real life, instagram
YURI'S never hated school more than she does right now. Why does the hallways stretch on for ages? Why is time ticking by slowly? It's like school is taunting her, making her fall more sick out of anticipation. Even the thought of Jungwon doesn't soothe Yuri's nerves. She really doesn't want to face Saem again. Especially not with Jungwon attached to her side, because who knows what Saem will say.
Walking down the hallway to reach the music room, Yuri feels like puking. Jungwon's walking beside her, and still her nerves don't soothe.
"Yuri, are you okay?" Jungwon asks.
Yuri plasters a smile on her face, "as I'll ever be! But, seriously, do we even need the band? I mean, can't we just use the backing track or something?"
"Shouldn't we be authentic, though?" Jungwon responds.
"I'm sure I could remaster the sound on my macbook! I can watch lots of Youtube videos and then go from there," Yuri really doesn't want Saem in her life in anymore. She feels stupid, why did she ever mention she had connections to the school's music department? Yuri thought she would never see Saem again, but look at her now, on her way to bargain with the freaking Devil.
Jungwon frowns, "are you sure, Yuri?"
Yuri maintains her smile, "of course!"
"Look, let's see what Saem has to say, and then we'll decide from there. I think it would be nice to use the school's band!" Jungwon negotiates with the nervous looking girl.
Yuri's mood slightly increases and she claps her hands together happily, "great! Let's go tell Saem he can shove the idea of profit up his ass!"
Jungwon laughs, "I never said yes, Yuri, I just said let's see what this Saem dude has to say!"
Yuri rolls her eyes, "whatever. I don't want him working on this assignment anyway."
"Who is this Saem dude?" Jungwon asks the question thats been on his mind for a few days, who is Saem and why does Yuri's mood worsen whenever his name is brought up? And if Yuri doesn't want him working on this assignment, why did she suggest using the school's band?
"He's an idiot, Jungwon, that's all you need to know. He's the biggest idiot to walk this earth, and that says a lot considering my cousin is Seo-Jun," Yuri responds, a bitter frown crossing her face. Jungwon's surprised at how fast her mood changes when this Saem guy is brought up. She also seems very hesitant to even talk to him. Yuri's been looking sickly this entire day.
Jungwon reaches out and takes Yuri's hand, smiling at her softly, "we're in this together, Yuri."
This time, Yuri can't stop the blush that floods her face. She turns her head away from Jungwon's wandering eyes and does her best to ignore the butterflies blooming in her stomach. She can't handle these kinds of emotions. It's tearing her insides apart; her head wants one thing and her heart wants another. Yuri's stuck in between two cross roads.
Together, the pair stands in front of the door that lead into the music room. Yuri felt like the whole world was against her. She wants the ground to swallow her whole. She'd do anything to not look at Saem ever again, I mean, his face was quite revolting to look at.
"Yuri are we —"
Yuri's already pushing the door open, leaving Jungwon standing in the hallway by himself. Yuri looks like a woman on a mission. Yuri just wants to tell Saem to shove the idea of profit up his ass and leave. That's all Yuri wants to do. She already feels like she suffocating beneath the stares of familiar faces.
"Saem!" Yuri calls out.
He appears within seconds, a revolting smirk on his face that makes Yuri want to kick his balls even more. She watches his eyes trail over her shoulder and onto Jungwon who was trailing after Yuri, a stricken look on his face. He still wasn't used to Yuri's personality. One minute she was reserved and quiet in real life, and the next she was kicking doors down like she just did, seconds before.
"Hello Yuri," even Saem's voice was revolting.
"Shut up," Yuri snaps back, a storm growing in her eyes, "we're here to say that you can shove the idea of profit up your —"
"What Yuri is trying to say, is that we would love your participation in our business project," Jungwon cuts Yuri off. He ignores the deathly stare Yuri was giving him. He can stand his ground — it's not like Yuri's kinda scaring him right now.
Saem's smirk is permanent on his face, "ahh, Jungwon, you're still sicking around Yuri?"
"Saem," growls Yuri, stepping forward, "watch it."
Saem rolls his eyes and reaches out, brushing hair behind Yuri's ear. She slaps his hand away and Jungwon feels like he's intruding on something. He awkwardly shifts from one foot to the other, feeling small beneath Kang Saem's gaze. Saem's eyebrow raises and he cross his arms over his chest, still eyeing Jungwon.
"We're here to discuss how much royalties you'd get when we get the total of our sales," Jungwon explains to Saem, mainting a cool aura. He totally wasn't freaking out in the inside, with Yuri about to explode and Saem's intimidating stance, Jungwon feels like the smallest cat in the world.
