan on being more active in terms of when i update my stories. while i can't make any promises, i hope you guys stay tuned. and if ur reading this right now, i love you a ton, and i hope ur doing well! <3