Kinza's pov
I brush my finger tips against Ayaan's nose which is few centimetre away from mine. Enjoying the closeness I admire him closely as much as I want like a creep since he is in deep sleep and there is less chances of me getting caught.
His features looking softer than a baby from up close, my eyes falling upon his lips, those addicting one which only knows to show how much he loves me.
After the bold stunt I pulled out yesterday with a trembling heart, I feel so much better today. I love him, I know that, and I wanted him to know that too. That's why I thought It's the right time to say him.
I guess that is my first ever decision in my 20 years of life, which I do not regret.
I know he loves me but he feels awkward in saying that and I am fine by that, I can give him as much as time he wants to make him feel comfortable and say those words which I am sure will do many things to my heart.
He is not someone who expresses, hell he does not even talk to his parents with more than two sentences for a whole day...but when he is with me, he listens to my rubbish and patiently answers which is something very shocking to Ayaan's mom, cause one day she heard him blabbering things and laughing with me on something which is not at all a topic to be discussed about and that day I literally saw tears of regret in her eyes because she also wants her son to be playful and talkative just as he is behind this doors in the room with me, she regret being away from him and sending him abroad from when he was kid. But we can't do anything now just can wait for him to change or go on with how he is.
I run my fingers through his hair brushing them behind "Wake up husband wake up" I whisper in his ear and a smile automatically forms on his lips, he hums and pulls me closer "We are not here to sleep, are we? Get up and let's go somewhere" I play with his earlobe which is surprising cold.
"Few more hours Kinza" he mumbles and I roll my eyes at his truthiness, he knew he will not wake up in five minutes so he directly said the truth without bothering to give me fake hope.
"I want to go out" I mumble and when he hears that he opens his eyes, he rubs his eyes and again wraps his arm around my waist to pull me closer. I don't remember cuddling to him like this before, I love this and I wish he could do the same back in Jiddah without waking me up like a Mother everyday.
"We are staying for a week sweetheart, you can visit as much as places you want, for now let me sleep" he again closes his eyes and snuggles closer in the crook of my neck, and I control the urge of smacking his head, didn't want to end up on the ground with sore butt in the morning.
Not feeling sleepy at all I admire the ceiling and wait for him to again fall in a deep slumber.
When I hear his breathing getting normal and even, I carefully hold his hand to remove it from my waist and quietly I slip out of the bed.
"That was a difficult task" wiping my fake sweat from my forehead and letting out a deep breath as if I have just solved the most difficult clue. I stand beside the bed with my hands on my waist.
"What should we do now?" Speaking to myself is fun "you are independent women, you can go out but I don't know how independent the men's out here our and I don't want to get into any trouble...hmm so I guess I should order something unhealthy and vibe on some song. Yup let do that!" I March towards the washroom to get freshen up after admiring the washroom again and after solving the difficult maths in the washroom which has alien taps and showers that made me stand there and look at it for few seconds not knowing how to operate it but then I remember my tutor husband teaching and after using my little mind and after remembering all the studies he taught me yesterday I take a very good slow bath.
I know exaggerate alot, and I am deeply sorry for that.
"Bismillah" I flop on this comfortable couch which has taken my heart, soul and what else? Mind, love excetra excetra...It's unbelievably comfy. After seeing this couch I am staring to believe in love at first sight.
While laying on this baby I open the instructions book "Call 324, to order the food..hmm hmm" I stand up and quickly walk towards my room to take my phone, I am so hungry! Gonna order the whole canteen.
I check the number twice before dialing it, why can't all have such small number instead of 10 to 12 numbers.
I press the phone against my ear only to hear that professional women saying "The number you have dialed is invalid please check the number you have dialed" What the—I quickly trace my eyes on the number I have typed and which is written on the book. I have dialed it correctly!! Why are they lying?! I am hungry!
I again try and that same irritating voice speaks killing my mood early in the morning.
Feeling so irritated I walk towards our room and without caring I jump on the bed, forgetting the fact that I was being so careful few seconds ago.
Ayaan who is lightest sleeper wakes up with only one stir, he hums and opens his eye "I am hungry" I literally whine feeling like I will die out of frustration after seeing the menu which has delicious food.
"Order something" he speaks in his low deep sleepy voice "They gave me some wrong number! I dialed but that women is saying there is no such number so stop calling" I lay on top of him to wake him up sudden feeling affectionate and cozy near him.
He hums and lays flat so I can stay comfortably on top of him, he places his hand on my lower back gently caressing it.
