Chapter 4
"Oh. Are you... going somewhere?" Dream asked, walking into the living room and seeing Sapnap and Karl, with shoes on and car keys in Sapnap's hand.
"Yes." Sapnap said. And for some reason, the way he suspiciously said it made Dream know instantly what it was.
He didn't respond, instead tensing his jaw and walking past them, into the next room. Sapnap looked at Karl, who sighed, and they both followed Dream.
They'd been fighting for days. The same argument every time it tried to be brought up civilly. Every time it hurt more and more.
"Dream-"
"Stop." Dream responded, opening the fridge and looking inside.
"It's her birthday." Karl said. Dream let the cold air pass across his face, and didn't turn around. "You can't be mad at us for going-"
"You think that's what I'm mad at?" Dream muttered.
"At us seeing George again and meeting his daughter? Yes, I think that's what you're mad at." Sapnap said. Dream's fist clenched around the door handle, eyes raking over the food even though he didn't know what he was looking for.
"Look, Dream, we love you. But George is our fr-"
"I know he's your fucking friend. Good for you." Dream yelled, slamming the fridge door shut and spinning around. He stared at the two of them. Karl took a step back but Sapnap stood taller.
"I know that what happened between both of yo-"
"Stop." Dream seethed, staring daggers at Sapnap. "Stop. Just. Stop, please." He said, and then walked past them both. "I'm tired of this."
Sapnap didn't stop, he followed Dream.
"You can't be mad at us for being friends with him."
"Yes I can!" Dream snapped, turning back around. "He hurt me. He broke my heart. You saw what he did to me four years ago. You saw how much it hurt. He hurt you too! He blocked all of us. And then suddenly he comes back and you just forgive him? Just like that? I'm sorry, but I just don't understand." Dream said. Sapnap nodded, but had his arms crossed against his chest.
"I know it's different for you. You don't have to see him ever. I get it. But me and Sapnap still-" Karl tried to speak calmly.
"It feels like you're choosing sides." Dream said, his voice breaking. "Just because he has a kid now, you, what? Feel bad for him? You're choosing him over me now? Even after he ignored you for years." Dream said.
"That's not what this is, Dream." Karl said. "There aren't sides."
"But there is! There is in every breakup. In everything." Dream said.
"Well if there is, then why is it fair I've chosen your side, hm? I've been with you throughout the whole thing. I know your side of the story. Don't you think it's unfair that I never heard George's? No one has been on his side." Sapnap argued back.
"There aren't sides." Karl said softly, but it went unheard by the other two.
"Because everything was his fault! He did it to himself. He broke my heart." Dream yelled at Sapnap.
"You don't understand the position he was in! If you heard his side-"
"I'd what? I'd understand why he left me? Why he chose an unborn child over me? I proposed to him. That meant forever. I would love him unconditionally and forever but clearly he couldn't do the same for me." Dream said, and hated the way his eyes stung with anger and sadness.
He looked down at the floor, tensing his jaw to prevent any stupid tears.
"Would I understand why he didn't love me as much as I did him?" Dream added in a softer voice.
Sapnap was silent for a moment.
"He did love you. He loved you so much." Sapnap said, softer than his previous tone. It almost sounded like he was choking up too.
"Well clearly he didn't love me enough to stay." Dream said, and shoved past Sapnap and Karl, walking through the house and going back up the stairs.
Karl put a hand on Sapnap's shoulder, and made him look at him.
"Sap, there aren't sides at all. It's not who is right and who is wrong, or who hurt who the most, who made the biggest mistakes." Karl said. "There's just Dream's point of view and George's point of view."
"If Dream heard George's-"
"Do you think that would fix anything? Do you think it would make Dream feel better? Knowing his boyfriend at the time was going through so much turmoil and stress? And he was hiding it the whole time, not sharing it with the person you should tell everything to?" Karl said with furrowed eyebrows.
Sapnap was silent.
"What do you think it would fix?" Karl asked, crossing his arms over his chest. "Because if it were me, I think I'd be more hurt that you never shared how unhappy you were. I would be more hurt that you didn't trust me enough to tell me what was going on. I'm supposed to help you through everything." Karl said, voice breaking.
