SEBASTIAN
I roll my sleeves, trying to button them underneath my doctor coat. I rest my elbows on the desk, glancing at the watch on my wrist.
7:55.
She will come. I know she will.
The knock on the door snaps me, but I know it's not her. She would never knock. If not she would probably kick the door and march in telling me that she hates coming here, so to finish this as soon as possible.
Ava walks in, smiling kindly at me. I return it and stretch my hands to take the coffee that she is bringing.
"Ugh, you are a life saver, honestly!", I groan, wrapping my arms around the warm cup. "Your coffee always wakes me up from dead."
She chuckles, tilting her head, "Isn't it like that, dr. Tomlinson?"
"Ugh", I groan again, "will you ever break that habit of calling me, doctor?"
"But isn't that what you are?" She raises her eyebrow, and I take a sip of the black coffee. Amazing. She tugs the black strand of the hair that escaped her long tight ponytail that swings with each step she takes and honestly my head hurts from how tight it is. I don't know if hers hurts too.
"I am, but...", my sentence gets cut off by Conor's abrupt entrance.
"Avaaaa", he drags her name, groaning, and falls straightaway on the sofa next to the desk. "Coffee, please. I'm dying."
I scoff, shaking my head, glancing at the kind nurse who just laughs, already used to this. This happens... well, let's say, every week at least.
"Dying", my best friend murmurs, waving his arm in the air, weakly, as if he had a white flag in sign of surrendering, "such a terrible hangover."
"Conor!", I exclaim, and he jumps from the bed immediately.
"Yes, yes, yes?" He turns around confused, not realizing what the hell is going on.
"Why did you party the whole night again?"
"I didn't", he lies, rubbing his eyes like a child. Ava lets out a short laugh, and my lips curl in a grin, too, when I look at her briefly, seeing how she is covering her mouth.
"Then what happened?"
"Oh, so many things, Seb", he smirks, amused. "But you wouldn't like to know."
"I bet I wouldn't", I mutter under my breath. "Here take it." I hand Ava my coffee mug so she can give it to him. "Ava will make me another one, okay?"
"Of course, d.... Sebastian", she corrects herself just when I open my mouth to scold her, and she smiles nicely.
"Oh", Conor grunts, "thank you bro. I owe you, but", he slurps the coffee, moaning and licking his thin lips that are lost in the beard, "don't you owe me, actually?"
"I don't owe you anything."
Ava's eyes dance between us two, trying to understand what are talking about, so I turn to her, explaining:
"Conor and I made a bet about that girl who came yesterday. I know, sick, but it wasn't my idea." I lift my arms in the air, justifying. "I swear."
"I know who here likes to gamble, don't worry Sebastian", she assures me, and smirks, turning to Conor. He snaps her eyes at her, boring them in hers the way he does when he seduces women, and she immediately averts the gaze, pink shade covering her cheeks.
"Of course you do, Ava, don't you, now?", he teases her, wiggling his eyebrows and I frown, darting my eyes between him and her, noticing some kind of weird energy, connection really, if not even chemistry.
Unfortunately, she has a thing for Dan. Haven't you seen how she eyes him?
Jealous. Conor is jealous. Ava turned him down for Dan, and now he is angry, disappointed, and if not even sad.
"I-I will go and make you another coffee, dr. Tomlinson", a possible victim of my best friend's rebellious behavior stammers.
I don't even correct her this time, understanding why she again calls me professionally, so I just nod gesturing for her that she can go, and she does, turning on her heel, and her long ponytail sways. Her white uniform hangs perfectly on her curves, and I look at Conor, resting my chin on my palms, seeing how he ogles her ass, parting his lips. Ava closes the door slowly, but not before she sends him one last look biting her lips shly or... seducely, I'm not quite sure is she as innocent as she seems.
"Okay, enough looking", I warn my best friend, "she left."
He turns to me with parted lips, his eyelids heavy, threatening to close any second, and the dark circles covering most of his face.
"You look terrible, Conor, what happened?"
I'm always honest with him, I won't ever lie to him that he looks okay when he clearly doesn't. The only thing I need now is for him to finally tell me what's been going on with him lately.
"What aren't you telling me?"
"Nothing!", he snaps, grunting and rubbing his face aggressively. "I had some rough night, had wild sex, woke up on my left leg, that's it!"
"I don't understand why are you hiding from me. Hey, me, Conor!"
"You stop shouting", he roars, shaking his head and covering his ears. "My head hurts so much. Jeez, have you ever had a hangover? "
"I have", I say, "when we finished our senior year. It was you who made me drink."
"Oh, please", he makes a sour face, "and you haven't had any since then?"
I stay quiet, knowing he'll understand.
"Jeez, you boring!"