He stays silent for few seconds probably waking up from his sleep and I do not show any mercy but disturb him.
"Let me try...give the phone" he asks for me and I quickly hand my phone to him, he raises his eyebrow and looks at his hand which has my phone "you were calling from this phone?" I quickly nod truthfully "Hey it has balance!" I tell him but he pokes his tongue in his inner cheek and chuckles slowly.
I feel so dumb, why is he laughing? he holds my body by my hips and slides to the side so I do not fall and opens the front drawer to take out a phone which looks like those walkie talkie which Abbu buys me after my continuous nagging when we go to the beach—but the only difference is that this does not have any Disney pics like the one my Abbu buys for me.
"This looks like those small toy phone that abbu buys" I snatch that from his hold to examine this new plastic phone.
"Call from this phone, tell me the number" I quickly sit up and rush out to go pick that thin book where the number and the menu is.
" It is 324" he sits up and rests his head on the headboard but dials the number and it rings out loud even without pressing the speaker button but on first place I can't even any buttons except few.
"Good Morning, Room service here Sir, What would you like to order" I grin when I here that professional voice "Good Morning, I would like to have some coffee and.." he looks at me with raised eyebrow asking me to give the list so I scoot closer to say it myself "white sauce pasta, chicken pizza and um burger and lemonade thankyou!!" I feel so energetic today! I look at Ayaan who is looking at me with wide eyes.
"Sorry Sir/ Maam can you repeat the order please" before I could snatch the phone away Ayaan speak "A cup of coffee, white sauce pasta and lemonade" I look at him with wide eyes when he excludes many things, how dare he?!
"Wait—" before I could protest he stops me in talking further by pressing his finger against my lips and glaring at me with those eyes which are silently telling me to shutup.
"Would you please tell us your room number Sir?" She politely asks and I look like I am going to cry, I swear I take back the words I said yesterday! I hate him now!!
"1025" with a thankyou he cuts the call and when he sees me glaring at him with real hatred, he raises his eyebrow.
Without arguing I throw the sheets away and I press my lips together to not cry because I don't know why but I feel emotional as heck today!! I hate myself for that!
Before I could leave this room and this guy alone he holds my wrist and pulls me down, before spreading his legs and making me sit between them. After a short pause he speaks.
"Is someone upset?" That soft genuine voice when reached my ears my eyes reacted, my eyes sting with tears at his audacity but I do not open my mouth. When he notices my eyes glistening, a soft chuckle leaves his lips and he pulls me against his chest "Burger and pizza's in the morning are unhealthy" he talks like a doctor which is only annoying me.
"Don't you want us to enjoy this trip by going around many places? But if you eat such unhealthy food empty stomach, you're gonna only sleep in this bed with an upset stomach and upset mind, you don't want that right? That's why I did not order those, so stop sulking now" I quickly wipe my tears but fiddle with my fingers. He always cares about me and I am so dumb to even understand that, I hate myself. I quietly sniff, confuse on myself for being so emotional all of a sudden.
Is this what I think it is? Is that the reason why I am feeling emotional and that I get sudden moodswings? It can't be...I don't think Ayaan is ready for this...ya Allah.
After a long pause I open my mouth.
"I think I am pregnant" I truthfully tell him, without hiding anything but he reacts by coughing loudly. Not only choking on his words but his saliva too.
Ayaan ايان
When I hear her upright innocent sentence, I choke on my saliva losing my hold on her I rub my chest and she quickly turns to rub my back.
"W-what did you say?" I lick my dry lips asking her again just to clarify if what I heard was right.
She takes a deep breath and sits down normally after assuring that I was not dying, her eyes again glistening with tears as she places her hand on her stomach.
Ya allah what is wrong with this women!! If this innocence continues I am sure I am going in a coffin to Jeddah.
"I-I think I am pregnant"she even stutters now! Freaking hell! I take a deep breath to calm myself from this sudden attack "From the past few days I get sudden mood swings and I crave to eat many things and now see you have a live example, you said nothing but I feel like crying rivers and valleys because you changed the order without asking me, I am telling you I am pregnant, I have goggled it and they said pregnant women get frequent mood swings and they crave for lot of weird things" she sniffs and wipes her tears explaining it to me clearly.
I so want to say her to go google how you become pregnant instead of what happens when you are pregnant but I stop myself from saying so knowing that she will nod and do that the next second and I don't want to make things more awkward now.
