{Haneul's POV}
"Okay, Haneul. Relax. Inhale, exhale," I shut my eyes and breathe heavily. I wiped my tears and calmed down for a minute.
"Everything's going to be fine. If he really doesn't like you, then be it!! You'll regret it Jeon Jungkook!" I smiled to the fact I gained my strong personality again.
I was a brave and strong girl since dad left us. Mom wasn't that good in holding her tears and easily giving up. So, I need to be strong at least for her. She was always depending on me.
But after meeting Jungkook, I became very confident being with him. I felt that I was protected for some reason.
But now, I'll be walking on my own. Again!
No one can destroy me! That's the spirit, Haneul! Fighting!
I quickly went downstairs and looked for mom. She was at the backyard, watering her lovely garden.
"Boo!" I surprised her that made her jump from her position.
"Oh! This kid.. What are you up to??" she rolled her eyes away as I giggled from the fact mom sounds a fifty-year old ahjumma (old lady).
"Nothing.. I'm hungry!" I hugged her tight as she smiled.
"Hmm.. You better tell me a story when dinner is served, okay?" she said that made me frown.
Tsk. Omma, why do you need to ask me that favor? Do you want me to tear up again? Nope. I won't cry!
After an hour, mom called me to eat. I ran towards the dining and helped her prepare the table. Sigh, I suddenly miss my girls. They often eat dinner with us.
The two of us sat and prayed. After that, we enjoyed the dinner! Ahh, omma's the best cook in the whole wide world!
"Omma, I want some seaweed soup next time!" I chuckled as she sighed and smiled.
Seawood soup was oftenly cooked by dad. When he's still with us. I liked it a lot, until now. Even though I should be hating it because the one who made such memories with this dish left me crying.
Like Jungkook, I should be hating him right now. Cursing him, swearing at him, and anything that can take as a revenge. But instead, I'm still finding a way to be with him again.
"Fine, everything you want to eat," she answered and let out a half smile. I know she have remembered dad after hearing it.
Mom then looked at me with an indescribable glaze. It was like she was doubting. And for some reason, I got nervous.
"Tell me, did Jungkook hurt you?" she said that made me gulp the food inside my mouth that I haven't chewed that much.
"Hm? N-no! Why would he?" I avoided her looks and continued eating. Yes, why would he? But he did it.
"But why do I sense something wrong?" she added.
"Huh? No omma, there's nothing wrong. And if you're going to ask me why I was crying a while ago, that's because of.." I paused for a while to think of something to reason out.
"Because of Jungkook. Stop denying, I know you because you're my daughter," she worriedly said and held my hand.
I drank my glass of water and calmed myself, "Well, yes. But it was just some misunderstandings. You know, sometimes, friends do fight, mom"
She laughed and looked at me, "Seriously? Friends? Aren't you dating already? Hahaha,"
"A-aniya!! (N-no!!) S-seolma! (Not a chance!) We're just friends. And if he tried to make me cry again, I'm going to end our friendship!" I explained but mom gave me again a laugh.
"Friendship or.. Relationship?? Hmm?"
"What? Omma! Just, I'm serious!"
"I'm serious too!! He even asked me if he can take you out if you have a freetime.. Tsk," she mumbled that made my eyes bigger.
"Wait, what?"
She looked at me and smiled, "Aigoo, he oftenly visits me whenever you're out with Jaemin and Ae sook. He asked me couple of questions about you. What do you like? What is your ideal type? What is your favorite food? He even asked me if he can call me mom. Actually, I can trust you to him. He's very reliable, and if you ever fight, I know it will be solved right away," she took a sip from her glass and smiled.
I was so surprised on what mom told me. It was unbelievable. See? I know he loves me!
"Yeah.. I hope so. I hope it will be solved as fast as it can," I sighed and finished my meal.
After eating, I went back to my room amd took a bath. I prepared the tub and brought my phone inside. This is the best time to have real talks with my girls!
As soon as I went inside the tub, I quickly dialled my girls.
I waited for about three seconds but, I decided to call Jungkook instead. Maybe this time, he's in a good mood.
