Remus stood outside the potions room, his shoulder resting on the old door frame, his arms crossed, one finger tapping on his elbow, waiting patiently as students filed out of the classroom. They looked at him inquisitively, as they should, he was new (to them) and even he could admit - not the most teacherly looking.
Once the class was empty, he made his presence known whilst you were busying yourself cleaning up the remnants of ingredients left out on the tables.
"You know," he began, "if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were avoiding me."
You stopped behind a desk, placing down the ingredients into an unused cauldron and wiping away imaginary particles, giving yourself time to reel back any emotion before speaking to him.
"And why is that Professor Lupin?" you inquired, looking up at the unusual professor. The late afternoon sun hitting the silver of his scars.
Remus smiled, it was warm, inviting even but you were not accepting invitations of any sort. Hogwarts was no longer your old haunting ground, it was a means to an end. Perhaps one that would end sooner than you ever imagined.
"You do remember, don't you?" he asked.
"I do...." you sighed quietly, "of course I do," you dipped your eyes from him, a telling sign of a lie, "The first week back to school is always very busy, and with Draco Malfoy pitching a fit about his injury all week and therefore causing a huge pain in the arse for both Dumbledore and S...Professor Snape; I was left with far more work than I had planned for." Not to mention, you were a bit of an arse to Severus...not that that should matter now, you scalded.
"I am sorry to hear that," he said with genuine kindness, and that was all you had ever personally seen from Remus; kindness. "Forgive me, I didn't come with the intention of an inquisition."
"Don't worry about it," you reassured him, packing your bag with a class's worth of parchments and heading towards him. "Professor Snape will be needing the classroom for next period."
Remus held up his hands, "Say no more, that is definitely my cue to leave."
Not wanting to pry any more than he needed, he didn't ask why you kept calling your mutual colleague, and according to a few sources, your significant other, by his teaching name. Remus relished his newfound stability in his life and was only looking to find his place there once again, and form new friendships; if he could.
He stepped in line with you, as you now both made your way up into the life of the castle; Remus endeavoured to make conversation.
"Minerva tells me you practically taught Dark Arts last year...I was wondering if I could get your opinion on tomorrow's class."
"Minerva exaggerates," you waved off, Lockhart's fraud may have come to light in the walls of the school but that's where it ended. To coin a muggle phrase, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and you weren't about to be the whistleblower. "But I am intrigued."
Remus beamed and leaned in slightly closer, away from the prying ears of students who may spoil his surprise. "A Boggart," he gleefully whispered.
"You have one?" You asked, undeniably interested and impressed. The first-week one the job and he was starting with a Boggart. It was a darn sight more impressive than Cornish Pixies; the pupils would both hate it and love it. After the last few years at Hogwarts, the kids could probably do with turning their nightmares into giggles.
"I do," he replied, nodding his head, waiting for your response.
"Start off strong...I like it," you affirmed and that seemed to be all Remus needed. He put his hands into his pockets and smiled to himself as he turned away to a group of rowdy 16-year-olds.
"Shall I report back...tell you how it goes?" he asked as he let the teenagers be, it was harmless fun, no need for any sort of intervention on his part, he thought.
Unsure of his motive to all of this, especially when it came to your opinion, or dare you say it - approval - you poised yourself for neutrality.
"Sure," you answered, "Must dash anyway. Hope all goes well."
"Thank you," he called meekly as you left his side and took a corridor that you actually didn't need to be going down. Poor Remus, he did know better, you were avoiding him but then you were avoiding most people, so it was not unique to him.
*
"Narcissa isn't happy, Severus and when Narcissa isn't happy...she makes sure everybody knows about it. Especially me," Lucius complained, hissing at Severus, who sat at his desk, in his chambers. His reason for being there? Officially, it was to check on his son, who had stupidly egged on a hippogriff, unofficially, it was to force Severus into bringing you to Malfoy Manor, for dinner. An unspoken invitation for an interrogation. This had nothing to do with Narcissa.
"It is not as simple as you make it out to be, Lucius. We simply cannot just leave the school and..."
Lucius was in no playing mood and had little patience for further excuses. "Draco tells me you're acting a little out of sorts, Severus. He's barely seen you two together, and according to him by the end of the last term, you were inseparable. Is there something you need to tell me?"
Severus pursed his lips. He knew the fine line he was treading here.
"I didn't realise Draco took such an interest in my personal affairs," he replied, toning down the pyre of vexation Lucius was lighting inside of him.
Lucius placed the drink he was nursing on the small table near the fire and made his way to Severus' desk. He perched himself on the end like a friend would if they were in normal conversation, but they weren't in normal conversation. They never were.
"Severus...everyone takes interest in your personal affairs, especially those that take place within these walls," his blonde brow raised, "I need not remind you of that. I also need not remind you of the possible measures that would have to be taken...if a certain someone knew a little too much...without being trustworthy."
It was a threat, one that Severus had been waiting for and ultimately dreading. It was folly to fall in love he told himself, repeatedly. As lonely as his existence was, eyes were everywhere.