Saem laughs, "I don't care about royalties and shit, I only said that to rile up Yuri," he winks at Yuri who growls, stepping even closer. Her fist is raised and her eyes bore into Saem. Yuri was so ready to punch the fuck out of the ugliest creature on earth. He deserves nothing but harm.
"You're a jerk, you know that, Saem?"
Saem raises his hand and cups Yuri's fist with it, sliding his thumb up and down her knuckles. Yuri can't help it — she unconciously relaxes beneath his touch. "Yeah," even his voice was softer, "I know that."
Then, Yuri's ripping her fist away from Saem and stepping back, a conflicting range of emotions flashing over her face, her chest heaving. Jungwon doesn't know where to look. He feels awkward. He can feel the underlying tension. Now he knows why Yuri doesn't want him to contribute to their business assignment, maybe Jungwon should just let her do whatever she wants to do.
"Well, I don't think we need you that badly, right, Yuri?" Jungwon speaks up hestiantly, his eyes nervously darting to Yuri, assessing her reaction. Jungwon felt like he was doing damage control right now, and he doesn't know if that's a good thing, or not. "I'm sure there are some songs we can manage ourselves."
Saem shrugs, running a hand through his hair, "I don't care. Yuri can make the decision."
Now, all the attention was on Yuri, who looked positively bewildered. Yuri didn't like how quickly the attention had shifted onto her. Yuri surveys her surroundings, her mind working in over-drive. Great, now Jungwon was letting her make the decision — why was Yuri feeling pissed over that fact? Jungwon definitely meant no harm in what he said previously, but yet Yuri wants to explode. Her hotheadedness gets the best of her sometimes.
"We'll let you know what songs you're needed for," Yuri decides, her words firm, "I can work on the songs myself."
Saem smirks, "are you sure you'll be able to focus though, Yuri?"
Yuri bites her lip harshly, retraining herself from causing physical harm to the revolting man standing in front of her and Jungwon. It was like Kang Saem was put on this earth to mentally destroy Yuri from the inside. He was there to taunt her, to bring out her inner fears, to make her remember her past and what Yuri who she was today. She hates Kang Saem with every bone in her body. She wishes death upon him.
"Be careful, Jungwon," Saem was saying, "Yuri might get bored of you soon."
"Saem, you're a piece of fucking trash. I hope you burn in hell, jerk," Yuri spits out harshly, her hands tightening into fists and her eyes blazing with anger. She spins on her heel, looking directly at Jungwon who was stuck to the ground, his eyes wide and his face puzzled. "Jungwon, let's go."
Yuri brushes past Jungwon, not waiting for him to follow her. Jungwon's eyes trail after Yuri as she exits the music room in a rush, ignoring the prying eyes glued to her figure. Jungwon turns back to Saem and bows awkwardly, "um, thanks, I guess? We're going to be recording next week, so I'll just ask Yuri what songs she can do and I'll send you the songs we need you for —"
"JUNGWON!" Yuri stood in the doorway of the music room, "hurry up."
Jungwon turns back to Saem and smiles awkwardly, "I'll contact you later. Bye, Saem." Jungwon turns away from the older boy, his pace quickening in order to catch up to Yuri who was probably halfway down the hallway.
"Jungwon," Saem calls out to the boy, earning attention from the boy he mentioned, Saem exhales heavily, "be careful with Yuri, alright?"
Before Jungwon could press on the matter any futher, Yuri's calling out his name again.
Yuri was walking through the empty school hallways alone, rage and fire burning at her body. All she could see was red. All she could hear was red — and Jungwon's footsteps racing to her side. "Took you awhile," Yuri mutters, barely able to contain her rage.
"Well, you did leave quite abruptly. I had to explain —"
"Whatever," Yuri cuts off Jungwon, and then — out of the blue — kicks at the nearest wall next to her. And regrets it. Searing pain floods her senses, but Yuri kicks at the wall again, her rage soothing the pain she was feeling.
"Yuri —"
"Shut up Jungwon," Yuri hisses out between clenched teeth as she now hops around on one foot, craddling the other with her hand, trying to massage the pain away. It was a pathetic sight to see; Yuri trying to maintain her balance on one foot, while Jungwon trails helplessly behind. There was a bench not too far from them, so Yuri musters up strength to hop over to the bench — only to lose her footing centimeters away from the wooden bench. Yuri presses her hand out against the wall to maintain her balance, but — somehow, Yuri's a beacon for disaster — she instead cuts her finger. She had placed her hand on a fucking bulletin board.