The ringing sound of the phone made me more nervous.
"Yeoboseyo? (Hello?)" he answered. I quickly sat straight.
"Yo Jungkookie, wassup??" I tried to sound cool but deep inside, butterflies flew not only in my tummy, but all over my body.
"What the hell? I don't have time to talk with a sasaeng," (sasaeng is an obsessed fangirl) he answered.
"But I have lots of time to talk to the man who keeps on pretending he doesn't know my existence."
A moment of silence until I heard a sobbing sound.
"Are you crying??" I asked worriedly.
"N-no,"
"But I heard someone crying! Don't tell me there are ghosts in your house,"
"Stop it!!!"
A moment of silence again until..
"I'm a-all alone here,"
I smiled to the fact he stopped me not from talking to him, instead, from teasing him. This is Jungkook!
"Hahaha, c'mon! The bad ass Jungkook is scared of ghosts?"
"Stop it! Lee Haneul, I'm serious!!"
"Fine.. Jungkook-ah," I said as I splashed the water using my foot.
"Yeah?"
"I.."
"Hmm?"
I gulped and relaxed for a while.
"I'm sorry to whatever I did to you, if ever I hurt you without me, noticing it. I just want you to know that, I.. I love you. And if even if you won't change your mind from hating me, please. Be happy and smile all the time. And don't avoid me, nor skip classes. And be with Bangtan or with my girls. It's fine. I wasn't asking you to talk to me, I just don't want you running away when seeing me. I hope we'll beー"
*toot toot*
HE HUNG UP. IS THAT HOW YOU TALK WITH A PERSON WHO IS TRYING TO MAKE UP WITH YOU? AISH!
I'm seriously mad right now.
I went out from the tub and quickly dried myself. I wore my pajamas and jumped into my bed.
"Hmph! If he don't want to make up, then, be it! Can't he see I'm trying to be nice?" I clutched my pillow into my chest and reached my phone from the table.
I'm just holding my temper, Jeon Jungkook! I'll kill you! I'm trying to be nice and you're being too harsh!
I pressed the send button and went to sleep.
•Morning•
*kring kring*
My alarm clock woke me up at five in the morning. By that time, I'm still thinking if I'm going to school or just take a rest for a while. I'm pretty ready for our game in PE class but, I don't know. There's a part of me that kept on telling me not to go.
While thinking all the advantages and disadvantages of each decision, I did my morning rituals; starting from brushing my teeth and taking a bath. After that, I went towards my closet to pick up my uniforms (school amd p.e uniform).
I ended up wearing my uniform so, I'll be going to school. And I know what mom will be asking me later.
I went downstairs to have breakfast. And it was really a big breakfast for me!
Sweet toasted bread, fried eggs, bacon, and of course, fresh milk! Ah~ What a good day to start!
"Omma!! It looks yummy!" I whispered as my eyes started to stare at the dishes and my mouth started to drool.
"Whoops, did I did it too much?" mom smiled while placing the plates.
I quickly drag a chair and started eating. Mom looked at me, obviously satisfied.
"I thought you're not going to school today?" I knew she would ask that!
"I changed my mind, uh.. I miss my friends at school, and my uh, teachers!" I answered and it actually sound very pathetic.
"You mean, you miss Jungkook? Aigoo.. Why do you keep on denying it? You should tell the truth, honey. The truth will set you free!"
I spit the water I was drinking and laughed really hard.
"Woah mom, you sound like Father Jikyung! Hahaha," I laughed that my eyes went teary.
Mom sighed and looked at me with a serious face.
"Look at you, pretending that you're happy doesn't make sense. What did I told you before? If it causes you so much pain, it's very okay to cry." mom said worriedly.
I looked down as her words struck my heart, although I actually laughed at her a while ago, mom do knows best. That's why I'm thankful that I have her and she never left me, unlike dad.
I went to school about 6:30 AM. I arrived a bit earlier than expected, the skies were still dark and the sun wasn't that showy. The campus was eerily quiet and a few people were here. Some of them were students but most was campus staffs. Ah, but it's okay. I love staying on a place where there is few people.
