Written 3/24/15 not edited at all
Written 3/26/15
Message to: princess
Sent: 11:42 PM
"Next time the date will involve lube and cock rings ;)"
Message from: princess
Sent: 11:48 PM
"Who said there was going to be a next time?"
Message to: princess
Sent: 11:50 PM
"I did ;)"
-----
Message from: princess
Sent: 3:43 PM
"Where's Zayn?"
Message to: princess
Sent: 3:47 PM
"He left."
Message from: princess
Sent: 3:50 PM
"Meaning?"
Message to: princess
Sent: 3:52 PM
"He moved"
Message from: princess
Sent: 3:53 PM
"oh. I'm sorry."
-
## look at me writing such depressing material. I cried a lil##
-I'm putting this story on hold, after this.
The author note about zayn was short and not so detailed because I couldn't bring myself to write anything longer but I'm writing it now..
I got introduced to this band by narry. I know that makes it seem like I'm only here for narry but I'm not. I was a bieber stan when I first joined wattpad and I saw Fanboy on my news feed so I thought I'd give it a go. I started shipping narry and I started getting more into one direction, memorizing all the lyrics, birth days... Harry was my first favorite. He was like my first shot of alcohol before I figured out what I really like, you could say. A few months later Liam became my favorite. I went through a Liam phase for such a long time before I got shot over to Zayn.
Zayn was my favorite member of One Direction, he still is. Zayn will always be in One Direction. Maybe not in out eyes, but in out hearts. Without Zayn Liam, Harry, Louis, and Niall isn't One Direction. They're just Liam, Harry, Louis, and Niall.
I couldn't fucking believe it at first. I thought it was some rumor. I was angry at first, so angry. I was so angry I cut Zayn out of some of my posters. Then I was sad. I broke down in tears.
I haven't been in this fandom for long. I've only been here since BSE came out. But Zayn leaving is possible the worst this that has happened to me after my grandma's death.
I love Zayn so much. I won't go as far as saying that if it wasn't for Zayn I wouldn't be here but I will say that Zayn makes me very happy. I'm so happy Zayn is putting himself first. I'm so happy Zayn is taking care of himself. I'm so happy, really. I feel so selfish but I wish that Zayn would've left after my concert, y'know? I just for onve wanted to see One Direction. It seems so selfish of me to even want that. It is. I know it is.
July 15, 2015. That would've been the day I saw One Direction. Now I'm just going to see Liam, Harry, Louis, and Niall.
No matter what I will continue to support the boys, no matter what path they decide to go down.
It's Zayn's decision and Zayn's direction. We just got to accept it.
I love you Zayn.