Sapnap pulled Karl into a hug, arms tight around his waist.
•
There were several kids running around everywhere in the apartment. All with party hats on and loose glitter on theirs faces and clothes.
Somehow, there was glitter on Karl and Sapnap too. And they hadn't even been here for that long.
George poured them both a glass of champagne, before chugging his own. Sapnap raised an eyebrow.
"I have a headache, ok? This party has been stressful." George said, about to pour himself another glass.
"Have mine. I'm driving anyway." Sapnap said, handing it back over.
"I thought you haven't been in Florida long? How does Lana know these kids?" Karl said. All the parents were milling around in the living room, so Sapnap and Karl felt very out of place.
"It's a group for single parents." George said, gesturing back through the kitchen to the living room. "It's just nice to hang out with people who understand, you know? And a lot of them are young, like me." He said, taking another mouthful of champagne. "I joined the group four years ago. I had moved away pretty soon after that, but I kept in contact with some of the parents, and some of them were still here when we came back."
"How many kids are there?" Karl chuckled as three ran through the kitchen, one holding a toy sword and chasing the other two.
"Seven." George grimaced. "Six parents, one of them has twins." Just as two identical boys tackled each other to the ground in the living room.
"Daddy." A girl interrupted their conversation, and George put down his glass of champagne to pick her up. Lana was wearing a pink dress and had rainbow clips in her hair.
"When can I open my presents?" She asked.
"Later. We can open them once everyone leaves." He said, bouncing her.
"What did Sapnat and Karl get me?" She giggled, looking at the pair.
"That's a surprise. It's the one in the orange and purple box." Karl teased. Lana looked at the table and grinned.
"What did Dream get me?" She then asked, looking back at them. George stopped bouncing her. He reached for the champagne with his other hand and finished it in one swig.
"I'm not sure. You remember he couldn't come today." Sapnap said softly. She frowned but nodded.
"Said he is very very busy." She mumbled, and then wriggled in her Dad's grip so he could put her down. He obliged.
"Sorry, Lana. I know he wishes he was here." Karl said, swallowing the guilt.
"It's okay. I have a surprise for him next time I see him!" She said.
"You do?" George furrowed his eyebrows. "What is it?"
"It's a surprise for Dream, not you Daddy." She laughed, and then turned to run off. George winced and poured himself another drink.
"Maybe slow down on the champagne, dude. You have children to keep an eye on." Sapnap said. George stopped pouring and nodded, placing the bottle back on the counter and holding his half-filled glass.
"Right." He said, taking a sip and moving back to the living room.
Some kid screamed while running through the kitchen, holding an empty cup over his head. Sapnap stared at him, before turning to look at his fiancé.
"I feel a little out of place." He said. Karl giggled.
"Me too." He said.
Lana quietly re-entered the room, looking around before running and grabbing Sapnap's leg.
"Hello birthday girl." Sapnap said. She looked up and put a finger to her lips.
Him and Karl crouched down to her level.
"You ok?" Karl asked. She shrugged, poking Sapnap's knee.
"I wish Dream was here." She said. Sapnap patted her on the back. "Everytime I say Dream, Daddy looks sad. So I think Daddy wants him to be here too! Can you ask him to come." Lana said.
Sapnap looked at Karl.
"Dream really wishes he was here, but he can't. I'm sorry, honey." He said. Lana swayed from side to side as she thought about what to say next.
"Can I say hi to him? Through the phone?" She asked. "I asked Daddy but he said no and then drinked some adult juice."
Sapnap narrowed his eyes.
"How much adult juice has he had today?"
"More adult juice than I drinked apple juice." She giggled. "But can I talk to Dream with the phone?"
"Um." Sapnap looked at Karl, who shrugged. "You know what. Sure." He said, sitting down entirely on the ground so he wouldn't get a leg cramp. Lana jumped up and down with a smile.
"Yay!" She cheered, and Karl sat down properly too. Sapnap pulled up Dream's contact, and hit dial, praying he answers without anger, or he doesn't answer at all.
It rang for several seconds.
"Look, Sapnap, I don't wanted hear an apology right now. Just give me time to cool off." Dream said, and Sapnap sighed in relief.
"Dream!" Lana said into the phone, but was met with radio silence for four entire seconds.
