My dad and I talked and talked for a long time, and after a couple hours I went to the kitchen to get a drink.
When I came back to the living room he was conked out in his chair snoring. I smiled and decided not to wake him, and went to look at my old room.
It was still so full of my things, I hadn't taken very much to my cousin's house and I'd taken an almost nothing with me to Colorado.
I ran my hand over all my books, sifted through my closet, went through my drawers.
It was exactly the way I'd left it, the bed neatly made, which I never actually did, and the rest of the room hurriedly tidied.
I found one brand new Nike tennis shoe on the floor near my dresser, and I remembered it was from the pair I had bought just before going to my cousin's, but I'd forgotten to pack them and so I'd never even worn them. I don't know why but this made me sad, and my eyes were moist as I picked it up.
They would still fit me, I hadn't grown any in the last two years.
That was just the crazy part for me, that it had been two years since I'd left this room.
My gaze stopped on the album I had on my dresser, and I opened it up and looked through the entire thing from cover to cover. Halfway through, I began to cry, silent, hot, swelling tears that spilled over and soaked my jeans.
I realized as I looked at the pictures of my mom that I couldn't remember her voice anymore.
I sat on my floor for a good hour and cried, but finally, I took a deep, shuddering breath and stood to my feet, putting the album back on my dresser. Suddenly I grew very tired so I layed down on my bed and closed my eyes, falling into a deep sleep.
I woke with a jolt several hours later, and looked around for the time.
I had a little less than an hour and a half before Dego was going to be back and I was supposed to be ready.
I stretched and set about dressing. I decided on wearing the new dress I'd bought, and went and got it from my bag from the living room.
Looking in my closet, I found a pair of heels that I used to hate, but realized that they were actually very elegant, and so I paired them with my dress. I put my hair into a low, artfully messy knot, and applied light makeup and some simple hoop earrings.
I stood before my full length mirror and admitted that I looked rather grown up, a lot more grown up than I felt. I headed down the hall and into the living room to wait for Dego to arrive.
My father was still snoring.
I wandered into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water, gazing out the window as I rinsed it back out.
A black german shepherd lounged on Weston's front porch, and I recognized it as Matt's, or at least it looked just like the one he'd brought with him several years ago.
I was just about to turn away when I saw the front door open, and Matt came out, clipped a leash onto the dogs collar, and led her off the porch.
The door opened again and my breath caught as Weston followed Matt down the steps and toward his truck.
He looked nearly the same as the last time I'd seen him, dressed in boots and jeans, a t-shirt and an old hat, but he looked like he had filled out more, he wasn't as slim as he used to be, but most of all, he had grown a beard, and that changed how he looked completely. Older, hotter.
Matt must have said something to him because he threw back his head and laughed, and even though I couldn't see from this distance, I knew how he looked when he laughed like that, and my heart stuttered at the remembrance.
They got in the truck and drove away, and I was left gripping the counter edge, my body shaking and a sick feeling in my stomach.
I couldn't even properly describe how I felt, but whatever that feeling was, I didn't trust, and so I pushed Weston firmly away from my thoughts and put up that shield I'd kept around my heart for the last two years. It was harder this time, much harder, but I forced myself to anyway.
I went back to the livingroom when I heard the sound of the TV, and I sat down and watched a documentary about the Ancient Nephalim with my dad, who was completely absorbed.
I heard a car pull up and stood, knowing it was probably Dego.
"Alright Dad, I'm going to RJ's, we won't be back that late," I said, bending to give him a hug.
"Alright, you better not be, I don't know that guy," he said, with a warning glance.
"Ugh, he's fine Dad," I rolled my eyes.
"Yeah, yeah, I don't care, I don't trust anybody."
"Don't worry, neither do I," I said wryly.
He nodded and turned the volume up on the TV, and I headed out the door.
Dego was just ready to knock, and when I stepped out he smiled and looked me up and down.
"Damn."
I laughed to cover my shyness and took his forearm, leading him back to the car with me.
"That dress looks so good on you."
"Thank you."
"Mmmmhm," he said, still looking at me as he buckled in and turned the car around.
Rj's was only a ten minute drive, located on Main street in between the old movie theater and the barber shop.
We walked inside and took a table near the window, and a waitress came to take our order.
I got a water as usual, but when I thought about food, that sick feeling I'd felt earlier returned, so all I got was a salad.
"How was your day?" I asked.
"Ah it was good, I was in Jacksonville all day though, so it's nice to be done with that."
"Ah I see. So who were you meeting with?"
"One of my cousins actually, he own several restaurants around here."
"Ohhh. Restaurants really do run in the family huh?" I joked.
"Yeah they do I guess," he smirked.
I glanced down at what he was wearing and had to admit he looked good. He had black dress pants and shoes and a curealean blue dress shirt on, sleeves rolled up at the wrists. He looked like a male model, not tall enough for one maybe, but the impressive thing was he owned his style, it didn't seem put on or fake.
I wondered with a small sigh why I wasn't attracted to him, for all his good points. It was so clear how much he liked me, and he was so sweet I wanted to like him back, but the feelings just weren't...there.
I glanced around the room and spotted the long time owner, Kevin, behind the bar. He was a great friend of my dad's, and I knew he would be glad to see me again, so I stood up to go say hello.
"Hey Dego, if you don't mind I'm going to go say Hi real quick to that guy behind the counter, he's an old friend."
"Go on Ave, I don't mind," he said, smiling.
"Okay, be back in a minute."
I sidled up to the counter and sat on one of stools. Kevin turned to me and was about to speak when I saw the recognition flash on his face.
"Hey Kevin."
"Avery Blackwood, what are you doing back here?" He asked, a slow smile spreading across his face.
"I came to visit," I chuckled.
"What in the world." He shook his head.
We caught up on each others lives and what had happened in the last while, and then I saw the waitress bring our food out, so I excused myself.
"Wait a minute, that your boyfriend?" He nodded toward Dego.
"Nooo he's not."
"Good, he's way too old for you," he wrinkled his nose.
"That's not the issue," I said with a smirk," But I appreciate the concern. See you Kevin," I winked at him and returned to my table, noticing another man sitting in my seat, talking enthusiastically with Dego.
I went and stood next to Dego, and he put a hand on my waist as if to acknowledge me, but the the other man barely seemed to notice me, giving me a brief nod and then continued his conversation.
I recognized him as Mike Tyler, one of the biggest mouths in the whole town, but he didn't recognize me apparently.
He loved talking to anyone new, and he'd never met a stranger, and if you accidentally ran into him, you might as well give up your entire day's plans.
After about 30 seconds of me standing patiently next to Dego, trying to think of a way to end this conversation so we could eat our food, Dego looked up at me and tugged me gently towards him. I think he'd thought the man would give my seat back, but now he realized the same thing I already knew. Mike Tyler was completely oblivious.
I raised my eyebrows at him and he pulled me more firmly, and glanced down at his lap as he pushed his chair away from the table a few inches.
I realized what he was offering then, and after a second of hesitation decided it was okay, and settled down into Dego's lap, resting my elbow on his shoulder.
Who knew how long it would be before Mike was done talking.
After a good twenty minutes without a pause in the nearly one sided conversation, I could tell Dego was getting very impatient.
He was bouncing his leg, tapping his fingers on my thigh, and becoming altogether irritated.
Our table was close to the door, and so when it opened all I had to do was crane my neck a little and I could see the person who entered.
My heart dropped when I saw a silky black german shepherd walk in, followed by Matt.