Wednesday September 1st
I walk out of my dressing room ready to go home. I see Silvia standing by the exit when I get closer. What's she doing here?
She smiles when she sees me. "I was waiting for you to get done, I have something I want to talk to you about."
I look behind me to make sure she's talking to me because what could she possibly want to talk to me about.
"Ok." I try not to sound surprised.
She starts walking towards the studios exit and I follow behind her. I take my phone out to text Aurora that I'll probably be late and why.
When we get outside and I'm still following her she starts talking. "Are you settling in nicely, you've been here for two months now right?"
"Yeah, everything's great."
"That's good. I watched your interview and it's none of my business but something tells me you lied." She smirks.
"Yeah I did because I didn't want to out Aurora."
"I heard a rumor that the McCrees daughter came out as a lesbian."
I smile. "That's true, that happened shortly after the interview."
"That's what I thought plus Ariel has to be your daughter. She looks just like you when you were her age." She smiles as if that's a normal thing to say. How does she know what I looked like?
"What do you mean?" I start walking slower and frown.
She gets serious. "That's what I really wanted to talk with you about." She sighs and hesitates. "I think I might be your mother."
I stop walking, she stops as well. "Why would you think that?"
She zips open her wallet she's carrying then takes out what looks like a picture. She gives it to me. "Is that not you?"
I look at the picture there is no denying that is two year old me with the couple that adopted me. I have the same picture. My black hair was short but my eyes were the same bright green. It does look just like Ari.
"Watching your interview only confirmed my suspicions. I wasn't sure it was you at first because I thought I had a son. But the thought did cross my mind when we met at that party. I thought I was looking in a mirror. Ariel looks just like that picture. When I said you reminded me of someone I was talking about her."
I look at her as the gears in my head turn.
She's a model with a net worth of a billion dollars and she gave her child up for adoption. What kind of fucked up logic is that?
I frown still looking at the picture feeling my anger turn into hurt. Was it just me? Why didn't she want me?
I ignore the burning sensation in my throat. "You gave me up." I whisper in a cracked voice still looking at the photo. "Why? Why didn't you want me?" I blink away the tears wanting to fall before looking at her.
"I promise it had nothing to do with you. I just didn't want a child at 16, I was a child myself. I had dreams, I wanted to make it big in the modeling industry and as stupid as it sounds I felt like a child would hold me back. I had no idea who your father was because it was a one night stand at a New Years Eve Party. I was drunk and couldn't remember a thing. I didn't want to be a mother so I gave you up to the Echave's couple. Their names were Diego and Martha, like you said in the interview. They wanted a child but couldn't have one of their own. They did agree to send me a picture of you every year but after the second year those stopped. I tried contacting them but they never answered and now I know why. But I just assumed at the time that they didn't want to anymore, you were their child not mine. I gave away my rights. I'm sorry, It was a mistake. When I finally became an A-list celebrity the fame that came with it went to my head and I shut everybody out for years, my friends, and my family. I've never even dated. I feel like I don't deserve to have a family because I gave you up."
At this point, the tears I'd been trying to hold in won.
"I understand if you don't want me around I just thought you should know and I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. But I would love to get to know you better and hope you will forgive me. I hate that you weren't happy like I hoped. I thought about you a lot. Giving you away is one of my biggest regrets because I can't get those years of yours I missed back." She sniffles.
I feel like I should be more angry but I'm more hurt. At least I know it wasn't because of me.
But would I want any different? If she would have kept I most likely wouldn't have the family I have now. Aurora and Ari are my world. I wouldn't want it any different and It's not like she had the intention of giving me a shitty life, so I do forgive her. I want to get to know her to.
I wipe my tears and she does the same with hers. "I forgive you and I'd like to get to know you too." I hand the picture back to her.
She smiles. "You don't know how happy that makes me." She puts the picture back in her wallet. "We can go somewhere and chat, we have a lot to catch up on, do you have a place in mind?"
"There's a Starbucks nearby."
"Good choice." She starts walking and I follow beside her.
"Did you try to find my dad?" I ask.
"Yes. My friend that was with me at the time told me that I mentioned a guy named Jules before I disappeared. The only thing I remembered were green eyes. But I asked people that had been at the party if they knew a guy named Jules and nobody did. Some of them said they only knew a girl named Jules from the party."
Girl? "Is it possible that it was a girl and she was like me?"
"Intersex? I never considered that. It was 1997 Monterrey not many people knew what intersex was. It's possible I guess although I'm not attracted to women. But who knows." She shrugs.
"Do you know who threw the party?"
I want to find this Jules. If Ari would have grown up without me knowing about her I would have wanted her to find me.
She raises a questioning brow. "We didn't know the person who threw the party but everybody knew it was the Mercardo's house."
"Mercardo, like the Designer brand?"
She nods. "The only Mercardo I knew about was Francisco Mercardo, the owner. I'd heard he had a teenage daughter at the time but I didn't know her name because he didn't flaunt his family to the public. It probably was her that threw the party."