But the question is, yesterday when I was saying her we will take it slow abd we wouldn't be doing anything intimate just because we are alone what did she understand by that sentence? Did she really thought I was talking about kisses and hugs? I guess yes, because all the time I try to flirt with her with some indirect words she nods it right away telling me she feels this same or asks me to elaborate since she did not get what I said.
"You are not pregnant sweetheart, it's just some side effects of jet lag I guess" I pull her closer but she only cries more panicking me "I knew you are not going to believe me! Are you abandoning our child like those people do in those daily soaps drama's?" Where the hell is this going?! She looks at me with wide eyes as if I broke her heart just now.
What shit is this now?
I gulp but shake my head "love, you are not pregnant because I know that you are not. It's just this is a new place so you are getting emotional" I cup her cheek gently wiping her tears away.
"Are you sure?" I quickly nod pressing my lips on her cheek "I am sure sweetheart" my heart thumping against my chest just at the thought of one day this being real and she telling me the same sentence and how my reaction would be.
She leans back resting her head on my shoulder and she stays quiet, knowing that she in deep thoughts I intertwine our hands gently pulling it up to kiss her knuckles.
"What are you thinking sweetheart?" She nervously bites her lips and shakes her head telling me directly that many things are going inside her head but she is not feeling comfortable to ask out loud.
"You know you can ask me anything right?" I gently kiss her shoulder to assure her with some simple touches.
"I know..." she again trails off with a low voice and I can tell that she is still doubting on whether is pregnant or not...Sweetheart I barely have taken a piece of cloth off you...I am so sorry to say but you are not pregnant love--I wish I could say this out loud.
"If I ask you something, can you promise me that you will not make fun of me and will reply truthfully" I can see the future...I can tell I am going to go more brighter shade in red with the next question she is going to ask.
"I promise, ask me anything" please don't! I lick my dry lips waiting for her awkward difficult question to reach my ears.
"Umm ammi said if..um if you touch me—nothing leave that" she hides her face in my chest all of a sudden becoming shy and blushing so hard and I sit there confused not able to understand what she was saying.
"Kinza Can you please tell me clearly" she like a stubborn girl after building the curiosity inside me shakes her head.
"What if I am pregnant will you abandon this child" she looks down at her stomach eyeing it with worry "kinza the first thing I want to say is stop watching those cringe unrealistic drama's—that is spoiling your brain badly" she looks at me with wide eyes as if she is caught.
"How umm how do you know?" She makes it obvious and looks at me with those innocent eyes asking me how the hell I knew about something she never said me.
When I roll my eyes feeling annoyed at her assumptions of being pregnant she looks down in guilt "I am scared you will turn out to be like Hamza and I will end up like Zaynab" she speaks in a low voice almost tearing up.
Now who the hell is this hamza?! And who is Zaynab now?!
"Hamza?" She nods but sniffs and wipes her eyes so she do not cry "yes...he left Zayanab after she was pregnant, I don't want to end up like that. They also kissed and the next day she was pregnant I know it is a drama and it is not real but in every movie after they kiss they become you know preggy...and we also kissed so many time and after I saw the symptoms of a pregnant women I thought I am..." she nibbles on her lower lips and I only look at her with unbelievable look on my face. Is she serious? I am sure she is kidding...she can not be so innocent...This can't be real.
I let out a cough not knowing how to explain or what to say feeling so much under pressure.
"Kinza" I gulp my saliva when she snaps her head up and looks at me with those doe eyes which are glistening with tears.
"It's—" this is difficult as hell! I am not going to explain science Now!! What the hell was she doing when her teacher was teaching her about human reproduction.
"You are not pregnant okay? And even if you are don't worry I would never leave you, trust me sweetheart" she quickly wraps her arms around my neck and hugs me tightly telling me through the hug that this is what she wanted to hear.
"I love you" she mumbles and hugs me tighter "but I am still upset with you for ignoring my order and I want you buy me burger and pizza in the noon" I give her my words on not stopping her from eating anything she wants and she happily grins.
"I was getting emotional all of a sudden alot and I also look chubby now...look at me face" she pinches her cute chubby cheeks which looks no different to me.
"I don't see anything so stop overthinking" she hums finally understanding and letting the matter slide.
But a gasp leaves her lips and Her eyes lits up when the door bell rings and she jumps out of the bed and rushes out even though I know she will not open the door cause she is not in a good state of welcoming anyone, so I follow her.
But my mind still is in a state of shock with what happen...how can she be so innocent, that is why they say we should not skip chapters when learning and I remember teachers clearly asking us to skip the chapter because it is not important.
Hell it is important! Very very important....
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