I looked down at my hands as they shook.
I should have been dead. I had been cornered by Seokjin's men, their swords drawn. They were ready to run me through.
And then Dagon...
You don't have to thank me, he said. I was just doing my job as your protector.
I couldn't form any words. I could only play that moment in my mind over and over again.
I had thrown two men overboard... at the same time.
This is only a small amount of the power I can give you, Dagon added. Remember that.
"I don't want power," I said, as if speaking out loud would make it true. "I want to save my family."
You have to save yourself first, don't you?
My hands shook harder. I needed to get rid of him. I needed to find a way to extract him before I--
There was a knock at the door.
It took me two tries to get my shaking hand around the doorknob to open it. Jungkook was on the other side, rubbing his lip with his finger and looking lost in thought even though he had just knocked on my door.
"What is it?" I asked, feeling sweat drip down my neck.
He continued to rub his lip. I glanced between him and the door as he did, realizing this was the first time he had actually knocked instead of barging in.
He eventually stepped in, not looking at me but instead at the swords on the wall.
"I spent a lot of time trying to figure out why you would teach her to fight," he finally said. "It seems really obvious now."
I swallowed my heartbeat. "What are you talking about?"
He looked over his shoulder at me. "Y/N. You like her, don't you?"
I laughed, far more awkwardly than I should have. "Of course not. I only --"
"I think she likes you too."
I froze at his words, not sensing any irony in them. He folded his arms, tapping his fingers in thought. I could only swallow again, no words coming to my lips.
"After all," he suddenly said, sucking in a breath. "I'm incredibly charming and ruggedly handsome, and yet, she insists on spending time with you. You treat her better, I'm guessing."
I shifted my weight. This was more uncomfortable than when he was being an idiot.
"And since when did you start caring about how you treat people?" I asked.
His shoulders slumped, and I nearly apologized. Most of the time, he was someone I didn't know. He was a reckless criminal, caring nothing for consequences. He had changed so much from my little brother who dreamed of following in my footsteps; far from the teenage boy who applied to be a privateer for the king and was rejected due to his weak physique.
Despite his shattered dreams, I had continued on into the navy without him. And in turn, he became an enemy of both me and the king.
"Treating people well isn't beneficial in my line of... er... work," he replied. "But it is in yours. That's probably why you have better foresight than me."
I laughed bitterly. Foresight, huh? If I had looked after him properly as the elder brother - training him for the navy instead of leaving him to ruin himself - then we wouldn't be where we were now.
He thought I was training Y/N to save her. In reality, I think I was just trying to find redemption for abandoning my brother.
"See saw right through me," he said, licking his bottom lip. "She knew how I..."
He sighed, a painful laugh escaping his lips as he shifted his weight and cleared his throat.
"I've had blood on my hands before, Jimin... but not this much." His eyes glossed over. "There's a lot of things I'm willing to take. Life isn't one of them."
He stood as still and empty as a statue. When he didn't move or blink, I stepped forward and put a hand on the back of his neck, bringing him down to lean against my shoulder. He leaned his weight on me in despair. I kissed his temple.
"You know," I said, "sometimes when I think your soul is completely gone, you prove me wrong."
He didn't respond, resting himself against my shoulder.
I let him stay there as long as he needed... knowing that the blood on his hands was partly my fault.
--------------
I had been too distracted by Dagon to even catch wind of the mutiny. It was my own fault.
The crew that was once ours now held Jungkook and I captive now. They threw us into a cell together. The rest of the crew that had not submitted to Taehyung's command were also dragged into their own cells. Some locked themselves in cells, obviously enchanted by charmspeak.
"What the hell is happening?" Jungkook asked, inspecting the locked bars.
"Siren enchantment," I replied. "Taehyung used his power as a siren to put a spell over the crew."
"And Y/N?"
"Also a siren. An accomplice, seemingly."
"And the fiancée as well?"
I thought for a moment. I wasn't sure what Seokjin's role was at all. The markings on his chest were certainly from the spiritual realm. The patterns were quite vivid.
I decide whether you get your wings... or if you're sentenced to endless reincarnation.
He's a judge, Dagon said.
"What's that?" I asked aloud, forgetting myself in the situation.
"What's what?" Jungkook asked me.
I held up a finger for him to be silent.
A Judge puts the creatures of the spiritual realm on trial, Dagon continued. He decides if they are punished or given their original power.
"What original power?" I asked.
The power to destroy humans... like you and your brother.
"Are you talking to the voices in your head again?" Jungkook asked. "This isn't really the time for that, is it?"
I grit my teeth, throwing my hands up in frustration. "I don't have time for your opinions! There's things about this world you don't understand, Jungkook."
"I understand that Uncle Hyowon is dead!" he threw back. He grabbed my face, making me look at him. "He lost himself to this bullshit - same as you - and now he's dead! You'll end up the same way!"
We both know that's not true, Dagon said. I'm the one that's been keeping you alive.
I pulled out of Jungkook's hold, grunting. I was about to tear him verbally limb from limb, until I saw the fear in his eyes. We stared at each other for a few tense moments, my breath getting stuck in my lungs.
He needs you, Dagon said. You can see it, can't you?
I ran my tongue through my dry mouth, nodding. My brother needed me. The look on his face told me that he wanted me around. He hadn't looked at me that way since we both tried out for the navy.
But I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't protect either one of us.
I can help you with that, you know, Dagon continued. I can keep both of you alive.
"I can't do this on my own, Jimin," Jungkook said, cutting into our conversation. "I need you to keep it together."
For a split second - and only a split second - I saw his shoulders tremble. I brought my hand to the back of his neck, bringing him into my embrace. In my arms, he was just my little brother... and I was the older brother responsible for his safety.
If I wanted redemption, this was the only way.
"All right..." I said. "You win."
Although Jungkook heard it come from my lips... Dagon was the one who understood.
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Sorry for the late post, everyone. It's been quite a week. Everything from university finals, to new coronavirus regulations that might leave me jobless (again), to my cat passing away from kidney failure. All I want is a week off to sleep and repair.
Send me some good vibes, if you got them.
More chapters and videos coming as soon as the chaos ebbs.