I went upstairs and I can hear my own footsteps. I suddenly remembered that it was already the end of the school year. Seniors would be graduating after three months and us; juniors, would be the next seniors of this campus.
From what I know, the seniors, especially the scholars would be taking up their entrace examsfor college next month. They would be totally busy.
Sigh, I wonder what University will Bangtan be entering on their college. Will they still be a group?
I went inside our classroom and waited for about how many minutes until my classmates enter the room, one by one. My girls enetered the class together and as soon as they saw me, they gave me a warm hug. Aww~
"Gaah~ Haneul! Why haven't you entered the last four classes yesterday? Where have you been? We're totally worried about you," Jaemin said as she sat beside me.
Ae sook dragged a chair and sat, "Hmm, I smell something fishy," she gave me a doubting look as I started to lie again.
"I was weak to enter the class yesterday, so I called mom and went home. Sorry for making the two of you worry," I replied that made them sighed.
"It's good that you're okay now," Ae sook said as Mr. Seo entered the class.
English class started yet I don't have my book on my bag. It was probably at my lockers so, I quickly apologized and asked permission and rushed to the lockers.
While opening my locker, I heard loud thumps of footsteps coming from the staircase. So, I quickly picked up my book in English and Science.
As I turned back, I saw Bangtan walking towards me.
"Ooh! Annyeong Haneul! (Hello Haneul!)" Yoongi greeted as the rest smiled. Except him, again.
I bowed and walked away until,
"Wait! Haneul!" Taehyung shouted from the hallway.
I slowly looked back and walked towards them.
"Are you and Jungkook not in good terms?" he asked that made the other members agree.
I shook my head and look away, "No, we're not fighting. I know that you guys were kind of busy right now so I don't want to bother you. And besides, I'm still having my class. Sorry,"
I bowed for the last time but then, I saw Jungkook getting out of the scene.
"Ya! Jungkook! That's rude!" Jimin shouted as he tried to chase him.
Namjoon looked at me then patted Hoseok and Seokjin's shoulders. He followed Jungkook together with Taehyung and Yoongi.
The two members sighed and asked me.
"Tell us the truth. I know the two of you are having a rough time, we want to help," Seokjin said in the most gentle way he can deliver that statement.
My eyes started to look at them with sincerity.
"It's okay, tell us." Hoseok said and gave me a friendly hug.
"I-I don't even know w-what's the reason why we're having this kind of situation." I sobbed really hard as the two of them tried to comfort me.
They tried to calm me down and then, they guided me until I got back to class.
{Jungkook's POV}
Damn! Why am I always having a time to see her? How can I let her know that we should just end up what's between us in a way she wouldn't get hurt? How can I tell my hyungs to help me in my situation without making them worried about my sickness? How can I end this rough life I'm having without dying and leaving the people whom I loved so much?
She was there by the lockers, and I saw her getting her books. I remembered the first time we had our argument and it was about her jealousy towards Sooyeon. Back then, she was just a random girl to me that I kissed on the forehead. She got angry because of the fact that, that kiss has no meanings for me.
But now, she's no random girl to me. She's my life.
I gave myself a quick look at her back figure, I suddenly felt that tingling feeling from my spine that went fast towards my heart. She was like one of the doctor's tool that makes the patient alive. She was my oxygen that gives me hope to live and fight when I'm nearly dying.
Bangtan greeted her so I quickly look away. Aish, I'm so done with myself! I look so obvious!! ㅠㅅㅠ
The atmosphere was really okay and she was about to go back to her class. But then, this alien hyung called her again!!
He asked her if we're having a rough time and surprisingly, she lied.
You know what? She successfully made my heart break into million pieces with her answer. She lied because she knows that I'll be the one who will look bad if she will tell the truth. She knows that I hate dramas. She did it for my sake and it made me to felt so much guiltness in my soul.
Making the girl I love sacrifice her rights to speak.. Aish..How horrible am I?
I walked away that made my hyungs think of it as a rude action. But, this is the right thing to do. This is what I should do.
Jimin hurriedly went after me together with Namjoon, Yoongi, and Taehyung.
