Brett stared at Eddy. Eddy gazed back at him.
"So Brett.. if I promise I'll do my best not to upset you, will you see me again?"
Brett's eyes widened in surprise.
------------------------------
Brett stammered;
"What? Me? What? And..you? What? ...Us?!"
Eddy let out a chuckle.
"Yeah."
"Why?"
"..What do you mean why? Why not?"
"..Because I have absolutely no idea why you would ever want to."
Eddy smiled.
"Oh, I have my reasons. I've always had a bit of a crush on you."
"You did!? ..Are you crazy?"
"Excuse me?"
"What the hell would you see in me? Just look at me."
As he muttered in an exasperated tone, Brett opened up his hands, showing his gloved palms.
"What.. what kind of person could... genuinely be ...interested in someone ...all latexed up like me..."
Eddy smiled.
"Brett, you're not all latexed up.. so you wear gloves. The gloves are only a very small part of you."
Brett gazed at Eddy, still looking uncertain about everything.
"You.. have a crush on me?"
"Yeah"
"So.. what doe s that mean?"
"Well.. I wish you were my boyfriend"
"What.. like a girlfriend, boyfriend type boyfriend?"
"Um.. yeah. Except there're no girls involved so it would be like a boyfriend, boyfriend type boyfriend."
"..What the f*ck?"
Eddy let out a chuckle;
"Well I don't wanna rush things, so I'd like to first get to know you more. Become good friends. And perhaps when the time is right.. become intimate with you.."
"....what...?"
"..No?"
"I... I can't get my head around that."
Brett bit his lower lip and became very quiet. It appeared as if he could no longer utter a single word.
"Brett.. maybe we should get going?"
"Yeah.. please let me get this bill since I asked you out."
Eddy decided not to argue with him over the bill and cause him more stress.
"Okay. Thank you, Brett. Well, can I get us some coffees after this then?"
"Um, sure, I'd like that.."
They both approached the till, Eddy waited nearby while Brett paid for the food.
"Thank you for dinner Brett."
"You're welcome."
They left the small eatery. Once outside, Eddy stammered;
"Brett.. about before.. It's.. it's fair enough. It's still early stages. I get it that any intimacy is still a bit far off into the future"
Brett shook his head;
"A bit..? Eddy.. I.. I can't even shake hands with you."
"You could with those gloves on, couldn't you?"
"I.. I don't know. I've never tried. Most people see the gloves and are too weirded out to try and I've been perfectly happy with that.."
"Brett."
Brett looked up. Eddy stood holding out his right hand, offering a handshake.
Brett stared at Eddy's hand. He then raised his right hand towards Eddy's, then froze. This time Brett started to stare at his own hand. He stared and stared and stared at it. His hand started to shake.
"Brett.. can I reach out and take your hand?"
Brett shook his head.
"N, no.. !! Please, don't..!!"
It was as if Brett was paralysed with fear that he could not even retract his own hand.
"Okay, okay, Brett it's alright, I'm not gonna grab it, I promise, okay? What can I do to help you Brett?"
"I.. I think we're too close to each other and you're making me nervous.. can you move back away from me, please?"
"Yeah. Of course."
Eddy retracted his hand and took a few steps back, increasing the distance between them, giving Brett some extra space. Brett let out a sigh of relief and was able to retract his own hand, then let it fall by the side of his body. He clenched it into a fist and grimaced.
"Eddy.. I.. I'm so sorry..."
"Don't be Brett, please."
"Brett..?"
Brett looked up.
"Monica..."
Eddy turned to the side and saw a very young and attractive girl approaching them.
"Hi Brett! I thought I'd finally try out your recommendation."
She then turned to Eddy.
"Hi.. I'm Monica Wu. I went to school with Brett."
"School?"
"Yes. He was a couple of years senior of me."
..He wasn't even in her year and she knows him? He knows her?
"Oh. Hi, I'm Eddy. I'm in some of the same uni classes as Brett."
Eddy held out his hand for a handshake. Monica looked up at Eddy, shifted her gaze to Brett, then back at Eddy and gave a shy smile. Eddy momentarily furrowed his eyebrows but assumed she was just very shy and retracted his hand. Monica looked relieved and smiled again,.
"Oh so Eddy, you're a journalism major too?"
..She knows what Brett majors in?
Eddy looked at Brett wishing he would introduce her. Brett raised his eyes and looked at Eddy.
"Um.. Eddy.. this is Monica.. She's in her first year at our uni now. We... we went to the same high school. Monica, this is Eddy. Yeah I think he's a journo major like me, aren't you?"
"..Yeah. So.. you guys knew each other since high school?"
"Um.. No I didn't but Monica told me that she did.."
"Yes, I knew of him since high school Eddy."
"Oh. Um.. Okay. Fair enough"
"Nice to meet you Eddy."
"Likewise Monica."
Eddy didn't understand why Brett looked riddled with guilt.
"Well.. um.. I better get going.."
Brett looked up.
"..Eddy? I thought we were gonna go get some coffee.."
"Sorry Brett.. I.. I just remembered something.. I'll see you at Uni, okay?"
And Eddy walked away, leaving Brett with Monica. He didn't want to, but he couldn't work out the tangled and heavy feelings he harboured in his chest and it was getting so painful, he just had to get away. Unfortunately, the pain in his chest seemed to have worsened with every step he took away from them, knowing that the further he walked away from them, the relative distance between Brett and that girl, Monica, would become shortened. What Eddy really wanted to do was rush back and step in between those two. After harbouring a crush towards Brett for months, Eddy had finally felt a bit closer to Brett, getting to know him better, understanding him better and then suddenly he felt as if he was pushed so far away from him again.
Eddy thought back about the conversation he had with Brett about wanting Brett to be his boyfriend.
"What.. like a girlfriend, boyfriend type boyfriend?"
"Um.. yeah. Except there're no girls involved so it would be like a boyfriend, boyfriend type boyfriend."
..So much for no girls involved...!!
Eddy's heart ached.
Monica and Brett watched Eddy walk away. Once she knew Eddy was no longer within an earshot, Monica asked Brett;
"Brett..? You.. haven't told Eddy about.. us?"
"No. I promised you that I would not tell anybody."
"Brett.. I respect you for keeping your word but he's special. He deserves to know. "
"...How did you know he was special?"
"Brett.. it's very obvious from the way he looks at you. And not as obvious but obvious enough when I see how bothered you looked when Eddy looked confused and hurt."
"It was!? ..But you and I.. we promised each other that we wouldn't tell anybody."
"..I think these circumstances call for bending the rules."
"Monica.. I.. I could never work out when and where the rules bend."
Monica looked up at Brett and smiled.
"I gathered that. But it was starting to feel difficult to keep your promise, wasn't it? Well, maybe not difficult... but painful?"
Brett nodded.
"..Very."
"Well, that's when you should consider bending the rules.. I know we didn't have time to discuss it.. but it's not too late. So, telling me that something is starting to hurt and asking for an alternative is not the same as breaking a promise, okay?"
"Okay.. thank you for telling me this. So.. are you saying that it is okay for me to tell Eddy about us?"
"Yes. He is obviously someone special to you and I think you should go tell him so that he doesn't feel sad."
"Okay. Thanks, Monica."
And with that, Brett sprinted off after Eddy.