He gets up, turning around the room as if he's asking for something. His glance falls on the floor near the bookshelf the pieces of the vase Esther broke were shattered.
"You are a grown-up man, Conor. You have to act mature. What will your father say when he finds..."
"You won't tell him a word!", he hisses, turning back to me, pointing the finger at me in a threatening way.
I scowl, tilting my head, ready to argue, but the door opens and we both snap our heads to it.
Esther? Is it Esther?
No, it's Ava. She looks at us, confused as if she indeed can sense that we were in the middle of an argument. Maybe she heard us, who knows. I smile politely at her after she gives me the coffee, thanking her. Without any word she walks away, glancing at Conor who keeps his head bowed, not wanting to look at her.
"So, when is this feisty girl supposed to come today?" He rubs his temples, still standing on his feet. "When was the time you told her to come?"
"At..."
I glance at my wrist watch.
8:07.
"Eight."
"Oh, I see that she's not coming, then. Good, hand me ten dollars." He opens and closes his palm signaling for me to put money in it.
"Easy", I shake my head, "she could be late. Stuck in traffic. Just late."
"Or just not coming."
"Give her some time. And you should go fresh up. I think that you have patients, too." I cock my eyebrow, grinning.
"Ugh, work. I hate working this early in the morning. Who can even function at this time? Let alone talk about their mental health issues?"
He keeps muttering under his breath as he walks out, waving his hand through the air, swaying.
I sigh, and once again check the clock.
8:10
Five more minutes. I have a feeling like she'll come at 8:15. Yeah, fifteen minutes of being late sound just like her.
And what do you know about her actually, Sebastian? My mind asks me.
Well, I know that she's aggressive, that she hates everything, might as well put that in the first place, and well....
See, nothing.
I didn't have time to look into her last night, because I came pretty late after I had spent some time at the shelter, and thank God, they made me stay longer since they know how much I enjoy spending time with animals.
Okay, maybe I didn't look into her, because I didn't want to. I wanted to have no judgment when I look at her and seeing what other doctors have written about her may destroy the personal image I'm trying to make off her in my mind.
The door opens and I snap my eyes to them, opening my mouth, surprised, a slight grin, but more like a smile appearing on my lips.
Esther. Please let it be her. She came.
"Esthe...."
"Dr. Tomlinson, I'm so sorry, but I had to come, I know that we don't have an appointment and I..."
The red-haired woman who is sniffling, her face covered with dark circles, and her eyes puffy and bloodshot enters the room like a tornado, walking to my desk.
She's no Esther. She's Wendy.
"Wendy?" I blink rapidly, puzzled, and clear my throat, trying to forget about Esther and focus on my patient who clearly needs me, and is willing to work on her problems, after what she, of course, acknowledged them.
I don't need Esther to come to me if she doesn't want to. I won't look into her. But I'm sure one day she will realize what a mistake she had made by refusing my help.
"Wendy, tell me what's wrong. What happened? Did your date go bad?"
"No, n-no, I..." She bursts into tears, and I get up immediately to help her sit down.
"Sit, here, sit", I instruct, leading her to the couch where minutes ago Conor was sitting.
She puts her bag down and covers her face with her hands, sobbing. I clear my throat, trying to think of something that could calm her down.
"Hey, Wendy", I take her hand, removing it from her face, and she looks at me, sniffling, "tell me what happened."
"I-I w-was...", she stammers, and I shush her.
"Shhh, calm down first. You have to calm down. I promise you whatever is happening I can help you. Now calm down."
I get up slightly to grab the cup with water and hand it to her, so she takes it and drinks it slowly still shaking. Once she finishes it, I take it from her trembling hands.
"Better now, hm?"
She nods and wipes her face, so I grab the box of tissues, as well, and she smiles at me, her eyes still watering.
"T-thanks."
After she wipes her nose, I tell her to explain to me what has happened that made her so upset.
"I-I..."
"Calmly and slowly."
"Okay." She takes a deep breath. "My date was... f-fine, I guess. I think that he isn't my type, but h-he did-dn't do a-a-anything."
"Okay, so? " I hand her one more tissue, and she wipes her eyes.
"My e-e-ex. My ex", she tries to repeat it with stammering but I already know why she can't do it.
"Okay, your ex. Where is he? Did he hurt you? What happened?"
She shakes her head, sniffling. "He didn't hurt me. But he got out of jail, and and and..."
"Shhh", I console her, hesitating whether to take her hand and would that be professional. I decide against it because not only that it isn't professional but it could upset her more. "He cannot hurt you, he has a restraining ord..."
"He threatened me!", she snaps and I part my lips. Guess he can hurt her, but I won't let that happen.
"How did he thre...."
"He put several notes on my door, and he wrote... he wrote..."
"What did he write?"