When I got a little bit far to Haneul, he slammed me towards the wall while his teeth clenching with anger and his fistsーready to smash my face.
"What the f*ck are you doing? Huh? What the f*ck?! Haneul kept on protecting you but you kept on pushing her away! Why the f*ck do you have to do these sh*ts?!" he shouted but I decided to look away.
Yoongi and Taehyung tried to stop him until Namjoon spoke,
"Let's talk." he commanded and I have no choice but to follow him.
The two hyungs held Jimin as he gave me dangerous glares while following Namjoon.
"What is the problem?" he asked.
We weren't that far towards Jimin and the other members so I had a hard time deciding if I should tell them what was my situation.
"Answer him! You jerk!" Jimin shouted as he tried to escape from the hyungs.
Seokjin and Hoseok then followed and helped the two other hyungs.
I think this is the time to tell it.
I shut my eyes and inhaled.
"I have leukemia. And it was already in stage 2. The doctor told me that the spreading time of my sickness were a bit faster than others. I need to get therapied in five years but there is no exact answer if it can be cured," I explained that made the hyungs shocked.
"What..?" Jimin asked with a low voice and about to burst in tears.
"He is telling the truth, my aunt told me about it. I decided to keep it as a secret and let him tell it first, I'm sorry," Seokjin said that made me surprised.
I looked down and held back my tears.
"I decided to keep it since I know you will get worried. And I hide this also to Haneul. I know she will be a lot sadder than me. She might get depressed to the point she might forgot how to live. I'm scared to be the reason of her getting down from loving me. So I decided to push her away. At least, she will just cry because I died, not because from loving me."
"H-how could you.." Jimin said that made the other members cry.
"You should live! Don't die! Please, she'll get more upset if youー"
"We don't know what will happen to me! There is only 30% chance for me to live! I don't know how can I.. Just please, help me.. Bangtan. Help me as your friend and brother. Let her find another man that won't leave her no matter what. Let her live her life happily. Please.." I slowly sat on the floor and sobbed.
The hyungs sat beside me and Namjoon hyung patted my shoulder, "You are such a brave boy.. I salute you, man! But Jungkook, are you sure about this decision?"
I looled at him, having tears all over my face.
"I am.. Just for her to he happy,"
{Haneul's POV}
It was already lunch time and I'm happily taking my lunch with my girls at the campus field. We talked about our excitement about being a senior next school year.
"I can't wait!" I exclaimed and the girls smiled.
"But, Bangtan will be in college next year. Otteokhe? (What to do?)" Jamein said with a cute voice.
Ae sook's expression became gloomy, "You're right,"
"Eyyy, that's okay. I'm sure they'll visit you here," I cheered them up but it made me upset.
"How I wish Jungkook would also visit me," I sighed as both of them elbowed me.
"Why? What's the problem?" Jaemin asked.
"Hmm.. I don't know but, maybe he's tired being with me. I guess I can't do anything about that," I replied.
"You sound calm but it was obvious that you're in pain," Ae sook rolled her eyes and lied on the green grass on the soccer field.
Jaemin and I joined her.
"You're right.." I whispered.
•dismissal•
The bell rung and all the students rushed through the school's gate. But why am I feeling this weird feeling?
Before, I get so excited to go home.
But now, I feel like I want to spend more time here in school.
The three of us stayed at the garden for a while and fortunately, we saw Sooyeon.
"Hi Sooyeon!" the three of us greeted in chorus.
"Hello!" She answered with a smile. "Oh my gosh, Haneul! Why do you look so.. pale?"
I touched my face with my cold hands, "Am I?"
My girls looked at me really confused, "Hmm, I haven't noticed that but, she's right. You look sick!" Ae soom stated.
"Here, I always have this juice with me. It boosts energy" she handed me the juice she got from her bag and gave me a refreshing smile.
Ah, no wonder why Taehyung fell in love with her!
"What are you doing here, Sooyeon?" Jaemin asked as her eyes roamed around at the colorful flowers.
"This is where I go whenever I get upset," she answered.
"Upset? Why? What happened?" I asked worriedly.