Interesting. I get an idea.
I take my phone out and do quick google search for the owner of Mercardo. I was gonna try to find his daughters name because she's an adult now. So surely her identity isn't a secret anymore.
"No mames." I mumble under my breath when Jules Ivy Mercardo shows up.
I search the name by itself and go to images clicking on the first picture of her.
Her style is masculine, the opposite of me. She could definitely be mistaken for a man by a very drunk women. Her hair is short and slicked back in this photo and she's wearing a suit. She has bright green eyes the same shade as mine.
I find and article on her. According to the article is was only a few years ago when she came out of the shadows and claimed her father's business when he died of a heart attack.
She even has a wiki page. Her mom, Juliet is British. She's 40 as of today. 1 year older than Silvia. I wonder if she's intersex. It doesn't say.
I turn my phone to Silvia who was already clearly wondering what I was doing by the look on her face.
"Does she look familiar?"
Silvia looks at the photo and gasps. "Those eyes."
"Her name is Jules Mercardo. So you think this is the person?" I ask.
"I don't know, those eyes are the only thing I remember." She says.
****
Me and Silvia talked for hours. I'm just now leaving the Starbucks at 6:23.
As I walk home I try to come up with a way to contact Jules.
I talked to Silvia about Jules who could possibly be my other mother and I looked up more stuff on her. She lives in London and has a house in Monterrey as well.
She's single but has a 6 year old son named Jayden from a previous marriage. I found a picture of them together. He has really curly black hair and dark brown eyes. I he clearly resembles her quite a bit although he's a few shades darker than her and me. I'm sure he gets that from his other mom.
I couldn't find anything about her being intersex there isn't much about her in general.
I don't know how I'm supposed to contact her. It seems like my options are go to London or send her a letter. I doubt she would answer to a phone call or text and that's if I can even find her number. She's famous.
I call Aurora to let her know I'm coming home now. She called me earlier to make sure I was ok.
"I'm coming now."
"What did you guys talk about?"
Everything.
"I'll tell you when I get home." I hear Ari in the background asking to talk to me.
"Ok. Ari wants to talk to you, you're on speaker."
"Ok."
"Mamá." Ari says.
"What Mija?" I smile.
"Are you coming?"
I chuckle. "Yes, I'm on my way right now."
"I need you to hurry."
"Why?" I ask.
"Because I miss you." She's so cute.
"Me too." Aurora inputs.
"I was gone for three extra hours it wasn't that long."
"Yes It was." Ari says.
"I agree. I'm about to start cooking. Do you have any request?" Me and Ari usually help her cook. I'll be there in time to help if she starts now.
"No, make whatever you want, I know it will be good. I'll help when I get back." I tell Aurora.
"Ok. I love you." Aurora says.
Before I can reply Ari whines in frustration. "No byes! I wanna talk until she's back."
"Ok I'm sorry, you can, but I'm gonna start cooking."
"No, wait. Please."
Aurora chuckles. "Ok."
"We don't have to say byes yet." Ari says into the phone.
I shake my head in amusement. "Ok, then tell me what you did today."
She tells me everything her and Aurora did until I get home.
****
"Then when we got home mommy played LEGOs with me."
"She made me play for hours." Aurora adds.
"I believe that." I chuckle as I come up to the door. "I'm here."
"Ok."
I hang up and unlock the door.
Ari's already standing at the door when I open it. I step in and close it behind me.
"Hey Mija." I pick her up and kiss her.
"You took too long." She says.
"I'm sorry."
I walk to the couch where Aurora's laying down. I put Ari down and she goes to get her tablet. I go to the couch, move Aurora's feet and put them on my lap when I sit down.
"What did you and Silvia talk about?" She asks.
Ari comes back to me with her tablet. "Mommy move your feet, please." She tries to move them.
Aurora moves them and sits up. Ari climbs onto my lap to watch her tablet.
"She's my mom."
Her eyes widen. "What?"
"She's my birth mother. Long story short she had me when she was 16 and gave me up because she didn't want a child." She grabs my hand.
"And you're ok?" Her face holds concern.
I nod.
"What about your dad?"
"She doesn't know who it is, I was the result of a drunk one night stand. But I have an idea." I take my phone and google Jules again. Then I hand Aurora the phone.
"I can see it, the nose, eye color, and jawline. But Silvia basically copy and pasted you into this world. Are you gonna contact her?" She asks
I shrug. "My only options are going to London or sending her a letter."
"London?" She repeats.
"Yeah thats where she lives with her family."
"I think you should send her a letter explaining everything and put your number in the letter so she can call you."
"Yeah I'll do that. I don't even know if she's intersex."
"You'll find out."
"Yeah, if she replies." My mood simmers a little at the thought.
Aurora kisses me on the lips making me feel a little better.
"I'm sure she will. I was thinking we could make tamales." She changes the subject.
I smile. "Sure, I haven't had that in a while."