"That I would pay and so many more things", she bursts into tears, again. "I'm so scared, Sebastian."
I pat her shoulder, not wanting to tempt her, realizing that she called me by my first name. Must be due to fear.
"Wendy", I say softly and she looks at me, uncovering her face. "I won't let him hurt you, you have to trust me, okay?" She nods, using the same tissue I gave her to wipe her red nose. Unlike yesterday, she does not have any red lipstick and her ginger hair is messily tied into a ponytail.
"B-but maybe he saw me with Ed."
"Even if that is a case, you still don't get to worry. I will make some calls and you will be safe, I promise. Maybe you will have to be in the safe house for a few weeks until we make sure that he will not disturb you."
She nods, wiping the tears off her cheeks. She doesn't have a choice. She lives alone in this city, and she came here to study but left the university because of her ex who managed to convince her that she didn't need any knowledge and that wasn't what women should do. So, now she barely has a place to live, and paying rent is so hard for her since she hardly succeeded in getting a job after she pulled herself together with my help and sessions.
"Come on, now, go fresh..."
"Bro!"
The door opens abruptly and Wendy startles. I don't have to look at it to know that was Conor to probably came here to demand money from our gambling.
"Conor not now!", I hiss turning my head to him but confuse when I see his eyes already focused on Wendy's back that is shaking from how hard she is sobbing.
"Wait, wait, is that..." He approaches us, and before I can tell him not to say or do anything and especially not to touch her, he is on his knees in front of my ginger patient.
"Conor don't..."
"Why is this gorgeous ginger princess crying, hm?", he asks, playfully, but I sense softness behind his smile. Wendy slowly takes her hands from her face, and I notice that she still has red nail polish that she probably wanted to match with her lipstick yesterday for her date. "Hey, those pretty eyes shouldn't be crying, should they?"
I see how Wendy blushed, biting her lower lip. Maybe Conor's charm is something both I and Wendy need now.
"I... I, um...."
"Oh, no, no", the brown-haired therapist tsks, "calm down now, sweety, okay?" He gets up and hisses in my ear, "Move, Seb!"
"But, I... you shouldn't..."
He literally pushes me with his body and I almost fall off the couch, pulling my doctor coat.
"Wendy, your name's Wendy, right?"
My patient nods shakily, and I lean on my desk, not wanting to leave them alone just to see how she will react to this kind of gesture. I can't deny, Conor is sweet and kind. He can be that, though when he wants, although I know that he can be rough, as well when he wants to be that. But now, seeing him with Wendy, holding her shaky hands in his large ones, I don't know I don't think that I've ever seen him like this. Trying to console some girl. In college, they would cry after him, chase him, or yell at him for saying how he only used them, and he wouldn't even turn, nor glance at them, only mind his own business. And no matter how many times I would tell him to apologize or to say something, anything, he would just shrug and say:
They had sex with me, too, I didn't have sex with myself. So, they agreed to do that, now they have to suffer the consequences. I am not a guy for relationships, nor do I fall in love. If they did, that's too bad.
But, I also know now that he has some thing with Ava, or had, I don't know, so I have to try hard to discover what is that my best friend is hiding. He would always tell me everything, even when we would be chased by the girls who would throw his clothes, or something else, yelling, shouting, sobbing, and we would have to run as fast as we could to save our asses.
"Shh, Wendy, it's okay, dear. I will fight everyone who dares to touch you, okay?"
Wendy gasps and a sob escapes her mouth, and I don't know if she gasped because of Conor's confession that took me off guard, too, or is she just still upset.
Before I can find out the real reason, she does something that surprises me so much. She throws her arms around Conor's neck and falls into his chest, squeezing him tightly.
For months she's been telling me how it was hard for her to let someone touch her even when her colleague would accidentally brush her shoulder and now... Now this. I'm partly confused.
"Don't let him hurt me again, please", she murmurs in his chest. Conor snaps his eyes at me, and I raise my eyebrow, shrugging. As soon as he averts his gaze from mine, he hugs Wendy back. "I don't want to go back t-to him."
"You won't, honey, you won't. See, Sebastian and I..." He pulls her away, and she reluctantly lets go of him, her arms still holding him as if she wanted to be held by him a little longer, "we will take care of you, okay. There is no one that can pass between us and hurt you. Understood?"
"Y-yes."
He brings his hand to stroke her hair, but stops, and drops it to her shoulder instead. He looks in the corner of his eye, and I know that he is restraining himself because I'm here. Otherwise, he would caress her and act much softer. But knowing that I would probably nag at him and mention his outburst of feelings, he chooses not to show them.
"C-Conor", Wendy calls him.
"Tell me, sweetheart." He offers her a small smile, half-grin and this is the best every girl could get from him. Either grin, either half-smile, never full smile, let alone honest laugh, merely pure sarcastic cackle.