"I'll make the arrangements," Severus conceded, sitting back in his chair; how he was ever going to persuade you to go was unfathomable but it was necessary.
"Good. I'll see you on Friday night then."
"I might need more time than that..."
"Friday night, Severus." Lucius finished sternly. There was no room for negotiation.
Lucius stood and sauntered out of his chambers as if he owned them. Severus had followed, locking the door behind him.
The potions professor panicked. You'd barely shared a few words and those were nothing, meaningless exchanges about classes. Of course, nobody was wise to what had happened, that you were no longer together. Severus has been convincing enough when telling those who dared to pry in his affairs that professionalism was agreed between the two of you and until you told anyone different, which you didn't seem to be doing, he was keeping his mouth shut and his door shut firmer.
His large hand grabbed the back of the chair where Lucius had sat, meandering around the conversation he was really there to have for half an hour. The fire's reflection danced on the shine of the glass, untouched by Lucius because what Severus had to offer clearly wasn't up to standard. Severus grabbed the glass, clenched his hand around it but before he let himself envisage it as Lucius' neck he threw it at the fire. The flames erupted in the fireplace from the touch of alcohol and gave colour to the black of his eyes.
*
Later that night, with little time to dwell on his predicament, for Friday night was just two days away, Severus, under the cover of darkness swept across the hallway from his own quarters to yours.
His knock was hesitant but loud enough. Your quill stopped abruptly, leaving an unsightly blot of ink on Cho Chang's assignment. There was no obligation to open the door to him, you could carry on, you told yourself, lifting your quill from the parchment. And if he asked in the future? Which was unlikely, then...well, you were sleeping or out.
"I know you're in there, y/n," he spoke behind the slab of wood that kept you apart. He was upset about something, that much was clear.
Dropping the quill back into the ink, you stood slowly, quietly, and inevitably tip-toed your way to the door.
Patiently he stood and waited for your decision. Were you going to let him in or not? Were you even going to open the door? When the door did start to creak open, Severus braced himself for the worst. The look on your face near devastated him because it was so far from what he was used to. There was no spark, no smile, nothing. Just a blank slate. Severus' years of masking meant you were looking at a similar blank expression.
"It's late," you began, readying yourself to turn him away.
"It's important," he whispered, then looked over his shoulder, down the hallway, making sure no one from Slytherin house had absconded from their dormitories, "Lucius." He looked again, "I can't talk about it out here. Can I please come in?"
"Is that wise?" You asked solemnly.
"I'll stay at the door...I...I won't move," he promised.
There was no reply from you but he could see you thinking about it. As difficult as it was, it felt so good to be close to you, just the two of you. Even if you hated him.
Stepping away from the doorway, you walked over to your desk, leaving Severus standing at the threshold. He was waiting for your permission as you sat at the edge of your desk. Stretching, you looked down at your work, which had given you a crick in your neck, and then addressed him.
"Okay." Folding your arms over your stomach, you decided to listen.
"Thank you," he stepped in and closed the door. He then stood still, the back of his black shoes clipping the wood.
"So," you sighed, already feeling anxious, "Lucius?"
Severus' hand raised to his face, his large pale palm rubbing down his stubbled skin, quite sure he was going to be sick. "Lucius has instructed...demanded that we go to the Manor on Friday under the guise that Narcissa wants to meet you."
The nervous laugh that escaped your mouth was a shock to both of you.
"I know...y/n, I know but if I told him the truth, I may as well feed you to the lions myself," his head lulled back into the door, his eyes looked to the dark stone ceiling.
"So what does he actually want?"
"I don't know for sure but...Draco has talked to him...about us and neither of us can deny that he is a threat. That you aren't safe. And you were never were with me but there's nothing I can do about that now."
You moved from your perch on the desk and sat in your desk chair, contemplating the situation. It wouldn't surprise Severus if you told him to go fuck himself, you knew that - he knew that - but Lucius was a dangerous man. A dangerous man with possible answers for you.
"That night," Severus had no intention of bringing it up but now he was here, he felt it was the only thing he could say as he stood there in silence, his gaze fixed at the cracking cement between the stones.
"Severus don't..." you shook thinking about it.
"It was wrong, so very wrong..."
"Severus..."
"But it doesn't feel right. Something doesn't feel right," he tried to look you in the eye but he couldn't, "I still don't understand."
His vision was drawn to your hand raising, his continued speech stuttering to a stop.
"It's very simple. I came looking for you, you didn't want to be found and because you're so hell-bent on Sirius, you took it out on me. There, nice and easy for you."
"I wasn't in my right mind," he tried to excuse his behaviour but he knew it would fail.
"I'm not going to scream and shout at you. I'll come Friday, I'll play my part but only because I have a reason to save my own arse."
Severus knew what you were saying. It was not a favour to him.
Glancing at him briefly, he was tired, paler, gaunter and he needed a haircut. But those were his problems.
"You can go now."
Severus clenched his jaw, stopping himself from saying anything else, and swiftly left.