"Fuck," hisses Yuri, sticking her finger into her mouth.
Jungwon's hand appears on Yuri's back and he leads her over to the bench. After they've sat down, he opens his bag and pulls out a first aid kit. What the fuck? Jungwon has a fucking first aid kit? Yuri's judging him so hard right now, she doesn't care if she's being obvious or not. He could probably feel her judging stare bore into the side of his face.
"I'm the leader of six teenage boys," Jungwon responds without looking up, "I have to be prepared for anything."
Yuri smiles for whatever reason, and observes Jungwon in silence. Now that she was sitting down and letting someone take care of her — for once — she was able to organize her thoughts. So much has happened in like the past fifteen minutes. Yuri's become self-destructive once more, like how she was with Saem, and when her mother left her. The pain Yuri used to like because it made her forget about all her other problems happening.
"Saem and I, we used to date," Yuri says quietly as Jungwon packs his first aid kit away. Yuri knew Jungwon was desperate to know who Saem was, and now she was giving him an answer.
Jungwon looks at Yuri softly, his eyes are filled with too much concern and worry, Yuri almost melts on the spot.
"Last year, we dated. I was going through a rough patch, with my injury and all, but Saem was like a beacon of light and hope. He wasn't like this before. . . I mean, at least I think. Maybe he was always like this, but I was just too blind to see — sorry, I'm losing focus. Anyway, he made he feel special, he was so supportive, he cared about me and my well-being, he was always there for me when I needed him, and then, at some point he just stopped. Stopped making me feel special, stopped being supportive, stopped caring about me and my well-being and stopped being there for me."
Yuri frowns, her eyes darting away from Jungwon's figure beside her. Looking back, she realized how young and naive she was with Saem; there were so many signs, but Yuri ignored them because she was in love with him.
"I loved Saem. So much. But, he didn't love me enough," Yuri hates that feeling. She hates not feeling good enough for someone. She never wants to feel that way again. She never wants someone to make her feel that way again. "So, he cheated on me. With two girls. And when I found out. . . I just lost control, I kinda freaked out and said some stupid shit, broke things I shouldn't have broken. I was put in anger management classes for a couple months, but I've never felt a change. I still feel angry most of the time. I still feel like I'm not good enough for anyone or anything."
Yuri shrugs, "what else is there to do? The past is the past."
Silence embraces them for a moment.
"But you know what's worse? Saem made all these promises to me. He promised to always be there for me, he promised to never let me down — all that stupid shit, and he broke all those promises. The ones to never leave me, to never let me down, to always be there for me," Yuri laughs bitterly, "everyone who has ever promised something to me, has left me. My mom promised to never leave me, but she did. Saem promised to never leave me, but he did."
The throbbing pain in Yuri's foot was gone now. Her finger was hurting instead.
"So, I hate making promises now, I never make any with Seo-Jun and Ji-Woo. I don't know why I did with you. . . It just happened."
Jungwon's hand wraps around Yuri's hand, the one with the bandaged finger. He squeezes her hand gently, bringing her eyes to his, "I've always kept my promises, Yuri. I'm not going to make an exception for you."
Yuri's sucked into a wormhole. She only sees black. And bright, dizzing, stars. The ground opens up beneath her and all Yuri can feel is warmth spreading throughout her body. All she can feel is her head being dunked under water, opening her eyes to the true reality of her feelings; she feels something for Yang Jungwon. She's sure of it now. But, why does Yuri still not feel good enough? Her self-destructive thoughts take over and the wormhole disappears from around Yuri. She's back to reality now.
Standing up from the bench, Yuri also pulls Jungwon up with her linked hands, "there's a Frozen Yoghurt place a couple blocks from here, wanna see who can make the heaviest?"
Jungwon grins, revealing his dimples, "I bet I'll win."
"As if, you're ugly so you won't win," Yuri retorts.
"That —"
"Shut up."
liked by waitingforjin and 6 others!
kittyyuri this mf was taking photos of everything except me. wtf??
VIEW 12 COMMENTS!
kittywonie wAS NOT?!??!!?
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waitingforjin hmmmm......spending most of the day with jungwon? a night walk with jungwon? something smells a little fishy here
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swagojun Interesting.
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hayoonsprivate Cuties!!
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liked by kittyuri and 3 others!
kittywonie she attracts all animals. we stopped for like fifty dogs and cats. even a freaking frog appeared!
tagged, kittyyuri
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kittyyuri thank u for this post cat-boy (.❛ ᴗ ❛.)
↳kittywonie kittyuri you're welcome :)
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