"Alana?" He said, confused, but then seemed to snap out of it. "Hi! Happy birthday!" He said. She giggled and danced around the phone.
"Thank you Dream! I am now, this many." She said, holding up her fingers.
"Four." Sapnap told her.
"Four!" She repeated. Dream chuckled.
"You are so grown up." He said, and Sapnap could hear the twinge of sadness in his tone.
"I know!" She giggled. "Are you still very busy?" She asked.
"Um. Yeah. I'm sorry I couldn't come." He said.
"It's okay. I have a surprise for you next time I see you!" She said.
"Really?" Dream said nervously.
"Yes! I've been practising because I want it to be perfect." She said.
"I don't know if I'll get to see you anytime soon though." Dream said, the guilt evident in his tone.
"Yes you will. I keep getting lost and finding you again. I'll just run away and you'll find me." She said with a shrug.
"No, Alana. You can't do any more running away. It's dangerous. Someone else could find you before I do and they might not be as nice." Dream said quickly.
"Oh. But then when will I see you?" She said quietly, her sadness obvious. Sapnap looked at Karl who also looked sad.
"I- I don't know."
"You can't even come to my party." She said, and sniffled.
"I'm sorry."
"It's okay. Daddy said I should stop talking to you if you don't want to see me." She said.
All three adults were silent.
"Your daddy told you not to talk to me?" Dream asked slowly.
"Only if you don't want me to. Like if you say you want to go home, like in the car the other day, I stop... stop... b-bothing you."
"Bothering?" Dream said softly through the line.
"Yes."
"You don't bother me." Dream said immediately.
"Daddy said you might be u-un-comfotle."
"Uncomfortable?" Sapnap whispered.
"Yes, that word."
Dream was silent. And so were Sapnap and Karl.
"Where's the birthday girl?" A woman asked from the living room. Sapnap looked up and saw a lot of kids all sitting in a circle in the living room.
"Lana, look, they are playing a game." Sapnap said. She turned around and lit up.
"Bye bye Dream!" She said.
"Bye, Alana." He said, before she ran over into the other room.
Sapnap and Karl stayed sitting on the ground for a moment longer, the call still active.
"Damn it." They heard Dream mutter through the phone.
"You alright?" Sapnap asked.
Dream didn't answer, and he hung up the phone. Sapnap groaned and pocketed it. Karl rested his head against Sapnap's arm with a sigh. The faint sound of laughter came from the other room.
"Why did George tell her that?" Sapnap asked.
"He doesn't want Dream to be uncomfortable. I mean, it would be weird to see your ex's child. George probably doesn't want to hurt Dream more." Karl said.
"Still. Lana might think Dream doesn't like her. I mean, not that he has too love her, she's a random kid he has every reason not to. But that would still hurt her." Sapnap said.
"Why is it so complicated." Karl muttered.
•
Sapnap sighed as he watched all the kids take turns to whack the miniature piñata. Karl patted him on the shoulder.
"You don't know how bad I just want to go in there and-" He mimicked punching something. "Destroy the stupid box full of candy."
"It's a kids game. And it's a tiny box with a very tiny bat. You would probably break all the candy inside while you're at it."
"I know. It would be epic." He said, as a boy feebly missed the box. "Pathetic." He muttered.
"Hey guys." George said, appearing out of nowhere, another drink in his hand.
"Hey. George. Can I have a turn hitting the piñata?" Sapnap asked. George just waved his hand and took a sip.
"Sure." He said. Sapnap grinned and was going to walk over, but Karl stopped him.
"George, do you want us to hang around to help clean up?" Karl asked. George shrugged.
It was Lana's turn to hit the piñata, so she secured the blindfold over her face and started swinging. She almost hit another kid. George quickly handed the glass to Karl and ran forward, stopping the bat.
"The piñata is forward, Lana." He chuckled. Lana started swinging again, her aim still off but at least not towards the other kids.
There was a knock at the front door, but George was distracted so Sapnap went to get it.
When he opened the door, his eyes widened. Dream was standing there, looking incredibly nervous, almost sick.
"Hey." Dream swallowed thickly.
"You came?" Sapnap said, moving to the side so Dream could enter. But he didn't. "You coming in?"