"Why are you... Why do you look so tired?"
Oh, Wendy. You shouldn't have asked him, that, but to be honest, I am curious to see what he is about to answer.
Conor glances at me, and I raise my eyebrow once again, sending him a glance that says, tell her now that you partied the whole night, and fucked someone raw.
"I... I'm", he averts his gaze, dropping his hands from her shoulders, "yeah, I'm tired, Wendy. But you don't have to worry about it, dear."
"But, I do worry, you look always so mad, and n-now..."
"Now what?", he snaps and I widen my eyes, trying to send him a glare to tell him not to yell at her. She is traumatized enough. Wendy doesn't even startle for some reason. "I mean", Conor shakes his head, "I just need to get some sleep, that's all. Now off you go, we will finish everything."
Wendy surprises him, and me more by throwing herself onto him once again. My colleague frowns, but hugs her, again, and I catch how he caressed her long ponytail, and sniffed her hair, closing his eyes to inhale the scent when he buries his head into her neck briefly.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
He pulls her away slowly and she frowns, but blushes and bites her lip. "Sorry", she apologizes, smiling sheepishly looking so cute.
"It's okay", he smiles again weakly and I'm starting to think if he was ever like this with Ava or any other woman, but I can't remember. I think no.
He has never cared for any woman's feelings. No tears, no smile, laugh, only sex, and sometimes even not that since he is super picky. Though when he isn't in a mood or drunk he goes with any girl. But really any. Trust me been there done that. I mean not me, I... I mean saw him doing that and had a hard time trying to think him out of it. Didn't succeed though.
"Do you need something to calm down?", I ask my patient.
"Um", she glances at Conor as if she's asking for his permission. He shakes his head, and so does she. "I'm good."
"Yeah, I think that she is okay now. Let's go finish that so our ginger princess here is out of danger", he gets up and winks at her, so she smiles, blushing all over again. Pink cheeks are such a contrast on the brownish-greenish eyes she has filled with tears.
I prepare to leave too, but stop abruptly when I see Wendy taking Conor's hand stopping him from walking. He snaps his eyes at her, confused, frowning after glancing at her hand holding his.
"Thank you so much."
"Mhm", he hums, pulling his hand from her palm, nodding, "no problem." He turns on his heel and gestures for me to go. "Let's go."
After half an hour of making calls, police, safe house and God knows whom we finished everything, and Wendy's best friend came to take her to the safe house, but not before I made sure that they have someone to escort them in case her ex was waiting for her to be alone.
Conor and I stand in front of the window in my office as we watch Wendy's friend helping her to walk downstairs. The same window I was watching Esther yesterday when she spits the medicine and got lost. Maybe I'll never see her again who knows.
Haven't you, Sebastian said yourself that she would come crawling to you?
Maybe I have. But I don't know, maybe our paths won't cross. Maybe she will find some other therapist or just continue hurting herself from inside.
Wendy turns her head to us knowing that she can see my office from downstairs and waves, smiling happily before she gets in the car, her best friend helping her do so. Conor smiles showing his teeth, waving sweetly at her, too and I am confused not knowing if the smile was honest or fake.
The thing with him is that you never know when he is happy and when not. And even being his best friend for years I still can't decipher what he wants me to see and what is happening inside of his heart because he is a manipulator and an excellent one, already been doing that for years, using it both on men and women, his family, his friends, even me. There was a time when it was making me angry but I passed that, learning that I just have to stick by his side and that itself was enough for him. I'm patiently waiting for the day he would open to me. As to a therapist or a friend, I don't mind.
I turn to him and his smile dies immediately replaced by the frown that makes his forehead wrinkle and his face look ten years older with all those layers of dark circles that not even Ava's coffee could help to.
"Don't say a word", he hisses, beating me before I can say a word let alone open my mouth. "I will take a free day."
"But you can't..."
"My dad is a headmaster I can do whatever I want."
"Was a headmaster", I correct him grinning although knowing that he already has an answer to that, too.
"Same thing. Still means I can rest for the day. And night", he adds.
I lift my hands surrendering, shaking my head and he turns on his heel approaching the door when he sees that Wendy safely went into the car of her best friend.
I sigh when he closes the door. At least he forgot about our gamble and mon...
"Don't you think that I forgot about our gamble!", he shouts snapping the door open abruptly that I startle slightly. I chuckle, shaking my head. He hits the door close and leaves for good. Heading to a bar probably where else would my Conor go?
Okay, gamble or no gamble she didn't come. That's it. I was wrong, and my best friend was right. But what concerns me more is that my inner feeling was wrong and usually that's never a case.
Note: I think Grammarly only makes my English worse