"Uhm, nothing really big. But I'm just.. Sigh. Taehyung oppa will be in college next school year. I'm going to miss him." she said while pouting her lips.
"Yeah, same here!" my girls said in chorus as we all giggled.
"Aigoo, don't worry about that. The two of you looked very strong. No storm can destroy the your relationship," I smiled and patted her shoulder.
"Thanks Haneul, I hope the HaKook couple is okay," she said and after that, she bowed and told us goodbye.
We haven't stayed too long at the garden and went home after fifteen minutes.
I went home and mom was already at her room. She said she was tired so, she can't cook. Well, I'm not that hungry so I went straight to my room and lied on my bed.
I stretched my arms and looked up in the ceiling.
"Ahh.. Jungkook! Let's be friends again! Waaah! I miss you so much!" I shouted that made me feel lighter.
"Haneul.." someone spoke that shocked me a lot.
I quickly flopped out of my bed and saw Jimin.
Wait. Don't tell me I'm dreaming again.
I pinched amd slapped myself but I ended up hurting myself.
"What the hell are you doing?" he asked laughing.
"Am i dreaming??"
"No, you're not. I went here earlier and waited for you but, I guess you haven't notuved me waiting by the living area." he explained as i stood up straight.
"Oh.. Sorry.. But why are you here?" I asked.
"I have something to tell you."
His expression turned dark and can't look at me in the eye.
"Get away from Jungkook."
"Wait. What?? Why?"
"Just.. get away from him. Find another man. You don't deserve him!"
"Are you trying to be my boyfriend?"
"Yes! I mean, NO! I'm serious Haneul, get away from him. I'm telling you this as a friend. Jungkook said he doesn't like you, he likes another girl from uhmm.. I dont know! But please, marry Hyungki!"
I don't exactly what he said and what is his point but I'm seriously laughing right now.
"Jimin oppa, can you please clam down and explain it in details,"
He sighed but I kept on laughing.
"Haneul, this is not a funny issue. please stop laughing. Marry Hyungki, that's all."
"Why am I going to do that?"
"Because.. Because Jungkook is.."
"Jungkook is what?"
"Jungkook likes someone already and they're engaged,"
There are no words that can describe what I am feeling right now. What joke is this again?
"Okay. That's a funny joke. Get out." I said as I pushed him away.
"But Haneulー"
I closed and locked the door.
"Sorry for bothering you, Haneul. I'll go now," he said from the door as I heard his footsteps going downstairs.
I sighed and sighed and sighed.
What is happening to me? To us? This is not what I'm expecting..
Now, he is engaged to someone I don't know. And Jimin oppa even told me to get married to Hyungki. Wow. What a happy life.
Seriously, I'm going to call him.
{Jungkook's POV}
*nouie nun, ko, ip nan manjidul ni son-gil jageun sontop kajidaaa~*
I picked up my phone and of course, it was her again.
"What?"
"What? Huh! Now you're getting engaged! You even asked Jimin to tell me that joke! If you dont love me, then tell me straight in the heart. Let me feel that I have no space in your heart! Stop making stories!" she shouted that made me really confused.
Aish! Park Jimin! I'm going to kill you!! Why out of all things, why is it has to be engagement?
"You know what? I don't give a f*ck! Stop calling me. Let's just end this. I don't want to see you again!" she said that made me gulp my life.
"Haneul! Listenー" I heard the annoyinh beeping sound. She hug up.
"... I love you, " I whispered to the phone, hoping she can still hear what I'm saying.
That's it. She left me.
But that's better.
It's okay that I am the one getting hurt instead of her.
I'm sorry Haneul. This is the only way to make you walk in happiness in the future.
♡♡♡♡
Hello!
Sorry if there were lots of typos and wrong grammars. And sorry if this is a boring update. I tried to make it long but I'm sick ㅠㅅㅠ
I'm sorry for making you wait that long, I can't stay that long in front of my laptop and phone. My eyes gets easily hurt..
But I hope you like it tho ^^
'till next update!
xoxo,
Starish10 ㅇㅅㅇ