"I-I don't know. I didn't bring a present. I don't even remember driving here, I just-"
"You're already here, you may as well come in. We haven't done cake yet."
"Am I allowed in?" He asked, looking at the interior of the apartment.
"Yes. I'm sure you are." Sapnap tried to get him to come in, but he still wouldn't.
"I don't want to intrude. On... on his life."
"Dream, just come in." Sapnap said, grabbing the man's arm and tugging him inside, closing the door.
He pulled Dream to the living room, where Lana was still swinging. George had his hands over hers, to direct her swinging better. They were both laughing as they stumbled around.
Dream watched them. It was so jarring seeing George with her. Watching him be a father.
Lana hit the piñata and only a few candies fell out, but she ripped off her blindfold with a cheer and dove to grab them. George stepped back, watching her with a fond smile on his face.
"Hey, Lana. Look who I found." Sapnap called.
The girl looked up, along with everyone else in the room. Lana's face immediately lit up and she sprinted over to Dream, who bent down to her level.
"Dream!" She yelled, hugging him. He hugged her back.
"Happy birthday." He said, looking over her shoulder at George, who was standing there with no emotion on his face, just staring at Dream.
"You came!" Lana said.
"I did. I hope that's alright." He said, looking more to George than the young girl.
"Daddy, Dream came!" She said to her Dad. George nodded.
"Yeah. He did." He said, her hug him. "Um. Er." He looked at the other adults in the room, all sitting down and watching the interaction. Some with polite smiles on their face, most with confusion.
"This is... this is Dream, he's... he's um..." George didn't know how to introduce him.
"He's my best mate." Sapnap said, hitting Dream on the back, who stood back up. Lana was holding his hand tightly.
"Hi." Dream said, awkwardly to the parents. "I'm Clay, but most people call me Dream." He said.
All six adults who were previously watching him with polite smiles all reacted in surprise at his real name. Some of their jaw's dropped.
One of the women, who had a boy sitting on her lap looked at George, who was scratching the back of his neck.
"Oh. We have heard of a Clay." She said.
Dream froze. What has George told them?
"Well, it's lovely to meet you too, Dream. I'm Amelie, Patrick's Mom." That woman said, giving him a wave.
"I'm Thane, and that rascal is mine." He said, pointing to the boy currently trying to hit the piñata.
The rest introduced themselves while Dream smiled politely, but awkwardly. He regretted showing up. It was too awkward.
"Dream! Dream! Can I show you my surprise!" Lana said.
"Sure." Dream said, thankful for the break. She started pulling him out of the room, but then gestured for Sapnap and Karl to follow.
"Daddy! Come see my surprise for Dream!" She said. George nodded, but didn't know what to do with his hands, so he grabbed his glass of champagne and followed them.
Lana took them to her room, and pushed Dream so he was sitting down on her bed. She pulled Sapnap and Karl so they were also sitting down.
Dream looked around the room. It looked like a very typical young girl's room. Pink, with princesses and dolls and stars everywhere. It was adorable.
"Oh. That's my castle by the way." She said, pointing to the corner where there was a little house just big enough for her to fit inside.
Lana made George stand by the bed too, and she ran to her closet.
"What's this about, Lana? We have guests." George said.
"It's my surprise. Wait." She said. Dream's palms were sweaty, so he wiped them on his pants. He was nervous. And he didn't like how the tension followed them into the room.
"Okay." Lana said, standing back up. She had a paper plate over her face, which had a smile on it. Sapnap's face immediately lit up, but Dream was so confused. He had no clue what she was going to do and why she had a random smiley face mask on.
Lana cleared her throat.
"This video, my best friend tries to hunt me down and stop me from beating my craft. Can they stop me from beating the end ragon, or will I survive? This is my craft manhunt." Lana said in a very animated voice, trying to mimic Dream.
Sapnap and Karl both had to stop themselves from vocally awwing. They looked at George, who was pale. But when they looked at Dream...
His face had completely softened.
Dream couldn't help it. His eyes were watering. Minecraft manhunt was some silly little video idea from years ago that him and George had recorded but never uploaded. Being YouTubers was just a little dream, nothing had ever come of it.
Dream did still have all their recordings and ideas. But he hadn't watched a single one in four years. It hurt too much to hear George's voice.
Lana took off her mask and looked up expectantly. Sapnap and Karl started applauding and she smiled, but she looked at Dream and frowned.
"Is it bad?" She asked.
"No! No. It was amazing, Alana." Dream said, standing up and walking over to hug her. "You should be an actor when you grow up. You sounded just like me!" He said, quickly wiping his eyes so no one would notice. He carefully grabbed the plate and put it on his face, making her giggle.
"Did you make this?" He asked, realising it was his Minecraft skin smiley face. She nodded. "Wow, it's really good." He said.
"Can I see it?" Sapnap asked, and Lana walked over to give it to him. Dream stood up straight again, and looked at George, who was staring at him, also with tears in his eyes.
"She's seen our videos." Dream stated rather than asked. George looked at the ground.
"I've seened all the videos! Daddy let me watch." She said. Dream swallowed as he continued to look at George, hating the way the other man was just staring at the floor, glistening brown eyes still clear as day.
"Have you seen the videos I'm in?" Sapnap asked.
"You have the videos too?" Lana asked. Sapnap gasped and looked up at George.
"George what the fu-heck?" He said, making George look at him.
George didn't respond, he just finished the rest of his drink and walked out of the room.
•
Lana barely left Dream's side during the party, always holding his hand or pant leg. Dream felt awful because he felt like he brought a weird damper on the party.
Not for the kids. The kids were all having a great time. But George was doing well at avoiding everyone.
"I think I should go." Dream said softly to Sapnap and Karl who both frowned at him.
It was the end of the party now, finally. All the other kids and parents had left, and Sapnap and Karl stayed to help clean up like they promised George. Dream was only still here because Lana had tied his feet to a door handle with streamers. He could easily tear them off, but she seemed to find it hilarious.
"You don't have to yet. You can help clean up. Lana loves you here." Sapnap said, gesturing to the little girl who was sitting on the floor, tying extra streamers between his feet.
"I know but... this is George's house. And I don't even know where he is." Dream said.
"He's fine. He's just giving you space."
"It's his house. He shouldn't be giving me space in his own home. I intruded. I should go." He said, and stood up.
"Dream?" Lana looked up.
"I have to go now, Alana. But I'm glad you had a good party." He said. Lana frowned and stood up, hugging his leg.
"No! You can't leave! You won't come back!" She yelled. Dream looked at his two friends for help, but they looked just as lost as he did.
"I'm sorry-"
"Alana let go of Dream now." George said as he entered the room. He put the empty glass of champagne down on the counter and stared at her with his arms crossed against his chest.
"No! He's leaving and won't come back again!" She said, sounding like she was going to cry.
"I'm sorry-"
"Lana what did we talk about? Dream wants to go. You need to let him." George said. Lana curled up against Dream's pant leg and buried her face against it, softly crying.
Dream was lost for words.
"Alana. Stop bothering Dream." George said.
"She's not bothering me, George." Dream said, reaching down to pick up the little girl, and rest her on his hip. "She's just upset I'm leaving. It's not that big of a deal, don't tell her she's a bother, because she's not." He said. Lana rested her head against his shoulder.
George stood there for a moment, staring at them both.
"I just don't want you to be uncomfortable." He mumbled.
"She's not- she doesn't- I... I'm not uncomfortable." Dream said, but his stutter said otherwise. "Ok. Maybe a little bit, but that's not her fault." He sighed. "Don't tell your daughter things on my behalf. I like Alana a lot and she's not a bother."
George looked down at his feet.
"But it must be weird for you." George whispered.
"Yeah. It is. The entire situation is weird, but that's not her fault. That's our shit." Dream said, growing frustrated, not censoring his swear.
Karl took a step forward and pried Lana out of Dream's grip, taking her from the room. She fussed a bit but ultimately let him.
"I'm trying to give you an out. You don't have to hang out with her. You don't have to see her. You can just live your life." George said, his eyes pleading as he leaned against the counter.
"I don't have anything against her, George. She's just a kid. Yes, it can be strange to think about everything, but it's you who I don't want to see. It's you who is making this entire situation uncomfortable. Don't tell that little girl that it's her problem. Don't tell her it's her fault I don't want to see her. It's yours." Dream seethed.
"Alright! Ok. Dream, reel it in. George, go sit down." Sapnap interrupted, taking a step forward to stand between them.
"Then fuck off, Dream! I never even let you in my house. If you don't want to see me, and you don't want to deal with me, then leave me and Lana alone. If I'm the issue, then stop being fucking everywhere." George retorted. He was swaying slightly and his cheeks were tinged pink. He was obviously tipsy.
"It would be my pleasure." Dream basically spat, and he shoulder-checked George as he walked out of the room. It was the first time they touched, and Dream hated the jolt that passed through his body at the contact. But he shook it off.
George clearly didn't want Dream to have the last word, so he followed him through the house to the front door, Sapnap in tow, trying to stop him.
"Just keep out of my life. Keep out of Lana's life." George said.
Dream pushed open the door and stormed out of the house.
"Great, that's my goal. You're the one who told her about me." Dream called out behind his shoulder.
"Well why do you think I left you, hm? I don't want you in my life, Clay." George yelled once more, determined for the final word.
Dream stopped in his tracks just before he reached his car. He felt tears forming behind his eyes, the stinging feeling barely equating to the pain in his heart. George was standing at the doorway, a furious glare in his eyes, using the door handle for balance. Sapnap beside him looking pale with his jaw wide open.
Dream said nothing, just like George wanted. He got into the car and drove off without a second glance.
George collapsed, and Sapnap caught him before he hit the ground.
"Clay, wait." George called out, trying to stand back up.
"He's gone, George." Sapnap said stiffly, pulling the boy to his feet and steering him inside, closing the door behind him.
"Why did I say that?" George sobbed. "It's not true. None of it. Why did I say it? Why did I say it?" He repeated as Sapnap led him to the kitchen.
"God, George. How much did you fucking drink?" Sapnap asked.
"Why did I say it?" George said, grabbing Sapnap's arm once he was sat down.
"I don't know, George." Sapnap snapped at him, and the man let go. "You're drunk, and angry, and so fucking stubborn. You're an idiot."
"I know." George buried his head in his hands. "I know, I know. Ow." He clutched his hair.
"Sit here." Sapnap said with a sigh, grabbing a glass of water and filling it up. He handed it to George who started sipping on it.
"Guys?" Karl entered the room cautiously. "What happened? I put Lana in her room."
"Dream left." Sapnap said while shaking his head.
"I told him I don't want him in my life and that's why I left him." George said with a hiccup. "That's not why. It's not it at all." He sobbed, covering his face with a free hand, the other clutching the glass a little too tightly.
"We know." Karl said gently, patting George on the shoulder.
Sapnap looked at them both, and he suddenly felt extremely guilty in that moment. Him and Karl were with George, again. They weren't taking sides, but Dream had no one with him.
"I'm going to go." Sapnap said, standing up. George looked up with wide eyes.
"No, I'm sorry. Sap, I'm so so sorry." He said.
"George, it's fine. I'm just going to go check on Dream."
"Can you tell him I didn't mean it?" George asked, grabbing Sapnap's arm and looking up at him with teary brown eyes. He was using Sapnap's arm for balance while swaying on the chair. "Can you tell him that I'm sorry."
"You need to tell him that yourself."
"He doesn't want to see me ever again. Can you tell him I never wanted to leave him. And I still l-love him." George sobbed, swaying slightly. He hiccuped and closed his eyes. "I still..." He sobbed.
Sapnap looked up at Karl, lost for words. The other brunette was also stunned.
"You're drunk, George. Go take a nap. Karl is staying, he'll watch Lana for a bit." Sapnap said, pulling his arm away. George just nodded, sniffling as he wiped his face.
"Karl." Sapnap gestured with his head, and Karl quickly followed Sapnap out of the kitchen, leaving George alone for a moment.
"I can't believe how bad that went." Karl whispered.
"I don't know why I thought they could fix things." Sapnap sighed, looking at Karl. "Dream's still hurt and George is still scared."
"Inviting Dream was a bad idea." Karl said.
Sapnap nodded.
"We fucked up."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N
Sorry for the delay in posting! Had a chaotic few days.